I have posted some of this before, but with all the recent threads whining about reviews, it seems like it is time to repeat and expand.

 

Let's start with a common misconception: The purpose of a review is to assist the next guy who wants to see a provider.

This is not even in the top three reasons for a review, so if a review does not help you, please do not whine about how the reviewer did it wrong. He did not.

Here are the purposes of a review, listed in decreasing financial order of importance. The main point here is that there are three parties directly involved in a review and so it is what it means to each of them that will always be most important.

1. Drive traffic to TER
2. Drive business for a provider.
3. The rewards it brings to the reviewer, which may include any or all of the following - TER VIP, the gratitude of a provider, discounts, and the emotional rewards of being a big dick who screwed this woman, gets to talk about it, etc. For some guys that means being a tough critic, for others it means just being able to relive it. Fictionally, of course.
4. Helping others to have good experiences with providers.

Complaining that a review did not succeed in achieving point number 4 is an almost meaningless comment. Who cares? Not TER, not the reviewer. Maybe the provider cares. So if you did not get what you want out of a review, it is not because the reviewer did it wrong. Your pleasure was not his concern.

Which brings me to the second major point. Please read this carefully and remember it - IF YOU ARE NOT GETTING USEFUL INFORMATION OUT OF REVIEWS IT IS ONLY BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT USING THEM PROPERLY. When you whine about how bad reviews are and how they steered you wrong, you are only saying that you are a clueless, whiny bitch. For reference see the previous point. The reviewer has zero reason to try to write a review that will be useful to you in whatever way you choose to use it, even assuming that he knows how you plan to use it, which he does not. There is not a right way to write reviews, assign scores, or use reviews. We each have our own way, and each one is as right as the next.

Next, we have the most common whine, so let's get that out of the way - please do not complain about how people give scores. Ratings are for lazy and stupid people, and if they mean anything it is very limited. Sure, it is attractive to look at scores and just pick ladies who have scores over 9, but to do so does not guarantee much beyond that you will be seeing women who have a pretty good idea how to manage the review system. How pretty they seem to you will vary all over the place, as will the services they provide and how well they provide them.

There are a few reasons why this is the case. You may consider some of these to be "good" reasons and others to be "bad." No one cares - they are all reasons and they all come into play whether you like it or not.

1. There is no common rating system. Everyone uses the numbers their own way, for their own reasons.
2. Even if there were a common, accepted definition to every score, people would still apply it differently. We each have a personal and subjective definition of beauty, for example. I like tall, slender women with natural breasts for example; others prefer sexy women with large breasts. My 10 would be nothing like theirs.
3. How well you get along with the lady will also affect the scores. I like slow, sensual, intimate, while others prefer to bang away; I am lukewarm on a BJ, but love to eat pussy, while others are exactly the opposite. So if I find a long tall, slender woman who likes to cuddle, caress, has a beautiful pussy and will let me suck and play with it to my heart's desire, I am very, very happy. Others want a super hot porn star screamer to fuck them silly - that rarely works well for me. I like a little intelligent conversation, too, and have a hard time with haters.
4. The mood of the reviewer enters into it. A lady who might be a 9 on a different day in a different situation, might get a 7 on a bad day for the reviewer. This is human nature - what we get out of a provider has as much to do with what we bring to the meeting as with anything she is or does.

So here is a clue on how to use ratings - the ratings in a specific review only mean something in the context of that reviewer's other reviews. A 9/9 for a guy who only gives 9s and 10s means absolutely nothing to me, but if that guy gives one lady 7s that means a lot; conversely that 9/9 would mean a lot if the guy only gives 7s and 8s, while another 7 or 8 would not mean much from him. Most of us have our own standards and forms for reviews, so if you want to use our reviews successfully, you need to figure out how we are doing them.

to be continue

Please read part 1 first if you want to understand all this.

The most important part of a review is the detailed description. No, I am not trying to sell TER VIP. It is here that the reviewer will tell you why he liked or disliked a lady. Sometimes he likes her because he has been seeing her for years and they are friends. In that case, if his scores are higher than what he normally gives, it is because of that relationship and not anything she did, or at least not anything I might expect her to do for me on our first date. Other times the score is lower because he got there late and she did not have the time or desire to settle him down, give him the full time he paid for, even though he burned through much of it before he arrived. He is taking out his frustration on her. Other times it is because she is taller, her breasts smaller, not as aggressive (not a problem for me!), or he was trying to get something from her that she does not or cannot give him. His reasons may be very important to you, or completely meaningless - you have to read to know them and make that call.

