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homersimpson085 2 Reviews 380 reads
posted

My post was probably too complicated so here's the summary:

1) When you have to drive a long way for an appointment, do you leave before knowing the hotel name ?

2) What do you do when your mood is killed and it's clear no erection is going to happen. Massage, makeout session, sex lesson ( show me some tricks of the trade)?

-- Modified on 12/8/2010 10:45:51 PM

homersimpson0851929 reads

I had a misunderstanding about the time of an appointment. We booked for 3-5 PM, but since I live 2 hour drive away, I said I would leave my house ONLY when I get the hotel name. She did not send the hotel info. till 2PM, so I told her I would get there at 4PM. This freaked her out since she was under the assumption I would be there at 3PM.  So anyways long story short, we both apologized and she said she could only do 1 hour due to other commitments. She said she would make it up to me next time, which I believed.

But when she freaked out, that completely killed my mood since she thought I was going to do a no/show.  So it was really an awful session. I only had one erection that lasted 1 minute. Despite her best attempts it would not come back up. So zero pops.  Btw, I am in my early 30's :-) . So how do you make the best of a bad situation when your mood is killed? I guess this taught me two lessons:

1) Sex is really all in the brain no matter how horny the little head is
2) Triple confirm any assumptions about appointment times

-- Modified on 12/8/2010 9:03:20 PM

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cutehunkie396 reads

If the situation and chemistry is not there,  even if the lady is a "10" .. your mental state won't get you that prolonged erection you hoped for.   My ATF always gets me erections, but one time she was rushing and it killed the mood, so haven't been back to her and don't know if we will be back together in the near future.

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noavgjoe310 reads

My first session was in Vegas back in '00 and all I ordered was a BJ.  The girl was cute but I wasn't feeling it at all, zero chemistry.  I couldn't even maintain an erection.    We both gave up and I just took it as a loss.  

Cialis/Viagra/Levitra will keep you up and running whether there's chemistry or not.

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ming387273 reads

I've been in this hobby for about one year now and you are definitely right that it's all in the head. I remember my 1st few meetings, I would fuck for 20+ minutes and get about 3 pops within the 2hrs meetings I prefer. Lately, 2 times is like the max and the fuckings last only 10 minutes. The original excitement of meeting girls is long gone. I probably need to take a break to build up the excitement again or be even more selective on whom I'm seeing.

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homersimpson085381 reads

My post was probably too complicated so here's the summary:

1) When you have to drive a long way for an appointment, do you leave before knowing the hotel name ?

2) What do you do when your mood is killed and it's clear no erection is going to happen. Massage, makeout session, sex lesson ( show me some tricks of the trade)?

-- Modified on 12/8/2010 10:45:51 PM

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impposter314 reads

Knowing the hotel name, apartment building address and other info (short of the room or apartment number) still will not guarantee that you won't be NCNSed or otherwise inconvenienced. On two occasions (different cities, different people) I was in transit and talking to my hostess to confirm details and that I would be there in 15 minutes; 15 min later, I arrived and then there was 45 minutes of "no answer", no reply to voice mails, etc.. (Both had excuses, one bad, one good.)

Keep in mind that someone who doesn't know you well might give you a general location or address so you can find the place before the 2nd phone call. Sometimes they want to see you from their window across the street before deciding to let you in. In a large city with lots of hotels and landmarks, it's easy. "You're at the Marriot near the fountain? Great. Cross the street 'cause I'm in the Sheraton."

Cliff Notes version: Yes, I often leave for an appointment without all the info but I've only been flaked on a few times.

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ziggy440194 reads

NCNS fears: This has happened to me in a few different variations. I have left without hotel info and then gotten it. I have left with hotel info and had a NCNS. I started out fairly tense about location info, but I have learned to be more relaxed. It turns out that having the information earlier or later does not relate to the likelihood of an NCNS. Not getting the location info until the last minute will suggest that the lady is likely to run late, but it does not mean she will NCNS. You have to assume she is going to be there as agreed, and make sure you are there, too.

The other part of your question is probably more appropriate for the Erotic Highway Board, where the LG and her cohorts will suggest all sorts of interesting things. Or you can just ask the lady, if you are comfortable, not upset and find some attraction there. One thing to keep in mind is that she probably is a little upset, too, even without the other issues you had about being late. First off, your little head has taken over her session, and is taking it to a new and different place. Secondly, TER guys who do not get off are a big risk of a very bad review, so you may want to set her mind at ease about that if you plan to stay.

Then talk, maybe ask her for suggestions. Explore different parts of each others bodies, get out some toys, ask her questions if there is something you are curious about (and I know you are curious, Homer). Two things to keep in mind are that you can still do just about everything you can do with a woodie, except penetration, and that you may well discover something new that you love.

I did have a chaotic date similar to the one you describe, and I ended up being a regular. We liked hanging out together, playing and talking, and the next time the sex was wonderful. She may even be my ATF, tho it is still a little early to be sure. Go figure.

Zig

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cutehunkie153 reads

To answer your 2 questions.

1)  It's best if you know the hotel name, or don't go.  I normally don't drive too far, because driving through traffic can zap some of your energy.  So, better get the hotel name.  For a regular I already know, I also ask for the room number if I need to drive that far. Yes sir, the room number too.

2) When the mood is killed. There's really no guarantee.  For me, DFK + a nice HJ helps or a sloppy BBBJ. Or I can pleasure the lady with DATY and then 69.  It's good if you are in a relaxed position to lessen the stress and tension.   Ladies with great skills should also try to be sweet and be patient with you - that way, you don't feel rushed.   I suspect you felt rushed because you know she has another client coming.

