TER General Board

Great advice! (eom)
DeepStudDiver 1244 reads
posted
1 / 16

By not performing as usual, I mean - she somewhat rushed you, or did not show the same attitude, or her mind was not into the session and she did not take care of your needs as usual.  I had this recent experience and emailed her that I was disappointed.  I wonder if I should just move on or give it some time.

Did you ...

1)  Took a break from her for awhile - and how long did you take a break?

2)  Did you wait for her to win you again or wait for her to show initiative to make up for the poor session ?

3)  Or Did you not go back to her anymore, and just moved on?

magic4u 37 Reviews 266 reads
posted
2 / 16

Well it depends on how often you this particular young lady.  If you see her a lot, and she always does a good job, it could be several reasons why she didn't do a good job during that particular session.

1. She could be going through something, and you caught her at bad moment
2. She may have just recently had a bad experience with another client or her pimp (if she has one)
3. She could be tired, and you're like the 9th or 10th client to come see her that day.

The list goes on & on.......down to the point of maybe she's just tired of seeing you.

I'd give it one more crack and if you notice her sessions has gotten worst, then move and advoid the drama to come.

inicky46 61 Reviews 182 reads
posted
3 / 16

"I'd give it one more crack."  Sorry, I know you meant this in all seriousness but the irony was just too much for me to ignore.  Probably too much vodka on my part.  Oh, well...

-- Modified on 11/24/2010 10:05:56 PM

justajohn123 173 reads
posted
4 / 16

every one has bad days, but her bad day cost YOU money.  chances are it will happen again, when that will be who knows, but IT WILL happen again. you gotta ask yourself if you wanna keep seeing her and hope for the best or just move on.  
I myself had this happen, and while i did see her after that happened, it wasn't long before things got progressively worse with her.  you really never know what is going on in a providers head let alone a womans head.  it can be hard to walk away after you have had countless wonderful times, and one bump in the road, trust me, i been there. but in my experience, that nice paved road with a little bump...well it ran out and i was going down a bumpy dirt road before i knew what happened and i regretted not stopping seeing her sooner to preserve a happy memory of her, cause i had great times with her.

i could be wrong though.

Posted By: DeepStudDiver
By not performing as usual, I mean - she somewhat rushed you, or did not show the same attitude, or her mind was not into the session and she did not take care of your needs as usual.  I had this recent experience and emailed her that I was disappointed.  I wonder if I should just move on or give it some time.

Did you ...

1)  Took a break from her for awhile - and how long did you take a break?

2)  Did you wait for her to win you again or wait for her to show initiative to make up for the poor session ?

3)  Or Did you not go back to her anymore, and just moved on?

HDDOC96 13 Reviews 187 reads
posted
5 / 16

If she's had time to answer you she should be able to be open to giving you an explanation.  If she has not respond I've move on.

Doc

mrfisher 115 Reviews 125 reads
posted
6 / 16

and as long as it didn't involve knives or guns, I'd let it go as long as you are basically satisfied with the gal in question.

Then there is the slow tappering off in perfomance situation.  We clients are consumers, and it is our responsibilty to set standards for the product we purchase.

I see one gal whom I've known many years, and whom I enjoy immensely, but over time I started to notice a bit of slackening in her performance.  Let's face it, sex work can be a bit of a challenge, physically and mentally, when done right.  If the gal thinks that she can spend most of a two hour session just chatting or laying there without you minding, there's a good chance that she will do so.

I am by nature adverse to confrontation, so I decided to let it slide at first.  Then I noticed that I was becoming annoyed with the situation and decided that maybe I should just find a new favorite to replace her, but I decided that I would rather get our sessions back to the state they were in when we first met.  So, I spoke to her about it, and lo and behold she understood and accepted my criticisms and now I'm one happy client again.  This is a win/win situation.

On the other hand, I had another favorite where the same situation developed and the discussion did not go smoothly.  It descended into defensiveness and recriminations.  The solution there was obvious, I pulled the plug on that.

Lesson to be learned:  Communicate clearly and unemotionally on what it is you want and expect.  If the gal is worth her salt, she will come through.

Otherwise, it's a big ocean out there guys.

