Given all of the recent drama on this board I thought I would impart something that happened to me recently in the hopes of lightening things up.

Recently I met with a reputable provider at her in-call location. She had good reviews and was very attractive so I was very happy to get an appointment with her. We started with the usual small talk but for some reason our interaction seemed to be somewhat awkward. Many people on this board talk about YMMV and ‘clicking’ with the provider. I am not bad looking and keep my self in shape and was also freshly showered but for some reason we either were both having a bad day or maybe I reminded her of an ex-boyfriend, I don’t know. And it certainly wasn’t because she thought I might be LE as I had passed her reference checks easily. Also I have been with about 10 different providers and read a lot of the postings on this and the newbie board so I knew pretty much how to act and was not dealing with that first-time nervousness.

We started with some light kissing and touching as we disrobed and she was certainly doing what she needed to get me going but the interaction still seemed to be at a very mechanical level. She started with a decent BBBJ but with little eye contact or vocal interaction. It just seemed like one of those awkward social moments so I was racking my brains to say SOMETHING to help break the quiet uneasiness that seemed to pervade this session.

You know how it is when you say something and immediately wish you could take it back? Here we were with her lips on my dick and her head bobbing up and down so I said the first thing that came to my mind, “Boy, you are one hell of a cocksucker!”. As soon as I said it I wished I had not and for a split second she just froze. I certainly didn’t mean it in a demeaning way but maybe I just touched a nerve. The word certainly has a pejorative meaning and is used primarily as an insult whereas I was trying to compliment her on her obvious skills. I don’t know what nerve I hit or feeling I caused to surface. Maybe I reminded her of the pay-for-sex relationship or that she was only doing this because of the money or maybe the insult meaning of the word got to her. For some reason it felt like the silence between us got even deeper it that is even possible. I thought about apologizing but felt keeping my mouth shut was the best policy at this point. She kept on going for about 30 more seconds then put on the condom, and quickly rode me to completion. After that she got up, dressed, and told me she wasn’t feeling well and that the session was over. I didn’t want to argue or do anything else as she was obviously a little upset so I also dressed and then just left after leaving the full donation for her.

I felt badly about this on the way home. I realize that providers are human and the services they provide are on a very intimate level. She delivered the goods as promised but it was obvious that her heart was not in it. We all know that there are times where the chemistry is just not there and rather belabor the point it is best to move on. While she was well reviewed I felt it better to not do so and just let it be.

All I can say in my defense is I MEANT IT AS A COMPLIMENT!

Captain Oblivious you're an articulate writer: do you have any provider reviews?

You make an excellent point. I have had occaisons where the provider is a 9 but her personality is a 3. It makes the experience very uncomfortable. I think you did the right thing by just letting it go. I find that if the provider is a 6 or 7 but her personality is a 9 or 10 then this would be the provider who I would see again.

connection/ chemistry is impossible to screen for, though it certainly helps eliminate those with whom one has nothing in common!

Yours is a typical example of YMMV -- esp as you didn't have a connection from the get-go.  Should post a review, in any case.  With your comment, I would have responded rather favorably, with a big 'Thank you!!'. Mmmmmm.....

We're not the ones you called a cocksucker

look up to your face, smile, run my lascivious tongue around your head and say "mmmmm I'm a bad girl huh?" and then go all the way down on you making you gasp with pleasure

that's the difference between a girl who does for me money and don't give a shit about a client (like her)

and

a girl who actually loves her work, enjoys to suck dick and be called a cocksucker is definitely a compliment

next time, book a girl like me lol, you are PAYING her, she is not doing you ANY FAVORS, so stop this apology shit. Nothing wrong with you, but with her baby.

And you should've adjust the donation as well, according to her performance.

-- Modified on 9/23/2005 5:02:44 AM

I'm fat and I fuck every chance I get, but I don't want a lady calling me a fat-fucker.

I hope you would allow me to properly peruse your BackDoor-Girl why you are lasciviously tonguing my head

 IA

Unfortunately, it also happened to me with one of my girl-friends.  Former girl friends.  In my defense, I will say I had been awake for more than 60 hours when I did it.  It didn't matter to her.  

But in "dirty talk," I've said some things that have brough trysters up short.  Even a couple of experienced ladies with kinky PSE reputations.  It never threw that much ice on things.  But it did break the dance rhythm.  I've since learned to try to clear the "rules" of the game first.    

However, with the right lady, when it works, it sometimes goes right to her clit, which is where I'm aiming.  

It would have been a compliment for me. I love to be talked to dirty while in the act. Had you called me what you called her, I would have loved it and gave you the sloppiest, wettest bj you ever experienced. For me the words are a motivator if anything. You have nothing to apologize for. Is she not a cock sucker? I am so call me one.

GS - thanks for the compliment, yes I do have reviews, about 8 or so but am obviously (Obliviously...) using an alias here.

CO

the silently building dirty talk rushes from your mouth:
"I want to lick your cockroach"  or something equally nasty and over-the-top.

And suddenly you realize that one person was having a nasty PSE and the other was having a sweet GFE.

That's what might have happened with you.  She probably should've shifted gears and purred something nasty back...
Or maybe she's one of those people who can't hear with their mouth full and thought you said:
"Boy, you are one Jell-O and Sock lover!"


-- Modified on 9/23/2005 1:10:58 PM

My brain's as flooded out as my cock.  How can I write anything intelligent now!  

(One wishing-you-were-here solo act later.  Mmmmmmmm!)

Yes, dirty talk should rev you up rather than humiliate you.  When your hormones are high, a word like "cocksucker" is like erotic music.  When there's little or no desire it becomes an insult.  

Unlike the Captian, Tig, I wasn't writing about that word per se.   I was writing about any compliments or dirty phrases that just don't do the trick-- or worse, they freeze up things completely.  A really snappy malapprop at the wrong time can unravel a whole relationship.

I've found with nasty talk, it's better not to start with anything too imaginative.  Without practice, anyway. Guys usually aren't too articulate during a BJ, and its a bad time to start "First Draft Theatre."  Just stick with percussive words like "cocksucker" and you're usually okay.  Usually.    

You do sound like such a total package, Tig.      

-- Modified on 9/24/2005 4:22:45 PM

My atf considers herself the best cocksucker in the world and takes great pains to do me in such a way that I can only regard her as the best bj that I have ever had.  She would love to hear what you said!  So far, I have been heavily critisizing her performance and she is responding with 20 minute bjs with every bell and whistle she can think of.  Funny situation, but why worry about such a silly thing.  I can't think of cold water ever descending in the middle of a bj....everthing is so fantastic in that moment.  I don't even have the capacity to speak in any case when its going good.