I have been seeing providers for the last three years. I have several I am regulars of. I see them every time they tour my city.

so instead your strategy has to be to get around it.

The term is often mis-used. Sometimes it means you're on her Do Not See list, which is not a real blacklist. Then there are real black lists that girls use to warn others about bad actors. Either way, there's really nothing you can do about it. Just keep doing what you do. It probably won't have any affect on you.

I am a single mom of 2 & it’s the hardest job in the World. I am also, a 100% independent provider with empathy. I have never used a booker. I have seen many men who have been blacklisted because everyone has a bad day. I have never put anyone on the blacklist myself. I would pick providers who care. We all have the freedom to choose who we share our time with. Happy 2024!

You are the perfect example of a client who despite doing everything the right way, which included paying cancellation fees, was still blacklisted for little to reason at all. I wouldn't stress this too much. You will still be able to see providers. Providers are like the fish in the sea or sand on a beach, there are so many of them and not all of them will be using the same blacklists or any blacklist for that matter. I also find it to be a shame that providers don't actually use these blacklists for really bad clients who actually hurt and harm them. Instead, these blacklist are used for clients who cancel their appointments or clients who request a little bit more information on the services they provide.

With (potential) girlfriends and escorts, never get stuck on a particular one.  Like the performers who spin plates on poles, you keep a lot of them going and if a few drop off, you just spin up some more.  

It kind of sounds like you might be the type to give a provider your Real World Information.
If that's the case, stop it immediately!

You only list one example of a girl that wont wont see you bc of the black list. Of course that is concerning but certainly not something that is cataclysmic for you most likely. Now, if you had 3 or 4 girls in a row saying the same thing or not getting back to you at all, that would be highly problematic, but as others have said your faux pas was more of a minor one and a bit out of your control. You don't have a reputation on the BL for being a risk to the girl physically or emotionally. You are simply a financial risk to them at worst.
I wouldn't change a thing unless you get a few more providers radio silence you or come out with the truth. At that point, you can then possibly offer up a deposit as that very well may allay their financial concerns. I wouldn't do so willy nilly, meaning there are rules I go by when giving a deposit but I would think, if you are telling us the full truth, that your situation is eminently fixable.
The other thing you may want to do is give more info than requested. IOW, if the next girl asks for 2 references, send 3 if you have them. That may make your case stronger and may have a girl overlook your past issues.
But let's not put the cart before the horse just yet. Keep doing what you were doing and see how the next 3-4 date requests respond and then implement my strategies if need be. Good luck.

For many sellers it seems like BL is not reserved for detrimental clients, but rather anyone they simply don't like or did anything to diminish their biz.  

Can you give us some names of people that post here fairly often that state providers "never abuse their power?"

I’m sorry to hear this, it sounds like you’ve done what you could. I see people even though they have bad reviews sometimes. Then I have great experiences and so do they. I’ve given 2 references to girls and they called telling me off or texting me like it’s my fault they had a bad experience . Everyone has a bad day but also not everyone has good chemistry. I say just move on if a provider says no. It’s just not meant to be and there are a ton more where we come from. I wouldn’t think twice about it and definitely don’t stress about it. A lot of people who arent parents don’t understand emergencies happen. Hope you find some willing to give you a chance. Also, there are apps we can give you guys reviews on. Always ask if their experience was good, to leave a good review. Most would be willing to do so.

I'm not about to go on a witch h.unt here and derаil the thread.  

Or engaged in some hyperbole perhaps. Not a federal crime so you're good. lol.

One of my provider friends told me she's run into a few situations where a rich client was blacklisted by another provider in an effort to keep him coming back to her exclusively.  

Eddie, kiss me goodnight. -- Topo Gigio

If OP is pursuing providers who review blacklists then not using real life info is just going to result in him being completely disqualified from the start. All you’re doing is setting him up to have even more limited options. That may work for you but at least be upfront about it increasing his likelihood of being ignored in his search for providers. If he’s taking this hard, he’s gonna take it even harder when he realizes he’s got even fewer options to choose from without giving RL info.

It seems that way because you don’t know the difference between a Do Not See list and a Blacklist. One absolutely is for documenting clients who diminish business, and why wouldn’t it? After all, this IS a business and we need to avoid as many risks of incurring sunk costs as possible. All the provider does with a DNS is explain why the client creates a cost risk, then it’s up to all other providers that review the information to decide whether or not this is a dealbreaker for their personal client criteria. If you’re upset about a professional sharing factual info with their colleagues to help them make informed business decisions, then maybe you should go on Tinder. This is an industry, not your local dating scene.

