A TER Christmas Story….

A short while ago I received an email.  It was long and had two attachments.  One was a picture of a lady holding a piece of paper next to two children.  I couldn’t make out what was on the paper but I could tell it upset her and I could see she had been crying. The next attachment was a scanned image of a 3 day notice.

I read the email and found that the lady was a delisted provider.  The two children were hers and the paper she was holding was the three day notice.  She was about to be evicted. She was about to be homeless with her two children.  

I knew losing her reviews played a large part in her situation.  Having a young child myself I felt compelled to help. I contacted the provider and offered to buy her lunch at a small restaurant not too far from my office. She cautiously accepted.

She was a little older and not particularly attractive.  She had already been seated with two familiar young faces next to her.  After a few minutes of small talk, I asked her what really happened.  This is what she said.

When she first came into the business she had no idea what TER was.  Soon clients were asking her about her TER reviews. She went online and was in shock at what she saw.  There were all kinds of details about her and how she treated the customers. She did not know what to do.

After talking to another client she found this was a good thing. She had noticed that any time a review came though that her phone would ring off the hook.  This went on for quite a while.  One week her business was a little slow. She and another provider were talking about the slow business. The other provider suggested she write a review herself.

She knew it was wrong but figured with as many reviews as she had, no one would notice one extra.  She was a little scared but she created a user account and submitted a review. As expected, the phone rang off the hook.  The end of the month came and well, no one will notice one more. The phones rang again.  She had found a way to make tons of money. It did not hurt anyone.  Why not?  

One day, sometime later, she had become more familiar with the TER community and went to post on the message board.  She logged in only to find that she had been banned. She checked her reviews. They were gone. Not knowing anything else to do, she emailed TER support in a panic asking why she had been delisted.  A day or so went by before she received back two words.  REVIEW FRAUD.

She knew she had been caught. She emailed them denying it and they responded with their proof. She did not know TER has dedicated people whose only job is to find providers who write their own reviews. She emailed several more times denying the truth and asking her reviews be put up. She received no response.

Since the calls were still coming in, though a bit slower, she gave up emailing them. As each week passed the phone got slower.  The few calls that did come in were from customers of a different caliber then she was used too. The guys calling from TER already knew what they needed to know and did not ask dumb questions. The guys from TER were nice, educated, and had the money to be in the hobby.  

She relied on those reviews to inform her potential customers that even though the paint was chipped, there was one hell of an engine under her hood.  She relied on those reviews to pop to the front of the new reviews list and remind her old customers of the time they went around the track with her. Without those reviews, her income had dropped over 50% over the first month.

Bills were piling up and holiday season was rapidly approaching.  She needed money.  She started taking calls that she would have hung up on in the past.  Sure enough, one of those calls she was to despe&rate to hang up on landed her in jail.

Because of her past, she was not eligible to be released on her own recognizance. She was able to contact a friend to pick up her kids from school but had to use the last of her savings to bail herself out.

Soon, her whole world was caving in. No money for rent.  No money for anything.  She was so afraid that every call might be the police.  She was so afraid she could not work.  She never realized how being part of the TER community had such an effect on her life.

There was a minute of complete silence as we stared at each other and then down at her children. I set a white envelope in front of her. Inside I had placed a cashier’s check to her landlord in the amount due I

read on the 3 day notice and enough cash to charge up her prepay phone and get some gas and food. “it’s not a gift.  It’s a loan.  I expect it back”, I told her as she started crying. I said, “You don’t have time for that.  Get your children to a baby sitter and wait for that phone to ring.”

That was the last I heard from her. I relisted her reviews and put them at the top of the new review list when I got back to the office. That was the last I heard of her until 10:32PM last night (the night before Christmas) when she emailed me asking where to bring the money she borrowed and a Christmas gift she had bought for my daughter.

