Is asking too much on these lists really tooooo much? Whatever happened to just wanting flowers and chocolates? Now, you have one lady asking for stereo equipment. Another one asking for very expensive perfume. One lady had a mink coat listed on hers NO LIE..LOL  What do men think when they read the ladies wish list? Do they really break down and buy her the things that she has listed?

that no matter how fantastic they look nor how great of reviews thy have, they are self centered bitches and not part of the crowd here on TER for the most part.

I mean it just says gimme, gimme gimme.  And I'm all that.  Well good f'ing luck cuze you aint getting it from me.  I have, and I'll ust this term for this case, "hired" two who had the long lists of pricy stuff.  They weren't anything to write home about, but that didn't matter because they tooted their own horn just fine.  In fact, as I look back on it I think that is the only horn they knew how to toot.

Well, the truth is that many of these ladies have clients who love to give them gifts.  I don't view a "wish list" as anything more than a gentle suggestion...if an item on the list is too rich for my blood, so what?  Some of the items on MY wish list are too rich for the gift-givers in MY life, too.  (Specifically: the BMW M5 Sedan, the schooner-rigged Cherubini 49, and the house overlooking Sunset Cliffs.)

I give my favorite lady gifts, sometimes from her (unpublished) wish list (candles) and sometimes not (I wrote her a song for her birthday and sent her 35 Valentine's cards...one for this year, and one for each Valentine's Day in her life that I missed by not knowing her yet).  

As it's been said, gifts are not expected, but always appreciated.

Yoda

There's a girl in Atlanta who has asked for a brand new motorcycle.

It totally blows my mind that these girls have the audacity to ask for such things and think it's ok. What cracks me up is she has been trying to finish a degree for the last 8 years, is going back to finish it and work on another one at the same time. Oh, did I forget that she's going to get a job and that this is only temporary till she can get these things accomplished. We shouldn't get our hopes up because she's not going to be around for much longer. lmao  You know, I went back to school recently and I happend to know that your credits usually only last for appox 6 years. After that you are back to square one. Hmmmm...

Just my opinion of course...

xoxo
B

-- Modified on 3/20/2004 5:32:20 PM

How can that be topped, 35 valentine's day cards to the same lady, all in one shot!!! May the force be with you as you hobby forward, MasterYoda.

Don't blame the ladies---there's a sucker born every minute.

has nothing to do with money for sex.  For me, it has to do with a women viewing her entire sexuality and physical being as nothing more than a bargaining chip to what life has to offer materialistically.  Those lists cheapen women and I avoid women with the classlessness to list that crap on their website.

Jacksonlips

Where do you see these wishlists?

My sentiments exactly, Jacksonlips.

-- Modified on 3/20/2004 6:29:06 PM

I hate chocolates and flowers. Get me some black and tans and I'll tell you where to hide the salami. I am revising my wish list, and the whole darn website, so put the darn kitchen torch down. Chill. Yeah I hate mink coats too. Tacky is as tacky does. So? Is the coat gonna blow ya? No. So?? Nyah-nyah... :d

I want a Bimota DB1. Or a Monster Ducati with a glitter tank.

How about a Glock 20?

Look, the reason I put a wish list up, is that I don't want trinkets. I don't wan't it to go to waste. Go see the movie "Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind." That's me. Questions? Didn't think so.

Women like those you describe are a turn-off.  They rarely enjoy the sex, asnd generally couldn't care less about the client.

It takes a litle heart to be a good courtesan - a real lady keeps the emotional distance that is necessary, but has the "heart" to have a genuine interest in people.

She is not an "exploiter".

Why do you think a wishlist is called a WISHlist? Most of it's dreaming, that's all it is. I have a wishlist on my site, and no I don't EXPECT someone to buy all that. My wishlist is everything I WISH I had, LOL! But I have had gentlemen buy the small things, like perfume, which I appreciate.

A WISHlist is just what it is, a WISHlist. Doesn't mean we who have those lists expect you to buy anything. Now occasionally someone will, but that's not expected or demanded.

Or at least I wouldn't, I can't speak for others who have the lists.