Yes the detailed description in a lot of reviews seems like it was written by a dim witted second grader, so you will not get much from those reviews. But it will not take a lot of your time to read them either. Scan them and move on.

The other important thing about a review is the reviewer. You need to know as much as you can about that reviewer if you want to use his review. How many reviews has he done? Is there a pattern to his scoring? How often does he review? Do you know any of the providers he has reviewed? If so, how does his review match up with your experience? Unless he only has one review and it is one of those with a short, second grader detailed description, it is not hard to learn a lot about him. And if you still have questions, drop him a PM. He might provide more helpful info in a reply. Just be polite about it and understand he is doing you a favor.

That's it for now, but let me recap the main points.

1. Reviews are not written to make your life easier, so stop complaining that they are not written the way you want them to be written.
2. Reviews can be helpful, but only if you put in some effort.
3. Scores only mean something in the context of each reviewer. No reviewer's use of the scores is wrong or right, so STFU about that. If you want to use scores, you have to look at all of a reviewer's reviews. There may be good and bad reasons in your opinion as to why one reviewer's scores will differ from what you would give, but they will differ from yours and it is not because he is wrong.
4. The most important part of a review is the detailed description, so if you want to use a review, read the description. Even if there is nothing much in the description, you have at least determined that there is nothing of use in that review.
5. The other most important thing about a review is the reviewer. If you want to rely on someone's review, make the effort to understand a little bit about how he reviews.

Finally, just to be sure that there is something in here for everyone to hate, let me add this. The majority of the women who work as providers for any period of time are quite lovely, try hard to please us and generally are good people. They would please most guys, in fact most would be thrilled to meet and bed them IRL. But we pay for their time so we can, and do, get a lot pickier. We want a certain look, and we want things done a certain way. Everyone accepts that, though it is not always fair to them, or likely to result is us having the best experience we can have. When we do not get what we want, we get angry, often a bit childish, and we start to blame everyone - from that mean provider who somehow mislead me and did not give me what I want, to those stupid or evil reviewers who lied to me.

Try to remember that you are seeing beautiful, skilled and delightful women who are working very hard to please you and enjoy it, rather than dwelling on the ways they disappointed you and acting like a whiny little bitch. Also remember that you used the information available to you to choose that women, you controlled the whole situation, and if it went bad, be a big boy - own it and learn from it. Otherwise you will miss a lot more than you hit, and you will keep missing in the same, dumb way. It is okay to make mistakes, but to keep making the same mistake and keep blaming others for it is too fucking dumb for words.

Zig out

I've noticed a lot of guys here and on other sites say that they don't even read or pay much attention to the actual reviews. And that confuses me because while each individual experience is going to be different, that doesn't mean that you won't be able to benefit from parts of each review. An intelligent, well thought out review can be a highly valuable asset. A man who takes the time to verbally describe a woman's physical appearance can add significantly to what you see in any photos that are provided online. Pay attention to the details of the encounter and you might just learn a lot about her attitude and demeanor. If the provider you are researching has quite a few reviews, you can read them all and piece together common threads. Similar experiences that others have shared could give you an advantage going into the date.

Bottom line for me is that I understand that no two people are going to have the same experience with the same woman. But dismissing all reviews because they don't really reflect what your experience will be is like never reading a book written by someone else because it's written from someone else's point of view. You choose to get out of it what you want, and if you do your due diligence in researching the right provider for you, you will have many more positive experiences than negative ones. And these reviews can go a long way towards helping you with that.

And if you happen to have a negative or simply neutral experience with a woman who has had largely positive reviews, then step back and try to examine why that was. Whether it was something you did or perhaps she was having an off day. The previous reviews written about that provider reflect how those people felt about THEIR experiences. There is no right or wrong here. These are all subjective and it is important to understand that going in.

And outstanding job by ziggy for these two posts!

With most of this.  I take alot of factors into account when I read a review.  Many of which you stated.  I do, however grumble when I read the 2nd grader review.  Its kind of annoying, but at the same time Im not posting about it.  Just grumble to myself and move on.  And although the purpose that you state may not be to warn or help the next guy I generally write my reviews for just that reason.  I want to help the next provider who sees the lady Ive seen.  I frequently PM and get PM's about my reviews and try to answer as honestly as possible.  I also generally give the answer "I liked X but thats my thing, YMMV"  Other than that aspect, great post, I enjoyed reading it.

