it comes down to this question. His lack of savoir-faire, and your adherence, probably would have never been apparent behind closed doors. But the minute a meeting like this becomes public, it's a DATE, and it's acceptable to bail for any number of reasons, including mood, which would play a factor in the subsequent business-transaction-related activities. "It is much easier for a civilized person to act as a barbarian than for a barbarian to act as a civilized person." - Mr. Spock. The Moral of the Story? Before going out on a DATE, make sure your date can be as civilized as you!
Boy and Girl leaves bar area making their way into dinning room. Fancy dinning room.
Boy brings along his beer. Bottle in hand.
Boy and Girl arrives at table. White linen table cloth. Fancy.
Couple sits.
Boy and Girl scans menu. Boy places beer bottle towards mouth, swigs loudly than place bottle back onto table.
Repeats.
Girl cringes inward.
Server arrives. Girl orders Sancerre and meal. Boy, lips to bottle, swigs beer. Orders entree
Girl frowns inward- Wishes he'd requested a glass, So boy would stop swigging.
Server arrives with bread and beverage. Girl requests a tumbler for the boy. Boy declines - server walks away. Boy swigs beer - lips to bottle bottle emptied.
Girl is relieved.
Boy places empty bottle onto floor of fancy restaurant. Girl is completly embarrassed and "gently" motions for boy to pick up empty bottle from floor. There's room on the table.
Boy declines. Girl re-requests. Boy declines. Girl makes a strong request. Boy obliges. Girl places empty beer bottle onto her side of the fancy dinning table.
Server arrives. Girl gives server bottle. Girl is embarrassed. Couples mood change.
Girl excuses herself to the WC. Looks in mirror. Decides that the evening has went on long enough. Leaves WC.
Girl privately speaks to hostess and sever. Girl places a halt on their order. Proceeds to Boy.
Girl informs Boy that evening must now end. Girl returns envelope.
Boy and Girl leaves bar area making their way into dinning room. Fancy dinning room.
Boy brings along his beer. Bottle in hand.
Boy and Girl arrives at table. White linen table cloth. Fancy.
Couple sits.
Boy and Girl scans menu. Boy places beer bottle towards mouth, swigs loudly than place bottle back onto table.
Repeats.
Girl cringes inward.
Server arrives. Girl orders Sancerre and meal. Boy, lips to bottle, swigs beer. Orders entree
Girl frowns inward- Wishes he'd requested a glass, So boy would stop swigging.
Server arrives with bread and beverage. Girl requests a tumbler for the boy. Boy declines - server walks away. Boy swigs beer - lips to bottle bottle emptied.
Girl is relieved.
Boy places empty bottle onto floor of fancy restaurant. Girl is completly embarrassed and "gently" motions for boy to pick up empty bottle from floor. There's room on the table.
Boy declines. Girl re-requests. Boy declines. Girl makes a strong request. Boy obliges. Girl places empty beer bottle onto her side of the fancy dinning table.
Server arrives. Girl gives server bottle. Girl is embarrassed. Couples mood change.
Girl excuses herself to the WC. Looks in mirror. Decides that the evening has went on long enough. Leaves WC.
Girl privately speaks to hostess and sever. Girl places a halt on their order. Proceeds to Boy.
Girl informs Boy that evening must now end. Girl returns envelope.
...that while I would never do what your date did, I think you went off the rails here. I suppose you've got to be true to yourself...BUT. No matter what the setting and no matter what your expectations were, you seem to have forgotten that you were involved in a transaction. I agree the guy seems to have no clue about how to behave in a fancy restaurant. But, once you tried to point out what he was doing violated Miss Manners, you should have dropped it, enjoyed your meal and not turned the occasion into a forum to teach him Couth Behavior 101. PS: I love Sancerre and would be happy to share a bottle with you some time. I promise not to siwg it from the bottle or use a straw.
What if the tables were turned and the girl entered the restaurant - loudly chewing gum and blowing bubbles. Are you saying that the boy can not cancel the date because of the business transaction?
With any business agreements there are grey areas. One grey area is comfort. No one can gage for someone else what is comfortable for the other. I guess in this case the girl was uncomfortable and turned off by the guys etiquette.
Just because you are paying a dentist to extract your tooth does not mean it is ok for him to use faulty tools. Perhaps a bit of an extreme example but I hope you get the gist of my thought process....(smile).
I would most likely be trying to find a way out as well.
What part of discretion do some people not understand? If you can't fit in to your surroundings then you most likely are standing out and that's not discrete in the slightest.
Not that my dates and I don't stand out sometimes but that's normally do to us having entirely to much fun........not because we're clueless.
something does not feel right to them. Understand, I did not say you could not cancel, simply that I thought it was a bad idea to continue pushing your standards of etiquette (with which I actually agree) to the point where the atmosphere was poisoned for you. And I am sure you can find a better analogy than the dentist and his tools. PS: I'm still open to that bottle of Sancerre.
... when I was being paid, I did indeed put up with behavior on the girl's part that, on a civie date, I would not have willingly endured.
Now, these were extremely well-mannered women in terms of table manners and their behavioral flaws were more along the lines of being snooty little miss rich bitches who desperately needed a spanking. But I eventually tamed the shrews on daddy's dime.
Certainly, I would not have put up with behavior that was a safety issue or the like; and we all have our limits -- but no, I wouldn't have walked out on a girl for the way she drank her beer.
1. You have the right to cancel any date, any time, for any reason, and the fact that you gave back the whole donation proves that you have class.
2. You are a fool. Seriously? He drank beer out of a bottle? In a fancy restaurant? Whose fantasies were being catered to here, yours or his? You can generally cut the pomposity and pretentiousness in places like that with a butter knife, and apparently he was a guy who didn't give a shit about it. you gave up what I assume is thousands of dollars because a guy drank a beer out of the bottle. I know, I know, in a "fancy" restaurant, where the people are too good to drink out of the bottle. Good for you, I guess.
Would you have left if he ordered red wine with fish, used his dinner knife to eat his salad, or failed to spread his napkin on his knee?
1. You don't have to explain anything. You asked for opinions, I gave mine.
2. You didn't say, in your long story, that the single "bone" was leaving the bottle on the floor, you gave a long history leading up to it, and in fact state that ultimately he agreed to pick up the bottle. I stand by my first opinion.
I suspect the real issue here was not manners, but control. The girl signalled (she thought clearly) that she did not think his behavior was appropriate. He signalled to her that he was choosing to ignore her opinion/discomfort. Depending on other vibes, this could cause a lady some concern about what might occur behind closed doors, although that seems a bit paranoid to me, but, hey, it's her call.
The beer bottle" sin" itself seems really trivial, and if that's all it was, I have to agree with those prior posters who point out that a real GF might have a right to be that bitchy, but not a paid companion.
Posted By: KaseyDaniels
Clarence:
The bone of contention was his persistence on leaving the bottle on the floor. This persistence led to her choosing to end the date.
Pomposity and etiquette aside if a date behaves in a boorish manner and disregards the wishes of their date than I'd have to say girl has a point. If boy is so determined to have his own way and refuses to act like a gentleman in public what may boy be like in private if girl asks boy not to do something. Just because boy has the spare change to buy girls time doesn't mean boy has right to behave like a boy.
It's hard to tell, but from the story, it seems as though the deal-breaker for her wasn't his uncouth manner, but rather his resistance to her wishes of getting him a tumbler and then passing him the bottle after he put it on the floor.
People can debate the minutiea every which way, but it seems reasonable clear that by that particular point it was obvious to both that she wanted him to adjust his behavior and he know it, and furthermore he had no intention of making any changes.