Wishlist are only appropriate for two reasons:

1) Weddings  2) Baby Showers


The worst wishlist are those who have links to places where you can purchase these items online. Very very very tacky!


Wishlist items I have seen: one asked for a signed Picasso, another one asks for World Peace, and I think the most ridiculous wish was a provider who wants a genuine Rolex watch ... but on her web site it states she will be insulted if its fake... hmmm makes me wonder what happens is she gets more than one item... can we say sell it on EBay...

Also here is another tips for you guys who insist on giving expensive gifts.... pay by credit card, never by cash and never give here the receipt... if she wants the receipt (sob story IE needs warranty work etc. etc.), she's planning on returning the item for a refund... A scam my sister used quite a bit in her career ...

Just stick to the simple keepsakes stuff, candy, flowers, scented candles, or cards.

I am very surprised to hear such grotesque language on this board and very taunted by a few suggestions that just because some of us have a "wish list" that makes us gold diggers. If you want the truth, many men/clients have previously asked me if I would make a list because it makes it easier to know what to get as a gift for Christmas, birthdays, etc., like I do them. I have such a list, but I was new to this business and figured I should do it, only at the urging of the customers. I really don't expect someone to buy me champagne each time or a gift certificate to Starbucks. I also find it horrific that some providers on this post have negative comments about other providers doing so, especially those who charge such outrageous fees for their services. I guess that makes up the difference in the gift area that some of us seldom receive anyway. I do not believe in bashing anyone, especially another provider, so I can honestly say that I am disgusted by these comments and the people who have made them. You cannot judge a book by its cover and people who do so are simple-minded. Sorry, but this really upset me.

Hugs,
Ciara

I have to admit that seeing a list of suggested gifts on a provider's site doesn't sit all that well with me.  Those who know me know I'm very (maybe too) generous with such things as teddy bears, flowers, perfume and so on.  If any provider ever left my home feeling unappreciated or run-of-the-mill, it wasn't for my lack of effort.

But, having said all that; I can understand the other side as well.  I imagine many hobbyists enjoy giving gifts to the providers whom they see.  This being the case, there's quite a potential for duplicate or (while I'm sure they're appreciated) unusable gifts.  It may be some of the providers in question are simply making suggestions for those hobbyists who may be inclined to purchase a gift, while ensuring money isn't wasted on something that will be put aside.  I, myself, at my family's request, maintain a wishlist on Amazon.com for those who want to get me something for the holidays or my birthday.

I do draw the line, however, at links to sites where a specific gift can be purchased -- especially if that link is to a BMW dealer or the like.  I think, as in many things, it's a matter of degree and good taste.

It's also vital the provider ensure no hobbyists be allowed to feel somehow less valuable if they choose not to give a gift beyond that which was agreed.  How the provider ACTUALLY feels is her own business.

You put them out there "wishing" some poor sucker would buy you something of the list.  Why else would you share your wishs with the whold world.  I don't, and anyone with class wouldn't either.  It's a taudry equivilant to the tip jar..."please give me more than what's being asked"  Real people with class don't ask for "gifts".  They accept them with grace when they come and the don't "suggest" what they should be.

Bottom line Talaya: You want to raise yourself up a notch?  Get rid of the not so subtle "wish list" and provide service with a smile and do a damned good job of it and just watch the unsolicited gifts come rolling your way.

And just incase you are wondering, I have given thousands of dollars in gifts.  But only to LADIES who never ever hinted that they were wishing for anything.

I'm not looking for suckers, at least not the type you're thinking of. I think you're too cynical about wishlists. And actually, I enjoy buying gifts myself for people. In fact in the last 5 years, I have bought gifts for some men during the holiday season.

Teddy bears on bed: not too erotic, makes no sense, I'm over 30.

Perfume: can't use that, cause of your SO

Flowers: great but they die, just like I will one day. I like them in the ground living.

