will always be unsubstantiated opinion. A point of view, really. An objective analysis cannot be accurately qualified nor quantified. The two are simply not truly comparable.

BTW, I am not implying that you are stupid for asking it. I'm sure it has popped into every hobbyists head.


HH

Except in the case of a wife.  There you get what you ask for, and believe you me, I was asking for it.

I recently had a girl friend for about six months.  On the basis of cost (meals, entertainment, gifts and some "helping her out a bit") the sex wasn't that expensive, but on the other hand, the quality was quite poor.  (She just laid there.)

I'm sticking with the hobby.

Sure paying an escort for sex every day would be rather costly but I don't need or want sex every day. Nor, at this point in my life, do I want a relationship with a woman who wants to get serious, move in, wants kids, wants me to help her with her kids or, in short, wants or expects any sort of a future in exchange for having sex with me.  

I would suspect that, like me, guys who think it's "cheaper" are simply not looking to be involved in a relationship at this point in their lives.

I see this reason a lot.

Hobbying is less expensive than a girlfriend.

Is this really true, provided you find a girl who enjoys having sex daily?  I don't know if I've been lucky (as I typically consider myself a loser), but none of the girlfriends I've had before the hobby really had a problem with having sex at least once a day.

Now if we say that an escort is $300... That's $9000 a month for daily sex, or $4500 a month for sex every other day.  Does the typical girlfriend really cost more than either of those figures?

Discuss?

but if you require daily sex then there's no way it's less expensive than a real GF.  OTOH, if you're talking about marriage, especially the cost of divorce, the hobby is much cheaper if you have any assets.  Besides, the ability to see lots of different women is priceless.

...for all the reasons you mentioned. In same cases more. My last long term GF, 3 years, was a gem. She looked like a young Jennifer Connelly (before she got too thin) and she was ready to bang at any given moment. She was an LMT at a chiropractors office, so free massages. She could drink like a sailor and insisted on throwing down half the bill at the end of a night out. She was bi and we frequented swinger's clubs, thus a steady stream of new girls in the mix. Cheaper then escorts? Hell yeah.
 On the other hand, if a guy is wine and dining different women week after week on a monthly basis, but rarely or never closing the deal, then the hobby may be cheaper.

It depends on:

A)  What do you do with your GF?  

B)  How often do you see your GF?

C)  How long does it take your GF to finally "put out"?

D)  How quickly can you swap GFs and get back to the good stuff?

E)  How little effort do you want to put into things?


Here's how I view it:

1)  If I am going out on a date, I am going out on a DATE.  That means dinner downtown overlooking the Chicago River or Lake Michigan.  It means a show (as in multiple people acting in a live setting like a musical, opera, or whatever - not a movie).  It means a limo, not a cab or a train - parking downtown SUCKS anyway.

2)  It's generally going to take 4 or 5 dates before getting the fun stuff anyway, from a civilian, primarily because with a civilian, I would want way more than just something superficial.  


The cost of #1 plus the time of #2 is going to be far in excess of the cost of just hiring someone to meet my physical needs immediately.

Now, add in certain other factors:

A)  I have a SO.  That means I really don't need a mistress showing up at 3am pounding on my door.  While I no longer have romantic feelings for my SO I do have kids, and they deserve at least what appears to be a happy home life.

B)  I have at least some confidence that an escort is going to screen herself for VD and get treated - if treatment is an option.  The sluts who would actively seek out a married man and screw up his home life probably do not have the mental agility to figure out they might have a VD.  VD, at least as many of them are concerned, is something that happens to other people.  Right, whatever...

C)  Escorts, shouldn't, inflict you with drama.  Honestly, I think all a mistress is really interested in IS drama!  Been there, tried that, has not really worked out well!  All of the escorts I have been with pin a smile on their faces and actively attempt to make me happy.  Sure, it's probably all been fakery, and?  You don't think that civilian you've been banging really thinks you're gods gift to female pleasure, do you?  Seriously?  Yea, I didn't think so!

D)  I don't know about you, but I've always found it annoying to trade in an older model civilian for a newer one!  "Sorry lass, but you're 36 now, I'm going to trade you in for two 18 year olds."  Oh yea, that conversation is going to go REAL well!  You stop seeing an escort, then there is no real blowback.  At least, I've yet to encounter any blowback from just not calling a girl for a second, twelfth, thirtieth encounter, not like seeing a civilian three or four times and then not calling again.

Monetarily? Depends. Doubt you would see a provider daily, unless you're Gambler or Beefeater or something.

But when you have a civvie, you have the same pussy allday and allnight, if she'll let you have it. And don't forget all the trappings of that sort of arrangement. Buy a house, have kids, put up with the inlaws(married or not, they're still inlaws). Not to mention the 'do I look fat in this' sort of shit and you sit there and say 'no, dear' when you're thinking 'I didn't realize how much fat can be stuffed into such a small dress'. lol!

Guess what I'm saying is, what is YOUR time worth?

Remember, you don't pay to fuck providers. You pay them to leave. Whereas the civvie never leaves.

Myself, I'm kinda set in my ways. No one to tend to but the dogs, and when I want to get it wet I can answer an ad or make a call.

Time IS money. And my time is too precious to be spending it with someone I don't want to be with for an extended period of time.

seriously funny thanks 4 sharing & making me smile! xo

And divorce would be the likely outcome of getting a girlfriend, because she would inevitably get jealous and stupid and would cross the boundary into your home life.

Mongering is more expensive fuck for fuck than a girlfriend.  However the money paid in mongering greatly reduces but doesn't eliminate female drama.