It doesn't matter who one thinks was in the right or what could have been done differently up to that point, it's apparant that this brand new (business) relationship was broken. Likely irrepairably, based on the stubbornness of both the jackass and the jackess.
Gotta give her cred for refunding the entire fee. I think she SHOULD have, but I'm always amazed at how often some of the ladies feel that they should keep all compensation once it is in their possession, no matter what.
he is rebelling, let us say it is pomposity, he should have done it by himself. He has no right to embarass another person whatsover, that is called etiquette and proper social behavior. Next thing you are going to say he paid for the providers time and that is beyond any pomposity and it is arrogance and lack of respect.
Dis he tell the provider that his fantasy si embarass her in a fancy restaurant? If he did and the provider agreed, then the fantasy part comes in, if not he is just a jerk who don't have manners.
Is that not the same thing as asking a lady who is "involved in a transaction" to just go along with whever the bad behavior is? where is the line drawn? Just because it is a transaction.. What I hear you saying is. Since she agreed it is ok for the gentleman to do ANYTHING HE WANTS? I can list examples if needed? She gave his money back.... even after taking the time to show up and put up with at least 30 min if not more of his bad manners. while she was mortified of his behavior.. I will even go so far as to say. If he had scheduled a date with her and had stated that it was his fantasy to do XYZ and she agreed that is another story.................
Posted By: inicky46
...that while I would never do what your date did, I think you went off the rails here. I suppose you've got to be true to yourself...BUT. No matter what the setting and no matter what your expectations were, you seem to have forgotten that you were involved in a transaction. I agree the guy seems to have no clue about how to behave in a fancy restaurant. But, once you tried to point out what he was doing violated Miss Manners, you should have dropped it, enjoyed your meal and not turned the occasion into a forum to teach him Couth Behavior 101. PS: I love Sancerre and would be happy to share a bottle with you some time. I promise not to siwg it from the bottle or use a straw.
and thoughts in my head I did not have. Where did I say anything approaching the idea that she must "just go along with whatever the bad behavior is?" Or that a man can "do ANYTHING HE WANTS?" Didn't say it. Didn't think it. You really need to go back re read my post more carefully. In case you choose not to, here's what I said: I disagreed with her trying to instruct him about how to drink his beer to the point where the atmosphere was ruined for her. I suggested that, after her first request, she just try to enjoy the rest of the evening with someone for whom she said she'd developed some chemistry. That's all.
We all put our pants on, some of us do it one leg at a time, others not. There is no reflection on you which way someone else does things. Unless you choose to take what others do in as your own "stuff"....
I went on an extended trip with a client last winter, and had to learn this concept first hand, every day. It wasn't the easiest thing to do. But, I was working, it wasn't a civie date, it was a gig.
Plain and simple. We are hired companions, and our clients come from all walks of life. Unless you have a prerequisite for proper dinner etiquette listed or discussed beforehand, I would have to say that you left him high and dry...(unless he spilled his beer on himself, in which case he'd be high and wet!)
Thanks for your reply Alantra, but - I have to disagree with you on several points.
I value my time just as the other person. In this case we are not talking about me. I am only sharing an experience shared with me.
I think perhaps you're forgetting that the Gentleman has the right to cancel should he feel for whatever reason that he is not comfortable with the situation. So you are saying - as a fellow sister, Companion - that you would forgo your comfort - what ever that might be?
This is not a specific case of etiquette - that's just whats on the surface. What I think is the meat and potato of this post is a basis of choice.
There was a recent post from a Companion who did not open the door to a client based on what he wore. It was her choice just as it was his choice to don whatever attire he wore.
Just as it was the Boys choice to enjoy his beverage the way he did and the Girls choice to cancel. She lost a lot of money too- which to was her choice.
And, BTW, this doesn't mean any bad behavior is tolerable. If a client is nasty, scary, smelly or behaves in public in way that could cause undue attention, that is a very different story. None of this seemed to be true in this case. The guy simply had no idea about proper table manners. PS: You, too, are invited to share a bottle of Sancerre (or your wine of choice). As for that, Kasey has very good taste.
To see if girl is worth the pretentiousness she just exhibited.
Drinking beer from a bottle is not necessarily neanderthal behavior. If you said he was belching and then proceeded to play spin the bottle with the empty container, the reaction might be warranted, but the primary 'crime' here seems to be drinking from a bottle, placing it on the floor and ignoring your request for behavior modification. Unless he was a major ass and this was just the tip of the iceberg, it would seem that based upon the fact pattern presented it was a bit of an overreaction.
With that said, I totally respect a girl's right to comfort and anybody can walk out on anybody for any reason. But if you do it enough times for what appear to be fairly minor offenses, word gets around and business suffers.
Was this a first date? For me, multi-hour events come after we are fairly comfortable with each other, but if "attraction was confirmed" at this date, it might have been the first time they met so I would give a bit more leeway in my opinion.
This is not about me and I am not seeking any sort of recognition; hence me not linking my contact information.
MT91151:
Yes, perhaps the Girl did overreact but as you stated isn't it also about attraction. She seemed to be initially attracted to him but it went pear shape only AFTER he put the bottle on the restaurant floor. I don't know what her exact thought process was / is but the situation was enough for her to end the date AND lose money.
I too wish she had her website and review to see if she's worth the interesting poetic thread she just posted.
Most ladies link their website, so WTF? At least she's not blatantly using this thread as an advertisement. Now I'm getting kinda curious about this girl lol
I'm a drunk too but would never engage in such rude act.
MP67 might, but I won't. lmfao
Prolly would have ordered wine in a setting like that, instead of burping over a beer.
I do not aspire to have men pay me to take me out to fancy dinners and stuff, so what I would do is pretty irrelevant.
Instead, let's look at you.
Though no provider fits in one category completely for every appointment, I believe that, in general, providers can be divided into two broad categories.
Category 1: Providers who are predominantly actresses. Their feelings about their clients can range anywhere from neutral to outright revulsion. They consider themselves as essentially being paid to give the man something he couldn't otherwise obtain except through payment.
How many times have I seen such providers post these sorts of attitudes about at least a large proportion of their clients? Whether these attitudes have a basis in reality or not, they tend to grow to encompass all clients under all circumstances.
A provider in Category I, subject to screening an exercising a few basic preferences to make her occupation possible, is otherwise pretty much taking whoever has the money for her services.
If you are a Category I provider, you should NOT have cut the evening short. You should have taken the money, put on your very best award-winning acting performance, and shown this guy a good time rather than subjecting him to the mortal embarrassment of being a guy *who couldn't even be laid for money*.
Category 2: Providers who predominantly select clients in whom they see human merit. Though they may not "love" their clients in a classic sense, they are able to find something in their clients that is lovable and sufficiently meritorious that they don't need to act in order to have sex with them.
A provider in Category 2 does all manner of things, in her website, her screening and her selection of clients to assure a compatible match. She wants to spend her time with men she respects and who respect her in turn. Even if her clients are not her dream men, her behavior toward them is actually genuine, as is their behavior toward her.
A meeting between a client and a Category 2 provider is enough like a real date in many respects that some of the hazards of a real date should be considered to be present.
If you are a Category 2 provider, *so long as the envelope is returned*, you were entirely within your rights to terminate a date if it isn't going to work for you -- if you find that you would be constrained to act in order to pull it off and the results would be sub-par.