You got banned from another discussion board for your wild claims attacking agencies and the providers who worked there.  

You sound so backwards with that advice!

I had screened with a local Asian provider who used an assistant. I was in close contact with the assistant and provided all requested info in a timely manner. He told me I was good to go and to reach out by text to schedule.  

trash and full of lies from unstable dangerous providers. Provider safety, my ass. More like a database of future blackmail material.

I am sure some women abuse the BL system to be sure, but the lists are vital in keeping SWs safe. I hate to break it to you but there are some really dangerous men out there and the women need a forum where they can go to get info that can keep them from harm.

Agree about the dangerous men but the really dangerous are hiding their identity making it as difficult
Or more so then finding the identity of those who only want to be “asshats here”
The blacklists will stop the unclean , the discourteous , and time wasters etc . but the real ones nada!!

And in fact that's always been true and probably always will be. Just like the rest of the many subjects some come here to whine about.

your trusty steed to the rescue of providers, do you hold your sword high in the air for all to see, or do you keep it sheathed?  Just curious.  

Do you really believe a BL hasn't protected any women from physical or mental abuse? Of course they have. They aren't perfect but they are another tool a women in this line of work to help keep them safe. Ask yourself this...if you were a provider, would you really not look up a guy on a BL who contacted you for a date? The answer is obvious.

just use a new hobby alias.   get a new (fake) ID.  setup new linked in.  etc...   My hobby identity was setup 20 years ago. .  
 always worked.  see some newbie friendly girls.  get them to give you references to new escorts that require them.  a lot of gals don't even follow up with references anyways.  just the act you send them is sometimes enough.  also going forward I would pay the girls full rate when you cancel.  not half.  Full rate.  I do this and they are always very appreciative and I always get a stellar session when i do get to see them.

I haven't gotten banned from any other discussion board for "attacking agencies and the providers who worked there". This is just an outright lie you have no shame in making up.  

Do you have a reading comprehension problem? My comment wasn’t about subjective concepts like what is better or worse, so I’m not sure why you’re bringing opinions into the equation. I also did not provide any advice, I genuinely don’t care what clients like you who decide against screening do because you are a non-factor when it comes to my business.

I was going to say that also. Blacklist is really for clients who were abusive or violent. Do Not See can really be for any reason, but the provider should really spell out the situation so the next provider can make a personal determination. I would say just be proactive about it and say that the provider did not follow up with you a day or two before and unfortunately the short notice caused a conflict with your work/child care schedule.

Wow, so your solution is just to be a lying creep? And to be a  lying jerk and prey on new girls in the industry is just the frosting on the cake. Gross and disgusting. Individuals like you who think this is completely normal behavior (it is not) and to pass along this advice to others is what continues to make this industry dangerous. Be a better person.

First figure out what you might have done wrong and make sure you don't do it again.

stats that support the opposite of my hypothesis.  I could be wrong, but in my experience seeing a few thousand providers, I don't think so.  What have you got that says otherwise?  

How dare you question a misogynist that moonlights as a racist. Thank God he used "discussion boards" as his source as they are clearly a reliable account. lol.
Then his insecurity in his numbers come shining through when he asks you for your stats when you have already stated there are no stats to say this definitively. But he really loves women! Dont believe me?  Just ask him and he will provide a link as proof! He is SO insecure. It's sad really.

Don't you know they are based on rock-solid sources like:
1) The polls he does of his Mexican maids.
2) Signs he sees in store windows.
How could you want more than that????

weak-minded that you can't think of anything new to come back with.  How many times have you said the same thing?  I asked you once how many providers you have had real-life relationships with and all I got was crickets.  You are too insecure to date a provider in real life.  If you are going to be in a relationship, you have to be willing to stand up to them and hold your own, and you have demonstrated day after day here that all you can do is kowtow to them with your nose up their collective asses.   Go ahead and repeat ten more times that I'm the one who is insecure and we will all have a good laugh while you continue to suck-up to providers.  When did you get castrated and who has your balls now?  

There’s plenty of providers that will still see i with a bit of an explanation it’s seems the girls had a bad day and u somehow got the bad end of the stick.

So he's not exactly logic based, eh? And he is SOOOOO thin skinned as most insecure people are. I heard on another board he posts on, they have the REAL stats there. I'll keep looking. LOL

How could you have seen thousands of providers, yet you only have 400 reviews? I thought you said you write reviews of all your experiences? And the only real way to determine if a hobbyist actually knows anything about this industry we go off their reviews, right??  
I am just a country bumpkin that is not very good at math, but your "hypothesis" and math just don't seem to be adding up.  

