but why do providers say I'm good looking it's one thing to tell me I should have more confidence and another thing to tell me that you would actually pay me any mind in the real world. I mean sure I get comments on how young I look for my age from civie girls, but I generally don't regard those as comments towards my aesthetic appeal. I figure that's just one of the many attributes I inherited from my late father. Not that I don't appreciate it. It just doesn't help me in anyway whatsoever, the truth however will.

Most likely it's just to smooth things over. She may compliment you just to keep the Session at a comfortable level for both of you. just my 2 cents.

I get that but to tell me something I know isn't true based on feedback from civie girls. I mean it's partially the reason a guy my age is even in this hobby.

I'm not Good Looking either. But from time to time it's nice to hear a Woman say I'm Cute, even though I know it's not True. So just say Thank You and let it go. Hey without this Hobby I wouldn't have any chance in Hell of meeting girls either But then again even civie girls cost Money too. .

You have to put their comments into context of their previous appointment and their previous experiences.

But when a gal opens the door, they shriek out: "I wasn't expecting Brad Pitt!"

And I be lovin' it!

I hope, as a provider, I can give my $.02

Kathy Willets told me the same thing about clients C-o. She tried to focus on one thing she found attractive or interesting. One of her first clients was an obese guy. She told me she looked out the peep hole in the room and wondered "how am I going to do this". It's a coping strategy I suppose. As far as provider comments....we all look in the mirror and are usually our harshest critics  ( - :

Great response, Courtney.  I think we can find something attractive in just about everyone as well, and it does make things much better when we focus on what we like and not on what we dislike.  

It doesn't matter if he/she is a client or civ. I'm pretty genuine about it.
If I think someone is cute, I tell them - makes them feel good about themselves, who doesn't like hearing they're attractive?

That's nice.  I've had this discussion with several providers recently.  They know I'm a skeptic, even though they seem very genuine.  I just can't help taking it with a grain (or six) of salt.

See that I can get, telling me I'm a nice guy or I'm mature for my age sure I'll bite, I know haughtiness,  and vanity make many a girl unattractive no matter how well toned and/or pretty she is. I genuinely tell providers all the time if they look prettier than I expected from those blurred pics, or if I've seen pictures of them there is a real difference. I mean I think I look better in a mirror than I do in a picture of myself, guess I'm not photogenic
 

Posted By: Courtney.ova

I hope, as a provider, I can give my $.02  
   
 I love to focus on good features of men. I point out great qualities, and if I think they're attractive or have attractive features, I let them know... If I can't find physical features, I skip the subject or go right to their personable features. ...I'm also attracted to older men.  
   
 Confidence and charisma has always radiated attraction to me as well. Hot Hot Hot...  
   
 I used to get crushes on teachers, doctors, etc. all the time! Men my age or younger, yes, can be physically attractive, and yes they book... but I've noticed a different level of maturity and respect in most cases. Immaturity and a bad attitude will make even a high end model ugly, in my opinion. Maybe that's why I love doing this job, hehe...  
   
 *blushes*

That's my problem all of them are pretty damn sincere with there comments. Can't imagine why? I mean I flirted with girls before, but I only thought it was because I'm not a charmless robot, and somewhat cultured provided the only foreign countries I've ever visited were Mexico and Guatemala.

Well, like I, you've visited Kelly Martin!  That's gotta count for something.  What a hot little cutie!

well unfortunately she wasn't one of the ladies that gave me those comments, but Erin V, who I find entrancing at times did and consistently tries to tell me I have nothing to worry about, and Squirting Sarah who I found to be way prettier than her pics on her website made her out to be especially for her age. Though Kelly did tell me I was a good kisser, which is not far-fetched considering I had my first full on make-out session (with tongue I might add) when I was only six years old in my parents closet with the neighbor girl. That comment I get more often than not and unprovoked, actually the first girl to actually tell me that was porn star Vanessa Cage, and she was genuinely sincere, I mean I took that with a big grain of salt, but I got it more from more and more providers so at least I have that. So since it came from her I mean that definitely does count for something.

For example, I had a client that looked like Brad Pitt. Seriously. I'd give him compliments on being sexy and he would dismiss them. He was insecure and truly didn't think he was hot (those were his words). He'd probably do well in the civie dating game, if he had some confidence. Since not everyone wants to receive compliments, I no longer give them.

Thanks for that post, Courtney.  

As long as you don't say that I am "nice" because then I'll know you are lying. lol

Me too. You took the words right out my mouth ..

Posted By: Courtney.ova

I hope, as a provider, I can give my $.02  
   
 I love to focus on good features of men. I point out great qualities, and if I think they're attractive or have attractive features, I let them know... If I can't find physical features, I skip the subject or go right to their personable features. ...I'm also attracted to older men.  
   
