Hi,
I've been out of the game for some time. While I've had my fair share of cunnilingus sessions in the past (in fact is my sole purpose in a session), now that I want to come back, I'm freaking out I could catch herpes by going down on a girl.

I know the risk are very low and in general a girl wouldn't be working if she has sores, but the chances of spreading herpes is still there without the sores/lesions/ulcers.  

What's your opinion on this? I'm looking to find a regular for some light bdsm/foot fetish/facesitting and nothing else but now I'm freaking out I will catch something.

Note: I would love to hear the opinion of both providers and clients on this.

....but unless you want to use a dental dam, there will always be a risk, albeit a small one, of contracting something. This is not a hobby for the faint of heart. I both perform and receive daty at every session, and I think about it sometimes afterwards and swear that the next time I will bring dental dams. But I never do. TBH I don't really like using them. I don;t like how they feel either giving or receiving. But if a provider ever insisted in using one during a session I would abide by her wishes, of course.  

If it would make you feel better and safer, then a dental dam would allow you to have your cake & eat it too

here are many forms of reward. For me it includes the sex, conversation, and rapport with providers I become regulars with. The ladies are taking a risk as well and they have to assess whether it is worth the reward.

But seriously, as long as you stick to the better class of escort and not SWs or BP girls you should be fairly safe. Yes, there is a risk, but any TER girl would quickly be outed via Back Chanel.  

Relax and enjoy yourself. Your angst is going to work against you and ruin an expensive session so you may want to come to terms with it now. I love DATY and usually work it into a session. I figure if I'm not going to go down on a woman because I'm concerned ... Then I'm sure as hell not fucking her.

I save DATY for the ladies I'm really attracted to, I find all the women I meet sexy. I just really need to be turned on
if I'm going to indulge.  

I find that most ladies aren't that passionate when it comes yo kissing. I really need to be turned on if I'm going to enjoy myself, and you can forget about DATY.

That doesn't have anything to do with STD risk, I'd say the more partners you have and the more you participate in sexual activities, the greater your chances are of catching a STD.

I'm not sure if being reviewed is a definitive way of identifying a lady who has no possibility of having, and spreading a STD, lets just be real for a moment.
 

the wrong hobby if you don't think you cab catch something! It can happen to anyone regardless of how clean!

What then, oh Yoda?  

 
LMFAO!!!  (I'm in a weird mood this morning.)

 

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxo

it was uncomfortable for a while.

She's one of the 'better class of escort' who provides BBFS?  

I've known some ladies who are providers AND bar sluts AND consistently provide BBFS...just sayin'

How can you tell the BSP, from the average bar slut, or the average provider?

I think you are being a bit judgmental here, which is fine because I'm going to judge to person I plan on having sex with, since my health is at stake.

I thought I saw a provider that charges $1,000+ an hour working the local SW scene. Was it her?.. Was she working?.. Anything is possible... Just sayin.

I'd offer her a drink...😛

Duh ... Bar sluts don't use condoms. Ever try to open one of those when you're drunk?

I drink bourbon old fashioneds.    

 
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

open one drunk...I can even apply one with my mouth, drunk...but, I am a professional You might say I've had some practice.

The point is, that you can't know how clean or safe somebody is by where they advertise, or whether they are/aren't a UM* girl/high-end provider/random bar slut.  

I know some bar sluts I'd think are (probably) intelligent enough to use condoms (but, I've seen enough to never allow myself to be surprised). I know some providers I wouldn't touch with my bare hands (and they are not the ones on UM*). And vice versa.  

It's the individual person's choices and practices that makes him/her safe/unsafe. NOT where they advertise, or 'work' out of.

*UM = unmentionable site

-- Modified on 11/29/2015 11:18:05 AM

Funny. I keep good bourbon in the house, but my last guest said she drank Scotch and that my Woodford Reserve was too "harsh". So my next liquor run included a decent bottle of Scotch. Too "perfumey" for my plebian palet.
 

Let's drink together!

I had been out for a while, too.  Got back in.  

Did DATY and then got very concerned about what that exposed me to even though I had no symptoms.

So, I headed to the STD clinic at a prestigious Boston hospital to understand the risks (my GP was not well informed and was out of date, I later found out).  

Bottom line it is very possible (and frequently seen) to get HSV1 and HSV2 from DATY.  The majority of people (60% depending on demographic) already have HSV1 antibodies but it often doesn't present symptoms.  When it does present it can do so either orally or genitally.  The incidence of HSV2 is lower and it also presents orally or genitally.

The challenge in terms of protecting against transmission is that recent research has shown that most people shed the virus only when they show symptoms but that might not yet be physically evident to others (lesions) and even then the lesions might not be obvious.  The idea that a provider will refrain from activity including receiving DATY, I think is unrealistic.  Worse, the most recent research (2014-15) has also showed there is a small percentage (5-10%) of infected people who are constantly shedding even though they are asymptomatic.  They may or may not know they have one or both of the viruses and they are totally asymptomatic.

So, the terrible news is, unless you are prepared to get HSV1 and HSV2, you shouldn't be doing DATY unprotected.  Same with BBBJ since the provider can have HSV1 and/or HSV2 orally.

The upside is that even if you "get" HSV1 or HSV2, it doesn't mean you will ever present symptoms.  A minority of people do.  But, again, you could still transmit it to others.

Many people have antibodies (have been exposed) to HSV1 and/or HSV2 but don't know their status unless they happen to be symptomatic.  Doctors claim that infection rates in providers are very high, whatever that means.

Doctors will tell you not to test for HSV1 because it is so common that it then creates a burden of whether you tell your partners or not.  So, they say it is better not to know.

Anyway, I hope that helps some people make informed decisions.

Sorry that this is a total drag because DATY is so great!  I will only do CBJ and have stopped DATY for now, but I can't say I am happy about that.  I really miss the DATY and it is so hard to resist.