This is a true story.  A couple of the facts were altered to protect the identity of the provider. It is now about 6:15AM Christmas day.  I just finished writing this and it occurred to me.  How many more providers are delisted out there wondering how to explain to their kids why Santa forgot a few things this year?  There must be some way share the true spirit of this holiday season while maintaining the integrity of the site.  

From now till the end of the year we will be accepting apology letters from providers who were delisted for cause. These letters will be presented to a three person panel made of VIP members selected randomly from the TER community.  The name of the provider will be hidden from them.  Each letter will be read in the order received.  The panel will vote to accept or deny the apology based upon the sincerity of the provider’s regret for breaking the rules and desire to once again be part of the TER community. The first 100 providers whose emails are accepted by the panel will be relisted. Providers who have made personal attacks against me or TER are not eligible.  Agencies are not eligible. Rude people are not eligible.

If you are a delisted provider that would like to submit an apology letter, please send email to [email protected] with the subject “apology letter.”  Please include your Provider name, your TER username, provider email address, phone number, link to current advertising, and any information you can to identify you.  (So we can find you in the database.)

If you are a VIP member and would like to be on this panel send us an email to [email protected] with the subject “Relist Panel”,  your TER username, and why you want to be on the panel.

David Elms
theeroticreview.com

Excellent - I got a lump in my throat reading this.

The cashiers check was an amazing gift and makes me inspired to think about what I can do to help others - that says a lot about the members of this site and hopefully speaks to others within the community.

Finally, the part about accepting apologies and offering FORGIVENESS says tons.  Hopefully others can take that attitude and use it in all areas of their life and not just during the holidays.

Good post, great message.

Best.

Dave,

 It is nice that with all of the acrimony and violence in 2007 TER does have a heart.

 A suggestion: why not expand the amnesty program to those ladies who have been banned from posting on the boards even though their profiles are still in the database?

 California was built by many pioneers who came West to get a "second chance" at a time when fingerprints, mug shots, and credit reports were yet to be invented and prevent someone from starting over.

 Give the deserving ones a second chance (and perhaps put "delisting lifted" on their profile so clients have a warning).


 

-- Modified on 12/25/2007 3:44:27 PM

Good because TER checks for fake reviews, and good because of the way David treated her with compassion, and bad because I have a hard time with paperwork type projects, and I have a severe back log of lovely providers I have not reviewed. I honestly did not realize how new reviews would help a providers business so much since the providers I visit are alrady well reviewed.Now that it has been spelled out where I understand the consequences I am sitting down and catching up reviews on the last two Great months..Merry Christmas

I just hope we don't go overboard on the forgiveness, and give a blanket amnesty to all delisted providers. Some providers were delisted for very good reasons, and their reinstatement should be based on the severity of their transgression along with the sincerity of their apology, not just how big a sob story they can spin.

I don't want to be the grinch that stole Christmas, but some providers just don't deserve to be here.

-- Modified on 12/25/2007 3:41:49 PM

   It is easy to get caught up in greed in this money making world of ours but this story is very touching and loving and accepting and ALL ABOUT CHRISTMAS CHEER.

THANK YOU FOR SHARING - THANK YOU FOR OPENING YOUR HEART TO THE IDEA OF A NEW OPPORTUNITY FOR DELISTED PROVIDERS.

I HAVE SEEN THE FACE OF TER CHANGE IN LITTLE WAYS SINCE TER STAFF (D. ELMS) HAS OPENED HIS HEART.

XO XO LISA BUTLER

Dave,

Thanks to you and the rest of the TER staff for the help you give to those of us who hobby, and those who provide. You demonstrated great compassion and wisdom. I hope the providers delisted exercise such wisdom, along with the VIP members who will be judging those wishing to be re-listed. Thanks again.

Now I see even more of the great human nature that has me liking this place more and more. You have shown true compassion when it would have been easy to just ignore the email. A class act if I ever saw one.

b-

To give that provider a second chance and help her in a colossal time of need was very noble of you Dave.