I have been a TER VIP member since 2008, but for many of those years, I was still reviewing as CDL on another website.  If you check my review history for CDL, it starts on TER in 2015.  I have reviews on TER under multiple aliases, and reviews on other websites under multiple usernames.  I have often said here for years that my hobby days are Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays.  Do you want me to walk you through the math since 2008, or are you capable of doing it yourself?  (And I actually saw over 200 providers before I even joined TER in 2008.)  

Serious question: are you able  to extract any nuance from conversation? Obviously we know the answer is no online, but just wondering how you are in person. You are so thoroughly lacking any sense of humor or able to grasp the tone of comments at times it is actually uncomfortable. I am not a mental health professional, but from your posts you are either on the spectrum or British. Or both.

put their foot in their mouth or step on their dick, this is not the first time your walk-back was to say, "I was just kidding."  Nobody is buying it.  It's getting old, Bumpy.   BTW, if you think I might be British, check out some of my London reviews.  

What exactly am I doing wrong?  I pay the girls they are happy.   My hobby identity is impeccable.  Never haggle over money.  Always respect the girls.  Isn’t this the client you want?   Or are you hung up on me preserving my real identity?   I don’t know any personal information of the girls I see.  I don’t want to know.  

No, you are 100% not the client I want. The fact that you even have to ask that after the disgusting "advice" on how to bypass safety measures you gave is beyond reproach. You and "clients" like you are the reason providers are leaving TER and other reviews boards in droves.  
You and "clients" like you are the reason sex work industry abolishers are able to keep sex work illegal by you posting this dangerous and disgusting narrative that the sex work abolish groups continue to show as the reality of sex work.  
News flash: you are not a big deal. No one gives a shit about your real identity.  
And last but not least, if you want to show respect for providers the first steps would be to not call us girls (we are grown ass women).  
Get some self respect and start showing respect. You know better and can do better.

I am not kidding. I really do think you are on the spectrum.

yes I am not a big deal.  but yet i still need to keep my real name hidden.  maybe because my wife would not be happy about it.   if its not a big deal please post your real ID and info here.  I'm waiting.  SAFETY goes both ways.  How do  
i know you are not a scammer setting people up for a robbery?

I am an open sex worker, my real identity is known and I give it out to all of my clients. So yes, it is very much a 2 way street of honesty that I hold all of my clients accountable for.  Yes, I am very angry. I am very angry that people like you seem to think that your behavior and comments are acceptable. They are not. I do a background check on all of my clients before I see them, and yes, I have turned away gents who think they are being smart by sending me false information.  
Are you really that dense to think that you are the only guy out there who is married or in a relationship? Are you really that dense to think that sex workers are really just one dimensional play toys and you get to pick a new one every week? Are you really that dense to not think we also are married? Have children? Have grandchildren? Families? Communities? Lives outside of our professions?  
No, you have not done anything to me personally, but "clients" like you are a stain on this industry that we need to move forward from. Your blissful arrogance to your phycological and social ineptness is psychopathic.    

After all, the guy only said he wanted to keep his real-life info secret. And it seems to have worked for lots of women since he's got nearly 100 reviews here. Also, he never said nor implied that you don't have a family or are a "one-dimensional play toy." That's all right out of your imagination. Not to mention calling the guy a psychopath. You really need to check your definitions. And curb your anger.

Exactly!!
Like I've stated before, we are using handles, aliases and temporary phone# to hide who and what we do.

Most people are lying about who they are in this industry.

You guys just continue to disappointment on all levels. No, he not only said that he wanted to keep his real life info a secret. He originally posted on this thread trying to give advice on how to create a fake alias to get out of a black list. He then went on to discuss how he manipulates new providers in the business. And last but not least on another thread he called providers sluts, but I guess that is also OK, because *he* thinks it is a term of endearment. (It is not.)  
I am very familiar with the psychological term psychopath, obviously you are not:  
Psychopathy is a condition characterized by the absence of empathy and the blunting of other affective states. Callousness, detachment, and a lack of empathy enable psychopaths to be highly manipulative.
And once again I need to remind all of you that this board is PUBLIC. Every time I work with a politician or the anti sex work/sex trafficking groups they without fail bring up posting like this that you guys continue to put on display on the review boards and reddit as to why sex work is dangerous and should remain illegal.  
No, I will not curb my anger and you need to check your indifference.  

I think when approaching any new provider you intend to see. Don't mention anything other than your intention to see her/them, and say youre ok paying the deposit required. I think nowadays a lot of providers will take you seriously when you pay the deposit as it has become sort of the industry standard for new appts. If a hobbyist tells you different, its simply because theyre old school and refuse to accept the new reality. Good luck in your adventures.

