I have a question for guys and the ladies,I contacted this provider who wants a deposit up front she said it’s to make sure I am serious and I will show up also she asked for my phone number but I can only contact her through email now maybe once I give her my phone number she might give me hers but I don’t know if I should take a chance so what do the guys and ladies on this thread think?

Is she well reviewed?  Normally I wouldn't give a deposit just because there are other options out there.   I certainly wouldn't give a deposit for someone with no or bad reviews.

I would tell her that if she wants know if you're serious, how about you showing her your boner when you first get there?  That should convince her you're serious.  

She's using your phone number for screening purposes. Does she have a website? Is she on twitter? Is she reputable? Reviews? Multiple ads? Were you screened with any info other than your phone number?

Once she has your money... for no work... what makes you think the date would ever happen?  Do you have SUCKER printed on your forehead?  This is a huge RED FLAG!  If you even have to ask, the answer is NO!    

Had to think about this........NO !  

I had too many providers who flaked on me so deposit for me would be a high risk requirement.

For example, she has to buy plane tickets and/or get a hotel room.

She Do you have 4 reviews but they not stellar reviews and she charge 500.00...thanks everybody for your feedback I will not be seeing her!!

Doesn't matter how reputable they are!

SCAM..

a good reputation, website, (paid), twitter, enough website history, reviews, ads in different places... i don't see the issue. I request deposit few times. Specially when the person making the booking has history of NCNS in the past with other ladies or for clients that don't have any reference. Just to cover myself in case since I don't see multiple people in a day and I would loose the entire incall money. (at least enough to cover the incall I guess).  

Deposit is crazy talk. No need to pay, your inviting risk. Easy to find a SW that do not require the one . IMHO

4 or more hours for hobbyists are are new to the provider.  

Never ever send a deposit.  I was seeing Ruby for a very long time.  I was tipping her good.  When I was out of town for the Christmas holiday, she call and said that she lost money when she was trying to make a deposit in the ATM and that she needed to pay rent.  Then, it was another excuse, I sent more money.  When I returned, she agreed to go to our usual spot, she never showed 2 days in the row, but she kept asking for money.  She even wanted me to pay-off her furniture bill.  I did at first, she was suppose to meet me and didn't show.  When I was calling and texting, boyfriend/pimp chimed in and told me to stop calling his girl.  So, I called the company and refunded my payment.  Come the find out, the furniture was in her boyfriend/pimps name.  

Sounds like running off with deposits has reached epidemic proportions. Check the Boston board, there are a few of the same instances

on her tits.

In my years doing this, I've never been asked for a deposit. In fact, I just recently saw a profile where she was asking for a deposit. The ad was up for 3 days then gone.  

That being said, if provider is well known, AND I know her already I might consider a deposit for a multi day and/or vacation together trip for her locking in a planned number of days.  But never for a 1-3 hr rendevous with someone I don't know.  Its just asking to get ripped off.

have had bad experiences with deposits. Some ladies won't book at all without a deposit due to where they are in life (child care, pet sitters etc.) so they need to make sure their time isn't wasted. These ladies have been around, are reputable and seem to be thriving. There are other ladies like myself who require deposits after a certain amount of hours (mine is anything over 2hrs) that have never had a problem. You have all chimed in about the lady being reputable before considering so I won't beat that dead horse but I will say that there is risk on both sides. Sometimes we have regular clients that we trust and have seen for long periods of time that decide not to show. If you didn't ask for a deposit and only booked the incall for that one encounter you're just as screwed. At the end of the day, be safe, be mindful and continue to do what works best for you.

...and that is so rare as to be possibly 2x in 25 years.  Due to illness of me or a family member.  The providers always made out better in the end.  Never gave them deposits and saw them multiple times afterwards.  I made good.

Many clients do just as you have done in that scenario but you know that saying about the apples...

in 7 years and over 100 sessions. all between 2 and 5 hours with high end  ladies.

but like you say about the apples...... lol

distill the discussion down to the basics of why we are all here.  Lol

I have learned my lesson!! Read my post Ripoffs and Reviews.