IF it were me -- and it would never be -- I would have mentioned to the client right off the top, and quite explicitly, that I found drinking straight from bottles to be uncouth behavior and that his continuing to do so would be incompatible with our having an evening together. Having once put him on warning so the evening (and envelope) had a chance to be salvaged, if he continued the behavior I'd have no compunction about handing him back the envelope and leaving. But hopefully he'd understand and everything would go swimmingly and I'd use my charm to rescue the evening and turn him into a repeat client. But then again, this is a fantasy hypothetical and if frogs had wings they wouldn't bump their asses. (*grin*)
Obviously, as I stated earlier, most providers don't fit entirely for all appointments into one category or the other; and there are likewise other providing categories I haven't mentioned. But most providers will fit predominantly into one of these categories. If you are a Category I provider, you really shouldn't have embarrassed your date into the dirt over what is, in the grand scheme of things, a very minor thing. It wasn't a safety issue. If you are a Category 2 provider, I would have liked to have seen you address the matter more explicitly and in more clear terms early on; but can't fault you for leaving under any circumstances so long as the envelope was left behind.
A man hands you an envelope containing hundreds or even thousands of dollars for an evening, at a time when the average man takes home only $500-$600 after taxes for an entire week of work. So what he handed you represented REAL money, even if he is wealthy.
Then, he prepares to treat you to the very finest in sophisticated dining.
He has passed your initial screening and as far as you know, presents no risk whatsoever.
And you WALK OUT ON HIM because you don't like the way he DRINKS HIS BEER?
Oh my goodness. If that had been me, I would have been royally pissed.
Yes, as a woman you have a right to choose not to sleep with anyone on whatever criteria. But as a professional that move was as smooth as sandpaper.
In case you haven't realized it, in exchange for simple sex and ACCEPTANCE you are being paid more than most brain surgeons mainly for being kind, considerate and thoughtful. For the work involved, and for the actually training and skill required, you are being paid damned well and you have had an epic fail.
You clearly suffer from two personality traits that would make any encounter between us end quickly.
First, you are too pretentious. I hate pretentiousness. Hey -- some guys thrive on it and that's cool but it's not my bag. Second, you have no sense of humor. A girl has to have a sense of humor to hang around with me or she'd lose her mind.
Just returning the envelope doesn't mean no harm was done. In my case, it wasn't unusual for me to have adjunct expenses required just to enable a date that ran into the thousands. Usually, the girl's fee was the smallest expense. Then there is the value of MY time, the time that *I* spent getting ready, several hours in transit etc.
So in case I was too subtle earlier, while I respect your right to terminate an engagement at any time for any reason; if you were to terminate an engagement on the basis of the way I drank a beverage ... I would be sufficiently pissed as to hire your most hated competitor for future engagements and to warn other guys not not see you.
In this case we're both lucky because I don't hobby these days.
Case in point was not based on the Boys beer drinking, it was based on her comfort level. Why must it be pretentious? If the tables were turned and your companion lacked something that was deemed important to you - no matter how trivial (that's subjective) you would continue with the date?
For the girl, her threshold seem to have been him placing the beer bottle on the floor. Trivial, perhaps but it was her choice based on her comfort level.
Well, I have in fact been a companion for hire, and with the tables turned I gave a very broad grant of tolerance and forbearance.
Now, your taxpayer dollars went to the tune of $50k+ to teach me all of the finer points of table manners, order of introductions, social ranking, ballroom dancing, receiving line etiquette and more so that I could be the utmost in gracious behavior when called upon. I even took a specific course on the proper table manners for consumption of various poultry. No kidding.
So I guess I could be really turned off by the slightest faux pas on the part of a date, especially when I am the guy doing the paying. I can quote you chapter and verse on what is considered "proper" etiquette on just about anything.
But the thing you are missing is that what you saw as practically offensive was for him perfectly normal. He might have been JUST as offended by something you were doing and seemed perfectly normal for you.
And another thing -- sometimes people go a bit out of their way to seem "normal" to make others around them more comfortable. I am not saying this to brag, but as an example. I have two dual major undergrad degrees, a masters, a PhD and a stack of further certs, etc. All in different and vary diverse fields. So I am WAY more educated than 99.9% of the population. But if you were to ever encounter me, you'd find that I don't speak like an academic. If anything, I am more "down home" in my speaking. I do that to put people at ease because I don't want people feeling excluded.
There are a lot of things about me that people can find intimidating, not just my education. What they are doesn't matter. The point is that I don't want someone, especially someone who is in sex work, feeling AT ALL intimidated by me because when I am naked I am just like any other man. I want you to be comfortable and at ease.
MAYBE a guy who just handed over a fat envelope (indicating he is well-off) and purchased a cream-of-the-crop beverage for the girl decided to order a beer in a bottle and placed it on the floor as a way of saying "Hey, I might have arrived here in a car that cost more than your parents' house, but I'm just an ordinary guy and please don't be intimidated."
Beer is the quintessential "ordinary guy" beverage. Putting the bottle on the floor is a way of getting it out of the line of sight when finished and is, in some circles, the exact way it is supposed to be handled.
This guy was likely trying to just make you comfortable, just like I am doing when I make fun of myself using folksy Southern colloquialisms.
We will NOT disagree on your comfort level. Obviously, his effort went awry. But I think this should have been looked at differently.
In all your posts to her you say "you." Kasey said it wasn't about her. You should say "the provider in question," "the girl,""her" , etc. I am surprised you didn't catch that with all your proper etiquette, and excellent writing skills.
I enjoy your posts. Though very long winded, they are always well thought out, and filled with reason, logic, knowledge, and/or facts and expereince, unlike so many other posts on this boards. Just wanted to point out your little error n this one.
I never said I believe her either, and I never replied to any of her posts in this thread directly. I notice pretty much everyone who did reply to her post treated it as if she was talking about herself. (We all know when stories start "I have a friend"...) I was just calling out John for fun, because he is always so proper in his posts, that this part almost seemed out of character. aloha
I cannot assume a fact not in evidence and must therefore state that my above post refers to the provider in question, who may or not be the provider who posted.
Sane can be disputed, But putting the bottle on the floor? For one, probably wouldn't notice cuz I'd be more into the company than any picadilloes that you might partake in.
Just me , I guess. Just not that picky, lol!
I mean, the whole thing really went over my head. I like to think I'm easy to have fun with. Don't expect cartwheels. Dressing to the nine's? Just relax and let's have a good time.
Not you, you handsome SOB! The ladies!... lol!
WTF is wrong with that?
I don't know, dude. I just wanna kick back and have fun. Civvie shit is just that. Work, wtf.
I'm with you John, Her behavior just seems absurd given the amount of money she was being paid. But you know more and more there seems to be a trend amongst many providers that just ignores the value of money and how little they actually have to do to get large chunks. I don't know who's at fault the most, the girls for playing their game and getting by with it, or the guys for being so naive and pussy whipped.
When I hobbied, I didn't worry much about cost, but every woman I saw without exception treated me with kindness and basic human respect and usually much more.
Any behavior that is accepted -- including what could be called "base and spoiled entitled female syndrome" -- is encouraged.
So the guys are to be faulted for accepting the behavior.
HOWEVER -- I am sick and tired of guys being blamed for the ridiculous behavior of women. Women are CHOOSING to act that way in the first place, and are therefore the primarily culpable party. Thank goodness there are ladies out there with great sense and ethics!
Until I got to the envelope, I thought we were talking about a real civilian date. But even on a civilian date, you WAY overracted. Really, all the guy did was swig beer from a bottle at your table and place the empty bottle on a floor...oh, the crime of the century. So he didn't have appropriate ettiquette fitting an upscale restaraunt. But let's look at what he didn't do. He didn't physically harm you. He didn't verbally abuse you, the wait staff or any fellow patron. He didn't show up wearing a "fuck the world" T-shirt, torn jean shorts, a backwards baseball cap and flip flops He didn't fling food across the restaraunt. He didn't make a racist or other reprehensible statement. He didn't tell you you were physically undeseriable. All of the above may have been reasons to end a date early. Taking swigs from a beer bottle and placing a bottle on the floor may not show great manners, but really its NOT a reason to end a date early. We have all been on bad dates where obviously there was not going to be a second one. MOST of us would have simply gotten through the meal, made some lame excuse not to continue the evening , and just gone home.
