"Theres many facets for this Gem. You have to have a healthy defined perspective about who you are personally and what this means to you. Expect unpredicted moments and feelings."

Perfectly stated

You covered some great things and worded it so well. Great suggestion (#1) about reading TER and getting a feel for the whole game and what it's like and what to expect and what to deal with because it is full of surprises, isn't it?! And, in (#3) to encourage to use technology to your benefit and learn to use what's out there.
BUT, your last paragraph:

"Theres many facets for this Gem. You have to have a healthy defined perspective about who you are personally and what this means to you. Expect unpredicted moments and feelings."

is just priceless.
The 'healthy, defined perspective about who you are" is so very important. You've got to know and believe in why you chose to do this, and it needs to be a POSITIVE thing in your life. Otherwise, it can easily be harmful; mess with your head.

Great advice! And didn't I read that you're new in the business, and see what you've learned and felt already! You'll do real well. I think it's actually a fascinating journey..don't you?
Beautiful, Morghan.

Morghan, thank you for taking the time to provide the thoughtful post that you provided.  My quesion was aimed at the business side of the business, but you expanded it to include the psycological side as we;; which is really more important.  I have a couple of follow-up questions for you or any other ladies who might choose to answer.
With regard to your footnote about the psychological side of the business, would you or another provider care to expand on this?  The other providers who responded zeroed in on this statement solely which points out the importance of your statement.  I believe I understand the basic statement you made, but I'm equally sure I, and perhaps other men who read this, do not understand the depth of your statement as the other ladies who responded did from their experience.
Less important, but also of interest to me is your response in item 2.  You mention startup costs of getting into the business and address the cost of advertising as a one of the primary costs of getting into the business.  What are some of the other costs?  I would imagine if you're not working-part time you would need a certain amount of savings to survive on until you are established.  Also, an initial amount for new clothing might be an item.  I'm reaching here, but would some of the other costs be a membership at a gym or more frequent trips to the hair dresser or nail salon?  What am I missing?
Lastly, in item number 3 you mention PublicData.com which up until your post I had never heard of.  Are there any other suggtions you have that are obvious to the ladies, but not so obvious to the men?  Thanks again.

Thinking more about Morghan's quote about the gem, I conjured this up last night, both for new hobbyists and providers...

You're contemplating standing on the banks of a raging river that is filled with the currents of the strongest forces known to man--attraction, passion, lust, want, procreation...

If you're a strong, self-aware person, jump in and bathe in all the experiences those currents take you to.  But if you're not sure who you are or why you're taking the swim, the river will decide for you.

Put another way, if you're ready for it, the hobby will help you reveal who you are.  If you're not, it will change who you are.

This is a very important article and a must read:
Police Deception

by J. D. Obenberger, Attorney at Law

© 1998 J. D. Obenberger

There is a lot of dangerous misinformation about arrest and police conduct that I have heard from clients over the years, and it is important that you have an understanding of what the law actually says. It is not my intent to get into the philosophy of whether it is right or wrong for the police to use dishonest of deception, but instead, just to candidly report to you what the law permits peace officers to do.

Police Deception in Detecting Crime

There is a widespread belief out there that police officers are required by the law to act like Boy Scouts, that they can never lie, that if they do lie, it means that you can beat a case, that they have to read you your rights and if they don't do it, you can beat the case, etc., etc. and more etc.

It is simply not true that a police officer has to tell you the truth if you ask him (or her) whether he (or she) is a police officer. It is simply not true that a police officer will not take off his clothes in a prostitution investigation of massage or escort. It is not against the law for a police officer to proposition a prostitution suspect for sex for money. It is not necessarily entrapment for an attractive female decoy to dress provocatively at night on the streets, make eye contact with drivers, and beckon them, and try to induce an agreement for commercial sex. I have not read many reported decisions in which the Courts have been enthusiastic about trick, deception, and artifice by law enforcement personnel, but the Courts do understand that in the real word, a world in which crime loves darkness, stealth, and concealment, crime can sometimes only be detected and prosecuted through those same means.

It is not entrapment for the police to provide someone with an opportunity for a crime. Entrapment only exists as a defense when it can fairly be said that the government actually created the crime. The focus of the entrapment defense is on the state of mind of the accused. If he or she readily accepts an invitation to break the law, it shows pre-disposition to commit the offense, and so it cannot be fairly said that the government created the crime. Police Deception in Interrogation

The use of deception, trick, artifice, and dishonesty in interrogation is not a mere aberration or fluke that sometimes happens. It is simply routine in almost every law enforcement agency, and it remains routine because it is effective


Because most courts take the view that deception is acceptable in custodial interrogation so long as it is not likely to elicit false statements from a suspect, it is a widely accepted practice to tell the suspect untruths about his case. He will be told that his co-arrestees have made a statement and have identified him as the ringleader, even when they have remained silent. He will be told that his fingerprints were found at the crime scene even when it is not true. None of this will make his subsequent confession involuntary and inadmissible against him at trial.


It should be noted that just as life is not always fair, the law is not always fair either. You do not have any reciprocal right to lie to a police officer

The most important rule to remember, if you are arrested, is that nobody ever got hanged for what they didn't say.  When Miranda was first decided, police officers and chiefs, from coast to coast, predicted that law enforcement would become unworkable, because suspects would heed the warnings, make no statement, demand a lawyer, and refuse to cooperate. Well, needless to say, the sky did not fall in on law enforcement. That is because the suspects kept talking.

It is actually rare for a suspect to invoke his Miranda rights and refuse to answer questions. The reasons are complex. Some people think that they can talk their way out of an arrest or out of jail. Some people feel the need to confess guilt. Some respond easily to a police officer who comes across like a friend. Some are convinced that they will go down anyway, and that "things will go easier" with a statement. For whatever reason, the police were amazed and chagrined to learn, that rights warning or not, defendants kept singing like canaries and manufacturing cases against themselves.
No matter how bleak the situation seems to you at that moment, you should make no statement about the offense you are being charged with or investigated for until you have consulted with a lawyer. Do not consent to the search of your vehicle or your house, or anything that belongs to you until you consult with a lawyer.
But do not consent until you have talked to a lawyer. This requires courage, because the presence of the officer and his partners, and your uncertain situation, impels you to want to get on the right side of the officer. The situation is inherently intimidating. Do not believe a statement that the officer can get a warrant anyway. If he didn't want your consent, he wouldn't ask for it. Maybe he needs it, maybe he doesn't. You don't know. But, if you have the choice, and he has, after all asked you to make a choice, your choice is "With respect, officer, I'll have to decline to give that consent until I talk with a lawyer." You can give that response whether or not you have been advised of your rights.

Joe Obenberger is a Chicago Loop lawyer concentrating in the law of free expression and liberty under the United States Constitution. His firm has represented many owners, employees, and customers of adult-oriented businesses, both online and in the “real world”. His practice extends to First Amendment cases, municipal zoning and licensing, the law of privacy, criminal law and civil rights. He can be reached in the office at 312 558-6420 or paged at 312 250-4118 in any emergency. His e-mail address is [email protected]