Let me begin by saying I do not have a published wish list. I don't even have a website. However, I do have special items that I enjoy recieving. In the past I've recieved stuffed animals, flowers, cd's, perfume, treats for my dog, clothing, etc.  I cannot imagine recieving a more ridiculous gift than a stuffed animal. I stopped collecting those at about age six.  At least when I was teaching, I could display the stuffed animals in my classroom or give them to my students. Now they go straight in the trash. I've made my thoughts known about flowers too. I do not like recieving flowers for environmental and political reasons. Then there's the issue of explaining to my friends/family about who sent the flowers and why. Flowers go in the trash too. Perfume? I am very scent sensitive. Fragrance is *very* personal. When I'm not working, I'd rather not be thinking of a client each time I smell the fragrance. I have never kept a fragrance a client has purchased for me. The bottom line is there are some people like myself who appreciate the effort, but would rather have you sweet men not waste your time and money buying useless items. If you really want to bring something special, please ask the woman.

EOM

Ciara, your explanation of why you have a wish list is one of the two reasons I have always assumed ladies have wish lists - 1) clients suggested it, or 2) the lady kept getting something she would rather not get.

Some time ago I saw a web site where the provider asked the guys to stop giving her chocolates. The visual that created of an upstairs closet stuffed to the ceiling with boxes of chocolates has helped me understand why a lady might put up a wish list.

Share a bottle of Champagne sometime?

Men are easy to please.  Here's my wishlist (not in order of preference):

1. Staying way over the time agreed upon because she truly enjoys your company.

2. A call saying... I'm horny and I need someone f**k and this one is on me!!  (what an ego booster)

3. Giving you something that is not normally on the regular menu because she wants to make you feel special.

4.  All of the above in one shot.  (This is like the BMW request, lol)

Seriously, I have received some of these gifts from some special ladies and it is a joy to receive them.  I have also given expensive gifts, not because it was expected, but because it was so unexpected!  Gift giving should be a joy, not a chore.  If the gift is too rich for your blood, don't do it.  The ladies will understand.

Singer

(I feel like a F**king genie in a bottle...lol)

...that covers the libation of preference by the provider.
Its a definite ice breaker while we "dance" towards intimacy
which involves discussions about our prior connections and of course it usually includes more than a few laughs.

I find the lusty libation gives us both the most immediate reward
for our short time together.Once,I did the stuffed animmal routine and felt like a putz carrying it to and from (steets of NYC, hotel lobby,whatever)Upon presenting it to this one very friendly provider, she smiled cause she knew it wasn't my style and I think she also realized that she had to now deal with the to and fro routine.I told her to leave it for the maid...lol

About that genie...just heard this one the other day at one of my local "haunts".Cheers!

 A guy walks into a gin mill. As he walked up to the bar he noticed a twelve-inch man playing the piano, so he asked the bartender, "What's that all about?"

The bartender told him he that would tell him later. So the guy asked the bartender for a drink. The bartender said, "Before you get your drink, you get to rub the magic beer bottle and make one wish."

"Okay," said the guy. He went over to the magic beer bottle and rubbed it. Poof. Out came a genie. The genie, of course, said, "You have one wish."

The guy thought about it and then wished for a million bucks. A cloud of smoke filled the room, and then both the genie and the guy disappeared. In a few minutes, the guy reappeared back in the bar with a million ducks all around him.

The guy was astounded and said to the bartender, "Hey! I didn't want a million ducks." The bartender replied, "Do you think I wanted a twelve-inch Pianist?"

Booiiinnnnggggg!

...made by someone trained in the culinary arts, someone who is whimsical and creative and incorporates unusual and even exotic ingredients, is a treat to die for. Commercially made chocolate even at the top end such as Godiva just cannot compare.

There is a Peruvian woman in the San Diego area who creates some of the most exquisite chocolates I have ever tasted.
Some of these creations include bittersweet chocolate with ingredients from her native Peru such as Peruvian manjarblanco, or Pisco (Peruvian grape brandy). Others may include fruit and fruit flavors such as passion fruit, dried currants, dried apricots, or organic raspberries or dates.

Some have exotic touches of Peruvian coffee bean or even a touch of Alaea sea salt.

Very unique and indescribable treats for the palate.

I find it fun to discover a unique gift such as this to bring to someone special.

Of course, you can ride my Harley anytime.

Cheers!

