Seems I do this more and more frequently....
Basically, I like to get a good sense of chemistry, similar backgrounds, outlooks, personality, interests, etc. Really not worth my time emailing, scheduling, meeting, etc, to see someone who is not one who gets me charged up......
Nothing like the 3-4 favorite clients I always have ongoing.... and always 1-2 that are tops.
Very picky about whom I see.... have my own ways of vetting... see men only to my liking.... must have a good vibe, be well-screened, decently attractive, successful, very bright, and intersting....
So recently sent a reply-message stating something like 'currently tied up through the next two months' meaning, as you suspect, not likely it will happen.....
Would rather be with my regulars, my g/f's, family, business friends, than have a night baring all with a sketchy guy I have my doubts about....
Don't know much about you, but sounds like you make an effort to vet out the bullshit. Good for you. Although I enjoy meeting new personalities in this hobby, nothing displeases me more than the occasional dipshit who is absolutely devoid of any substance.
Good luck to you.
As long as you bring something special to the event, that's a good plan. If it's average service easily found elsewhere you're in trouble.
If you are getting out of this hobby exactly what you're looking for (money, a realtionship, fantasy encounters, etc)then good for you! Don't sweat these things, as they present you as a person with a high moral standard. I know that sounds funny in this hobby, but there are enough providers out there who are looking to book as many appointments in a day as possible. I do enjoy forming a sort of bond with the providers I choose to see. It's your life & you are entitled to only see men to your liking, just as hobbyists, we are free to see providers we'd like.
"as hobbyists, we are free to see providers we'd like."
Not quite, as I decline at least 50% who email me initially, and more later..... But thanks for your kind reply.
On two occasions providers stopped seeing me without so much as a "no thanks". On one occasion they just didn't show up after making a definate appointment, the other never called to confirm an appointment. To this day I have no idea as to why I got this treatment. Both providers are out there going strong. In any case, I would have appreciated a call along the lines of "you're just not right for me" rather than the uncerimonious brush off that I got. So I endorse what you do. It shows class
There are lots of women available out there that will see those who you reject, for whatever your reasons. I personally would not want to be stuck in a room for one second with a lady that is not into giving me the best she has, would rather spend my money elsewhere.
I occasionally see posts by hobbyists that get rejected for a variety of reasons from race to basic looks. Often the posts are venting, but instead of venting they should recognize that for every lady that rejects them, there are five that will be glad to see them. I have lived by that last observation over the last three years and have met incredible women from Fins, Swedes, Dutch, German to Latin American and African American - all were great. So when I have the misfortune of meeting a lady that has restrictions of any type, I wish her well and move on. I have cash to spend hobbying and prefer to spend it on ladies that share my social values.
Mac Davis - "Oh Lord, it's Hard to be Humble, when you're perfect in every way"
The Cure - "Why Can't I Be You?"
MC Hammer - "U Can't Touch This"
Right Said Fred - "I'm...Too Sexy for myself"
Missing Persons - "I am one of the Noticeable Ones...notice me!"
Suzanne Vega - "Those Whole Girls...drip with news...spin intact...blaze and stun...and feel no lack"
It's always good to be honest with yourself. There's only so much time in the day, and you should spend it in the way that works best for you.
As a client, I look for the type of arrangement that you describe. It's much more rewarding to see a few friends more often than always meeting someone new. To me, YMMV is a risky concept.
I screen clients as well but not by the same criteria as the posters. Looks are not important to me but I like to feel some kind of connection. I choose to not have a revolving door so I am more selective in those I do see. I prefer chatting on the phone first with all new potential dates just so we have a base of communication before meeting.
I've also built up a steady regular clientele and find each date gets better as we learn more about one another. I know guys don't like to hear YMMV but when you can establish some kind of chemistry or common ground I feel it makes for a better time. - Lia
It's ladies like you that make this a worthwhile pursuit. I'm like you; I welcome the chance to chat with a lady before we meet. It's much easier for me when we meet, and I hope she feels the same.
Don't change a thing.
I really thought you were busy for the next two months. Doh! Silly me.
Some do not talk well on the phone... some are down on their luck and need a quick pick-me-up to make the difference... very intelligent and witty - but no looks.... or Donald Trump (ok so maybe not the best example...).
What to do... so you won't see me...?? It's the green thing isn't it! Bwaaaa!!! booo hooo....
Focus on true quality and you will do fine. I prefer not to see any provider that come packaged with a list of wills and will nots.
Better chemistry means better click...happier clients...happier YOU...consistant reviews...less burnout...better longevity working in this business...happier all the way around.
I don't necessarily limit the number of clients I see as a whole...I like variety too after all...but am low volume and like to like what I do. Seeing just anyone that will pay the fair takes it's toll in the long run...
Happy New Year!
xoMegan
Quantity - the number of "selected" clients. I love your policy. Would love to be qualified!!
Glad so many of you understand.... Very strict with screening, and absolutely adore the few men I am incredibly, personally intimate with!! Have especially deep relationships with two as of the moment.
Not into random meetings with men I know nothing about.... a connection/ special vibe, and a good one, is essential!
I can only wish that you were my atf. I would love that kind of exclusitivity and appreciation. Something that I don't get from my current atf. Alas, she is fantastic in bed and that keeps me chained to her for now....
...because it sounds to me as if you have moved 'under the radar'. There is NO reason for these clients to review you as you won't see others, thus no service to TER. There is no reason for you to advertise since you will turn down requests. I don't knock your choices...indeed I have had a few providers go under the radar after being 'out there' for awhile, and contact me to let me know that while they have disappeared, they would still like to see me. Bottom line: don't send mixed messages.
She has the right to do that, but I agree with you, she should rely on referrals from guys that she will see and stop advertising on public sites. If she is good then the private referral route will work for her.
I sense the poster from NYC is interested in a personal dating situation more than a business--having just a handful of clients with intimate relationships. Fine for her.
For me being an escort is a business, a way to save funds before I move on to my next career. I don't use it as a dating service because most of my clients are married and unavailable.
Although I'm not here to "date" anyone, I've met some amazing guys--men I never would have looked at twice on the street otherwise.
I personally think it's hard to get an accurate portrayal of someone from 1-2 emails and a picture.
If I had set down strict criteria on career, appearance, background and personality before meeting someone, I would have missed out on some fabulous guys over the past couple of years.
Most men don't write descriptive or expressive emails, and face it, most American men aren't Brad Pitt lookalikes. Most don't have Harvard MBA's but many have incredible IQ's or street smarts.
But you'll never know that about them unless you meet them first. If a gentleman is polite and has a provider reference, I wouldn't hesitate to see him. If we don't click at our meeting then I'll decline to see him again (and he probably wouldn't call me back anyway.)
For me, the chance to meet another amazing man vastly outweighs the risk he turns out to be a dud.