Now, the fact that this was a PAID date, really makes your action wrong. You think anyone would have ended a business meeting early (because that is what we are talking about here) because the client drank beer from a bottle (and swigged loudly) and not a glass?? Of course not. Out of all the things that may cause a provider to end a date early (physical harm, verbal abuse, a client who wouldn't hand over the envelope, or wouldn't stop a harmful activity) drinking beer from a bottle should NOT be one of them. I am sure providers have put up with much worse actions than this and still continued the appointment.
However, I think after the Boy placed the empty bottle on the floor of the restaurant, this was the equivalent -at least for her- of bad behavior, akin to wearing that torn jeans backward cap and flip flop you described.
it comes down to this question. His lack of savoir-faire, and your adherence, probably would have never been apparent behind closed doors. But the minute a meeting like this becomes public, it's a DATE, and it's acceptable to bail for any number of reasons, including mood, which would play a factor in the subsequent business-transaction-related activities. "It is much easier for a civilized person to act as a barbarian than for a barbarian to act as a civilized person." - Mr. Spock. The Moral of the Story? Before going out on a DATE, make sure your date can be as civilized as you!
Actually , I think you should have honored your commitment. This wasn't a blind date , it was a verbal contractional arrangement. It's you profession. Does not sound like the guy was verbally abusive or you ever felt endangered. Sorry he wasn't Prince Charming or your cup of tea. But he did engage you for dinner companionship and I'm sure your dignity could have survived the meal. You do not imply there was any after dinner plans. If that is what you chose to pass on, well, I'll concede that to be a different matter. But if indeed you abruptly aborted a social appt....sorry...I think you were a little too reactive.
be thankful you have the loot to pick your clients and you could walk away. it may not always be that way. by doing what you did, you took a big step toward defining what you do and don't want in your life.
I think you must be pulling our collective legs here! You mean to tell me that simply drinking from a bottle is the worst faux pax you have experienced as a provider? Your post sounds like some Carrie Bradshaw wannabe complaining to her gal pals about the terrible date she had the night before. You should not have booked a dinner date with someone you had not met with before. A private first time meeting would have let you know whether this was someone you wanted to be seen with in public. I believe providers have every right to protect themselves and not to get into ANY situation that makes them uncomfortable. But I think you are SOL to come on here and look for support in your decision.
News Flash: You were NOT on a date with this "boy". He was PAYING you for your companionship. If this was the worst affront you've had in the business, you are very fortunate indeed. As any human being with the right of free will, you get to decide who you want to be with. But there must have been more factors contributing to your negative feelings than what you have described.
The reality is that a lot of "boys" could not get a date with the "girls" they book time with if they didn't pay them. For you "girls" to then climb on your high horses and dismiss this "boy" as lo-class and (not worth your time) is pure double-standard hubris! Your complaint is exactly the kind of BS that men have had to put up with from high maintenance civillian women and that drives us to this hobby in the first place.
I agree with previous posters who wish you had the nerve to reveal your identity so we could see your provider page and reviews. You had better be in the top 10 in the nation to feel so high and mighty about what you will and will not accept in the way of behavior from your clients.
I am not under an alias... and I will speak for her..
It was not the drinking out of the bottle that was the problem..
Let me spell it out for you in simple terms..
It was the loud animal noises.. all that was missing was the beer belch ,or as I call it Redneck slurping.... from the bottle It was the There is a place and a time to drink beer from a bottle and a glass was offerred and then.. what kind of CAVEMAN.. YES, I said it.. puts his beer bottle on the floor in ANY Resturant? much less a very nice one..
According to her. He had a least 3 opportunities to gather his manners and failed on all 3... yes, She is very fortunate. I am willing to bet she has been both very lucky and knows her boundries...
Hugs from Jessica I am sitting pretty on my high horse and I am not even close to being on the top 10 list.. Feel free to see my website, etc,e tc,,, I am not high maintenence I have class...........
I believe YOU need to reread her original post. There is NO mention of "loud animal noises"! This is the BS that I am talking about. You are making inferences based upon your own personal baggage. THAT is the very definiiton of High Maintenance
Excuse me RedReaver but let's take it down a notch. This post is not to anger anyone nor am I here to judge or to be be judged. I am only the poster and only contributing to a discussion board.
With that being said:
10 or -10 everyone has their level of comfort. Somethings work out sometimes, sometimes...not so much
Yes, he was paying for the Girls time. So does that means whatever occurs during that time should be tolerated even if it makes the other person uncomfortable? That is the basis, everything is is subjective
So because he has the funds to pay the Girl -she HAS to put up with whatever the Boy does? No matter how trivial it may seem to you and many others?
Next time you are at a restaurant - a very fancy restaurant (ex only: Daniels) - try placing your empty bottle of beer (or whatever) on the floor and take note to your dates behavior. Better yet let's turn the table around, what would you have done?
This is not class warfare (smile) - just an adult conversation.
If you read my entire post carefully, you would have noticed that i did allow that it is, of course, your right to decide what you will (and will not) abide. But having said that, my view is that your reaction was extremely 'high maintenance". Your post lays out a situation that, at most, was a relatively minor Miss Manners misstep.
You have every right to decide that such behavior is too uncouth for you to tolerate. But in posting the encounter asking for responses, you leave yourself open to those, including myself, to make judgment calls.
As for what I would have done? Well, I don't know if my imagination is powerful enough to create a fantasy where a woman would be willing to pay me for my time (lol). But I would like to think that if, say, someone bought a meal with me at a charity auction (might happen!) I would do my best to make them feel comfortable for that brief time, and be willing to overlook something of the nature you mention.
There was no mention in your post if this dinner was to be a prelude to other activities that evening. I presume it must have been and that is the key here. That you felt the signals this boy was giving off were indicative of a less than enjoyable encounter later.
You appear to be in the enviable position to be very exclusive in your clientele. More power to you. But when you post your high maintenance complaints on a DB you need to accept that not every one will support your self-superior attitude. You asked what we think, and i told you.
Fair is fair; I appreciate dearly your reply and accept with open mind any and all reasonable and non-disrepectfully replies.
However this gross misconception that it was a self- superior thing is way beyond false. If she berated him that's one thing, but she just graciously declined to go any further with the date.
I'm not even certain if the Boy knows why the date was terminated.
If you are really concerned with not being misconstrued as painfully self-superior, you ought to ditch the third person voice: "She graciously declined..." " She asked him politely.." Even novelists use the third person narrative sparingly because it creates an aloof and off-putting mood. Just sayin'
I don't think I could describe Kasey's "friend" any better using a hundred words. lol
as for "aloof and off-putting" it's not just the third person facade that creates that mood, virtually everything she has written has added to that impression of her.
The only argument I have with your post is that you stated "misconstrued", I think "properly construed" is a much more accurate observation.
Ok Daniel in NYC is one of the most formal restaurants out there. Coat required, many and most men in ties. This is your tier of restaurant you said you went to Assuming the guy was this big of a rube why did you bring him to such a formal restaurant in the first place? And Why would you bring a guy who you hadn't spent that much time with to a restaurant like that? Sounds like an akward way to kick off any first "date".
The gent was definitely lacking class and wasn't conducting himself in an appropriate manner. Just because you're paying for her time, doesn't mean you can go out in public and act like a trash ball.
Obviously you were embarrassed enough to make you uncomfortale. This works for both the guy and the lady. When out in public on a date, you should respect each other and not act in a way that would draw attention or make you look bad.
