So I was reading this story about a provider who runs into a client in her personal life, (very funny story!), and I wondered....[link removed by moderator] (google "alex lieberman escort")

How many of you ladies try hard to avoid situations where you run across clients outside of "work"?  If/when you do see someone you know, do you try to hide?  Does the guy behave and not approach or do they sometimes acknowledge your identity in a bad way?

-- Modified on 6/23/2010 8:41:19 AM

-- Modified on 6/23/2010 10:45:39 AM

He followed me around the store for a bit and finally walked past an aisle I was in three or four times.

I was wearing gym clothes, had no no makeup and was on the phone with my boyfriend having an important conversation.

I felt like the client invaded my space and I feel like if I'd done it to him or any other client that'd be grounds for them terminating our relationship.  This is a business of discretion and he didn't know if I was alone; if I saw him in real life I certainly wouldn't assume that he were alone.  

If you see a provider in public throw a smoke signal, wink, send a text or email.  Don't approach her because when we're off, we're really off.

I've had a client yell my stage name across a restaurant, I've had them approach me or stare me down in other public spaces.  It's disrespectful because again, I wouldn't do it to them.  Unless you have an unusually close relationship with a provider that has developed into a true friendship (i.e. you go to each others homes or would introduce each other to your friends or colleagues) then leave each other alone in public.

You know the saying what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, well what happens behind closed doors stays behind closed doors. Neither the lady or the gentleman should acknowledge each other.

when we ran into one another outside of session.

Both sought me out and asked if I was trying to avoid them. I told them that I was not, that I was being discreet in case they would prefer not to be approached.

I do not care who approaches me in public. I have nothing to hide and no one to hide from. I have been approached several times by provider acquaintances in public settings.

But I do agree with you - my "default" would be to acknowledge at a distance, discreetly, but not approach.....

I will avoid because I have no idea who he is with and sometimes even the slightest acknowledgment can be detected by his female companion and questions asked. I prefer to err on the side of absolute discretion and if that means I completely ignore him in public...that's what I will do.

But I will tell you of one story...there was an instance where a client was out of line but the good thing was I was alone. He was not, but the silly man insisted on openly acknowledging me. And he used my stage name what's more. Well, his female companion was obviously curious and chimed in with "how do you know each other?" I looked at him and said, "do you want me to tell her or would you rather"? I then looked at my watch and did the old "my goodness look at the time", said ta ta and left.

Needless to say I never booked with him again and I hope I made enough of an impression that he never publicly acknowledged another escort again.

while enjoying lunch a gentleman comes up to my table and says " wow you look great in that dress as I watched you walk in " He then with a wink said  "could we have lunch together some time". Everyone knows me here and he mine as well be a stranger to me. I saw him well over a year ago one time and has used me as a reference a few times. I declined his offer in front of everyone as he stood over my table. "No thankyou" and continued eating my lunch as he stood there a minute and then walked away.

Never make any notation either way as you never know who might be watching

Kisses Haley

It was hard to even recognize them. No make up, no high heels, no fancy outfit, hair pulled back. One lady had on a baseball cap.  As others have mentioned, I respect their privacy and didn't approach. You never know who they might be with.

Now that's the style of a discreet gentleman...thank you!

Once. It was the only provider I had ever even been with at the time. She was there on a non-provider professional assignment as was I. We ignored each other though I caught her looking at me from across the room and the familiarity sweeping over her. Probably wouldn't mind if she approached me but not sure how I would explain it to the friend I was with, religious fellow married for nearly 20 years.

it's only been asked 1000 times before!

"He followed me around the store for a bit and finally walked past an aisle I was in three or four times.
I was wearing gym clothes, had no no makeup "
"I felt like the client invaded my space"

 It seems odd that he took the time to follow you around the store and didn't mutter a quiet, indiscreet hello or a direct smile,IF he recognized you??
I'm betting he didn't recognize you with your gym clothes on and no make up,and he thought you were a civvy he didn't have the guts to strike up a conversation with.I've noticed guys following civvys in grocery stores more than many times.Granted its creepy and I often follow them into the parking lot to make sure nothing weird happens..{follow the guy to make sure he doesn't follow the girl}.If a guy  walks by a lady more than once and doesn't make a sound, whether she's a civvy or a provider, he is portraying himself as a stalker.
I'll never forget a stripper that I "thought" was Hot. I had only seen her in the Clubs at night.I knew her well {club only}and she trusted me.Many times when she was off her shift, she asked me to walk her to her car.
One morning after  spending a lucky night in a  apartment complex I had never visited ,I left early to go to work.As I started to drive slowly up the street trying to awaken, my stripper friend was getting something out of her trunk. She had no wig or make up on, and when her eyes met mine, she had the look of, "My World has been invaded" I would have never recognized her if I didn't know her car and her window stickers.
I never went back to that club or that side of the apartment complex.She was scary.  
One more example although not a scary one.A few years ago I met a Asian provider and we slowly became friends.. As a provider she always wore a lot of  make up and IMO she was very beautiful. When I got to know her in her civvy life she never wears make up at her home, and she is still extraordinarily  beautiful.
If I didn't know both of them there is no way I would recognize one from the other.
Quad's Just saying, there might be another side of the story...Your hobby friend might only be a common everyday silent stalker, pursuing civvys he doesn't talk to.

Do I look "better" with my makeup on?  Yeah, some guys seem to think so.  Other guys (including clients who have spent overnights with me and traveled with me) don't think so.

I have very distinct hair, a very distinct body type and other identifying marks.  I wasn't completely covered up, I was in revealing gym clothes and he was in my neighborhood where he knows I live via discussions because his longtime girlfriend lives in the same neighborhood about two streets over from me.

