Years and years ago, before the Internet, I sat in a bar in New York with the first provider I'd ever become friendly with.  She was exotic and foreign, and had traveled all over the world as an escort; I was young and dazzled by her.  "Isn't it fascinating -- what you do? -- with all these guys and all this travel, and the challenges of all the situations you get into?" I asked.

"It's boring," she replied.  "I'm bored.  I've done it all.  I'm burned out."  She sighed and finished her drink.  "I want to go to Brazil and smuggle emeralds back here in my pussy."

Some time later, on a Saturday afternoon, I took her up to the Cloisters. She told me about a video she was acting in, and dinner parties she'd been to. I told her about, of all things, my mother.  

I'd see her at the brothel and wait across the street till she got off.  We'd take long walks back to her place, talking all the way.  The place she lived, the Lower East Side, was a slum then; now it's trendy and expensive.  Once off work, she was restless and often grumpy, and she complained ceaselessly about boredom and burnout.

We lost touch...there was no email or Google in those days.

I think of her often.  I wonder if she ever got to Brazil.  

And I wonder -- do many providers burn out?  And if so, why?

Don't kid yourself, there's nothing "fascinating" about being a sex-mule, just think if the tables were turned and you had to crank out 4 or 5 nuts per day in unattractive chatter-box women who were out of shape and past their prime for cash? Does that sound "glamorous"?? That's hell on earth!
 And don't further kid yourself about her crock of shit about smuggling "emeralds" in her snatch either... She was probably stuffing her gash with compresses heroine pellets and smuggling them into this country...  

If it was as many years ago as you indicate, I imagine she's dead by now...

-- Modified on 12/19/2008 9:51:52 PM

Whatever truth there may or may not be in your post is obliterated in your incomparable cynicism, stupendous generalizations, gutter style (if you can call it that), and unchecked egotism that is matched only by your twin brother, Scuzzy.

The amazing thing is that people point out an intelligent and thoughtful man like gregory12 and say how he is so cynical.  If ANYONE needs to know the true meaning of Christmas, it is you and your twin.

Why, God, why do I read your posts?  I will try better next time.




-- Modified on 12/20/2008 1:28:35 AM

It appears that's what you do, whether it be Christmas, Easter, or the Fourth of July!
 You go ahead and live in your fantasy that this hobby is all rainbows and lemon drops, and all these women are highly successful, honest people that actually WANT to be with you when you're paying them for their time and the money in the envelope is just a formality! I'm sure they look forward to sucking your wrinkled weiner and putting toys in your ass just for the sheer thrill of it!

You fucking retard! WAKE UP! I've enjoyed this hobby for over 20 years, seen way over a thousand women and gotten to know many of them outside of the "biz", therefore when I "generalize" from the position of having seen the dirty underbelly of this business,and have known many many gals from their teens until they're "over the hill", so I speak from eye witness account when I say such things and make these VERY TRUE statements! The long-term chances for a happy, successful life among providers is SMALL, not impossible, but small... Those that retire happy, in love, with saved money, good health, and a guilt-free conscience are FEW and far between!

Go sniff your pap smear sticks and keep telling yourself the same big lie you've been telling yourself all along you out-of-touch moron!

-- Modified on 12/19/2008 10:54:22 PM

It was ages ago the Mr Self Destruct used to be a bit edgy and the moderators were the hieght of decorum. Hmmmm....  

But Robbin, I am not really sure how you do not find the post worth defending.  I don't buy the schock and awe stuff.  We all know that does not work now, don't we..

Your depiction may be true, but I think it calls into question your humanity if you so willing exploit those who are living in "hell on earth".

Does it ever give you pause?

Our definitions of humor are light years apart, first of all.  How a post like that appears even REMOTELY "funny" (tee hee!) to a person in the group he is addressing is beyond me.  To me, that is like a person of color laughing when he is made fun of for his color over and over by the same two people (as happens on these boards).

And no, I won't "lighten up" when groups of very kind people (who I know) who will never have the "privilege" of talking in person to these two (as you have) will only see or hear of their rude and "seemingly" extremely offensive posts directed at anyone in their profession.  I have known many ladies in this business who have not REMOTELY been like the women that they portray in posts exactly like this one that prompted my reply.

Whatever your motivation to have had that discourse with them so that you could learn that they are such wonderful chaps and complete gentlemen and that all of this posturing they do on the boards is just for fun (tee hee!) is something that likely I would never have (as I have nothing to offer them like you do), so I can only judge them by the filth that is spewed out on the boards...insulting women who are in the profession, insulting women who are not young and trim, insulting anyone who cares about these groups of people, etc.  

I can laugh at South Park making fun of all types of people because it is removed from any sort of serious forum.  However, this is a place where ALL sorts of people in this arena come together, in lightness, in seriousness, and in business.  To see the caustic and insulting posts that are made by these fine "gentlemen" put up there for anyone and everyone's consumption is not something that I can possibly look at as just "kidding around".

