...there's this real cheap and fanatically religious bastard who lives a couple of miles north of my part of town. A few months ago I met HIS wife. She's real nervous and sweaty a lot of the time and seems to live in fear of her husband. I don't want to say he's abusive, but it's very, very hard to see him as anything but angry and gruff even in their most private moments.
Anyway, I hate to be around the guy, but socially we belong to mutual groups (yes, GROUPS, plural) so we've butted heads several times. Then, last summer, I met his wife and we wandered off and talked, agreed to meet at the coffeehouse, and eventually started an on-and-off.
Now, I really enjoy being intimate with her. She's got a great body, and she can be very sexy in a soft-spoken sultry kind of way. She feels old-fashioned Catholic guilt before and after, but in bed she's very uninhibited and in some ways we share the most passionate sexual expressions I've had lately.
So, although I have no wife or SO of my own, I kind of understand the tension between the P4P ladies and the infidelity rush of cheating on someone who sort of assumes you're her one and only.
So my answer is no, I wouldn't be happy giving up the hobby.
No matter how much you care for a woman, no matter how alluring you find her, no matter what sexual heights and depths you explore together, she is, in the end, a singularity. Her breasts are a certain size and firmness, her complexion is a certain shade, she is either svelt or voluptuous... Always the same.
Now, not to get too Freudian or Langian (surprisingly spellcheck accepts that word), interaction with your SO or, in my case, a borrowed SO, only reflects your image in one funhouse mirror. Her perspective (specifically of YOU) is finite. Other women see you differently. That's what's behind all this "My wife doesn't understand me" crap we're always subjected to around here. You share different things with different women. And each woman has something fresh and different to offer a man. To a point. A lot of women just don't want to share of themselves and go into hookering offering a mechanical suck 'n' fuck 'n' a kiss for luck for the buck.
But, assuming that the skill one developes in this hobby is how to discern from ads and emails thr beautiful bodies and interesting souls from the mediocre dry sexuality of halfhearted whores, then fidelity to any pair bond necessarily means cutting one's self off from the larger world of yet to be explored pleasures.
There are fantasy games, bondage experiments, control exchanges that vary with each partner.
If you were on a desert island and could only listen to one song for the rest of your life, which would it be? Dumb party question. The joy of listening to music comes from each piece being different.
Yes and no.
Yes I compare in my head. But comparing a museum of memories to each new painting is never fair. Sometimes you are struck by a new piece of art that you really appreciate but yet your home "collection" still has it's gems.
As I've stated in other threads, I have yet to find a provider who gives better head than my SO. However, the quantity is lacking, thus I hobby to get me through the lean times. If quantity as well as quality were more forthcoming, then, yes, I'd probably cut back severely if not outright quit. I'd still miss hobbying for the variety it provides.