 Confidence and charisma has always radiated attraction to me as well. Hot Hot Hot...  
   
 I used to get crushes on teachers, doctors, etc. all the time! Men my age or younger, yes, can be physically attractive, and yes they book... but I've noticed a different level of maturity and respect in most cases. Immaturity and a bad attitude will make even a high end model ugly, in my opinion. Maybe that's why I love doing this job, hehe...  
   
 *blushes*

Is when a client outright asks a lady if she is attracted to him. Had that done to me and it completely put me on the spot. Now I could have gone one of two ways, honesty and said no and risked losing money or lied and said yes to keep the flow of money coming in from this guy.

.. which way did you go ?

Of course I lied. He is a sweetheart though and I saw no reason to hurt his feelings or do myself out of money.

When a lady tells me I have nice eyes, or have strong hands, then I assume she is sincere and I like that. But if she tells me I have a big dick or a nice body, then she is lying, and I'd rather hear nothing, than a fake compliment.

The strong hands are the result of years of masturbation....or so I hear  

But the part about the strong hands, you definitely got right!

BUG eyes.

You can always tell a fake compliment from a real one by the way they say it. I feel I am doing a dis-service by lying about attractiveness... on the other hand, a man who asks probably longs to hear it from somebody... just to feel attractive for a moment, because he never hears it at home or out in the real world. Then I know, hopefully discerning right, to make their fantasy come true...

YUP! Someone damaged him. @ Spinman, this is what I was thinking was a possibility when I read the original post. Perhaps they are genuine, it just may not seem real to you. (Hope that wasn't too personal). The day I started taking compliments was the day I stopped looking in the mirror at 104 lbs 5'4" thinking I was too fat. Now I love my curves! hehehe

See that doesn't fly by me I'd rather she tell me the truth, since I can take it it's the reason I'm there in the first place. I don't lie to make people feel better about themselves, I may not be so blunt with the truth though I highlight other aspects/strengths rather than lie about something else.

That is definitely not fat, being 5'7" and 192lbs is fat, and yes maybe it is, but I never really thought highly of myself, having been rejected by all but a handful of women, which even then never got past the first date.

See exactly what I mean lying about that does me no good.

Do you find me physically attractive? A no might have meant he does not see me any more hence I lose money and this is not match dot com for me. Same thing if a guy asks me if he is good in bed. Who the heck is paying 3  to 4 bills to hear NO!.  

And I do respect you for that. BTW I am enjoying our back and forth. what if you asked a lady a direct question either am I attractive to you or did I make you come or am I good in bed. If she answered no to any one of these, would you come back and see her

Yah of course, I know for a lot of these women it's just a job and for them to be able to try to enjoy themselves with a smile on there face is good enough for me. But I don't ask those questions. I may make statements about being homely homunculus, because I don't care to know. Like I said things like "nice guy, smart, mature, well-spoken" sure those I can understand and have merit, but "good-looking, and cute" much less so given my experience with civie girls. Granted yes I'm year short of quarter-century, but I see what women my age want, and I don't have it so why try and fight it.

I know I'm a long ways from being asked to pose for a GQ cover shoot but sometimes the ladies mean it. I figure I'm ok looking at best but compared to most 60 year old dudes I might be a prize. Had a smoking hot gal walk in to my room one time and look at me and say "I just won the hooker lottery, this is gonna be fun!" I look at is as if I was playing basketball against 5 year olds. LOL!! The appointment did go over by about 3 1/2 hours OTC so I guess she meant what she said. Talk about a confidence boost!! Just enjoy it man it's cool to have you're ego as well as other things stroked!!

really 3.5 hrs? damn I mean I've some go for over an hour, but I figured we just really clicked and lost track of time. Yes I get that I'm a lot younger than most hobbyists and from what I hear bigger than most, I guess I can see where they are coming from. and I do enjoy it, but when they tell me that I could date and find civie girls, even urging me to pursue certain girls, it does kind of put me off since I don't like having my ego stroked, makes me feel conceited and vain. Though I have to admit when a hot young porn star says "you're a real good kisser" it does make me feel more confident at least in that regard.

Obvious BS is a turn off and I agree. That I will not do and during conversation if I do find something appealing about a client I will mention it. Going overboard just makes the escort look silly because you (collectively) guys are not stupid.

Well it wasn't all just going at it like animals. A lot of that though, but some kickass hangout time and dinner. Actually happened more than once. It's rare but it's awesome when it's like that. Never been accused of being large by a lady but I'm a fun guy I've been told. No fake ego stroking just going into things as a evening if fun and living in the moment.

Hi PS,

following the rule  
"nothing nice to say dont say anything" lol  

if they make size comment, yea unless it REALLY is big, sounds fake...