Second that motion

I have north of $15k in deposits right now with a bunch of providers.  Most of my appointments are 100% prepaid.  
 Normal for me.  I've had one provider no show with a deposit--she made good on it, in a big way, when she came back to town.  In the past year, I've booked one appointment for which I had never seen the provider and she didn't ask for a deposit, and guess what?  She didn't show up.  An hour's wasted time for me.

In all the years, and all the time that I have ask ladies to meet me in other cities, I have NEVER been asked for a deposit, till today. It's not in my nature to give a deposit. It's a "potential" risk that I rather not take. She could cancels, or something comes up on my end, the list goes on, so trying to collect or reschedule is a pain.  
But she asked for the deposit, 50% down and I said it's not in me, she understood so we decided to skip the meet...oh well.
And what made it more iffy was that she wasn't reviewed, but I knew of her where others may not.

I don’t pay deposits, but I have voluntarily paid providers full price for the scheduled session when I had to cancel last minute.  

Did it once---got burned---never ever again!!

I have required a deposit to book for the last 7 years.  The majority of my clients pay in  prior to the play date.  I am honest & reputable. I believe because this is my hobby too I value my playtime more. I have never wasted my time, or had my time wasted. To each their own. For all those who will not supply a deposit that is your choice. I honestly feel that deposits for high end & reputable providers will become the norm in the near future. If the provider has done you dirty post who she is to warn your fellow hobbyists. Sharing is caring.

He just wants to get attention by whining and looking like a victim!

The OP is making that less likely, not more likely by letting her get away with it.

You have learned absolutely nothing from reading the feedback from the CUSTOMERS here.  You should have posted this on the PO board where your potential customers who DON'T consider themselves time-wasters would not have seen it.  

Read my “Tampa Warning” post on the Florida board. I have learned my lesson. The only time I wasted, was seeing this provider a minimum of 6 times prior to being ripped off. This provider earned close to 10k over multiple visits just to take me for close to 2k for what was to be a multi day get together. I don’t care how well reviewed a provider is, or now, that I have even met with them before, I will not advance money.

I have seen several very high priced providers.  Meaning two hours for $1400-$1500.  None of them required a deposit.  No way I would send money to someone I've never met.  If they are that uncomfortable with you, you don't want to see them regardless how attractive they are.  Not worth the risk.

we both have our own way of looking at it, but the difference is that I am the customer.  There is competition for my money.  If some providers want to have one-size-fits-all policies, then many times those policies will take her out of the running for any of my hobby money.  My policy is fair-minded to both sides and imposes the same penalty for either side cancelling last minute.  Most providers want a one-way street on last-minute cancellations, so they miss out on my business.  They can agree to reciprocity, or else waive the deposit requirement, so they still have a reasonable choice about getting my business.  

Yes!! Too many clients will reserve an extended period of time and then cancel when we could've reserved that time for someone else that wouldn't cancel. I only ask for deposits anything over 2hrs.  Ive never cancelled on anyone sending deposits, but I note on my website, if I cancel you will receive a refund. If you cancel, it's nonrefundable. I've never once had a problem. I also do a ton of weekend dates and "flymetoyou" dates and always ask for a deposit for this! If a lady kept your deposit money without seeing you, you can simply write her a review for essentially stealing your money.

-- Modified on 1/16/2018 1:17:36 PM

According to TER rules, a client can not write a review of a meeting that didn’t happen . If she runs off with a deposit, you can’t review it . One of the reasons it happens more than you think. I’m glad deposits work for you tho.

You are correct - you cannot write a review.  

By reciprocity, I'm not talking about merely refunding my money (that was already my money to begin with) if she cancels, I'm talking about paying me a like amount for being the damaged party, the SAME as she would get (keeping my deposit) if I cancelled last minute.  

Don't do it!

Your words “ Anyone who would keep a deposit is a LITTLE suspect “ a little ? How about a straight up thief ? Additionally, not one post by a gent here is asking a gal that request  a deposit to change her MO. When we see that, we just simply turn the page. The only 100 % way to guarantee a deposit not being ripped off is to not give one . Thus endth the lesson......

of this conversation is! The people who think they are "buying" pussy and the people who are interested in a person and the experience as a whole. There is no pussy worth reserving. You are absolutely correct. But they are lots of people interested in spending time with me and my colleagues as a people and they're willing to do what is necessary to make that happen.