I do pick new girls every week.  At least I try to if available.   Isn’t that the point?  It’s like ordering food.  You sound like a jilted wife not a sex worker.  What a buzz kill.   And on the whole most girls getting paid for sex know men are paying for the fantasy and convenience.  Not to hear about your personal life and struggles.  I just want to cum in their mouth and leave.  And I pay them to be able to do that.  You are on some crusade and you are acting like you don’t even like men.  Literally the guy that just wants to pay you for sex and leave you call a psychopath.  Just because I don’t want you to know my real name?  Plenty of girls don’t care as long as I pay them and they can get a reference for me.  

A lot of the girls I’ve seen like to be called a slut.  I just saw a very established well know girl that provides in NYC and LA and she told me she is my filthy piss, anal and cum slut.  And that she will be a good slut and drink my piss and cum after I fuck her in her ass like a filthy whore.  Or do you feel other women are also bad for this industry who act like this?  Are you the judge on acceptable behavior?  Only your wishes matter?  We should all accept your words as the right way to interact in the sex trade?  

Apparently the fact that I use my hobby alias to fuck new girls and I pay them money is preying on them.  She seems to want to run a credit check on me.  I’m not applying for a loan I’m fucking whores.  

He will be just fine.

That's all I ever use and have had no issues over the years.  

Same here...I have never used my real number.

With the burner app you can get a verified number that can be used for 2fa on bank accounts etc.  i don’t think people can tell it’s an app number.  

I'm no expert on this and I'm sure that number portability has changed things a lot, but ...
.
- 50+ years ago, all of the numbers belonged to Ma Bell (ATT) and the Baby Bells (NY Tel, New England Tel, LA Tel, ...).
- In the early days of new phone companies, big blocks of numbers were assigned to or registered to a specific company. If your # was AreaCode-Exchange-1234 it was Mobile Company A but if it was AreaCode-Exchange-6789, the system and lookup services knew that that was from a block assigned to Mobile Company B.
- When the owner of -1234 switched to Mobile Carrier E and then Mobil Carrier Q and then, finally, gave up the number. Now, -1234 was up for grabs and maybe some local land-line company grabbed it to assign a new customer of theirs.
.
These days, I have no idea how it works. There's a giant pool of 10 billion numbers (999-999-9999 = 9,999,999,999 = 10 billion) and valid service providers grab one when they need it?  
.
Sorry for the rambling. I'll just repeat, these days, I have no idea how it works.

Yes you can tell, most if not all app numbers AFAIK are checkable.

Courtesy of my bro chunking,

ladies posting on this board have remarked what a slut they are, and they get a ton of business.  Some consider it a badge of honor knowing that there are many men who like a provider who acts kind of slutty, while other providers who have much more time on their hands to be on the boards because they have fewer customers consider it denigrating.  I support each lady's own decision to decide how she wants to present herself and how busy she wants to be.  

The thing is.   You would never know if you have even seen me.   lol.  And yes I am a wonderful client.  I pay.  Do not haggle.  Respect your time.  And then I don’t bother you other than book again.  

I agree.   Love them sluts most.  

WHORE  

That was supposed to be a pic of Norm MacDonald doing Telly Savalas as Kojak shouting "She was a hooka!"

In the sense that it is almost always meant here I am highly confident in saying Lopaw is not a whore.  

Not you.  You are a prime piece of ass.  Grade A.  

because she hobbies in SoCal like me.  We like the same kinds of girls and have compared notes by PM on occasion.  I don't think she compromises on anything.  Financially, my impression is that she could see a lot more providers than she does if she wanted to.  I trust her word completely.  There is nothing whorish about her that I know of.  

What on earth did I miss here?  

I mentioned your name because it was very clear that you don't take money for sex so would be an example of a woman on TER that could not be called a whore in the context of the most common interpretation of that word in these forums.

No offense taken👍

As her handle implies, she was bi-, not gay like lopaw. She was also very proud to be an insatiable slut. And I can certify that from personal experience. I miss her.

She was at the Vegas M&G that Mikey organized way back when that we were both at.

I've heard others mention her, and I regret that she was here I think before my time and I never got a chance to chat with her. They're so few of us around (or at least that post online) it's always fun to find another female monger that enjoys the hobby as much as I do.

It's only a ridiculous take if you haven't experienced it.

Change from your sinful ways, and promise not to be cheap and disrespectful  ; showing up late for your dates and overstating your time. Pay the provider before the date starts and tip her after the session instead of  running off. Don't be a no call no show, and honor the agreement. Amen,