The first is that it is really important for me that the ladies I see be safe and FEEL safe. So if giving them my name fixes that -- no problem. I try to book ethical women anyway; so I don't worry about it.
The second is that I know how the game of provider telephone works. You probably COULD verify me just from my first name.
I know this because a few months ago I went to book a lady. All she had was my first name and email address. (I have no white listings.) Two hours later I get a call from another lady I've seen (but have never reviewed) about that booking.
If you wanted, if I told any provider anywhere, you could probably discover what I had for breakfast.
So, essentially, I realize giving you my real name would really just be pro-forma.
To our dear mods... if you think this post is offensive, please feel to pull it down. I have the proof regarding all what I'm saying here.
Some of this is my mistake, I admit, but I'm just speechless on how can a hobbyist be this stupid and irresponsible. The person I'm talking about is a VIP member here named tagger7.
Here is the story.
I currently live in Dubai, where there are no TER reviews, etc. So hobbying is kind of a hit or miss game.
Recently, I've seen an ad for a british provider touring in Dubai. Obviously, no reviews on TER, but she has plenty of good reviews on other sites, so I took the chance. Long story short, we ended up being not compatible and there was no chemistry, so the experience was a pretty bad one. I wrote a bad review about it, and I found out later on that tagger7 forwarded the review in his unsolicited "introductory" email to the lady as a reason why he doesn't want to see her! (yeah, you read that right... wtf?!!).
No issues till here. I get an angry email from her (I didn't know about tagger7 at this point), and I removed the review in exchange of keeping my private info private, and thought that this chapter was over.
Before the review was removed, tagger7 PM'ed me asking about her, and I frankly told him it was a bad experience, and elaborated on few points he asked about (yep, my mistake that I've replied to him). The dickless coward forwarded my PM to her in another unsolicited email as a follow up to his unsolicited introductory email (I have all these emails btw), telling her why he still doesn't want to see her... yep... again... you've read that right...
Now I have to deal with a really angry lady and I'm running at a real risk that my private info would be posted on her blog, cause she thinks I lied to her and I posted the review on another site, which I didn't.
I sent that tagger7 a nice email (yeah... I got his email address from the provider) telling him exactly what I think about him, but I doubt he will reply back.
I hope this is going to end in a good way, but at least I've learned few lessons. Don't reply to a PM from another hobbyist and don't share your personal info with a provider
give your real name, employment or other personal information to a provider. Period.
I understand compeletely why some providers want this information - it gives them recourse to you if you misbehave, and it gives them a meaningful way to warn other providers about you if needed.
Completely understand.
But there are too many stories out there like this gentleman's. As long as an admitted minority of providers are going to be able to get away with outing or even threatening to out hobbyists because of anything less than robbery or violence, you are not getting my personal info. I say this with all due respect to the point of view of the ladies I will not be seeing as a result.
There are plenty of providers who are willing to see a gentleman on the basis of his review board history and membership in screening sites like preferred411 and date-check. I for one will gladly limit myself to seeing those providers whose screening requirements match my privacy needs.
There are many good providers who will not see you unless they get personal information; and the providers who will see you without that are the ones who are unsafe and therefore more problematic.
The problem I see here is that a review should not rely, at least not soley, on whether your chemistry clicks or not with the provider, but rather her performance and appearance. After all, she may well click with some other client's chemistry, so why not give the benefit of the doubt?
Beyond that, it is clear that being careless in how you backchannel someone is going to end up making things blow up in your face. That's something we should have learned in jr. high.
to the effect that (quoting) "providers who will see you without that (referring to personal information) are the ones who are unsafe and therefore more problematic.
Nonsense.
I have seen many of the top providers in several markets without providing my personal information. Many of the most highly rated ladies on TER are quite content with board handle and screening site information for screening purposes.
Like all generalizations, asserting that all providers who do not require personal information are unsafe falls of its own weight.
Conversely, there are quite a few providers who do require personal information who have a checkered track record with respect to quality of service and being excessively dramatic.
Let's agree not to make blanket statements on this important issue.