Let me clarify my position.
I tend to agree with the gents that there isn't anything wrong with giving gifts to a gentleman or to a woman. My issue is that those types of things can be asked or brought on an individual basis. I hardly think that a gent who wants to present a gift to a gal will buy a motorcycyle on the first visit. lol In my opinion, chocolates, flowers, etc are appropriate. If a gentleman wants to get something more extravagant, I can assume its because they have an established rapport with one another and by that time I really don't think he's going to have to look at her website to figure out what would be a nice gift.

I'm seeing real estate, cars, diamonds, all kinds of things on a wish list. PLEASE!!! That is just plain arrogant. If a gentleman has the means or chooses to give such a gift early on, it is safe to bet that there is an assumed level of lifestyle where such things are ok. I have looked at many websties from all over the world. There are only a few sites/women where this type of thing would be appropriate. I can guarantee they don't have a wish list.

Sorry if you don't agree but this is my opinion and I'm entitled to it and I also happen to think I'm right.


-- Modified on 3/21/2004 8:00:50 AM

Denim miniskirt, and the new .45 G.A.P. Glock 37 with tactical light and laser, 2"/60' accurate, muzzle velocity ~290 m/s, and muzzle energy ~550 J, pure Austrian perfection. Sshhhwwwiiiiiiiiinnnnnnggg!!!
Chill the Champers doll, I'll be right back.

If you walked up to a homeless person and gave the chocolates, teddy bears, and flowers, they would think you were nuts. Does the gift really help the provider, or does it make you feel better? Are you ameliorating your guilt? How could you possibly be sorry that I would prefer the flowers to be living in the ground, enjoying the sun, and blooming? I would prefer a disadvantaged child to have a teddy bear, and well, gimme a  French pastry chocolate, I've got the munchies.

There is a fine line between reality and oddasity.
Depending on the lady,her tastes and her perception of a realistic gift.
However, it is nice when a guy brings flowers.
They say the when somebody gives you flowers, if they last a really long time, that means that they truly gave them to you from the heart.
Regardless, it is up to the guy.
Same goes for gratuity, always at the client's discretion.

and is not always the truth. I understand what you mean by some women carrying this wish list too far, but to insult all of those who have one is tacky and not good business. That, in itself, is very classless. And then to get responses back saying that providers with wish lists are not enjoying themselves with clients or attending to their desires is ignorant, and "ignorance is (not) always bliss."

I'm sorry but that's just my opinion and I have the right to respond to such rude comments too.

Hugs,
Ciara

can't more people on this board be like you, Rick. Actually, I have asked Glen to remove my "wish list" from my website, because after all this flack about it, it probably wouldn't be good to have it there. I was merely making it easy on clients who suggested it to me. It was in no way intended to anger anyone, but I guess some people have nothing better to do than complain about what others are doing -- too much free time, I guess. Anyway, I've always considered myself a very aggressive woman but caring, so there are times when I just have to speak my mind on this board. I hope it didn't offend anyone too greatly. That was not my intention. I guess you cannot win with some people, eh (Canadian in me)?

By the way, I'd love to share some champagne with you and spoil you rotten.

Hugs,
Ciara

How about some chaps to go with that Harley? You naughty girl. I love it!

Hugs,
Ciara

I agree with you Michelle. Wish lists are just that -- they're wish lists. I've taken mine down too. I hate mink coats and the thought of animals being slaughtered for them. I love flowers but not in a store, on the ground. Plus, my cats are allergic to them anyway. Chocolates, however, and edible oils -- yummy!

Hugs,
Ciara

you requested.

http://www.guannichocolates.com/index.html

The Web page lists her various creations with a description of each.

There's a local phone number and an email address to contact her.

Although I buy from her locally she indicates on the web page that she mails to the US and overseas.

I don't see prices listed and I'm not sure about delivery charges.

The chocolate is a bit on the pricey side but it is handmade and worth it for a special gift now and then IMHO.

Locals in SD can buy from her at some of the farmer's markets in the SD county.

I know she has a booth at the farmer's market in the Hillcrest neighborhood on Sunday mornings from 9am to noon (fairly sure on the time). Those locally can check the web page of the SD farm bureau for the various farmer's markets in the area. She is not at all of them but I do know she is also at the farmer's market in Escondido and the one in Vista.