Provided you aren't a loser most guys can find a woman to fuck.  However mongering enables you to see multiple women with the only stings the money you pay.

Its a different means to pussy,  if you want it without strings then you pay prostitutes to fuck them.  If you want friendship or relationship with all the baggage get a girlfriend.

Well, lets see.  Before I met my wife, I lived with 2 buddies in an apartment that cost us each $165/month rent.  We split utilities at abut $75/each total.  I spent almost nothing on food, maybe $200/month.  I was never a heavy drinker and most of my social life was spent playing beach volleyball.  My car payment was $250/month.

Now, my mortgage is $2650/month.   Utilities average over $500 with unneeded cable, etc.  Our grocery bill is over $600/month, car payment $425.  We finally dropped the private school when it raised to $600/month per boy (x2).  We easily spend another $400-500+ on sport teams, gymnastics, scouts, etc.  My social life is somewhat rare, but expensive, at dinners 2-3x/month at $100+ each.

So...
I was spending around $500/month B.W. (Before Wife)

I'm now spending close to $5000/month in marriage.  We've had sex twice this calendar year so far.  Well, I did, she just laid there.  

Obviously, I'm 16 years older now.  I wouldn't be living in a cheap apartment anymore, even single so this isn't entirely accurate.  Also, the kids raise my bills a lot, but they kind of go hand in hand.  

I could easily spend 10 or so nights each month with a provider and come out ahead financially.

Well, first of all, we're assuming you're 45-55 years old dude and you going out with a pretty 22 year old girlfriend, who is somehow financially dependent on you for her car, rent, etc..  And how many nymphos are there who will want daily sex with a guy like you?  You need to ask that question.    

If your GF is 50-55 years old, then no - because she'll probably be paying lunch to go out with you, so you can go down on her.

Now, if your assumption is that you have a rich girlfriend who is the one giving you allowances, then No.
I mean if my girlfriend was Megan Fox or Paris Hilton or Brittany Spears and they need sex everyday ... I'd be getting thousands of dollars allowances from them.  But dream on buddy .. looking for a pretty rich girl with lots of cash is the stuff of dreams.  These girls also look for guys with wads of cash to buy them expensive gifts.

ended with bankrupsie.  Figuring sex at a dozen or so...  dead fish f*cks the first weeks...  after that it was once a month.  At that rate it was $2500 per.   To be honest, I don't think you can look at it that way...
I am in favor of a GREAT civie relationship with lots of great sex.   Pay4play keeps you from being totally crazy-horny & settling for a BAD civie.  

Women use sex to catch a guy...  and make her babies...  other than that motivation (hormones), I believe your typical woman doesn't like sex.  

Wait, MP67, civvies leave too, but they take half your stuff!

I am so with you 110% my "SKB" brutha !!!

You are not alone in those circumstances...she once told me when another couple broke up over his infidelities that if I ever did that " she would make sure I would be living in a cardboard box " when she got done with ME !!!

Well she wasnt totally succesful but close lol...but that was almost 7 years ago and I am still paying through the nose. But know cardboard box !!

Hobby on my brutha's

I got the house, the dogs, and the bills.

And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Ha ha ha... I find your calculations quite informative.   We all know the situation.   The money you spend as a married family man is way more than what you spend as a single man.   However, once we are in the marriage/family world, we try to make the best of it.   In my case, I still have a good sex life at home but I always feel that for the money I spend, I am getting shortchanged.   Therefore, the providers give me the variety I need to keep myself sane.

My first one cost me more than $100K and that's not counting the child support which I was glad to pay.  Thank God she got re-married before it reached $150K!  Still, I have to differ with you on women and sex, although I read a lot on this board about women who just cut their husbands off.  My first wife liked sex but it went bad when our overall relationship cooled.  She claimed to have hot sex with her first boyfriend after that (and thanks, dude, for marrying her so I could stop writing those alimony checks!).  My second wife is still horny but we're not that way for each other.  As much my fault as it is hers.  Through my second wife I hear a lot about what her friends tell her about their strong sex drives. So my opinion is many women are extremely horny but it's hard to sustain a strong sex life over years of marriage.
PS:  It's spelled "bankruptsy."  LOL!

hmm ... do most men think of their girlfriends primarily as a vehicle for sex?  that's the feeling i get sometimes.  perhaps i am just being oversensitive.

i do not necessarily believe that girlfriends are more expensive from a purely monetary perspective.  a different sort of investment is required.  that of your time, love, compassion, & patience.  a healthy, loving, uplifting relationship is not necessarily always a breeze to maintain.  relationships can seem downright exhausting at times - maintaining the delicate balance of meeting the needs of both (or all, in unconventional relationship structures) people involved to their satisfaction; and dealing with the idiosyncrasies of your mate (we ALL have them), which may not always be all that sexy.

so, in terms of emotion and energy investment, paying for sex is probably a LOT cheaper.  financially, i'd say that a girlfriend is probably cheaper.  however, there is a sort of payoff with a girlfriend, if you find a good one.  you have her unconditional love, her support, her loyalty and trust.  no matter what you may go through, you never have to go through it alone.  when you feel weak, she is there to lift you up; when you are unwell, she is there to nurture you back to health; and just knowing that you have her there can sometimes make a rough time much easier.  you have someone to explore with, pursue mutual passions with, perhaps grow a family with if you are interested, etc. etc. etc.

so... i guess it depends on what you want.

You'd have been grinning from ear to ear every morning before work! Tired, but smiling!

Oh, the irony!  You are quite right to point this out.  I win the Jerk Award for that one!  Sorry!