I hope this helps.

martythewall 36 Reviews 126 reads
posted
7 / 16

Depending on how you explained it in email.  If you just called her out you might have insulted her.  If you expressed concern that she might be having some problem or acknowledged the bad day thing you might have won points.  Yes you are the customer but as an your atf can you expect greatness  from her every time? It might that you are spending to much time with her and being taken for granted. my .02

DeepStudDiver 157 reads
posted
8 / 16

She never emailed back after I ranted about the rushed service and no sweetness.
Anyway, I texted her last night "Happy Thanksgiving" -which is a week after the session.  
She texted back "I tried to email you".
I said "I never got your email. I hope you're well".  
Then she says "I'm ok. Happy thankgiving to you too".  
Then I said "see you later".
She text back "K".

I believe she did try to email me an answer but didn't have the courage to send it.
We had a misunderstanding before, and she tried to text me but couldn't send it. When we met, she showed me the 'draft' of what she was suppose to send but didn't.  Anyway, I'll take a break and see if she initiates contact.

Posted By: HDDOC96
If she's had time to answer you she should be able to be open to giving you an explanation.  If she has not respond I've move on.

Doc

MP67 11 Reviews 96 reads
posted
9 / 16

And you're right, AGAIN, that if you don't get what you're cumming for, move on.

I don't mind talking(surprise), during a break. But if the appointment consisted of chit-chat, eating and drinking, and not much else, well, I'll do without.

I can get a civvie GF(shivers) for that. ;)

luvlgs1 3 Reviews 74 reads
posted
10 / 16

staying cool right now is great advice. you don't want to lay a lot of emotional drama on her that might scare her away. you want to keep her as an option right? don't burn your bridges. fall back, regroup, give it some time, advance with care. keep on the high road.

casinostocks 7 Reviews 79 reads
posted
11 / 16

Posted By: DeepStudDiver
She never emailed back after I ranted about the rushed service and no sweetness.
Anyway, I texted her last night "Happy Thanksgiving" -which is a week after the session.  
She texted back "I tried to email you".
I said "I never got your email. I hope you're well".  
Then she says "I'm ok. Happy thankgiving to you too".  
Then I said "see you later".
She text back "K".

I believe she did try to email me an answer but didn't have the courage to send it.
We had a misunderstanding before, and she tried to text me but couldn't send it. When we met, she showed me the 'draft' of what she was suppose to send but didn't.  Anyway, I'll take a break and see if she initiates contact.
Posted By: HDDOC96
If she's had time to answer you she should be able to be open to giving you an explanation.  If she has not respond I've move on.

Doc
Just based on your above quotes and statements, neither your ATF nor you seem to be very good at communicating with one another very well! There's nothing wrong with drafting an email and coming back to it after a day or so, to revise and review it before sending it, but to leave it alone (in the hope that emotions die down) is not necessarily a great thing. I don't know as to how much or how hard you ranted at her, but a good communicator would not have ranted away and had written about a delicate matter whilst still under the spell of adverse emotions!  In any case, some may say, "oh well, what do you want? An Ivy Leaguer? A Rhodes Scholar?" Nah! You don't need to have a great education to communicate well (it does help though, but it is not a MUST) but having a lot of common sense goes a long way.

Take a break, but don't hod your breath to see if she initiates contact! If the sex was great in the past and it has now waned to the point that you'll have to deal with this kind of cr*p (from the both of you), then you are not in a good place together and you need to find someone else ;)

johngaltnh 6 Reviews 60 reads
posted
12 / 16
chipjeep 3 Reviews 90 reads
posted
13 / 16


Or redefine what an ATF is. My ATF is such because we communicate very well both in bed and out. If our encounter is ever less than spectacular she will usually apologize to me without me saying a word! And I do the same if I have an 'off' day.

It's all about respect. We each want the other to have an enjoyable experience whenever we meet. If there is no respect, it is time to move on or lower your expectations.

soflaguy44 34 Reviews 83 reads
posted
14 / 16

Or the wife experience.  Take a break and let the anticipation build up again.

hobbyman1975 7 Reviews 70 reads
posted
15 / 16

We all have different things that define an ATF but I agree with you 100%. Outside of great sex and chemistry, communication and respect are key factors to an ATF. I've had great sex with several providers but it's the intangibles that make a great ATF.

sensualcleoforyou See my TER Reviews 71 reads
posted
16 / 16

A girlfriend of mine was telling me that this client was insisting:"Let's do what you do with your boyfriend... come on...please..." I think he meant he was seeking a bare back experience. She says:"Sure, these days with my bf we argue and watch movies, but I'm up for that". The bare back seeker didn't see humor in that at all. I sure did.

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