Yup, kids are rebellious at that age. Can you imagine what her son is feeling? He is has to accept that his mother is a provider, and he is at that age where he is aware of the social context, that is, the acceptable and unacceptable behaviors of society. He's going through some tough times right now.

He got it tough, that's no way to raise a kid, especially a son. Makes me thankful for my fortunate upbringing by loving and caring parents. I don't know why I turned out this way. That is, wasting all of my money on providers, although I live a productive life and contribute to society, and have a heart to care for people.

He is at that age where he will begin to search for independence because he can no longer accept that his mother is a provider. He doesn't want to go through the turmoil on a daily basis. It's a lot to take in and accept. Especially for his age, it must be very difficult for him to accept that his mom is seeing multiple men a day.

I wouldn't involve myself with that drama, it's too much baggage to take in. There can be many reasons for his rebellion, and his mother being a provider is definitely affecting his decision to misbehave. If you want to get involve, then be my guest. However, don't make it as the main focus of her being a provider is the number one reason as to why he is rebelling. Talk to her to find out what is causing it, then gradually ask her, does she think he is rebelling because of her occupation.

As a man, there is no greater dilemma, and nothing more shameful than finding out that your mother is providing. It totally hurts a man's emotion and consciousnesses. There is nothing greater than knowing that your mom is a provider, and I feel for the boy. He needs therapy. For this reason, providers should not inform their children that they are providing. As a hobbyist, I respect and enjoy this hobby and providers. However, because of its taboo, and society's expectations of such a hobby, it should be kept in the dark.

lock him out of the house first, take her car keys back and let him be independent on his own. The trouble is he knows her line of work and can cause problems making a bad situation worse.

I think her son is troubled by his mother's work and is made worse by how he found out. Was she upfront or did he find out by accident? If his friends found out, dealing with the stigma and emotional heartbreak from teasing he will receive from friends that his mom "is a whore" would be too hard to deal with.

Providing from home is a mistake, she should have used better judgement. Too many risks are involved.

I am the last to get involved with the personal lives of providers but here is a situation where I think you can help without getting overly involved.

She should stop providing if she can for a while, certainly not from home and let him know that she doesn't "provide" anymore. Let him know that he is now an adult and set some firm ground rules for living at home, no drugs or alcohol. Allow him to use her car with limits. Fixing the relationship with her son by having an open an honest discussion with him will help. Along the way she should encourage him to become an independent by going to college, tech school, work, getting a car and eventually moving out.

As he grows older he will understand or acceptance will set in but right now he needs her attention and is crying for help inside. You can help by putting yourself in his shoes and letting her know what is going on without getting too involved.

You could substitute doctor, stay at home mom, teacher or any other profession in this story and no one would blame the profession for his behavior... just if she's a provider.

I have known many, many women whose kids went through a downward spiral at that age who weren't providers. One coworker, a customer service manager, found her 19 year old son dying in his room after an overdose. He died in her arms. If she were a provider, you all would quickly blame it on that. But she's not, oh, so it must be something else. Well maybe if she's a provider, it's STILL something else!

Can you image discussing behind her back whether you should tell her that her son was having problems because she's a customer service manager (so it's her fault!)? How incredibly ignorant that would appear, right?

You guys are being incredibly narrow minded.

There are providers whose kids DON'T know they are providers who are having problems with their kids!

Raising kids is tough! Teens have all kinds of problems and issues and the common denominator is not "their mom is a hooker!"

You guys need to stop being arm chair psychologists and just mind your own business with how other people raise their children. You raise yours how you want to but you are in no position to give any insight or advice on how providers should be raising their children! You are not in their shoes! What is this, "Thank god I had loving parents BS?" As if providers aren't loving parents... are you for real?

And stop with the blanket statements about how all providers always get "found out" by everyone who knows them! That just isn't true!!! It can happen, yes, but it's not a given.

God, this ignorant, stupid shit makes me so mad! And now there will be a barrage of individual, isolated stories from guys about providers who were found out or who have problems with their kids in order too justify the assumption... NONE of which prove that these blanket statements are true!

But some of you love to pick at and find fault with providers in every way and for every reason possible, so it doesn't really matter what the truth is. For some of you, it only matters that there is something new to criticize.

Sure he might be upset she provides, but it could be something else.  First of all, telling him is one thing, providing from home puts it much more in his face, so I'd suggest she find another incall.  As for the kid, you have no idea what other factors might be causing him to act out.  Sounds like he's got a drug and alcohol problem that could have nothing to do with her providing.  Also sounds like there's no Dad around.  Not a good thing, either and you have no idea whether he play any role as a father figure.  I could go on, but you get the idea.