Me personally, I'm a social drinker and I don't really care to drink adult beverages when I'm on a date. Unless the lady insists we have a drink, I won't care if it's passed up. I want to be in top form when the pink kitty is served LOL.
Look pretty, enjoy my meal, laugh at his "boorish behavior", relax.
Of all of the embarrassing situations a girl can endure (*my most notable one being in a casino and having an old hag lean across a table to say 'what's a beautiful young girl like you doing with an old man like that' in front of a dozen people - LOUDLY drawing attention to the fact to our like, 50 year age difference*) I think that this is one of the least offensive I've ever heard of. So you had a dinner date with someone who isn't as mannerable as you would have liked. Maybe it was a very special occasion for him and you ruined it with your princess stunt.
As a person that likes going out to nice restaurants, it's not the end of the world he wanted to drink his beer out of the bottle. It's not less classy to of done so. I will give you putting the beer on the ground is odd no matter where you were at. I get the gut feeling he did it because of the bitchy vibe you put off. Are you the type of girl that thinks she's classy because you eat at nice restaurants?
Why didn't you just laugh and have a good time?
Now I have to know what restaurant you were at? Trust me any nice restaurant could give two shits he was drinking from a bottle. They need butts in the seats.
Who suggested the restaurant? It seems to me that he was out of place and you did nothing but make that more evident. In my experiences in life..this happens. either you can be flexible and go with the flow or you can let it go to your head. You were getting paid to entertain him...and I guess you thought you could not deal with a guy who drinks beer from a bottle. Hell I like it from a bottle too. I would have ordered a beer too...
She sounds like one of those prententious phonies who thinks they need to impress the fucking waiter.
Welcome to the 21st century. Restaurants, like esocorts are in the service industry. Customers are not supposed to adjust their behavior to suit the pseudo elite standards of those they pay. I would say the guy was better off keeping his envelope and spending it the next day on a provider more interested in pleasing her client instead of herself.
FWIW, although I enjoy a nice bottle of wine (or several), I will enjoy whatever the fuck I like, and if I want to drink the fucking wine out of the bottle, much less the beer, that's exactly what I am going to do.
All kidding aside, I enjoy fine dining and feel equally at home in a dive bar or a Michelin three star restaurant. I am secure enough in my SES to not feel the need to impress the wait staff when dining out. They are there to cater to and impress me, not the other way around. The same goes with escorts.
From my understanding, it was a mutual choice before hand. Exact location will not be shared but somewhere alongs the gastronomical equivalent of let's say Blue Hill, Jean Georges...
Both parties had ample time to review resturant via internet.
The Girl with tact and gentleness asked the Boy if he wanted a glass. However, by this time he was done with his drink. After Girl tactfully put up wit the loud swigs and such, he places the empty bottle of beer on the resturant floor.
Girl asked -with tact and a smile - if he could pass her the bottle from the floor as she has ample room on her side of the table (which only had a bread basket and water glasses). He said no that it was ok right there on the floor. She asked again put with a little more persistent...and with a smile.
Girl might have wanted to return to the restaurant at a later date and perhaps with another Boy- but may now be forever known as the Girl that was with the Boy who put the bottle on floor.
So not naming the restaurant because it would out this guy? But going into descriptive detail on what happened along with her using a (presumably) non alias handle (there is a evelope) is not outing the guy? Bullshit and bullshit.
Kasey seems to provide additional details as she deems necessary to bolster her case. Bullshit, either she is completely full of shit about the entire incident, or she was the "Princess in question"
If I wanted a fucking princesss for whom I had to meet some inflated "standard of conduct" I'd go trolling in the fucking Hamptons for some hoity toity, fucking spoiled rich bitch.
I too believe this actually happened, and I further believe that Kasey is the uptight princess we are talking about.
I also believe you nailed it in your earlier post the the guy was in a way goaded into some of his boorish behavior by her efforts to control his behavior. Acting like a nagging wife or mother is NOT sexy. it's the last thing I want in a date, paid or otherwise. I won't put up with civvie women trying to FIX me, I damn sure wouldn't put up with it from a paid date.
and yes, Kasey is REAL but IMO she's an uptight cunt that I would never want to spend any time with, but of course that's just my opinion, I could be wrong. lol
I'm with you and HH. She started this shit. She's hot. I'd fuck her in a heartbeat if it wasn't for the fact she'd get so turned off by MY habits and sense of decorum.
I'd be surprised if she didn't stand up and slap the shit out of me for me being me!
But I guess it's safe to say that there were one or two ladies I've seen that knew I'm just a big kid and actually had fun with my dumbass...!
I don't even want to type what i feel. You need to get over yourself. You picked the restaurant. I bet he could care less about it all because all he wanted to do was fuck you. The girl with tact and gentleness is full of shit. She is full of herself. And now all you worry about is wether the poor lil girl can ever set foot in the precious restaurant again. You will be known on here as the girl that was so full of herself I probably would have wanted to stick the beer bottle up your but instead the floor worked. Just listening to your words...I can imagine combined with the looks you gave and the words you spoke you must have looked a fool. And you still do now. You are right to call yourself a girl. You need to grow up.
You made me laugh at how ridiculous you are You made me cuss at your stupidity You are going to make this the longest thread of the week You exemplify everything I hate about women.
That was a Fairy Tale from hell!!! The Girl wouldn't kiss the frog and so the frog didn't get any kitty and the girl is left to looking in the mirror to wonder if she still is the fairest one of all. Hopefully she will realize she need to change her ways so she can have an all lived happily ever after ending.
I thought the same thing Carolina...who chose that restaurant and that setting? We don't know all the info so it's hard to make a judgment either way.
The one thing that bothers me a bit is him putting the bottle on the floor. I don't know ANYONE that would do that in a restaurant. I like beer too, but would I put the bottle on the floor when I'm done...no. And I don't think any of the posters here would do that either. When she asked him to put the bottle back on the table, I think a "normal" person would say something like, oops or oh ok and put it on the table. The fact he was so defiant makes me wonder what he would be like behind closed doors. We try to make each other comfortable on both ends so we can have a good time under the sheets! This guy was almost trying to push her buttons.
I'm not saying what she did was right or wrong because I wasn't there and who am I to judge really. I guess it's just a misunderstanding between two people.
I DO find that she had class by returning the envelope...I would have done the same if an evening wasn't going well enough to tough it out.
I'm not big on formality, and I hate being told how to behave. Any lady that's on this site will tell you that I have a gentlemanly streak, but don't push. I realize that you're the messenger, so when I say you, consider it the royal you. If you made a big deal about how I drank my beverage, there's an even chance that I'd comply with your wish or spill it on the table just to be an ass. I've been the guy that walked onto a plane wearing torn jeans, sweatshirt and leather jacket and headed straight to first class. The flight attendant, aghast that I might soil the seat for the paying folk, made a point to inform me that coach was the other way. I flung my leather jacket in his direction and ordered my drink. I'm also the person that makes a point of thanking every flight attendant on every flight for their service. My point is that sometimes it's just bad form to make hasty judgements of how others behave.
Now, backing up a step, what do we know about the girl? I've come to realize that many of the ladies that guys pay for sex fall into one of a few categories. There's the one that will give head in the back of a parked car for 25 bucks. Not pretentious in the least, but arguably there's a downside. There's the lady that expects to be paid well, entertained with box seats to the opera, 5 star hotels and only the finest restaurants. Not my thing, but whatever. IMHO, the provider "sweet spot" is the lady that looks like her pictures, performs like her reviews and seems to enjoy our time together. I'll see her again and again. Matter of fact, the lady that currently fits that bill doesn't drink her beer out of a glass either. I never thought that was what attracted me to her, but who knows, lol.
a joyless evening with such an uptight, humorless person. Let alone HAVE SEX with a lady who might find fault with the uncouth noises he'd make. *shudder*
That in a story like this, each reader is creating the scenario in theie mind and filling in lots of blanks with their imagination. That's what our minds do when we read a story. Add to that our natural filters and inherent perspectives that will affect what is created in our head and you come out with a bunch of very different movies playing in the screens of the audiences brains.