I hope providers learn some lessons from this story and always keep the integrity of the Ter review system in mind.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all

I am nearly speechless about this whole story.  

I think it's great that you helped this woman in need over the holiday season and my heart goes out to those who truly depend on their reviews and find themselves losing out.

Katie

Kudos to you !


yes  TER is the BEST place , My new years resolution is to spend more time here ... God bless her and her children !

I think what you're trying to do here is wonderful. Most of us get into a situation at some point where we need to do things that we may not normally do. Unfortunately, we sometimes make mistakes. Forgiveness for those mistakes usually makes it better for everyone involved. I truly hope this works out for this provider, and other providers who contact you.

I got a huge lump in my throat too.  I can just imagine her sitting at that table when you slid the envelope to her. God I just want to hug everyone right now!!!!

I think it's a great gesture to give this lady and others who have been de-listed a chance to apologize and be given another chance.
I was touched by reading this story and hope that some ladies  write a letter, and that those reading them will give these ladies a fair chance.
Well done, TER.

How blessed you are to have come to the fiscal ability to change someone’s life for the better, and to use that ability with philanthropic forgiveness as well as tutelage.

A timely narrative for the season at hand, with an edifying lesson and possible opportunity for all who read it.  

KUDOS

I just experienced this past weekend my first 3some with a provider that got delisted in the past couple of days. I felt safe b/c she had so many reviews. I even gave up my DD fantasy for the sake of safety. My wife & I were really looking forward to do a review. My SO & I really wants this story documented. I was in horror when I saw her delisted on Monday. I requested from our provider to write an apology letter. I am now scared to tell my wife she had fake reviews. She might get upset. We did have a great time and she did do the all the juicy acronyms. I hope my provider sends the apology letter. This really sucks! Well, at least we did it and we did have a good time and I still think my provider and this site rocks!

-- Modified on 12/27/2007 7:40:09 AM

YOU SIR, are an Angel!

You read what she had to say and rather than focusing on her mock review, decided to look deeper.

While I am sure there are others that do post fake reviews (and eventually get caught) and make it hard for the rest of us, SHE did it not to hurt, harm or mislead anyone.
She had a good review previously, yet needed something to let everyone know, in the slew of ladies on here, that she was alive and well!

There is always 2 sides to every story and after reading this David, I am blown away that you took the time to investigate and give her that '2 minutes' to plead her case.

When children are involved, I soooo feel for many providers on here, as they need a roof, food for them and what you did...well again....Peace to you.
What comes around goes around and YOU have certainly did the "PAY IT FORWARD"


PEACE~!

It is true
reviews help
and I am sure the ladies you did see would appreciate it

Some like myself, like the DISCREET aspect of a session, to keep it between myself and the gentleman I see, but there is a way to 'tactfully' write a review and not write as if it you were with your high school buddies on Monday morning behind the bleachers speaking of your Weekend escapades!

I think by TER writing this , has informed many people.....Good on TER!

Volunteer YOU, that is.  I'm far too nice.  You, on the other hand are a rotten bastard, and I mean that in the nicest way possible.

Hope you had a good holiday...

"It's a thing called a heart."

Except for the part where you loaned her rent and enough spare cash to get back on track, this could have simply been a story about business amnesty.

  Risking the envelope and giving her the chance to put things right is a gesture that few people would make.

  Bravo sir, and thanks for sharing.

-J
 
P.S. I think the general offer for reconsideration is terrific and serves the interests of all concerned.

I ran this by our legal department and they wanted me to clearly say who we cannot relist.  Here it is!



Providers who are not eligible to return are providers who:


1. were delisted for outing personal information about members or other providers.

2. through their direct or indirect involvement endangered the safety, privacy or general wellbeing of others.

3. with obvious malicious intent, posted statements that they knew not to be true about me or TER on a widely read (or not so widely read anymore) public forum (I have feelings too guys)

4. have medical conditions (that we are aware of) that may endanger the safety of others.  