Now she's 21 and actually turning human again.  She doesn't know that I'm a provider, but she does know that I have a rather promiscuous streak.  She once found my stash of condoms and was a little horrified.  But that was just last year - after she had turned human again.  lol

She apparently could hear enough & guess the rest.  Daughter was grossed out & just upset...  I apparently was not the first & certainly not the last to be entertained in Mom's bedroom.  (If she could have held off a few weeks, the sex basically stopped but by then she was established at the grandparents.)
This situation is a disaster.  She needs to at minimum move her business off the premisis & cut it down so it's not happening during times he might be home.  I do know providers who entertain no more than 1 client per day...  from home...  during school hours & no one the wiser.  

As a client, it is not your place to play shrink.  You can hint but a lesson I had to learn is that the end of the day it's not our call nor our decision.   It is between parent & "adult" child...  this could blow up in her face...  and you don't want to be too close.
H

WTF would you tell her?

Quit, for the good of your son? Lie, and tell him you quit?

My parents got divorced in my early teens and my Mom had an active sex life after that. She was shy, but horny. Since she really did not have any other friends, she decided it was a good idea to tell me about her sex life. Which I hated, and I got away from her as quickly as I could (never lived at home after 16). The whole thing was creepy as hell for me. And not because we were living outside some social norms either - the whole problem was that my Mom creeped me out to start, and to know she was having sex was way over the top disgusting for me.

No question that I was acting up before I left. But was it because she was fucking around? Ended up spending a fair amount of time in counseling to get over some of that crap, and I do not believe her sex life ever came up. Not once. It was an easy and obvious thing to focus my anger on at the time, but that was because it was safe, not really scary like the shit that was really bugging me. At that age, your parents are a mortal embarassment no matter what they do.

Sort of ironic that this group immediately blames providing for a kid's problems, assuming we know the exact cause without ever meeting the kid, or knowing much about the situation.

My advice - shut up. You have no idea what the problem is, and should not offer advice or opinions unless asked in any case. Just because you know A and B does not mean A caused B. It is not a great stretch to believe Mom had her own rebellious and substance abuse issues, which would explain why son is reacting that way to his stress. Even if Mom removed this stress, that age is stressful and son needs to learn how to manage stress and take care of himself.

No angel Here and as a single mom, I had to put a boot up his ass!

The short story!
I was a hell cat from 14 on.... you name it I did it and was scared of nothing..
I am so lucky to be alive and not in prison... I turned my life around with the blessings of my children and vowed I would never ever let them do the things I did. BECAUSE I LOVED THEM!
I am not saying your friend does not love her kid.. But TOUGH LOVE IS THE BEST KIND..
I had no rules and no boundries and not a soul in this world who was there to guide me.. all I really wanted was someone who belived in me and someone who was there to guide me with love.........

I recently kicked my 19 year old son old of the house.. it was hard but one day I am going to be dead and one day he is  going to have to follow rules and get along in the world and the world is hard and cruel and will not make excuses for him..

My son is a good kid for the most part.. but... I Have rules and he lived a damn good life because I worked my ass off to give it to him.. He obviously thought he could have as much and do it on his own... Today he is driving a scooter, needs a haircut. but did just get a job and misses home ...He can come home as soon as he can follow the rules..

TELL YOUR FRIEND. YOU MAY BE SAVING HIS LIFE.......................... It is easy for kids to find love and acceptance in all the wrong places and by then it may be too late..

A little bit of pain along the way is much better then a lifetime of heartache...........

The most important factors were the ways in which he experienced her as a mother during his childhood, and especially during his infancy and early childhood.

As far as her job goes, it is realistic to acknowledge that there is a stigma attached to sex work, and that he will have to deal with the stigma, just as she does, if/when her job becomes known to others.   The stigma is the result of ignorance and is very unfair, but it still exists.

The more pressing concern is the possibilty that he has become a substance abuser.  He is an adult, and can seek professional help if he chooses to.  His loved ones can encourage him to do that.  

Professional counseling can also be helpful to both the mother and son in making their relationship a healthier one.  Going separately to their own therapists would probably be more helpful than going together to a single counselor for both.

how un comfortable for the son. that stinks. wow that be like every sons worst nightmare. Most sons are already very protective of there mothers. Oh dear. I would say maybe she should come out the blue with sorry son, i stopped today, SAnd from there on out call only and dont let the poor kid know. That def drive a kid to insanity, oh my god,