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mrfisher281 reads

the time and date of the meeting in every single correspondence:

Case in point:

I just had a session with someone that went from 2-4 PM.  Normally I see this person from 3-5 PM, but this time I pushed it up an hour for reasons having to do with getting someone to the airport.

I stressed this fact in each correspondence, yet the day before the meeting the gal emailed me asking if we could push the start from 4 to 3 PM!

Like I said, you have to keep repeating it.

These gals have lots of appointments and some are a bit chronologically challenged to start.

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RoseMallowe203 reads

That if she knew you were driving that long and that far to see her, she would make it as easy as possible for you. I'm in MN and "low volume", so I have a buffer zone of 30-60 minutes on each side of the appointed time. Because, being in MN, the travel time can be messed up from weather, traffic, and any number of other things. I take the time to get to know my clients a little, and some are like me, always 5-10 minutes late ;)
I may be wrong, as this is my 2 cents, but if you are going to travel that far to spend that much money, you are going to get treated pretty damn nice.
OP, I sure hope you have better luck next time, all the viagra in the world is not going to make up for the bad vibes.

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homersimpson085176 reads

We rescheduled this session last minute and she was frantic trying to get all the ducks in a row for me.  I should have sensed all this and made double careful the time was what we both understood.

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RoseMallowe166 reads

Aw don't beat yourself up, sh*t happens

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manypoppins319 reads

Viagra. It's cheap insurance against a wasted session. I'm in my early thirties as well, and although I never have erection problems outside of the hobby it's better to pop a pill than to blow several hundred bucks because of ED during the session.

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Radcow266 reads

I heard of a 30 year old that took two 10 mg tabs thinking he'd get more bang for the buck and almost died. ED drugs should only be used by prescription and even then there are certain risk and frankly some people react very differently to them.

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manypoppins224 reads

I got mine from India and they work great (I only take 25mg), but I would of course recommend seeing a doctor and getting the real stuff.

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johngaltnh279 reads

And nothing kills it more easily than knowing that your prospective sex partner thinks the worst of you.

The payment aspect makes no difference in the fundamental human aspect that you really don't want to have sex with someone who thinks of you as a horrible person. And once the fact she thinks that becomes evident, for most men, sex just isn't gonna happen. It wouldn't even happen if SHE paid YOU!

There is, for some people, an association between sex and violence such that they can have sex and derive gratification from sex with someone they know despises them. But this is a distinct minority.

Basically, your body was speaking for your subconscious: don't have sex with a woman who thinks you are bad. Remember, effective and cheap birth control has not been around that long. So this reaction keeps you from procreating with women who are a bad match.

This is not just a matter of triple-confirming assumptions about appointment times. It is also a matter that in this arena we all fall far too easily into the worst possible assumptions about the character and intentions of the other people involved; and this tends to perpetuate a cycle of distrust and dissatisfaction.


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homersimpson085200 reads

You are right , she thought the worse of me while I was driving frantically to get there during the 1 hour radio silence. And then during the session I thought the worse of her for thinking the worse of me :-( . You are right, things like this can easily lead to cycles of mistrust. I want to see her again when I am ready and I am sure we will have some good make up sex :-)

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mistressjessica214 reads

Developing some relationship with your lady friend.. Good communication and good reviews.. Sometimes S### happens and I can see both sides of the story.. Another reason why I love my cozy little apartment and  My repeat friends.... Good luck....

Posted By: homersimpson085
I had a misunderstanding about the time of an appointment. We booked for 3-5 PM, but since I live 2 hour drive away, I said I would leave my house ONLY when I get the hotel name. She did not send the hotel info. till 2PM, so I told her I would get there at 4PM. This freaked her out since she was under the assumption I would be there at 3PM.  So anyways long story short, we both apologized and she said she could only do 1 hour due to other commitments. She said she would make it up to me next time, which I believed.

But when she freaked out, that completely killed my mood since she thought I was going to do a no/show.  So it was really an awful session. I only had one erection that lasted 1 minute. Despite her best attempts it would not come back up. So zero pops.  Btw, I am in my early 30's :-) . So how do you make the best of a bad situation when your mood is killed? I guess this taught me two lessons:

1) Sex is really all in the brain no matter how horny the little head is
2) Triple confirm any assumptions about appointment times

-- Modified on 12/8/2010 9:03:20 PM

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rkl165 reads

I come from an underserviced area and I've made several long drives under the "duress" of the uncertainty of location and/or other details.  It depends on the specific situation, but I tend to bring along a lot of info on backups in the area, preferably reliable, non-time dependent (like walk-in AMPs), even if they are a step-down in quality from my main target.  I don't know what your circumstances are and how much flexibility they allow, but just knowing I have alternatives reduces my stress considerably and when I do arrive I have a nicer session.

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shudaknownbetter177 reads

I often have to leave before knowing the hotel.  I request a nearby address I can use GPS for.  I've missed a planned meeting because of a sudden weather event closing the interstate...  I had to call (stopped in the high speed lane)& reschedule.  So I make a point of arriving early, if possible I identify the hotel then remove myself so as not to attract attention...  to the corner coffee & time my return to the correct time.  I often call from the coffee parking, can see the hotel.
YES, you have to risk the drive.  SHE's risking the cost of the room.  I have yet to be NCNS but I know it can happen.
skb

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homersimpson085186 reads

I think you are right, if she is risking the room, I should risk the drive. I forgot to mention in my original post that I was the only one for her that day. I think if a provider is touring and already has the hotel, then one should wait till getting specifics before leaving home.

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