It is happening and by providers ,  check the boards if you need more background. There are 4 cases of the issue on the Boston boards specifically. They get away with it because you can’t review a NCNS.  There is no “better business bureau” to report them to. Providers have all the gents RLI and men are hesitant to call them out for fear of backlash from the woman. Amount of Revenue has no bearing on a SW ability to operate without the best intentions. If you believe deposits are “ run of the mill “ i believe the number of posts you see here contradict that assertation.  The clients that are against deposits are not because they are going to flake it’s the concern that the provider will.  Scaring away customers is your right to do as  it’s your business. However I don’t believe you are scaring clients away by asking for deposits, your business model doesn’t match up with some men and they spend their money elsewhere. Sounds like a win win for all ? Literally.....

They are shouting  - DON'T BE STUPID, DON'T DO DEPOSITS!

Hi, Why do providers ask for deposits? Because collectively as an "employer" the Hive of hobbiests will leave you stranded. One could have a stack of appointments that all cancel. Then what?  
When we cancel on you, you have to rub one out
When you cancel on us we are unemployed.  
There is no comparison, they are not the same, the severity, gravity of the situation is simply not comparable.  
When someone bad mouths a client, they get butt hurt
When someone bad mouths a provider it can severely impact their livelihood.  

Probably one of the most one sided and ridiculous statements I’ve heard. To paraphrase, you are indicating your time is more valuable than your clients. How about the gentleman who is paid by the hour or a day and the SW ncns flakes etc ?  He doesn’t get burnt ? Seriously?  Not one post on this thread is requesting providers change the strategy on deposits. Run your business as you see fit do what’s best for you. The client will purchase goods and services in a way that they feel comfortable.

Your comprehension of my statement is false.  
I am not stating that. I am stating that the time that is spoken of, the appointment where one person is buying and one person is selling. In that transaction, the loss of a cancellation is different.  
This is hard stuff, I know. It's easier to lay a huge toxic blanket of falsely fueled contempt to start a false narrative. But what YOU said is not what I said. Don't get it twisted

What a condescending post!  To quote: " Those who are incapable of nuanced thinking . . ."  And maybe a little paranoid, eh? "feels like a coordinated DOS of NCNS . . ."

Both of you are flipping out. Calm down. Discrediting me is expected. Reading more into what I said, twisting it, damning me, making me out to be the absolute craziest hooker on earth, infusing your meaning into my words, your story will become the narrative for it, good on ya.  

It’s EXACTLY what you said ! And you said it again, when you tried to explain you didn’t say it . SMH . You say the “loss of the cancellation is different.” ? How ? Please enlighten us . No need to twist , your words paint a accurate picture.

So, In my post, I attack no one. Your post is almost 100% character assassination which is apparently not against TOS, so OK.  

Go to home depot and by yourself a shovel. It’s going to be easier to dig this hole younput yourself in.

This one crazy pregnant lady wanted a deposit for her services. Yeah no, fuck giving you money before I even meet you, that's all kinds of stupid.

but I can't think of a single reason to take it.

Yes, that's what they're called . . . . . "fuck deposits."   You pay in advance for the fucking.  If she doesn't show, you get an even more intense fucking.

This is a lot of anger my friend, directed toward me for no reason. That's objectification, denigration, black and white thinking. You would not be able to say any of that to my face. You'd feel foolish and ashamed. This is the point I am trying to make. The way we conduct ourselves toward each other matters. It matters that you are talking like this to me. Were you to meet me I don't think that would flow so easily.  

Unbunch your big-girl panties there Lorena!  You are irrational, paranoid, and as jaded and cynical as I have ever seen.  Dumb too.  Don't fool yourself, I would be quite comfortable saying this to your face, but it won't happen - I see a different caliber of lady.

None of these women are thieves, until they are. When "well reviewed" providers rip off their clients, and their are simply too many instances of this happening for any reasonable person to deny it happens", its the honest providers who suffer.

At least, you will have the satisfaction flushing money down the toilet!!

First of all, the emails don't come through TER anymore, I didn't say they don't come at all.  

and I apologize for my part in making things worse for you.

