So I need some advice on what to do.

I am a relative newb.  I've had 3 providers total, all covered except for bbbj.

My SO and I have had a largely platonic relationship for 4 years now, and based on the conversations we had about it, she joked a few times that if AMPS offer HE, then she felt bad and maybe I should try it... she planted the idea in my head, so I did.  The AMP wasn't that great so I moved to providers.  

The last 2 weeks my SO's libido kicked in and we had sex a few times.  The day after doing it two times in a row, she says she thinks she has a unirinary track infection.  Comes back and says "the doctor thinks it may be chlymedia because of the back pain and leg burning sensation but when the doctor learned I'm married, she dropped it".  But she was tested.

I'm looking to find an anonomous place for testing ASAP for me.  But what should I do?  Wait until her or my test comes back?  Does anyone with more experience in this area think it might be more than UTI?  She gets them frequently and I think that is partially why we stopped having sex i nthe first place.  I won't get a divorce over this, but it certainly would be a bump I'd rather just avoid.

Try Requestatest.com

Well, if she she's an actual doctor(not planned parenthood), then her results will be back within 48 hours TOPS, so by the time you find a doctor yourself & make an appointment, her results will already be back. BUT, you should probably get tested regardless if it's been more than 3 months since your last test.

I was thinking of going to Planned Parenthood... will I get my results faster there than the 48 hours from a doctor?

I got my result back in 48 hours. Link provided below.

No, Planned Parenthood takes at least a week to get your results back.. a regular doctor will have results in 24-48 hours. Also, Planned Parenthood has cut funding, & will ONLY test you for gonorrhea(or chlamydia) now(can't remember which), & if that comes back positive, then they will do other tests on you... even if you ask for other tests, they won't do them, unless you tell them you have been exposed(this is in WI, so it may be different where you are at).

Go to your doctor & get tested.
Don't panic.  Don't confess anything...  at least not yet.  There will be time for that after you have facts.  Lots of women get frequent UTIs due to sex.  The cross contamination with own bacteria is the most common.  
It's really tough but you must remain calm.  
As for where, Google STD testing & see what is available locally.
HV

I contracted a very aggresive antibiotic-resistant strain of Chlamydia in Thailand. A day or so after coming home, my eye was as red as an apple, dripping pus and my vision was essentially gone in that eye.

I saw five diferent opthlamolgists, a Target clinic nurse and my general doctor before it was properly diagnosed. My first few doctors called it severe pink eye and gave me antibiotic drops even though they felt 99% it was viral.

The next doctors gave me Amoxicillin and told me that it was viral. There was no response to the treatment. Then the doctors tried to say it was a severe allergic reaction. So I thought, at least it's not an STD.

I had two sessions with two providers after this and I only did bbbjcim since I was afraid of any potential allergic reaction or infection. I was told it ws only severe allergies and not contagious.

I went back to the doctors and complained that something has to be wrong here after there was no improvement. I saw another doctor in the practice and he was asian and told me he saw this before. He cultered it and it was Chlamydia that was transmitted to my eye via vaginal secretions or rubbing of the eyes. It took a combination of Azithromycin, Doxycycline and Tetracyline to cure.

Get tested for Chlamydia ASAP and wash your hands while using antibacterial gel after touching your penis. You most likely will have infected your partner if you do have Chlamydia since the transmission rate is very high compared to something like HIV. I think it is aboove 50% for one act of unprotected contact with an infected partner.

I understand why providers are sometimes hesistant to provide bbbj, bbbjcim or cum on face.

YIIIIKES!  That sounds horrible....  I'm seeing my doc soon so I'll get tested, unless I hear something from my wife that's bad, then I'll do it sooner.

Please ask your doctor to specifically test you for Chlamydia if you think that is the STD. I wish I knew back then what I know now.

Doctors are not always as smart as you would hope they would be. The opthalmologist that finally correctly diagnosed me was from the Phillipines and he knew how dangerous Chlamydia is to the eyes based on all his years of experience practicing medicine in SE Asia.

Without quick treatment, Chlamydia transfered to the eye causes severe scarring of the eye's conjunctiva. At this point the disease is called Chlamydia Trachoma. The eyelids with scar tissue cause abrasions on the corneas resulting in cornea scaring. Corneal scarring blinds. The final progression is the inversion of the upper eyelid to rub the surface of the cornea. The eyelashes scrape the cornea making it opaque and the patient permanently blinded in the eye.

A chlamydia infection is serious and needs attention. In my opinion, I would rather be dead from AIDS than permanently blinded by Chlamydia since it would not be a life for me to want to live in.

you would be remiss in not sharing that with your own doctor.  And, don't wait.  Going after an infection right away is always better than waiting.

If you and you SO start having sex again after a gap, most likely diagnosis would be "Honeymoon cystitis", due to vigorous sex,  usual bug would be E coli or similar normal gut flora. This wouldnt be something that implies youve been screwing around with other women. The doc shouldn't think of Chlamydia first. So i wouldnt confess to anything. But you should get tested for chlamydia and possibly GC. Her doc could be right.