TER Client/Reviewer for November 2014! A newbie or senior TER member/reviewer can benefit greatly by your words of review wisdom.

Hey zig.  

So I read your two part post. I have to admit, when someone writes with conviction, like you did, you hope to learn something from them. I.e., you seem smart and inspired , so I am hoping to read your post and come away more knowledgeable about the process for having done so.

I don't know, I guess I'm not sure I understand your message, to be honest. You say that reviews aren't written for others, or to make their choices easier. Your premise is that people write reviews for self serving purposes, which is mostly valid. And you basically are suggesting that the review is so subjective that whatever score is assigned is meaningless insofar as it applies to the reader.

So, why is reading more of a particular reviewers reviews any more meaningful? If one is subjective, as well as potentially influenced by other factors (mood, expectations,etc), all of which I agree with, then how does the cumulative experience of that person change the value of their reviews? They are all subjective and all potentially influenced by extenuating circumstances. No? If a guy is habitual 9/10-er...and he suddenly gives a 7...then....something happened! Specific to his own experience. What signal does that send you, if we agree that they're all subjective anyway? Or that, since all reviews are self serving anyhow, why give any credit to anything anyone writes! I don't know. I didn't come away with any better understanding of 'what reviews are for'. I got a good dose of why you shouldn't put much stock in them, which I largely agree with..but, I'm not inspired to read more of them to feel like my choices are better. Know what I'm sayin'?

I applaud your conviction at any rate

END OF MESSAGE

END OF MESSAGE

...and will add that appearance scores are almost irrelevant so long as guys comment about her looks as compared to her photos.  If I think a lady looks like a 10 in her photos and her reviewers say her photos are accurate - then I don't really care if her appearance ave is only an 8.

bingo. and ditto

to you.  If a reviewer points out that the photos are old or 10-15 pounds ago, that is a different story.

The biggest value in the reviews is reading the description of the encounter.  It gives you an idea if the provider is truly GFE or just goes thru the motions.  Therefore, the reason for TER VIP.  The cost is well worth a lost donation because the provider was below your expectations (from her pics or reading her profile)

There are guys who give all 9s and 10s....  Not because they're just thrilled to be with a warm body.  But because THEY'RE HOT!!!!  I've met a guy who was such a PHENOMINAL lover, and person (inside and out) that HE should be getting paid!  I literally had to do NOTHING but lay there and it was probably the best sex of my life.  So this guy gives all 9s and 10s because of what he brings to the session.  He could be with a blowup doll and the session would still be a 10!

-- Modified on 11/19/2014 9:18:21 PM

That wasn't necessary, but still appreciated!

Simply put, reviews contain lots and lots of useful and valuable information, that you cannot get anywhere else. But the information only makes sense if you also understand its context. The reviewer is as important as the review.

The most useful information is what you can expect from a provider in terms of her performance. While there certainly is a degree to which your experience with someone will be unique, different from what I or anyone else would experience with her, the fact is that most of what she does is going to be the same on with everyone she meets. And she will be at her best doing what she is comfortable doing.

All of this gets to the specifics of how to use and research reviews. I do have a way I do that, with two goals in mind. I want to avoid bad dates, and to avoid spending more time than I have to reading reviews. I have a way that works for me, but it is just how I like to do it. Probably will post more on that at some point, see if I can get others to share their methods in return.

zig

"The biggest value in the reviews is reading the description of the encounter.  It gives you an idea if the provider is truly GFE or just goes thru the motions.  Therefore, the reason for TER VIP.  The cost is well worth a lost donation because the provider was below your expectations (from her pics or reading her profile)."

Absolutely. Not just how GFE she is, but also what she does, what she does well and what she might not do much or well. A lot of us want to imagine that our dates are unique, our experience something special only we shared, but of course the truth is that most of what she does is the same every time.

The other thing is that there is a lot of value in finding others whose tastes seem to agree with yours. Then you can either follow them as they review and post, or PM them and see if you can set up a direct line of communication. Not only might they share more, frank information than they post in their reviews, but I have also asked for info about a woman who seemed lovely in the moment, and the reply I got was something like "Can't say anything about that woman, but why the hell are you looking at someone that (insert adjective here)? That does not seem at all like your style." And he was right, too. Not that I always took this good advice - then I could write the review that says, "I would have given her a higher score but I do not like really large, fake breasts and hers were bigger than I like" which is exactly what it says on her profile.