Nevertheless, a gal has to choose screening that she feels is right for her. If she is not comfortable with something, then how can she do her job well?
As clients, we are free to do as we want, and for the same reason.
There's no real right or wrong to one side or the other, just shades of gray.
that I understood the reasons why some providers want this information. Reasons - not trivial reasons and not whims. I get it.
However, their *needs* are not consistent with mine.
I never complain about a lady's screening requirements. I don't debate them or attempt to get around them. If they do not match my own needs I pass them by. And see many very highly rated providers who do not feel the need for my personal info because of my extensive hobby credentials.
She's threatening to out him over his review!! How in the hell can you whiteknight that? Talk about a pathetic statement. And take your fucking chemistry bullshit somewhere else too. Her photos were deceptive and she was a horrible fuck. She lacks professionalism.
BTW, I do not give my personal information to providers, and have no difficulty getting arrangements made with well reviewed providers. Saying they are unsafe is more bullshit.
You and I have never seen eye-to-eye. But when you start in on mrfisher? Oh yeah! Now you have a fucking problem!
I take what mrfisher says as gospel. I TALK with him. Constantly. He and I have, and will, see the same ladies.
He and LP have taught me more about the hobby, shit, life, than I ever knew. And I've seen some fucked up shit before I came on here.
So if you fucking have a problem with mrfisher, you come thru me first!
And another fucking thing, wise-ass. Many providers have my personal shit. I talk with them DAILY!
Just sent the one's that have kids 'Happy Mother's Day' texts, telling them how wonderful they are and shit!
Just got off the phone with one that called to say thanks for the note. Told me what she's doing today for the occasion and every little thing.
Fuck! You talk about chemistry? I just got back from the best vacation of my LIFE in Vegas because of the chemistry I have with the 3 ladies I saw when I was there. They fucking TOLD me to come see them. 2 of them are coming thru MY city during their tours and I'm fucking there.
Same thing with mrfisher. Ladies are going thru Boston and made it a point to make sure he knows about it. Why? Because he's the fucking coolest mother-fucker and the ladies love his ass!
Can you say that? FUCK NO!!!
Have a great day, you.
I have a date today in a few hours and I'm gonna try and cool down before I go.
Agree 100% and it sounds like I need to add you to my list of posters to read. I already had MrFischer on that list.
Completely serious about this. There are many different kinds of guys here and finding the ones who see things the same way as I do is vital to me. They tend to like and not like the same providers, places, etc.
I had to be more civil in my reply to Ego but you post came a lot closer to what I actually felt.
Nevertheless, I never defended the provider in question. It goes without saying that such behavior is grounds for bannishment.
As for her photos and performance, read the OP's review of her. Other than the chemistry thing, it sounds like a pretty good session, especially for those who like Greek.
Someone posts something you disagree with and the "WK" slur comes out. Why not focus on the topic and leave the flaiming name calling alone.
This touched a nerve with you. Why? You seem to know a lot of "facts" about the incident that were not in the OP.
MrF's point was not defending what she did but some reasonable self protection for a reviewer.
In my mind it again says don't invest that much time and $$ on someone you have never met. And why Tagger7 felt the need mention another guy to tell this provider he wasn't going to see her. If he remains decent in his dealings with her this doesn't blow up.
Certain subjects tend to get me going, and anyone being threatened physically or by being outed in the hobby is going to bring out my dark side. I don't like excuses and useless explanations for that type of bad behavior either.
Yes, I was hard on mrfisher due to my interpretation of his initial reply. mrfisher also takes his lumps like a man, and does not take all of this too seriously.
BTW, I love kittens and all animals as long as they are not drunk 24/7 and are not a danger to civilized society.
I do not see how a provider would travel out of country a 1000+ miles away, especially to the Middle East, without personal info. Just don't think it would be smart.
Lots of blaime but in the way you describe it I think the blaome lies mostly on the other two players.
Would also say this is strong evidence no to do overnights or longer without having met the provider first. Both may be sincere but if the cjemistry is just not there it makes for a long, bad time. Anything over a few hrs has to have chemistry the way I see it.
Sorry all this happened.