When I first read it, for what ever reason(s), I got the impression of a swaggering, slightly brutish guy, with a bit of a chip on his shoulder, making a bit of a "fuck you uppercrust assholes" sort of point with his behavior. Once mentioned by the lady, in the form of suggesting a glass, I imagined a bit of that attitude being directed straightly at her with the "fuck-you-you-stuck-up-#@$%*--watch-this!" gesture of putting the bottle on the floor. Perhaps a subtle implication there that once back in the room, he would "teach her a little lesson" by fucking her senseless.
That was a total fabrication of the nuances of the scenario. All from my head.
Even if others read her post and didn't come up with a richly featured character repleat with intense facial expressions, James Dean emotions, and a tortured soul that might explode at any moment, the infered all sorts of information simply because one must do so in creating the scenario in one's head.
In my first response, I wrote I couldn't tell what I would have done based on the information given. I didn't doubt the OP, but I know there are two sides to every story, and I know women see things very differently then men.
I don't defend her, but I don't criticize her either. Although I have to say, there are some well written and compelling replies telling her she should have responded differently.
WK-ing when defending her??? That's a strong possibility and maybe the case for some that do. But I don't think that dichotomic logic can be used on this one.
to go open a bottle of British style Michelin whoop-ass on the 'donkey' running that restaurant. A multi-Michelin star joint? Serving beer in the bottle? Where was this? In Texas somewhere?
If this was indeed a fine dining establishment, then the only thing Girl might do is contact the manager and discuss the bar's policy of serving bottles unpoured to see if that is normal there.
Despite the possibility of another backlash claiming I'm a woman, I'm still going to give my opinion that Boy who swills his brew from a bottle in an actual upscale establishment is uncouth.
I'm wondering if Boy was truly ghetto, or rather if before placing bottle on floor certifying that Boy was out of his element, that maybe Boy had decided to do the deed on purpose to embarrass Girl, in some attempt to bring Girl down a notch. Just a passing thought.
Girl asks what I would have done? I'm not sure based on Girl's story alone, but I see nothing wrong with Girl's decision.
Did Girl notice what beer Boy was drinking when girl arrived? If it was Coors Light, Girl may habe had a clue as to what Boy was like.
See personally, i wouldnt have ended the date and no my rent isnt due,lol. I'm just not about hurting people's feelings. The client was willing to part with his hard earned$$ to see you, the woman of his fantasy,this fact would certainly trump any"good etiquette" in my book. I would have just ordered beer to put him at ease and drank it in the most seductive way as a provider, if your safety isnt in jeopardy and the client is respectful to you, why would you cut the date short?
I would have told you to sit on the bottle. Then have the server bring a bottle of jager hold the glasses. Pass it back and forth until we fell off our chairs MP67 style. Jk
The empty on the floor does resemble stadium behavior. I don't know if that merits a cancellation I think something else may have turned you off, or you were already in a bad mood.
Yes your free to do what you want and cancel a date at any time you like, for what ever reason.
Now as far as this thread it's plain bad publicity, wether your right or wrong.
I just oooze allover it, meaning, my center of balance(my bony ass) is in the middle and my limbs and head dangle whichever direction.
I have been known to lay down on the floor with my dogs and talk some kinda drunken gibberish thinking they understand and wake up the next morning like that....
You describe your feelings from the beginning of the date as growing more and more uncomfortable. I can only assume that things would have spiraled out of control and become unbearable by the time you are in private. So you did the right thing by walking out and not subjecting either of you to what would have been an unpleasant night. Returning the envelope was also the right thing to do, since you were pulling out of the "contract." Kudos to you for that.
The only thing you could have done differently was to avoid offending him. (I know that he offended you with his behavior first, but that was most likely not intentional, and you - as a lady - should always be the more tactful one.) You could have come up with an excuse as to why you could not proceed with the appointment. Sure, some may say that lying is not the best way to go, but a little white lie to make him feel better is not any worse than using a stage name (which we all do, even some of the gentlemen!)
The way things happened, he is now left with the impression that he is such an unbearable, undesirable man that you couldn't even put up with him for a few hours for all the money he paid you. Hm. That must not feel good. You could have come back from the restroom and told him that you were very sorry but you just had an emergency (no need to go into details) and you had to go home immediately. You enjoyed the evening so far and were looking forward to the rest of the night, but unfortunately you had to leave, so you would be returning his money. He would have still been disappointed, but could have written it off as an unlucky night, as opposed to "the night he couldn't even get laid for $." With that said, your decision to leave was the right one for you and I'm sure both of you were better off this way.
Personally, I wouldn't have bet an eyelash over his beer bottle mishaps. (Or in the worst case, I would have told him that I’d rather skip dinner and go straight for dessert. Few guys would refuse that! THEN have him cancel the orders and salvage the night by heading home… He was probably more fun in private anyway. Hehe!) If dinner was a must, I would have tried hard to keep the conversation interesting enough so that he doesn’t feel the need to act out in any odd ways. I would have also made sure not to give off any vibes that I’m offended by his behavior, because once he picked up on that, there goes any chance for a good night…
Then again, to me that’s a very minor “offense”. I was taught that part of having good manners is to never embarrass the other person for his lack of such… And after having lived in Los Angeles for 5+ years, I doubt that there is any kind of extravagant behavior that could surprise me. I've been on dates (paid and unpaid) with gentlemen who enjoy adding a little shock value a la Hugh Heffner or Howard Stern style. I'm talking about wearing an expensive suit with Vans, bringing their own seasoning, insisting on getting a table on the patio when it's not open, etc, all in the best restaurants of Beverly Hills . Why do they do it? I guess, because they can! In my experience, there comes a point in most successful men's lives when they no longer care about what others think, they no longer have a need to conform to the mass standard... It's not necessarily something to do with age, money or power. It's just a certain confidence that comes from knowing what you are worth, and that you don't have to impress anyone (especially not the waitstaff or any other hired help, including your companion for the evening) by demonstrating your understanding of proper etiquette; you can just be yourself and it should be more than good enough. I have to admit, I'm attracted to that devil may care attitude.
To each their own, but next time you encounter a bad boy, maybe you could think of Mick Jagger or James Dean. Would you care if they put the bottle on the floor? Fantasy role play, girlfriend!
The conversation with the hostess and waiter was to only halt the dinner order; she halted and did not cancel the meal. The conversation with the staff of the restaurant also had zero - absolutely zero to do with what occurred / was occurring with the Boy or Girl.
I am not exactly certain as to how she broached the cancelation to him but the evening ended.
AND, I am absolutely certain, Mick Jagger or the like would NOT place an empty beer bottle on the floor of an expensive restaurant. Specifically if the table was empty.
She is gorgeous and her attitude makes her even more appealing to me.
As for putting a beer botltle on the floor, while I can't imagine for the life of me why someone would do such a thing, I think Mick Jagger or the like would be EXACTLY the type of person to do so. I also can't imagine a "paid" escort giving me lessons on table manners, which might actually explain his rather boorish manners, perhaps it was his way of telling her that he will act the way he wants? I wasn't there, but speaking strictly for myself, criticizing my table manners would be a perfect way to get me to act like a complete ass as well.
I mean honestly, who needs to impress the wait staff?
I don't treat people rudely, and that includes waitstaff, escorts, down to the guy that parks my car, but there is never any doubt in my mind who is paying who.