5. we believe to be less than 18 years old.

6. have threatened legal action against TER.

7. created fake bad reviews to attack other providers

8. have been abusive to TER employees. It is my responsibility to maintain a safe and healthy work environment for my employees.
As an employer I must minimize the potential exposure to any unnecessary job stress or abuse.  
When a provider has shown disrespectful or abusive language against one of my employees in the past I cannot allow her to return.

Given it is the holiday season, bless you on the amnesty program to those who understand the error of their ways and willing to play 'nice' with others on this fine TER community!  While given amnesty, I thank you for maintaining the integrity of the site which we all shared.  Wish you and your family a happy holiday!!

There are other reasons besides putting up phony reviews why a provider is delisted. She might have asked to be delisted for a variety of reasons.

b-

A warm heart and kind soul will always be blessed for its good will. I wish you a lovely holiday season and all of us here are grateful for your good will, and your dedicated passion to see Ter ran at the highest professional level.

is if I got to personally interview each of the ladies in question, rotten bastard that I am. lol

I actually had a quiet holiday, I never left the house. New Years OTOH, I am headed back to Costa Rica, then back to Colombia sometime later in January.

I hope your Christmas was a good one for you and yours.

I am thrilled at the second chance this gal got. TER is such a powerful advertisement and I am not sure gals realize it until it is too late. There is no question that the guys you get on it are so much better. And that for a more mature gal, TER can really help if she provides a teriffic service.
Nelson Mandela forgave the attrocities in South Africa and Dave forgave some of the errors of us gals and I for one totally appreciate it.

xoxo Kate

All of us have made a mistake or two in our lives. EVERYONE deserves a second chance.
Well done.

It's amazing that even with a forum that deals with an illegal activity (yes, our "hobby" is not sanctioned by our society) and you gotta check with the legal department!

Thank you for posting this.  Are you only accepting applications from "hobbiests" or also a few peers... as in providers.

Wow...I think that is fantastic! TER and the providers I've had the pleasure to meet have made my life much more pleasurable over the last 3 years. It's nice to see that the staff at TER are strict because I admire that.

The providers out there who are given this chance should suck it up and apologize because as a client I always check TER reviews before I meet a provider. I've taken the "point" (posted a very first review for a provider) only twice, thank god they were nice ladies. But from now on if I've never seen the provider I'm always gonna check her out first on TER. I'm 100% convinced that this site is the best of the best, and is strict yet fair which benefits ALL OF US!

Johnnymas

To make an educated ruling, it seems reasonable to me that you'd need to know ALL the facts.

xmas involved gifts, family and gambling.  If only there was a little luvin involved, it would've been a perfect day, lol.

I was very touched by your post! It is wonderful for this holiday season! Keep up the good work and many thanks for all you and the TER staff do!
Thanks
Vicki

I have known Dave for a while now and I can say he goes out of his way for more people than is ever even mentioned. He is really a good hearted person and it really should be noted. His business ethics are of the highest caliber and his love for his family is second to none.

The providers/agencies that have been de-listed for fraud activity in my experience have all justly been banned. I know from my business model, The Erotic Review is and has always been THE backbone of our business.

Several years ago when I found this website I was thrilled.  I thought technology was great and it is.  It is also great that you guys can find fake reviews thanks to this technology.  The monthly fee is well spent.

What she did was wrong very wrong.  But you gave her the chance to correct it.  So for that you are THE MAN!!!!

As much as I enjoy this business I want to say something to the providers in this business.  Please don't let this happen to you.  I have met many great ladies over the years.  And it would kill me to know that some of them were completely dependent on this business to support young kids with absolutely no savings or alternate means of support.  You women are like pro ball players.  And as we all know that can't last forever.  Please save AND invest your money.

I thought it was clever. :p
(h E a R T)