PS The really big question I have is for Tagger7. What kind of warped mind sends a provider a letter about why he doesn't want to see her? That is a dumb move. To quote another guy makes it worse than dumb. That is the kind of guy who gives lots of us a bad name.
providing, then you write a review, then she's pissed!!! As I see it, Tagger7 is a minor player in this one. She has some real issues here. Half Assed session, then wants a good review! Doesn't want to mar her reviews, with a bad one, even though she deserves it! Dipshit should have never done that, BUT, the bigger dipshit should be able to blow that kind of shit off! Now you have to worry about her spilling your info all over the net. If she puts one iota of info out about you, I would copy it and paste it all over her home boards (minus your info), and let everyone know how damn dangerous she can be to a guys livlihood! Like I said, tagger7 is an asshole, but she and her ego is the big problem! Lesson learned, I hope, some ladies ask for way more info than needed. Take a pass on them if you don't know them or their reputations. No piece of ass is worth that much trouble!!
Total Freakin' MANGINA is what tagger7 is. This idiot is nothing more than a mere drama queen, and has know clue of what the review process is for. Another perfect example of the feminineization of the male species, world wide. Yes it is dreadful that this exists on both ends with another hobbyist and a provider. Once again another reason some hobbyists are fearful of writing a bad review, due to fear of retribution, this defeats the whole reason behind this service IMHO. The more I learn and talk to other hobbyists it is far more common than we would want to know.
On another note, gentlemen treat the ladies with respect and have excellent personal hygiene. Two big keys to a good time.
The providers should not accept a client when they are not in the "mood" that particular day as the client is paying you good money to put on the total act/show. I am sure it is hard to turn down the money,but ya gotta do what ya gotta do.
Sometimes they guy insists on the session. I once had a guy who I told i could not see him because i just had a fight with my Bf and was in a bad mood. I was actually trying to tell him that I was taking my ads down and taking a vacation because I was not in a position to deal with clients I didn't know hoe to tell guys "NO" period. So I let him in and he got the session after I stopped crying and re did my make up. The sex was really good, amazing even. Then he went on and on about I said stuff about my "recovery" like it was AA or something when it was actually back problems and trying to shuffle my orthopedic appts. and those doctors were making me late or miss alot of business. I was getting overwhelmed and stressed out. So he write that I had grey hair.Trying to say I was an old lady just to try to hurt my business or to be spiteful when HE is the one who insisted on going through with the session. He insisted that I go drink some water and wash my face and do the appt. I was so YOUNG and immature I didn't know how to tell him to get out.
Everyone laughed their asses off. I actually had just had my hair tinted for a show at a club. The tint was so my hair would glow white instead of yellow under black lights. It took a few days to wash out but he tried to say I had grey eyebrows which was just laughable.
They guys never leave , even if they have a hygiene problem they will argue to stay and make a scene. Basically you have to get through a shitty session and take your lumps. I got a bad review from a guy who I was trying to keep from crying or throwing up during the session. I would have loved to send him away but they will argue.
OMG, I just remembered how to get rid of a problem client. I have had amnesia since an accident and had forgotten how to deal with guys who want to argue to stay instead of taking their money and leaving.
I better write it down in so I don't forget again.
First off, while I will agree that they are both "pieces of shit", which is the bigger piece?
Secondly, Taggert, piece of shit that he is, was identified as such. The provider piece of shit is still an unknown to us. In the interest of fairness, if Taggert is going to be "outed" as a piece of shit, so should the unnamed provider.
IMO all providers should put Taggert on their DNS lists and all hobbyist should have the opportunity to put the unnamed provider on their "must miss list". Neither should be trusted with the least amount of personal information.
You had me going with your rhythm and rhyme, so I was expecting at least one more line
Regarding the OP's post, I find it very helpful when fellow hobbyists share their misfortunes, because so many of the rest of us can learn from their experiences, or be reminded of safety issues that we once learned, but forgot. If, each time someone shares his experience is told how stupid he is, pretty soon, no one will speak up. In my view, Tagger and the provider should be exposed for their contemptible behavior. Realistically, I can see where the OP will choose not to do so regarding the provider.