Okay, I would not write that, probably would not review her at all, because that disappointment, the fact that she looks the way it says she looks but I did not read it carefully, that is all on me.

zig

And I didn't mind paying.

I agree with what you said, zig, but to me it goes even further.  Yes, the numbers are bullshit.  Yes, the "juicy details" are fiction.  But taken together and used properly they are still a useful guide when used with other info.
1) Get to know the reviewers.  If you've seen a gal and certain reviewers rated her the same way, their reviews of other gals are more to be trusted.
2) A benefit of writing a goodly number of reviews is other reviewers will be more likely to help you if you PM them about a girl they've seen.  Back channel is a great way to get the truth. If all you do is lurk, no one will help you.  Why would i subject a girl I've seen and like to someone I don't know?
3) Go to M&Gs.  See what the gals look like face-to-face.  It's a great way of judging the value of their reviews, and the guys who wrote them.  You also get to meet guys who can become valued back-channel resources.
There's more, but it's late and I am durnk (intentional typo).

But I get your point. Lately, from thinking about what attitude is behind some of the disgruntled posters on what empty sessions they have, I wonder if it has a lot to do with men who get into P4P too young, before they have genuine loving relationships, especially those who instead watch porn and equate making love to porn antics. Maybe women in days past suffered in a simililar way from watching romcoms during the Blue Law era. And the men back then too, I suppose.

And, maybe too much involvement with ANY media, especially if in lieu of finding connections and defining for themselves what those relationships mean, stifles or warps a person's concept of what good sex is. Kind of like domestic animals become locked in adolescence and less able to thrive on their own than wildlife. Just a related thought.

Yes you got my point.  You get out of the experience what you bring to it.  Guys who are extraordinary lovers or have magnetic personalities are probably going to have a good or great time with ANYONE.

and insightful posts! We all make our own experiences, for good or ill. Sour and jaded just doesn't cut it!

Of course, when you are as heinous in appearance and socially inept as I am, it can be difficult to stay positive and confident.

This is the most sense anyone has ever made on a review post, and I think it should be attached to any review post ever in the future.

My method is much simpler. And it reflects what reviews should be in MY opinion. Does she look like her pictures? Is there anything noted that is negative and therefore, out of the ordinary. The rest is blather...only because, as you accurately point out, it's biased and subjective. Knowing that, I could care less what someone writes as it relates to what they did, or what they talked about, or whatever. It has no bearing on what my experience will be.  

I only want to know if the person that knocks on that door is the person I see in the pics. If not, there's a problem right from the get go. If it is? Then the rest is a mutual dance, with responsibility to make it a good session on both of our shoulders, but I know going in she's going to get the best version of me. The rest is just natural chemistry. You either have it or you don't. You can't manufacturer it. You can fake it. And if one, or both,  of us has to fake it to make the best of it, so be it. I can live with that. That's not her fault, or mine. That's just human nature.

IMO

but should probably be required reading for all new members...

It should be required of all members. The newbies may not be the problem here lol.

END OF MESSAGE

But I doubt that the ones who need to read it will... and the ones who do read it, probably don't think it's directed at them...  

so, while I applaud the effort, I am skeptical that anything will change... not sure there is a cure for stupid.

old, fat, covered in back and nose hair, socially inept, have an IQ and penis sized for a small insect and need a full tube of Brylcreem to keep your comb-over in place.... you'll fish for any compliments you can get!!!

Zig,

Agree with most of what you said, well done!  Frankly, what I think it comes down mostly in terms of getting the most out a review as you pointed out, is to get a better sense of the reviewer himself.  Check out their history, who have they seen, how do they tend to rate, do you have any overlap, etc., etc...  That way you can put it into its proper context, then compare and contrast.   From there, being able to PM and backchannel can get a much more complete picture.  

Sparta

That disagreeing with the whiners is not being rebellious, it's having common sense - it's very ok to think for ourselves lol.
 

-- Modified on 11/20/2014 11:15:21 AM

Well! That certainly puts this whiny bitch in his place!

But, thanks for taking time to share your insights. I actually feel like I learned something.