"Honeymoon cystitis"  The usual suspect bug would be E coli or similar normal gut flora.  
Exactly what I was saying.

A friend of mine confided that practically every time he & his wife had sex...  she got a UTI.  He was not a happy camper!
Yes, UTIs are generally an E.Coli strain.  It seems that women have slight variations in body construction (viva le differance!) and body chemistry which can lead to susceptability in some individuals.  Both party's privates AND hands AND any other part that makes contact should be scupiously clean prior to sex (fresh out of the shower is good, hand showers are very useful) & urinating immediately afterward is generally recommended as well.  

After this all blows over...  & it likely is just a normal UTI...   You & wife should try to use best practices for cleanliness to prevent a recurrance.  

Do let us know how you make out.

I had a UTI...  when it first started, no knowing what was going on, I made sure my AFT was aware.   She was sure as she'd been tested since our last get together.  So I kept my mouth shut & wentto my doctor.   But ATF shared a story...

This guy devoluped a rash on is privates.  In a fit of panic, he confesses all to his wife...  who promptly throws him out.
He had been a good husband...  been out raking leaves & busting his arse doing yard work.  He had needed to Pee.  It seems he'd come in contact with poison ivy.  RASH??  Hell yes!  So he was some time recovering...  by himself...  
All of this unnecessary if he'd gone to the doctor first.

you're mind fucking yourself.  And like the post above says NEVER rat yourself out dude !

I recently had a bout with UTI that was not responding to the antibiotics and the doctor said it might be an STD -  or it might be that the antibiotic they gave me just isn't doing the trick.  (I had recently been on antibiotics for something totally unrelated to this) and its possible my body had built up a resistance.   So they switched the antibiotic and said if that one doesn't work, the next step is to test for an STD.

The new antibiotic did the trick.

Its very possible your SO is just having a reaction to the antibiotic and needs a new drug.

Or she could have an infection caused by lotion, perfumey soap, or laundry detergent.

Unless she is told without a doubt her problem is caused by an STD, dont admit to anything.  Get yourself tested for your own peace of mind but dont be shocked if it comes back negative.

Jesus Christ man, deny it. Be a man and deny it.

If your SO walks in on you laying on top of a naked woman, you tell
her she was a nudist who came in to use the phone and you were just
trying to help her to keep warm

Deny everything and stick to your story.

-Become enraged, and accuse her of cheating "No WONDER you haven't wanted much sex..."
---pay off a lab tech to "give" you a negative test result (ooh, that's a good one)
-Quote obscure medical reports about chlamydia from toilet seats
-Insist she get a second opinion; delay, and lace her coffee with massive doses of antibiotics
-Fake a heart attack

I know that at least in Boston there are immediate testing sites that do anonymous or confidential testing. It's called same day testing, I would advise you to look up same day testing sites in your city or state. I know here that it costs around 90 dollars to get same day testing for each std (so 90 for chlamydia, gonorrhea, hiv etc). They like to test you for a variety of things and routine testing is usually carried out for chlamydia, gonorrhea, herpes 1 and 2, hepatitis C, HIV and syphilis. For everything it should come out to be around 600-700 dollars although I am quoting just from Boston. You'll receive your results in 30 minutes or one day depending on the clinic.

Now, if you go to your family doctor, there is a difference between confidential and anonymous testing. I don't believe that you can test anonymously with your family doctor and that means that your information will be reported to your insurance agency if it goes through your regular healthcare provider. Confidential testing is still reported to the government with your name on the results. Anonymous testing is completely anonymous and will not have your name, just your results reported for health reasons. Basically you're a number with anonymous testing and confidential testing is riskier and could be run by your insurance; ESPECIALLY if you see a family doctor. Some states don't have anonymous testing though so I wish you good luck.

Thanks everyone for the good advice.  I'm calmer now.  I'm just gonna wait and see what I come home to tonight and play it as it comes.  

Of course, this all could be a ruse to see if I jump out of my skinand test me to see  my reaction, lol.  If that's the case then I'm in trouble!  I don't have a poker face.  

I don't mind telling my doctor- I think he'd be more jealous than anything.  

LMAO!  I almost wet myself!  Much needed laugh - thank you! oxox

You have a wife, a SO, and 3 providers?

good news... it was just "vaginitis".  Whoow.  But it was really bad, painful and itchy, so the erotic honeymoon I found myself in was short lived.  She won't be opening those legs any time soon, sadly.    

I know she won't be too mad if she found out I was seeing providers on the side, but I think finding out by a "see-men-are-all-evil" gynocologist would not have been the smoothest method.  Hopefully something will open up where I can tell her and we can work it into our personal lives.    

She keeps saying that with all these problems maybe me having some outside help would be good and I said "sounds great, what flavor do you want?" and she replied a black girl because she knows I've dated black girls (I'm caucasian if you can't tell) and she's curious.  She didn't realize I was serious.... that'll take time to massage that message into her head.   Patience...    

Maybe during our next vacation I'll get the ball rolling !!!  Thanks everyone for helping me keep my cool!