I guess in a way I do feel sorry for her, but not enough to listen to her bullshit.

You're hiding behind an alias to say this to me, big guy. For every guy ut there who used this thread to decide not to see me, that is a whole bunch of time saved for me. This is a great way to scrub the pipeline. I don't need anyone in my life, client or otherwise, who in their actual life thinks like you do. THis may come as a real shock to you but shhhh ( I don't want all the guys to like me).  

After I realized you were clueless suggesting he’s hiding behind an alias, like me...

“banned from blogging for life on another site”

yes, my 'problem' is not being easily intimidated or controlled. It's only problematic if that's you goal. I was banned for life for basically calling out bullies online. IS that a problem? Only if you want people who support or are free range assholes on the internet as clients.  

Don’t get me wrong - I do /not/ agree with her about deposits; I personally would NEVER pay a deposit.

Already I think we need a reminder that I did not steal anyone's money but i  get to feel like I did and I'll be treated like I did. That is the crux.  

Is when someone has no called/no showed before and wants another chance, or someone who habitually cancels appts. I think its fair in that instance, we can only afford to have so much of our time wasted.

For a long appointment like overnight or 24 hours.  

but like you none of those situations are ever going to apply to me.

I can't think of any opinion ever posted by an escort here that would matter about whether I'd see her or not.

Speaking of "miss banned for life" can you imagine anyone witnessing her melt down thinking to themselves "Damn, I think I would like to meet her" ROFLMFA

mind-numbing, sewage-filled threads most of the time, but always keep in mind that the vocal minority on these boards is just that: a minority. They talk a lot of shit and have a lot of free time. Your target audience doesn't. Engage where it benefits you and utilize this board to your advantage, but don't let literally anything they say affect you even when it's couched as advice. They can speak from their point of view, but very rarely is their insight valuable enough or nuanced enough to be useful.

Not that I can recall. I appreciate honesty. Many escorts do it for the money, not because they're wet for me. I arrive clean and mannered with the agreed amount. What they actually think of me doesn't enter into it. I'd be more demanding of a girlfriend in that regard. If she doesn't really like me she's in a position to do damage. Pros just want the money without the hassle. I don't give them a reason to be concerned. Everybody's happy.

I didn't survive all the bullshit Ive survived to have some twisted up fucknut try to give me and my business a bad name. for no reason whatsoever. None.  

I Cant' imagine anyone witnessing this and thinking it is a melt down.

You know nothing of what you speak and don't have ANY FUCKING IDEA whether the anti-deposit crowd is a majority or a minority.  They sure seem like a majority here.  You have made that nonsensical claim before with zero proof.

because you are VERY wrong.

just as it is important to you!  

The idea that you as a guy who refuses to do deposits knows more about the subject than me, a provider who gets deposits, is HILARIOUS.

Honestly, I kinda like her; she’s got spirit and comes out swingin’.  Her TER profile and site certainly intrigue me.

Some providers steal deposits . READ the posts, it happens. It’s on a current twitter convo as well and this from a fellow SW! Once again you can not review a NCNS who  runs off with a deposit. There is no or little recourse . You claim If she runs off with a deposit she Shuts her business down ? Please that’s ridiculous. No one here is saying “CHANGE YOUR POLICY “ . if it works for you great. The mast majority of the men here are simply saying deposits are not something they are comfortable with and if a provider requires one they are not considered a good match for the clients money .

I make it a priority for reservations and sending of deposits to be simple with me.  

Well, my promotion, not offered through TER for obvious reasons, is for prepaying sessions is just fine, I will likely have reached m goal to have enough to get an apartment in a couple weeks.  

Of course I am worth your time or you wouldn't have replied!  A scrap kinda turns you on?  Cmon, admit it . . .

Why thank you, Sir.  

because you are going to worship his White Knight cock for free!

thanks for the recap!  

exactly. He probably gets free pussy all the time. Take a page from his playbook, Sunshine.