She also says she delivers locally in SD county. Again I'm not sure about minimum order or delivery charges.

The link in the body of this post or the link title below
take you to the web site.

that providers should not criticize other providers.  Does that mean that hobbyists  should never criticize other hobbyists?  Perhaps all of the hobbyists should have been silent when one hobbyist in a recent thread suggested that women who are abused may bring it upon themselves.  I have noticed several providers on this board who almost always try to rationalize the questionable actions of other providers or put a spin on the actions that appears to be naive at best.  In my opinion that type of post reflects upon the person making it and only reflects in a negative way upon their credibility.  I am not suggesting that we have constant flame wars but sometimes a little criticism may be appropriate.

A WISHlist is a list of fun stuff you WISH you had! It's like WISHful thinking! Don't read more into them than there is. And many times expensive "gifts" in this situation are actually barter arrangements anyway. OR, like you've said, they have been seeing each other for a long time. And haven't you ever had a guy take you shopping before?

The subject of wishlists doesn't have to be this serious, really it doesn't! I can see where all the people who don't like them are coming from, but once again, that's why it says WISHlist. If we really expected you to buy something, it would be called the "Required Gifts" list.

personally I don't like the latter. If you read the post earlier, the thread said "the difference between a lady and a whore": referring to women with wish lists. That's why I got so irritated. No one, even in this business, likes to be called a whore in that type of a degrading way. I think free enterprise and freedom to expression is great, but allow the rest of us to do the same without judging us. You obviously favor what someone else posted, but allow us to have a rebuttal and talk about how we feel too. Providers who have helpful topics or suggestions are great, but them word those suggestions differently. Those who bash others intentionally for having different beliefs are the thoughtless people out there. Sedona, I need your help on this one. I'm pretty sure you'd agree with me.

Hugs,
Ciara

I could see someone letting people know that if they chose to bring a gift it would be appreciated and list one or maybe two small tokens.

Nonetheless, I think it's two levels of thinking here. I kind of compare it to visiting someone and bringing a gift. I don't have to call ahead or look at thier website to figure out what to get someone. Many times I may be a guest of someone and not even know who's house I am visiting. I can put enough thought into finding an appropriate gift. A gracious provider will NEVER complain that she may have gotten 6 boxes of chocolates in the same week. A gift is a gift. It should be received as such. If a gentleman asks you what you like because he CHOOSES to and wants your imput that is one thing, but I hardly think a wish list is used often enough to justify it. I can't possibly conceive that a woman gets soooo many gifts it just wears her out to the point she had to put it on her site.

One more thing...

Part of being a community is discussing and debating as well as sharing points of views. Issues such as this and probably many other things have changed over time because of forums like this and I see nothing wrong with it. I do think it's almost rude to have a list on a site. It's pretentious. Its being lazy at best. Being lazy if you are a man to not put enough thought into finding a non offensive gift and lazy for a womam to have it up there. Debate and growth is a healthy thing. This may not be the most serious of issues but since its here, I think its worth the discussion. From the consensus, it looks as if the gents don't care for them either.
I'm just a sometime loud mouthed Irish chick voicing her opinion on something I feel strongly about.

...I received was an invitation to Thanksgiving dinner. Perhaps it doesn't meet the technical definition of a gift but it was simply the sweetest most thoughtful gesture on her part.

The shared time with her with a few of her friends meant more to me than I think she perhaps knows. It was purely social and fortunately I was able to accept since I am not married and not currently involved with an SO.

Such a very pleasant get together and the food was quite delicious.
It made me feel special to know that she thought of me and offered to share her time with me in this way.

She knows who she is...such a nice gift!

Even your bitter bitches need some lovin'
LOL!- What about the bitter guys?
Please, do tell us all what bitter guys need. It's bad enough when their sack is heavier than their johnson, talk about cursed.
LOL!!!

Wow, that looks sooooo good!

Thanks for the link!

Not a problem. I've had a pretty bad week and feeling very Irish too. We just need to share our opinions by using a little more respect in our verbage.

Truce?