I am the kind of guy who takes no as a challenge, except where it comes to a woman's right to say no of course. Rules, with few exceptions only apply to those without the balls to question them, expect of course when your behavior adversely effects that rights of other people. It's like booking a room in Vegas, there is ALWAYS a room for the right person, or at the right price. Sold out only applies to the tourists that don't know better or have the means to have the rules "bent" for them. lol
The boy may not have been comfortable in that situation as I would not have been. According to HER, she attempted gentle guidance, which HE REFUSED. I feel that there is blame enough to go around. I feel SHE over reacted... perhaps too close to a "control freak". HE obsintatly refused guidance. The chemistry was destroyed, meeting over. I give her credit for not only calling it off but also being will to hand the donation back. If she felt strongly enough to do the first, then she did the right thing. Just because this is a compensated evening, does not mean she has to throw reasonable sensibilities out the window. I have been in fancy resturants where a bit of guidance should have been welcomed. The server offered a glass, he should have accepted.
Would I see her? Probably not but I'm not into many star dining... Would I hold it against her? No.
I think you acted 100% appropriately! Assuming the story is accurate to each detail as is seldome the case...
The main point here is that there a loss in attraction at which point to acted accordingly. So long as you did not walk out with the envelope and otherwise embarass the gent I'd say your reaction is spot on!
My mother always told me... you can bring the girl out of the trailerpark... but you can't bring the trailerpark out of the girl! So is the case with guys! Regardless of his level of success; Unfortunately, you cannot buy manners or class!
IMHO I think you acted within reason and did so in an ethical and respectful manner!
While you offered him a glass repeatedly, it doesn't appear clear that he understood *why* you were offering him a glass. He genuinely doesn't sound aware that drinking from a bottle is uncouth in a finer restaurant. Had this been explained to him delicately, his manner might have improved (wishful thinking).
I've been guilty of this before. Not placing an empty on the floor, but drinking from a bottle in a nice restaurant. Sometimes I forget, but usually I just feel like I'm wasting a glass and drinking from the bottle is better for the environment.
If you have manners, you have two options when dealing with someone who wasn't raised with an understanding of manners. (1) You can kindly help them. (2) You can not help them. I don't think option (2) is very polite, so I retract that. The well-mannered person has only one option.
I let my VIP lapse today. Really don't see the point of having it cuz I know who I want to see, and can talk with most everyone else thru email, phone, text, WTF ever.
The only reason I renewed last time was to help a lady friend of mine. It worked.
But something tells me, from my previous post, this'll bite me in the ass. And not in a good way...
I took offense of the lady being pretentious and talking in the third person.
I got blasted with PMs today, for some fucking reason. Can't read them, cuz I'm not VIP anymore.
I just hope said lady isn't one that I'd give your left nut for.
Look. I'm very picky. And as far as this whole thread is concerned, the lady is as well.
What gets me is, her pretentiousness. I'm not a slob, but like Gambler said, I can walk in a dive and have a fucking blast with the locals as well as go to a hoity tioity place and act like I belong there.
I just think, when you put yourself 'above' others, you're showing your need for acceptance.
I can't dig on that.
I have my friends. Of course no one can have enough friends. But it's not the quantity, but the quality.
The OP. Like I said, I hope I didn't shoot myself and make statements that would make her think of me as less than someone she originally considered seeing.
Just have this suspicion of this lady I have a crush on...
But in the same respect, I don't want to see her if I have to watch my P's and Q's every fucking second.
That's not for a relaxing, fun time for either of us.
Respect is respect. Manners are manners. I know this.
But I'd hope, in the future, when I try to make a date with a lady she can turn me on to what she expects from me and I can tell her whether I can deliver or not.
Unless someone is hurting me, putting me in danger or being abusive in some way, they get to be themselves-paid or not. Sorry you were embarrassed, but that is all your own sh*t.
Especially for shows that are uncouth but not necessarily a total "scene".
To read this board you'd think that everyone was in diadems and fucking monocles sometimes.
The noveau riche and faux riche around here kill me.
Interestingly nearly every single obscenely wealthy male or female I've met in this business would never lower themselves to publicly belittling, correcting or removing themselves from the company of a person only mildly offensive.
The punishment most certainly didn't fit the crime. Just seems slightly ridiculous really. Once an envelope touches these hands, more would have to take place to part with it. I almost feel jipped reading this. I would have been more entertained had she left him dick hard at the restaurant,and left with the envelope as a keepsake for him wasting her time...
I will assume one of two thing happened. He felt like being tolerant of his behavior was included in the fee or his nerves got the best of him. I have been on countless dinner dates and I must say there are tricks to the trade to prevent an outcome such as this.
At the end of the day, I firmly believe the lady is most responsible for the way things are handled and eventually play out.
Dinner dates and public pageantry are not for everyone.
Knowing who you are could help put the situation into the proper context.
I'm wondering if you are "Kacey Daniels International Companion," one of New York’s most sought after Luxury Companion for social activities and private explorations, who is "Desired internationally by high level gentlemen of sophistication..."
Would you be the Kasey Daniels whos wrote
"Gentlemen:
Please pardon my direct approach as I would like to spare you from the formulaic drivel of grandeur and suggest that we immediately begin by exploring your needs and desire. Afterwhich, you can learn all about me by visiting my website and reading my very eclectic and slightly eccentric blog. For now, let's shine our focus on what really matters; let's talk about you.
About You:
• You are a selective, emotionally secure and emotionally mature Gentleman that desire a connection and / or enhancement that's filled with romance, sensuality and very 'intimate' intimacy.
• You would not consider embracing an interaction that does not provide this level of emotional openess, that varies on a multitude of levels.
• For you, it would be meaningless to just have a connection based solely on just our physical compatiability; that's too basic, too common and generally unfulfilling.
• You desire a meaningful sort of encounter and prefer to spend your time and resources on quality Companionship...that is where I come along!
I give you that uncomplicated interaction filled with good conversation, passionate seduction and comfort. What makes our relationship perfect is that I quietly fade away...but linger happily...in your memory... until we meet again...at your convenience.
If this is what you seek then I welcome you with open arms (and a sweet, sweet kiss!).
Kindly visit my website for additional details.
Bisous,
xo Kasey xo"
The reason I'm asking is that I'm wondering (without knowing you) if your viewpoint and interpretation of this clients social behaviors come from standards set or your experiences in Europe or other parts of the world.
Sometimes American's behavior is considered to be less refined than in other parts of the world. I'm wondering if this had any effect on how you felt in this situation.
Let me relate a story:
When entertaining some friends of mine from Luxenberg, I found it interesting that eating any food, including pizza or fries, with one's hands was difficult for them to adapt to. And so it was when we had part of our meal wrapped 'to go' at a restaurant. My friends said that 'back home' that was considered EXTREMELY low class. Now, when over a lovely steak dinner, Swen said he couldn't wait to "get back home and have a delicious horse steak", my date, an equestrian show rider almost lost her dinner right there on her plate. She couldn't eat after that, hence we had her meal wrapped to go.
Such a situation could have made for tensions that ruined an evening or a friendship. But everyone one at dinner understood that we all had our own set of sensibilities that came from our living in very different sociatal influences, and that our reactions and thoughts were not personally directed at the other person or persons. More important than whether we eat horse or dog, or even pick up BBQ ribs with our hands (those fuckers ate their pizza with a knife and fork, fuckin' embarrasing!!) was that we wanted to understand each other, share ourselves with each other, and base our thoughts on mutual respect and tolerance.
After the uncomforatable steak dinner, we went back to my place, smoked a blunt, drank shots of ine tequila, and listened to some Norwegian Death Metal. We had a great time!
