My ex and I were together since high school almost fifty years ago. We divorced four years ago.
This summer, my ATF of the last three years retired. Every day since I've thought about her, and felt a little blue knowing I won't see her again.
It's strange that I don't miss my ex, but I miss my favorite provider.
Not obsessed, but I do miss a petite Latina whom I had a fun time with. Have moved on and a new ATF has come along.
participated in the decision to divorce, whereas when your ATF retired and stopped seeing you, it was solely her decision. Accordingly, you feel like you have unfinished business with her. Find a replacement, and these feelings will pass.
It could be that you had a strong connection or she moved you in such a way. Of course only you would know. But where there are genuine mind and body connections between two people, the absence of one will surely be felt.
You'll find another genuine, loving, fun and exciting gal to pep you up, and perk up your ... smile. 
Xoxo
Alexa V.
Posted By: AlexaV
It could be that you had a strong connection or she moved you in such a way. Of course only you would know. But where there are genuine mind and body connections between two people, the absence of one will surely be felt.
You'll find another genuine, loving, fun and exciting gal to pep you up, and perk up your ... smile.
Xoxo
Alexa V.
Yep. I've seen providers more attractive than her, and ones who were better performers. There was just something about her that was special. I'd see someone else, but that someone didn't compare, and I'd go back to my favorite again.
I know she didn't value me any more than any other john, but I enjoyed the time I had with her. I'm looking for another provider to click with.
I'm sure she valued you as well. No need for comparisons really, you vs other johns/her versus other providers. We have such a short time to enjoy the moments that connections are made in. So when sparks fly, enjoy the show. Right? What you had with her sounds like it was beautiful. Even more beautiful that those kinds of connections can be had, as long as the chemistry facilitates such a bond. People are always coming and going but memories last forever and nostalgia provokes those good 'ol feelings. Cheers to the ladies and gentleman who care about genuinely connecting. Whats that saying? ... People rarely remember the things you tell them but always remember the way you made them feel?
Xoxo
Alexa V.
sadly, some time you do remember both... how they made you feel .... AND what they said
But usually when a LTR ends, especially one as LT as yours, it's been bad for some time. Usually the relationship has been dead before it is actually over.
With your former ATF, you were still connected and happy and only remembering good times, then it ended suddenly. I don't know what happened between you and your ex, but I'm guessing you saw the end coming for some time and got ready for it as you grew apart.
Also, what Alexa said about connections, that makes sense too.
Handle. I don't think any of us know him.
My ATF is still in the biz but she actually lived with me over the summer. I met her while traveling some time back and she came up to stay with me. Best of times, worst of times. She had some things she was working through and i provided a soft place to land for awhile. Unfortunately she did some things that really disrespected me and I had to ask her to leave. I know it was the right decision but I still miss her. I was pretty pissed off at first and should have given her some more time to get her act together before putting her out and I apologized for that, but she is still pissed off at me. Unfortunate as I would still like to see her when I travel to her city. Think about her every day........
... for something to go wrong, cracks become canyons, and to reach the point of no return
Seeing a beautiful, wonderful woman periodically, which just enough in between to miss her, well let's just say there's plenty of room for lot's to go right.
I hope you get back in the saddle soon
I know it is in my case.
Having hobbyed for over 40 years, there are more than a few ex-favorites whom I still pine for.
But, that's part of the biz. I wouldn't change a thing
I think about my retired atfs all the time, and hope they're all doing well.
There was one lady who just moved to another part of the country that was my first provider. She has a smile, a glint in her eye and that little voice "yeah, yeah, yeah!" when she is about to cum that just cranked my chain.
Miss her a lot.
Like my previous relationships, you never replace them. You just go somewhere else and enjoy that other lady's special traits.
I probably will miss all my regular ladies, that is why they are regular.
This is so much fun!
-- Modified on 11/18/2016 10:01:48 AM
I hope to build a bond like that with each of my clients like that!
After reading several of your posts, lotsa luck.
That when a provider retires, they stop advertising, stop taking new clients? I'm surprised to hear that they stop seeing regulars as well. I guess it makes sense for those that go back to the traditional world of monogamy. Me, I just cannot imagine! lol.
I miss my ATF client, he moved to London for work three years ago we talk every now and then but it is hard being in different time zones. We saw each other twice a week-then he moved. I still miss him. My ex fiancé of 5 years doesn't even cross my mind-ever-except ...now..eww! Anyway someone will roll around a better and greater version of your ATF I promise!
Ex-bf either! Dodged that bullet like a Ninja!
EOM
-- Modified on 11/19/2016 3:47:01 PM
There are a few ex-gf's I wonder about... where there was still potential there. In most cases, they had run their course. I'd like to have a couple of do-overs with them.