Hugs,
Ciara

I see your point in that Brooke Butler agreed with Jacksonlips about the difference between a lady and a whore that you might construe that as being the same as Brooke calling you a whore for having a wishlist.  

As to my favoring someone else in this debate my real comment is directed at providers always expecting other providers to support their positions or remain silent when they believe another provider is wrong in what she says or does.  Personally I feel that a wishlist with mink coats, Harleys or other gifts is not something that will make me likely to see that lady.

It seems that some ladies in this business like to remind everybody that this is a business and remind guys of that when it is convenient and when it is convenient pretend that it is something else.

I'm not having a bad week but if it will make you feel better, truce.

I also see your point. In fact, I've asked that my "wish list" page be taken down. See, I do listen to people on this board. However, a wish list is just a wish list. It's strange that you should say "reminded of the business" when providers are reminded of it daily, especially with the questions about donations, etc., when it's all listed in black and white on our websites. Anyway, again, I don't mind people talking about wish lists and disagreeing with them. I just didn't like the wording of "the difference between a whore and a lady" being used by a hobbyist then favored by a provider. But thanks for your objective first paragraph.

Hugs,

Ciara

her name is Sal fifteen miles on the Eerie Canal.

Hugs,
Ciara

The list is for more than a suggestive guide of what to get the woman, it is also insight into her likes and dislikes.  And damn, its fun to dream about getting spoiled with a Volvo C70!

I am a courtesan, (and a ho, and any other label you want to put on it) and I don't see a thing wrong with a tongue in cheek list.  Or an actual list ... there is no reason to be OFFENDED, geez, there is so much more in life worthy of getting offended by...this is a business of transaction at its core.  Thats not to say there isn't heart in it, but the core is you want something and the woman wants something, the exchange happens and everyone walks away happy.  how is identifying gifts (another form of exchange) different than a couple hundered bucks?  

To be pragmatic is not the same as being heartless....

Well, I hadn't given this thread much consideration, other than my eye caught "chocolate!" and I got what I needed! LOL

But, since I clicked on your post, CiCi, and saw my name, I thought I best put in my two cents, not that I can add much, or anything that hasn't already been said.

Since I have a 'feel' for what Jacksonlips meant, and how he meant it, I didn't take to heart what he 'said'. And, in just skimming over some of the posts, I found myself agreeing with almost everyone.

It's not that often that I check out the details of the ladies' sites - mostly just look there, pictures, rates, quickly, and that's it - don't read the bios, or the wishlists, etc.

Personally, when I began noticing wishlists, I didn't care for them, but I didn't care about it either. To each their own.  I figure someone started them somewhere and other ladies followed suit, or, they have had enough clients asking what kind of music or wine, etc, and they finally gave in and posted it on there to make it easier for the client.
Wishlists showing furs, cars, travel, diamonds, etc I mostly blew off as a joke, or, really bad taste.

When it comes to doing anything, there is always good, better, best and that includes communication, even criticism.

With that in mind, this thread could have gone much more smoothly.

I re read Jacksonlips's post and I didn't agree with him calling a person a whore in the litteral sense. I too, got the gist of his remarks and I really don't think he was trying to say that litterally. Maybe he was, I don't know.

In what I understood it to be, was a figurative way but I didn't take it litterally.

Please accept my apologies that I didn't understand your point earlier.

the thread could have gone more smoothly, but at least I got some interesting comments back on my posts. I actually asked my web guy to take down my "wish list" page because I didn't realize how many people felt so negatively about it. I just hated some of the hateful words being used about women who have them. There are some wish lists that are ridiculous in my point of view, but then again I'm not that person. Thanks for your input, hon.

Hugs,
Ciara

You actually read those things?

Unless brookeb has been reading provider's sites all over the internet, I can only imagine; but hope she isn't speaking of me...naughty, naughty, msb...careful where you tread...

I don't think asking for anything is wrong..some may give it to you, or you can get it for yourself..I don't MAKE anyone give me anything...I find it funny you had to post this on a different section....And your credits don't last for only 6 years...that is only for Rocheville pre-paid degrees...lol...keep your 'opinions' to yourself..

Sexy Sofia