So, my question about who you are, and possibly being someone who's social sensibilities are influenced by non-American culture could explain why you felt as you did when Boy met Girl. And also explain why Girl got reamed by Boys and Girls on the TER GD board.
I'm no country rube, I've had dinner in 5 star restaurants in several international cities.
I don't get why drinking out of a bottle is so awful. Often glasses given in restaurants are not chilled and the beer stays colder in the bottle. And putting it on the floor could have been a response to your (her) discomfort in having it seen.
"Girl might have wanted to return to the restaurant at a later date and perhaps with another Boy- but may now be forever known as the Girl that was with the Boy who put the bottle on floor."
This is a bit mind boggling. I am quite sure few would notice and virtually no one would remember. People MIGHT WELL REMEMBER the pretty woman who placed a white envelope on the table or handed it to her date at the table before she walked out on him. Anyone who saw that, particularly the restaurant staff, would know she is a provider.
No, I'm not sure. However, if she felt strongly enough about his empty beer bottle on the floor, I'm assuming she probably returned the envelope in a way as to not cause notice from others ---but that's my imagination of the story.
That's one hell of a thread. As a newbie, it's been eyeopening.
Here's what I think, if anybody cares. There are two ways of interpreting this story.
Either he was hopelessly nervous, maybe even his first time with a provider, first time on a public date, or first time in such a fancy place. Compounded by the fact that he got there first, he ordered a beer just because it's what he knows and it's comforting, he might have been caught off guard when you came in and the table was ready. At the table, he doesn't know what to do with his beer bottle, realizing it's out of place and panics. Instead of trying to make him feel better, you act like a snob and walk out on him. The poor guy, who met you to try and fulfill some unmet emotional need in his life now feels utterly worthless.
Or, he didn't give a rats ass about your comfort level and get's shirty and defiant when you ask him not to do something that you find embarrassing. His attitude is that he's paid for it so he can do what he likes with it, and his behaviour, the way that he talks to you, or other cues, make you feel that he's going to treat you the same way. So you bail, before he get's the chance to demand that you give him head in the bathroom.
The truth may lie someplace in the middle, of course but as the reader, it's too easy to bring assumptions and past personal experience into which interpretation is thought valid, hence the argument.
Okay, ignore all that. The long and short of it is that only you know what really happened. Nobody on this board can give you the answer as to weather you're a snob or a smart girl looking out for her own welfare.
Great decision by the girl. Wish she was mine. The guy was being a slob and a jerk. Fancy resturant and he drinks beer out of bottle? Probably does not respect the word no, either.
Many scenarios have been hatched based on my original post. If I were a fly on the wall than I would be more then happy to provide a concise explanation as to what occurred exactly after - and during this date. In the interim everyones mind seems to have run completely mad with imagination as to how the entire evening ended!
Perhaps I am to fault for that --- perhaps we (everyone that commented) are in the same sort of wrong as the Girl - in terms of the (perceived) extreme overreaction.
In a nut shell Girl was unhappy that the Boy placed the bottle on the floor. She kept the fact of the loud swigging to herself. I guess, just as one would do if they saw something that was frown worthy but not enough to make a stink about.
Her boiling point - to my understanding - was his persistence in keeping the bloody bottle on the floor. That is cause for any person to have a bit of pause; while the Girl paused she concluded that she could not go any further. It was her judgement call - and her reason was she felt uncomfortable. Ladies, isn't that rule #1 in our Companion Handbook?
As for my identity, that's neither here nor there as we are not speaking of me and what I've done, I'm just the messenger (Shalom).
So for those that shared their kind loving words of advise (ex:...shove the bottle up your arse) and kind compliments (ex: get over yourself, nouveux riche bitch...) - I'm sending you a big cyber hug. I mean not to have a pissing contest with you but your replies towards me was just a bad as you assumed Girls reaction to be.
I mean you no harm.
Goodnight.
K
PS: For those that have sent me private messages, I haven't any access as I am not a member. I am easy to find
I saw your site, and everything you wrote on there can be directly linked to this thread and your sense of using 'the third person' in your tale.
Basically, you're full of shit.
You're hot. I'll give you that. But you THINK you're pulling the wool over everybody's eyes when you brought up this shit-storm. You're not.
I'll admit there were doubts till HH did a little detective work. Convinced my ass. That, and the fact Gambler and LP know everything, which totally fucked your shit up!
I imagine you're a fantastic fuck, and feel the need to be treated with the utmost respect and can pick and choose your clients.
That's all good and well. BUT, you went and posted your shit in the den of inequity.
The GD is the worst place to make a statement, and garner respect, unless you're truly ready to get shit on in the process.
You got guys that've fucked hookers longer than you've been alive. Some ladies have been doing this just as long, also.
Take it from a drunken asshole that takes every and all adversery. You need to pick your battles.
I'll be more than happy to coach you in the finer arts of fighting on the boards.
First, thanks for the compliment. Secondly, Of course it sounds like me as I constructed the post (in my own narrative) on behalf of a situation that was shared with me. Any other way, well GIRL could have posted it herself.
This did not occur to me as if it did then I am being a very naughty girl and have essentially been indiscreet by sharing extensive details of an encounter.
Cheers, K
Posted By: MP67
I saw your site, and everything you wrote on there can be directly linked to this thread and your sense of using 'the third person' in your tale.
Basically, you're full of shit.
You're hot. I'll give you that. But you THINK you're pulling the wool over everybody's eyes when you brought up this shit-storm. You're not.
I'll admit there were doubts till HH did a little detective work. Convinced my ass. That, and the fact Gambler and LP know everything, which totally fucked your shit up!
I imagine you're a fantastic fuck, and feel the need to be treated with the utmost respect and can pick and choose your clients.
That's all good and well. BUT, you went and posted your shit in the den of inequity.
The GD is the worst place to make a statement, and garner respect, unless you're truly ready to get shit on in the process.
You got guys that've fucked hookers longer than you've been alive. Some ladies have been doing this just as long, also.
Take it from a drunken asshole that takes every and all adversery. You need to pick your battles.
I'll be more than happy to coach you in the finer arts of fighting on the boards.
Or when it gets so out of hand that either myself or LP is forced to step in and close it. I don't see any reason to close this thread just because the OP doesn't like the reactions she is getting.
I never mentioned anything about closing this thread. I was just summing things up and putting things back into perspective. "In conclusion" under this context does not mean close the thread!
I am not that sensitive....
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I requested it. No harm no foul.
Thanks! K
Posted By: GaGambler
Or when it gets so out of hand that either myself or LP is forced to step in and close it. I don't see any reason to close this thread just because the OP doesn't like the reactions she is getting.
a very unofficial tally seems like the general thinking (almost 3 to 1 against) is that the "Girl's" decision was at best an overreaction to the situation as stated (with a handful of waffling fence sitters).
But for all the vehemence, even amongst those most vocally disdainful of the Girl (moi!) there was a respectful recognition that any woman has the right to cancel any date in which she feels uncomfortable.
So Ms. Daniels and her illusory Girl friend can revel in the knowledge that even the unruly mob on this board unanimously supports her desire to stay safe. But a fair majority of us seem to just wish they could take the stick out of their collective ass while doing so.
I think you should stay in YOUR PERSONAL comfort level. He obviously annoyed and embarassed you. I however, would have gone on with the evening personally, but I don't blame you one bit for bailing. So nice of you to give the envelope back...when someone pisses me off I keep it.
I've met guys at nice resturants before(and not even REALLY nice ones at that)and sometimes they don't know how to behave. I HATE it when anyone I'm with...be it friend,client, or my father...decides to whistle to the waitress or hold up their glass when she/he is across the room. While I don't frequent any 5 star resturants I would be highly annoyed at his behavior but I'd never be seen in the resturant again besides...
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