It is important to only give info to providers with a track record, and even then only to verify certain information.
If a provider is asking for personal information on a hobbyist such as name and employment, that means she does not have it and I would question why she wants it. If it is for legitimate screening, then she should already have this info.

Then LE could also be fishing for info. That's even worse!

Thanks for the post

If this has been covered here before apologies. I don't check these boards too much.

However in the last week I've had some wierd emails, not unpredented. And I think it's the gents who may be in danger here.

One 'lady' asked me very aggressively for info on a guy's name that I recognised, with email and telelphone no. She gave absolutely no information about 'herself'.

I wrote back and asked who 'she' was. 'She' wrote back with no qualifying information but ranted about how 'she' didn't want to deal with any more 'bullshitters'.

These emails had the tone of a Nigerian scam - improbable, wierd - but given that they didn't ask for money I feel this is some kind of cop call. 'LE investigation' in America terminology. Or even a wife!

What bothers me is that given the concerns about safety in this industry there are women - not so smart perhaps - who might offer information in a knee jerk way to anyone who asks for a 'reference'.

Guys be careful who you choose to deal with. I always tell my clients that for good reason.

Thanks for the warning, Tamara!  Good to know that we might be vulnerable in that way.  Hope all take notice...including providers!  The veterans will know that already...but there are always us newbies coming along behind.

og

.... in the past month or so, I have had two ladies call for references.  I told them they must e-mail, as they could be a wife, girlfriend, etc.  I nevr did hear from either one via e-mail.  I do not believe it was LE, as all involved were not from my area.

  Also, I try to have my gentlemen friends give me a "heads up" when they will be listing me as a reference.

Hugs and Kisses

allow a copy & paste off the Gen board onto the different regional boards?  Because I think this is an excellent topic that many providers probably don't really think about & maybe one each of whomever reads your post could volunteer re-posting it for their regional board so the word is spread quickly.  I know I only confirm or deny what specific info they submit to me, but honestly & for some odd reason, even being a skeptic half the time, I guess I never really thought of the idea regarding this venue as easy prey on vital info.

I sometime TOFTT and some new providers require references as they have a mentor keeping them out of trouble or have done there homework before starting. Would you give a reference to a new provider at the hobbyists request like a "he's safe", nothing incriminating?

From your posts you seem very professional and you do have a good reputation as an agency. I am just wondering as A co-worker of my wife's is thinking of going independent and I was wondering how ruff a go she would have getting references and staying safe. Thank you.

I would and do ask any potential reference to not give out any info on me unless I at least send them a message indicating the name of the lady or ladies who  may contact them to ask about me.  If you hobby a lot, it may be a bit more hassle, but ...

Unless I can verify that a lady is indeed legit (has 10+ reviews by reviewers whom each have 7+ reviews - and not the standard pattern of 2/mo for free VIP as those can be fake reviews for the sake of the VIP, plus a website and ads in various places), I do not respond.  A gent may want to TOFTT but there's no reason I should be caught up in something stupid if it happens to go down that way.  Even my saying "He's safe" is more than I'd be comfortable with as it establishes some sort of tie between us... and LE can twist all sorts of things to pressure him into believing I've said something about the nature of our relationship and that can then prompt him to say things he shouldn't.

Bottom line, if you guys want to take chances - fine.  I'm not going to any more than I can help it.  

Newbies coming along behind.....LOL...sounds better when you say bringing up the rear....LMAO...sorry had to add that one in there.

I have been varified alot by providers and most recently by one who is back on the seen for a bit and she varified me this way she contacted one of my references and asked this is he ok my refernce said yes and I was good to go. that is all that should be said in my opinion nothing more nothing less.

I've had several PM's here from people asking about providers I reviewed. Most of them ask "what about her face? Is she pretty?" Several of the gals I reviewed don't show face pics in their ads.

I tell them, "Yes, she's very pretty and if you ask for one, I'm sure she will send you a pic."

If they ask for anything more, my standard response is, "I respect_____privacy and I hope she respects mine. Everything I am willing to share about her is in my review. If you have additional questions, write or call her directly." We need to respect and protect one another here.

You are my kind of girl, TamaraG.

I appreciate Edrienne's approach here, as well as Tamara's.  

Last thing I want is some 'auto-reply' telling anyone who asks that I'm "ok".  Suppose it's a guy's SO asking the question.

Interesting that you TOTALLY left subject here though.

Yep!

When asking another lady for a reference, I always include my website address & my TER ID, which makes it easier for her to verify that I'm legit. For someone to expect to get a reference, and not identify who they are, is beyond me & just ridiculous in so many aspects. I will give references over the phone, but only if the lady in question is calling from her "work" phone, in which I can Google the number & verify who she is that way.. although e-mail is always much easier.

checking with the person being asked about.  HE really should contact her in advance.  Yes, suspicious SOs, GFs, Wives, PIs could really do some damage this way.  If SO is suspicious, your goose is probably already cooked...  but way better to be *suspected* than proved beyond a shaddow of a doubt.  I don't think she can warn him...  if his email has been compromised for instance, her contacting him confirms the connection.

IMHO, providers should respectfully decline to give referances unless first contacted by the gent...  and say so when contacted...    


I have been PMed about reviewees.  I am very aware of a lady's security needs & I can restate my review in other words if that clarifies anything.  But I will NOT give her part of the city or exact town.  I will NOT describe her location.  
I don't feel any need to get graphic, since every coupling of 2 unique individuals is...  well unique.  I'll try most anything once...  but not everything will *fit* or line up or be successful...  so a provider gets points from me for trying & then suggesting / moving on to something else that might.   As a mature gentleman, I have come to appreciate the desire to make this work.   I EXPECT your experience to be somewhat different, so exact details accomplish nothing useful.  

I'm not an agency!

But yes I keep it really basic (unlike some ladies who've written to me) and I would support a new provider if I knew her otherwise, absolutely. Not every lady wants reviews and will be part of that system and I think that should be respected. Also just because a person has reviews it doesn't mean that they can be trusted.

I wrote on this board some time ago that one well reviewed and well known provider was supporting a guy who said he wanted to meet me (when I was in LA), in such a way that it really seemed she was working for LE. People on this board said yes, sometimes 'ladies' turn on other companion and clients in a deal with the police so that they can keep working.

(The 'guy' was very pushy, tried to see me late night and early morning with no references or information except back up from this woman at all. He/they (LE) must have been hoping I'd be desperate and stupid.)

Yes I always appreciate a note like this from a gentleman.

I like your style.

I think it'd definitely be a win-win situation if it became an industry norm that gentlemen contact providers in advance re. references.