I do think he allowed the other two parties to PLAY him for way too long.
I agree that hobbyists should share misfortune. Isn't that part of the reason we are here? I've enjoyed MANY informative PM'S. They STAY WITH ME. EC'S and Tagger7's should have stayed between the two of them.
Shame on him and her.. You were fine to post a review ..You seem to have great taste in ladies so she must have had really left a bad taste in your mouth.. Shame on that gentleman.. He should have kept your Pm private and kept it simple and to the point with the provider.. BTW.. this is what the discussion board is for.. thank you for feeling safe in the TER community.. Lovely Lorena
I had a website and profile set up to specifically attract guys from the Chicago area and a TER member had seen the other profile and knew it was me. I had a review with a 2 hour session at $500 an hour and this member decided he wanted the same sesion forn $200 under threat of a bad review. So some guys did try to trash that other profile since there were not many reviews on it. I got all kinds of hate mail.lol Guys saying "their are obviously two women operating under the same handle" and on and on. I just ignored it and laughed about it but it made some of my other clients very angry to see me treated like that and one of my clients went after the guy. I was still so busy with making money I didn't care. I had way more clients than I could ever see off 4 different phone numbers. The only time I have had to go hard on a client was when they put too many PERSONAL details in the review. Since they are identifying me I in return may identify them if they do not remove the personal info from their review. They always opt to remove personal and identifying info from the review. I don't ask them to take out anything neg. They wanted to say because that is how it is. If I want to use this forum then I have to let the guy say what he wants even if it is ugly or untrue as long as it does not put me in any danger.
It's fair game. The chips fall where they may but her outing you over "just" a bad review is trifling.
Pussy sells everywhere and this website does not make or break any providers business.
Well... I hope this thread doesn't become another fight. I was upset and needed a place to blow up some steam, that's why I started this thread.
I'm taking most of the blame myself tbh. I should have been more careful with PMs, but I learned my lesson. albeit the hard way.
I'm trying to resolve the issue directly with the provider and I think it is working out, but obviously I cannot be sure. All I can do is just wait and see what will happen next.
You can’t control “bad chemistry” I suppose that could mean a lot of things, but, based just on that I’m not hearing she did anything “wrong”. As in showed up late, or unkempt, or shorted you on time, or was watching television and answering her phone through the session or, in general, did not provide the ‘service’ agreed to.
Based on chemistry you wrote a ‘bad’ review. I don’t know what was in your review, but had you written a fair and ojective review, one would think you clearly stated the lady provided services agreed to, but the two of you just did not mesh on a personal level. This doesn’t mean she is a bad provider or the overall experience for another client would also be bad.
If your gripe was solely about lack of chemistry, I can see why she would be pissed; especially as this review is now coming across to her from another potential client who is using that to justify why he will not see her.
Which first of all is idiotic and secondly, not necessary. Did he already have time scheduled with her and then cancelled based on your review? Or did he, for some strange reason, forward this review over to her and say: “I was gonna see you but, now, after reading this review…..nana-na-na-na…..?”
What if another provider you wanted to see responded to your request to schedule some time by saying “I contacted this other provider you saw recently for a reference, and she said I should not see you because the chemistry between the two of you was so bad?”
That would also be an idiotic thing to do. And, you would be pissed---rightfully so.
So, the problem here does not look to have much to do with this provider, specifically. It has to do with you writing a review based on “bad chemistry” (which, of course, you have a right to do, though....I’m not sure what the point of that would be). The second problem is this other guy using your review as some kind of leverage against this lady.
Now you say: you are “running at a real risk that my private info would be posted on her blog, cause she thinks I lied to her and I posted the review on another site, which I didn't”
Has she actually posted your personal information somewhere?
Or are you just worried? Because, there’s a big difference between being worried about something, and something actually happening. And even if she were to write about this experience in her blog, do you really think she’s going to lead in with:
I met this client the other day—his name is Joe Blow. He lives at 1000 provider street, hobbyland 696969, uses email addy [email protected], and mobile#: 111-222-12234,…..blah, blah…blah........?