Clients know why SW ask for deposits. No need to explain to most . and I think most are savvy enough to contact well reviewed and established providers. THat who is sometines taking the deposits when the opportunity arises. Please don’t think because the girl has reviews and a website she is insulted from making bad choices . Really ? AGAIN... Read the posts educate yourself  to the issue. Go on Twitter etc. your wrong again ... they don’t disappear , they go on merrily because they can because there is no recourse .  THey only sure why do not get a deposit stolen is to not give one . You can’t argue intelligently against that.

He doesn’t have 170 to fly to California? The entire trip wouldn’t cost 500..

I hear you specialty is "Psycho Bitch Sex"

No one here is saying “CHANGE YOUR POLICY “ .  
Yes, you are saying no one should give deposits, they are a chump if they do.  
Is there a difference?
The vast majority of men are not saying that. Most of them aren't saying anything, least of all coping to sending deposits.  
SOME providers steal deposits but reading these posts you'd think we all do, most do and a rare few do not. THat's a gross misrepresentation.

Don't be a fool!

The consensus is for the PROVIDER to not change their policy , not referring to the client. To answer your question, yes there is a difference . “ most of them aren’t saying anything “? Huh . Again, read. If you feel that “ all providers steal deposits “ that is your  interpretation of the posts. I can’t advise you how to interpert what clients post . I’m glad to see that you admit that providers steal deposits. Once again if deposits work for you which I’m sure they do that is your right. As it the right of the client to not consider spending money on those that require such.Based on that I believe men are getting there dicks sucked by women who do not require deposits.

Are losers . . .  

You're so childish. Whack off to my chaturbate if you're lonely. I'm going on at 9 or so. Men that pay for sex with me are winners. Winning!!! No, I didn't imply anything I'm stating emphatically that you are a loser. I don't assign that attribute to all the clients just ones like you.

not all clients know why providers ask for deposits, and my post is directed to them.  

is like being called ugly by a frog!

Yeah no fuck deposits. Hookers can try and justify it all they want but at the end of the day it's an awesome way to fuck over a hobbyist by stealing his money and ignoring him afterwards. Yeah there are logical reasons why a provider shouldn't fuck a hobbyist over, but then again some do it anyway so clearly some of these girls don't care about what's logical and sensible. Fuck that, deposits are stupid, no hobbyist with a brain should ever agree to one.

Sweet bang away! Lol

My website states that I require a deposit for appts longer than 3 hrs...so, I MOSTLY agree with your response.

I just really hope everything turns out alright for you; I hope things turn your way.

You just sound mean.

You started out with “ providers who steal deposits will have to shut their business down “ . You have since softened that stance which shows you are open to constructive dialogue. I do agree the more well established providers will enhance the ability of having no issues with deposits . Just look at a few posts above you a provider demanded a 500 deposit, she canceled , and is paying back the client dribs and drabs , it appears 50 at a time. Who wants to go through that ? Great he’s getting his deposit back ( eventually ), but again shows many ways deposits can be problematic.Your statement “women who do not get deposits think men don’t value her time.”is quizzical?  How about me paying her 600 a hour isn’t that value enough.

Why bother with you?  

For managing his $500.00   WTF  Paying him back on installment plan.  Try that with a hooker, guarantee you will hit a whole lot  of DNS lists.

This is a shining example of how to lighten up a thread while not coming across as a complete dick. You did justice to sarcastic humor.

On any occasion that I have to reschedule an appt unexpectedly, I always offer 30min-2hr additional time *gratis* when we are able to reschedule the appt. This is regardless whether there was a deposit paid or not. The amount of additional time I offer takes a few things into consideration such as the length of their original booking, precisely how offensively "last minute" my cancellation/reschedule request was, and the ease with which we are able to reschedule (i.e. whether they are local or visiting or if it occurs while I am touring and how soon I will be back in their area).

I keep it real simple.  Deposit  equates to a  MUST SEE  hooker.  And that simply does not exists  with me.    

I ask for a deposit for a multi-hour and consider it a confirm date if it’s a session scheduled several weeks or days when booked. If a client refuses a screening doesn’t have TER, P411, or refuses a more thorough screening...I’ll ask for a deposit. If the client has a history of NCNS. I will require a deposit. Anonymity is definitely something I try to respect but I can not be hanging on the string of a promise only to be stood up.

“I can not be hanging on the string of a promise only to be stood up “ .. great strategy and clients that do not send deposit money feel the same.