He did try to get my attention and when he got home he emailed me and said he saw me.  Well of course I know he saw me, he followed me around and paced around me trying to get my attention.

You see providers and strippers in candlelight and dark clubs.  This is a client that I've shared dinner dates with, he knows what I look like.

There is no other side of the story so stop reading too much into it.

"Uh actually, no a woman shouldn't look entirely different without her makeup and I don't"

"You see providers and strippers in candlelight and dark clubs.  This is a client that I've shared dinner dates with, he knows what I look like."


Ha Ha Ha ..That might be your case CC but there is indisputable evidence to the contrary. Perhaps they shouldn't but many appreciate the fact that they do.Many women look completely different without their make up especially so if they spray it on. I have also been on dinner dates with civvy ladies I would take to the Beach in the bright sun light light, but they are few and far between.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRWMu4yQ6aA

on this board has been discussed a "1000 time." Just some people hear feel like they have to be entertained on an ongoing basis.

Welcome back to the board. Hope to hear from you again.

-- Modified on 6/23/2010 1:33:59 PM

Maybe I've just developed a more keen sense of what I like, but none of the ladies that I've seen without makeup look so different that I couldn't identify them immediately.  I like a natural look, and perhaps that impacts my results, but I don't see a HUGE difference in looks.  Maybe it's just my crappy eyesight these days, lol.

Avoid, avoid, avoid.  Don't acknowledge.  You never know what's going down in their life. Pretend it never happened.

i ask if she's still cbj. If not has the donation increased any for bbbj. Of course i use her board name when addressing her also.

If you know how many times a question or story has been told on this board (and then feel the need to criticize someone's comment or question) it is time for you to get a life. You have way too much time on your hands.

Your opinions and feelings are understandable. Perhaps at some point after several hobby meetings, both provider and client might realize they share common territory in civvie life. If you live close to each other, you may very well bump into each other in a store, theatre, bar, restaurant, car dealer, parent teacher meetings or who knows where else.

I ran into a provider unexpectedly in a large city department store while she was with her father, mother and sisters. She looked at me with a smile but, neither of us tried to make further contact. She was trying to be discreet for my benefit and I was doing the same.

Later we discussed the circumstances about what happened and how to behave if it happens again.  The outcome of our talk was that there was no need to be that discreet due to our circumstances. I eventually met her parents, was invited to her home, and dated her in the "civvie" world.

Play it safe, if you have not discussed the topic, the best approach is to assume it's not OK to approach.

to see if little Channelguy remembers her....sort of the sniff test and then shout her stage name, TER overall rating and the scores I gave her.

Based on doing that I wait to see what her response is.

What else would you expect a hobbyist to do?  LOL

If I run into *anyone* I recognize, I'm not going to run up and introduce myself if they're talking on the phone!

There was a provider with me, and I'm thinking I don't want to be a witness to your ritual.

I love catching up with clients over the phone or email, but it's VERY risky having a conversation in a public place. I'm fine with a smile or wink. But, I don't know who you are with and discretion is key!

Great example: I was shopping with my friend and a client saw me. He's a very nice, polite, outgoing guy and I noticed him too. But, I kept walking and didn't acknowledge him. He sprints up to me, "HEY ANYA! How have ya been? I emailed you a few hours ago!" My 19 year old friend I was with asked, "How do you two know each other...Anya...?" The fastest excuse I could come up with was he worked with my dad.

Totally unacceptable!

Two approaches:

1)  During the Cold War we called it "Assured Mutual Destruction".  If either the U.S. attacked the USSR or vis-a-versa, there would be immediate recciprocity as the rockets were in the air before they hit their target.  In this situation the guy probably has as much or more to lose than you do.  This time he may be alone but the next time you run into him he may be with his wife.  I know you want to avoid conversation at that moment, but it might be better to get him into a quick, quiet conversation and warn him to buzz off.

2)  Treat it as you would any casual conversation with a stranger.  For example, I run into a complete stranger, a pretty girl 20 years younger than my daughter.  She's eating an ice cream.  I ask her, "Are you going to finish that whole thing yourself?"  We both have a giggle, get off the elevator at our respective floors, "have a nice day" and life's a bit brighter for both of us (and everyone else in that elevator) that day.
On the other hand, suppose I knew her from a clandestine relationship.  We could go through the exact same script with the exact same result.  I know it doesn't always work this way, but try assuming he isn't intentionally out to harm you.  Chill out and cool him off with a quiet well placed word (it doesn't hurt if others overhear you telling him, "stop following me around and leave me alone") or try cooling the situation off with humor.

I try to act as if I don't see them and pray that they don't come up to me in case my kids are nearby. I would never go up to a client out of fear that I would get him in trouble and I expect the same courtesy. I have seen several clients out with their families and I do my best not to make eye contact so they don't feel anymore uncomfortable than necessary.

The "Board Nazis" are much more annoying then repeat topics. (BTW, I looked at your site link. OMG, you are hot!)

to me yesterday.In an elevator.I was with family and my incall was at the hotel across the street.Well I guess the guy had stayed in the hotel my family was at.The guy striked up a conversation with my little ones.Ofcourse they're like who are you?Oh I'm a friend of your mommy.(I'm married by the way)so if you see me in public DO NOT EVER SPEAK TO MY CHILDREN!!!!!!!!!Unless you want to piss me off.

I've yet to have that problem because I don't work near where I live or hang out at or shop at and so on.  If that ever happened I'll just give a nice smile hey how are you have a good day kind of gesture and keep it moving....hope any of them would have enough sense to know the deal and keep it moving too until the next time we meet when i'm working.