I’m not sure why some of you guys keep getting your tighty-whities in such a bunch over providing info to a provider. If there is a lady you want to see, but she requests info you don’t feel comfortable giving her, just move on; it’s a non-starter from the beginning.
There are plenty of other options for you to choose from. And if the info a provider requests, as so many men like to point out is, “hurting her business", she’ll adjust for that. But, seems to me the providers who do request personal info are doing just fine without you……
Well... this is another review of mine where "chemistry" was the only issue, but the experience overall was good (again, this is NOT the review in question):
No matter how pissed she is, she can’t do what you’re worried about without shooting herself in the foot at the same time.
If she’s been around any time at all, she knows as soon as she does, you boys are gonna grab your pitchforks, fire up your torches, and assemble a mob to chase her down publicly, and backchannel.....
The provider and tagger7 are one. Both are pieces of shit.
Second, the OP failed to mention, as he did on the RO board (and I don't believe I am spilling any secret beans here), that the provider was enough older than her photos to be considered B&S.
Third, take your stupid drama elsewhere. This is serious stuff that impacts us all, hobbyists and providers alike.
Now, it takes two assholes to tango, and that includes you Mike. I like ya bro, but sometimes you're just gas on someone elses fire. I did single you out here because you like to offer yourself as a reasonable guy. So be that.
I just could've left the thread well enough alone until I saw mrfisher get bashed. That I don't appreciate.
He is a big boy, and can handle himself quite well.
I've just always been the kinda guy that stuck up for his buddies is all.
Ego_check and I have went rounds before. I'm not proud of it, but it happened and I apologize.
But I have selfish reasons. My boy, mrfisher, was forced to leave this country. And now I have to make preparations to bring him back.
So if he gets arrested. Or shot by an officer. Or hangs himself in his cell. Or gets struck by a bolt of lightning. I'm going to hold some people accountable in this room. And that I do not forgive.
So, that being said, let me say that I won't be the one to break the peace that was made here today.
Your advice was: "Don't reply to a PM from another hobbyist and don't share your personal info with a provider."
I disagree. Let me give what I consider to be better advice although I doubt it will be seriously considered.
Stop picking providers on the basis of superficial attributes such as whether or not she is a "10" has big boobs, fulfills a fetish or has a specific sex act on the menu.
Instead pick providers on the basis of what is really the only thing that matters in the final analysis: character.
And, yes, there ARE ways of ascertaining a lady's character.
As you have just clearly stated that you do not think giving a real name is too personal; is it safe for me to guess that you give all your clients your real name?
Or is it too personal for you but not for them?
I'm not bustin' on you. I know you need the client's real name. But, yes, in a world with asymmetric disclosure; it should be recognized that when he provides it, he IS providing something very personal.
Thankfully, you and the overwhelming majority of providers recognize that fact and would never misuse it!
But it only takes a couple of bad experiences to make a guy very very conservative about his disclosures.
I have the real names of more providers than have mine, yet I freely share mine with any lady that I'm interested in seeing. That's partly because I don't choose with my dick, and partly because I understand that I'm more of a risk to them (physically) than they are to me.
BTW, I include Khori in that list of names, but no, I'm not sharing it, lol.
The first is that it is really important for me that the ladies I see be safe and FEEL safe. So if giving them my name fixes that -- no problem. I try to book ethical women anyway; so I don't worry about it.
The second is that I know how the game of provider telephone works. You probably COULD verify me just from my first name.
I know this because a few months ago I went to book a lady. All she had was my first name and email address. (I have no white listings.) Two hours later I get a call from another lady I've seen (but have never reviewed) about that booking.
If you wanted, if I told any provider anywhere, you could probably discover what I had for breakfast.
So, essentially, I realize giving you my real name would really just be pro-forma.
Unfortunately it looks like your attempt to purchase VIP membership has failed due to your card being declined. Good news is that we have several other payment options that you could try.
VIP MEMBER
, you are now a VIP member!
We thank you for your purchase!
VIP MEMBER
, Thank you for becoming VIP member!
Membership should be activated shortly. You'll receive notification!
