since your plumbing is functioning.

Hard to diagnose on such lean information, but your post does prompt at least this question:

If you function so well in the civie sex world, why are you interested in P4P?

Perhaps the answer to that will lead to an answer to the other question.

Ertotic Highway Board, I'd send you right over to her but unfortunately she has gone on to bigger and better doings.

I'm no healthcare professional, so the guesses I could take wouldn't really be worth the bytes I'd waste on them.

What I would suggest is seeing a psychologist or councillor of some kind.  To this end, go over to The Erotic Highway Board and do some research on the organization that The Love Goddess belonged to, and find some practicioner that belongs to it in your area.

(Does anyone remember the name of that outfit?  I think it had something with sex surogates, or the like in the title.)

You need a trained, sympathetic and sensitive ear for woes like this.

I'm not sure it is relavant to your situation but here goes:

No masturbation for one week before a date.

In other words, save your mo-jo up and don't dissapate it.

I've taken this to heart and now I get more pops per session than I used to.

I generally have no trouble at 2 pops in 1 hour with non-providers.  But when I see a provider, I am having trouble sometimes even for 1 pop. Can someone offer some insight and suggest a way out!!

To answer to your question, the civvie life has not been going well and I had a breakup. So I tried seeing a few providers and faced this problem. Any suggestions?

-- Modified on 11/13/2011 12:03:16 PM

You probably feel dirty or guilty with a provider, you got some hangup there.  that's my unprofessional opinion.

So what should I do? One issue - both providers I have seen was dressed scantily when I walked in and I believe I got into the act too quickly. Do you feel I should maybe do a meet or greet for 15-20 minutes and then get into the action. I have been thinking about scheduling a longer session but wanted to be sure

Were you wearing protection in your civvie life?  Wearing a condom can greatly affect the sensitivity and thus your popping ability.

No condom in civie life! That's true - then the issue is what should I be doing? Asking for a BBBJ? My partners have never sucked me to completion! Sorry folks for the bother but I am looking for some genuine help.

this is certainly, mental / emotional.  Like trying to perform while knowing you forgot to mail the morgage payment!  Try to set yourselF up for success by controling the environment to be free of distractions.  Soft music, no outside noises.  
I suggest you not be focused on a lot of pops...  figure on one...  but get into the lady you are with.  Just enjoy being naked with her.  When you get into action, focus on the sensations.  Do not stress yourself.  
If you focus on her...  "ole Henry" may soften up...  when the focus shifts back to you, he should respond just fine.  This happens all the time with me.   Ole Henry is at attention when he needs to be.
skb

I have been seeing mostly agency girls and it is impossible to know them. Tried an independent but she rushed through the session

You don't mention your age, but I surmise you are a relatively young hobbyist.  You said you didn't use condoms for your civvie sex, but do in hobby dates.  I'm an older fella, and I don't even worry about a second pop, as my dates, other than overnights, are for just 1 hour.  In also find that I only pop in the condom about a third to half the time.  Do I worry about it?  He'll no!  I'm just happy as all get out that I am having fun with a hot babe.

I suggest you just relax and enjoy the moment, and not worry so much about multiple pops.  If it's gonna happen, it will, if not, just enjoy the time with the lady.  It's quite possible that if you stop dwelling on this, and relax, it will be more likely to happen.

Swim

When you pick civvies, you go for the woman that is the hottest to you. Do the same when you pick providers. During the day when I called phone agencies or relied on escort mall ads, there were times that I would pick a woman based upon a hot photo. But when the woman showed up, she was disappointing, to say the least. If things did progress to sex, I often found myself unable to finish. Finishing the job after the woman left allowed me to get relief, but I felt bad about wasting money.

Use reviews to pick the provider that you want. Don't feel bad about picking the hottest one for you, if she has a good review record or work in a situation where you can be sure that she is ligit. Some agencies will push providers your way that aren't getting business. Don't go for that. The providers that are the hottest to the most men book solid, if it is one of that type that you want to see, call and get a slot, if the agency attempt to direct you to someone else, make your desire known. Indies will sometime shovel off friends on you, if you thrust the indie, you may give her friend a shot.

When you start picking the hottest provider for you, finishing multiple times won't be an issue you have to deal with.

Look for them on your local board. Pick a provider that makes you long to be with her. The hobby is 90% mental. Once your engines have revved up for a provider the rest is easy.

Sure, most likely the lady will be scanily clad upon your arrival.  Take a bit of control & let her know you want to just lye together so you can enjoy the sense of her.  I like to lye on side front to front.  Feel her warmth...  Inhale her scent.  Slide your hand from her shoulder down her rib cage to her waist then over the flair of her hips.    Once you are alone you can whisper you want to go slow...  Ask if that's ok.  (Most will be ok as it's less work for them.)  Just tell her you want to enjoy the moment...  there's no rush.
skb

In the civie world you know your not pressed for time and can do what you need to. But in the Hobby world you have limited time and that is lingering in the back of your mind which may be affecting juniors performance.

Thanks for the advice. Will try out some of the tips.

The glove has given me performance problems now and then...and my friend, if you've never had a BBBJ2C, do yourself a favor and get one...

Alternatively, you might check with the provider if she is willing to use the female condom...they're not cheap, and I would imagine not every provider would be willing to use them on a first appointment, but the more high end ones and ones you've seen more than once, or that you perhaps discussed the option with beforehand might be willing to try them.  They're amazing and allow you to move from foreplay to sex without all the fumbling, which might be part of your problem, and the sensation is SO much better.

My .02

The civie might not like it, but start using them with the civie life. When I was young with my wife we did bar all the time. Then when the 2nd kid came along I got highly motivated to use a condom. It took a while, but I got use to it. Also the condoms are much better than they were 10 years ago in terms of sensitivity. There are some condoms that I won't use because they make me pop to quickly (Trojan Ultrathin). You might want to try those first though then migrate up to the regular ones. It also helps if the women you are with know how to put a condom on your dick with their mouth.

well if you think about the situation you wont be able to perform but if the girl is hot let go free your mind take a deep breath and have fun dont feel guilty its just casual sex

yourbrainonporn.com

Yes, this is very true.  No self-pleasure!  Your body is a good learner & you a good teacher & you are conditioning your body to respond quickly to direct intense stimulation.  P*ssy is not like that...  especially with a cover.  F/M or none at all.
skb

Honesty. Explain to her in advance about your situation.

Book an extra hour so that you have additional time and don't feel rushed. You might also try gettin a cock ring (I prefer the flexible disposable ones) from an adult store.

They tend to help out quite a bit.

Relax, avoid alcohol and medications (other than ones for ED). If the natural way does not work you might try talking to your doctor about getting a prescription. Good luck!