Sometimes I enjoy a good slap across the face and being told that I don't deserve a blowjob, then getting a blowjob anyway. Then getting slapped again after for enjoying it.

I'm pretty tame compared to some of you, I'm sure.

I like some good kinky fun, food sploshing, for example.

I suppose to most people's thinking, golden showers would seem the most weird; it certainly was to me when I first encountered the practice.

It all came about quite naturally however.  I had a favorite at the time who was quite the vanilla gal, or so I thought.  She wouldn't even allow COB in fact (Though I cured her of that phobia 8o)

One day I came over to her place, and she was quite blotto.  I asked what was up with that and she responded that she had to tank up on a six-pack of beer for the previous client on account of him wanting a golden shower.  I hadn't even heard of the term at that point.  (This was about 5 years ago and I was a bit on the green side.)  So, anyhow, she explained to me quite graphically what was involved (swallowing and all!) as my jaws hung agape.  I was a bit put off by the thought of it but then my perverted mind began to process the whole idea and the next time we got together I requested the same treatment and became a fan for life.

This is more or less how it's been for many of my predilections since then, and is one of my fondest reasons for being in this whole hobby world.

There's another weird practice that one gal in particular practices on me but I am sworn to secrecy on that one. She knows who she is.  8o)

I like being called a dirty slut.  It's probably not super weird to me, but the first time a guy said that I was surprised when it turned me on.

Pissed on than pissed off. Thanks I'm here all week. Don't forget to tip your bartenders and servers.

I like a good GS. Prefer a muscular long legged lady. Diet coke works well.

...you know, just between "us girls".....?

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while on a date with a lithe brunette divorcee with tiny A-cups, we went back to her place.  

After watching a VHS rental and draining two bottles of white wine, we were making out on her sofa and things were getting really hot and it became evident that I was going to get lucky because I'd met zero resistance unbuttoning the crucial top button of her button fly jeans or unhooking her bra which clasped in the front.  After some heavy breathing and petting, she abruptly stopped because she said she really had to pee.  

For no reason other than it felt right, I followed her into the bathroom and we continued making out.  I was fully clothed but I undressed her from the waist down as we kissed our way to the bathroom.  She wasn't wearing panties, which was unknown to me while we were making out, but I quickly processed this information to mean that she wanted to fuck me even before we went to dinner and this turned me on incredibly and I got inexplicably daring.  

Nude from the waist down, she anxiously plopped down on the toilet seat but we never stopped kissing, and I thrust my hands between her legs.  She was apparently pee-shy and couldn't go while my hands and mouth were all over her.  Her labia were swollen, her clit was plumped up to the size of a kidney bean, and she moaned that she had to pee so much it hurt but wouldn't stop kissing me.  After a few minutes, of FIV and FIA, I lifted her up by the hair, turned her around and bent her over the toilet.  I quickly undid my pants (just a regular zipper for me fortunately) and pulled them down to my knees, and we had our first sex while she was bent over her toilet with a full bladder

I entered her pussy from behind, slid in all the way to my balls, and hit full speed within 2 or 3 strokes.  After pounded her for about 30 seconds, she started to pee in little spurts.  At 60 seconds, she began growling like a cat so I stopped pumping, thinking I was hurting her.  "Don't you dare stop," she hissed, so I went back to it, this time with a handful of her hair clenched into my fingers.  I pulled her hair down bending her neck up so that her chin was extended towards the over-sized mirror over the toilet.  I moved my face in next to her and watched her ecstasy of having me stuff her pussy.  

As she started cumming, her growl increased to a yell and she was finally able to let go of her bladder and was bucking her hips backward to meet each of my thrusts.  Her piss literally went everywhere, some into the toilet we were fucking over, but it felt like most of hit drained directly onto my balls.  The warmth of her stream on me was too much for me to take so I gasped that I was about to cum in her.  She told me to stick it in her ass and I tried but it was too late for me to get in and I painted her asshole with one of the biggest loads of my life.  

After I had finished, she was still shuddering violently and turned around to face me we continued DFK.  I sat her back down thinking I would  pleasure her with my hands but she took my cock into her mouth and began sucking on it, trying to milk what was left of my cum into her mouth.  I didn't notice that she was fingering herself at the same time until I heard her start cumming again.  During her next orgasm I felt her teeth around my shaft and it to an "OW, no biting!" for her to ease up.  

When we were finished, neither of us could stop laughing.  Her piss was all over my pants, my underwear, even my socks.  Fortunately we'd removed our shoes during the movie.  There was pee on the stomach of her black cotton top and my cum all over the back of her blouse.  We got her cleaning supplies and mopped up her bathroom, did a load of laundry, and had very relaxed and euphoric coffee.  

On subsequent dates, we had more more conventional sex, but never again attempted sex in the bathroom.  Of course I pressed her on it, but she told me that was the most erotic thing that had ever happened to her and didn't want to ruin the memory of it by trying to duplicate it again until we were married.  A few months later I found out she didn't throw her blouse in with the laundry, but rather hand washed and air-dryed the pee part on the front but saved my cum-caked stain on her black blouse in a plastic bag in one of her drawers.  I thought that was really weird, and it was also really weird that she brought up marriage as an incentive for more toilet sex.  

Not marrying her was probably one of the best choices  I'd ever made, but I still get turned on thinking about the first time we had sex.

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and that was one of the details I remembered.  Loved tending to them while our relationship laste

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