How did that become a thing?
Yeahi if you read my posts you would also note that I agree with you 100% that's a bullshit situation that is not my norm I typically would not spend said deposit until services are rendered. I'm not going to look it up but it's somewhere. Due to circumstances already described.  
I'm not saying be a shmuck and just do whatever. Research the people you're going to give your money to, before during or after.  
This gentleman took a long time to pick a provider and chose well. While he's getting it in dribs and drabs, he's also  quite understanding and compassionate.  
Did you mean 'pay' interest because at least that makes sense

are for chumps!

I just had a client give me a deposit and I completely followed through. I am not sure why giving a deposit makes you think that the provider isn't going to show up. I mean come on. If we don't show up that looks bad on us. Then we are out a potential client that maybe great. How is this benefiting the provider to just take someone's money? If she is reputable, has a website, has different ads posted she is not going to try and screw you for a deposit. In the end she is the only one that will lose for a little bit of money. Think about it.

“ in the end she is the ONLY one that will lose for a little bit of money ?” HUH, WHAT ? How about the gent who is out the 500 deposit if she flakes NCNS etc ?  No one is saying giving a deposit means she will not show up. But if she doesn’t, chances are client will have a issue on his hands .” Looks bad on you “ ?of course but the recourse from the clients point of view is limited .Can’t review. Oh, maybe go to the BBB, LOL?  You you may have a potential client that may be great , but we all know SOME SW  don’t need the extra clients and are banking so much the point is moot. Look here’s the reality, educate yourself, look on the posts and on twitter . SW who are all the things you have said (reputable website etc )HAVE walked off with deposits. IT HAPPENS,  And more than you think . OMG there’s a post of a SW on the very thread got a 500 deposit canceled the meet and spent it , and is now paying the guy on a installment  plan. So I DID think about and so have the 90% of the gents on this topic . I’m glad the deposits work out for you tho.

The payments will become erratic quickly and cease in short order.

Those on the bus ride , may very well find themselves in this situation.  

On the other hand if a hobbyist doesn't give a provider a deposit, he won't get stuck in a situation where she might ditch him and keep the money. No, she won't take a reputation hit(the guy will most likely never post about it) and even if she loses a client so what? She still has some money, and maybe she'll just tell herself she won't do it again and move on, but she keeps the money either way and the guy loses out. I can see why some providers would be ok with this, maybe they want to see some hobbyists get screwed over, like a pro-feminist "fuck the patriarchy" thing, but that doesn't help the guy out at all.  

It’s interesting that the providers who give their opinion on the matter kinda slink away from the topic once it’s understood that deposits are a unessacary risk from a clients POV. If the deposit system works for them , may God bless.

Read an article about a provider, former porn start, who did that to another bloke.. I spoke to her and she assured me it was because of the client..well, fell for the same pennywhistle and was out over $800 USD .. kept receiving excuses why she couldn't get a date going and got offended when I asked if it was just a scam (false pride).

And all three times they've worked out in my favor.

It's different exactly in the way she said. Blue balls vs. Bills not being paid. What do you lose if you get cancelled on? Will you be late on your bills or not be able to buy groceries. You realize this is our livelihood right? I require deposits from ANY new client because I had 3 cancellations in one night (2 cancelled and 1 was a fake) that is literally my rent money right there gone.

You're such a royal dick I had to reply and let you know that he is paid off,  and was in talks with me about another trip before I was even done paying him off. Will he?

Unfortunately for you, you make a great argument AGAINST ever giving a provider a deposit. I am sure most of the women on this thread who ask for deposits are reading your posts, shaking their heads, and hoping beyond hope that you would just STFU. lmao.

I don't see the need for a deposit for a one hour session. When you get into multiple hours or overnights, I understand.  

That is your pissy interpretation.  
I said it before but I will say it again so your shitty narrative isn't the only voice in the echo chamber that is this cesspool of idiocy, I would never NORMALLY take a deposit I couldn't hold in escrow until the work was done. That I did so and paid it back is the story,  

I've never seen a woman ask for only $40 as a deposit. Sounds like lowest common denominator backpages activity

You're 47??? Shit girl you need to pay me..