TER mods are not saints, but most TER members would think they would lead by example.  The posts from these two are often very insulting (how many times has at least ONE person said that in reply to one of their threads?).  How is that something that we should just be grateful for?  I have known two other mods myself, and both were respectful, communicative, fun people who contributed good things to their boards...as opposed to trying to shock people and pass it off as humor.  That people who say such caustic things about the people this board supposedly supports have been moderators just makes the head spin.

If this is your idea of "getting it" and being in "the know", I am glad I am naive.  Some human values are universal, and I am happy to seem like someone who is humorless to adhere to those values.  I would be happy to feel that way if everyone else on the board is laughing at it and no one seems to think that the posts are insulting (although it seems a couple already have).

I don't know you from Adam, but I have been on these boards for about six years now, so I do think I have an idea how they are, and there was a time that there never were posts like these.  That there are now just supports my feeling that we have come a long way...down.  Kickass to you...sickass to me.  

The one thing you did say to me that makes sense is to ignore them, which I really have tried to do, but will now FORCE myself to do.

I don't care what you do for a living we all go thru periods of burnout, from CEO's all the way down the ladder. Most of the time we bounce back but some don't. Stress is hard on the body, mind and soul so a little diverson helps even if it means smuggleing emeralds into the country. When I get burn't out I go hobbying.

Look...I guess the issue is as follows:
~ There was a time long ago (MSDestruct obviously remembers this era) when TER not only was a great forum and a way to identify quality providers, but also communicated an "ethos" for the hobby. It appears to me that the warning at the top of the discussion forum (no flames, etc.) appears to no longer be the case. It is a vestige of the old TER.  Moderators used to (by the way) appear differently on the page (in green or red?) and often would keep us hobbiests within the lmits of gentlemanly behavior.
Humor, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder, so this is not the debate. Providers can attest to what it is like to have a self centered pig as a client. TER can help to educate both hobbiests AND providers which does make this a rewarding 'hobby'.  
Yes I am getting older, but I still recall MSDestruct getting scolded a bit and I was too by a provider on this board who was once a major voice on the boards and who passed away this last year in NYC.
After licking my wounds, I thought about what she said, accepted that I COULD BE WRONG, and learned something about the hobby.
Moderators are not excluded in the learning curve.
Peace.

Provider Burnout?? My God. Without a doubt. FOR SOME not all!  Girls that see a multitude of clients daily are on a sure road to burnout and for some girls unfortunatly  doing this have NO choice for many reasons we're not getting into now.  I'm low volume mainly because I have a real life career and do this a few times a month for fun and extra spending money  My focus is quality as opposed to quanity.  You gentlemen MUST understand that doing this Providing thing does take a piece of all of us. Some a smaller piece then others
Quanity = Burnout.  Plain and simple!  Just go and read some of the reviews of Busy Well Known Providers doing this awhile with page after page of reviews, you'll see that although most are stellar there comes a few where a hobbyist feel that the woman is mechanical and just going thru the motions  Quanity = Burnout
My opinion only
Jay

You can practically SEE when providers burnout if you read all of their reviews and note the trends (it would take someone about 15 minutes to ascertain my two burnout periods in my body of reviews); you can also see when they have recouped their waning interest and are excited about providing again.

You put your g-string and garters in a suitcase and live out of hotels for a few months, playing cat & mouse with LE, being targeted by unscrupulous providers, having your identity compromised by stalkers and sorting out the needs of clients (most of whom are seeing us for every other reason BUT NSA sex).
You experience overweight, unattractive, unappealing and unskilled people utilizing your service and then critically referring to YOU as unattractive or dull for hundreds of thousands of people to see (despite your obvious best efforts and kindness towards them) for a little while and see how it weighs on you.

It is a business like any other-
And like other professionals our "career" is tiring, grating and redundant after years on end.
Unlike other professionals however, this is something that you don't leave the office to escape.  It's permanently ingrained in your head and written upon your character.

Once you've become an escort, the realities of men, love, lust, marriage/partnership are laid bare- and it is nothing like the fairytales.

Smart providers who feel themselves burning out mentally and physically take substantial amounts of time off.

Someone once said to me:  "Ally you'll never survive this business because it is a business of exploitation and you're too smart, too aware- its going to drive you mad"

I'm like a sponge- I soak up the criticism that I read here and on other boards, the neurosis of some of my clients and other undesirable/complicated elements of the business.
I have an unfortunate habit of internalizing it, taking it personal and over thinking it.

When I feel the cynicism creeping in and as though I can't relate to my clients or give them the person that I was when I entered the business I stop providing for a time and allow myself to RESET:
Never forgetting what I have learned for practical reference and use, I am unavailable until I am physically wanting and mentally able to turn my brain off.

Having spent time with many providers in a short amount of time I think that the providers who are less-inclined to burnout are those who are in it for no other reason than the money.
I think that they are the ONLY providers who are able to completely forgo personal evaluation in favor of their favorite drug, body & mind numbing cash spending.

I think that "good" providers fall into two categories:

a) New Entries (less than 1 year in the business, fresh and happy)-voluntary entries only, not victims of circumstance or those who provide as a means to an end (new car, tuition, medical bills etc)

b) Those who are aware of their propensity for burnout.  They recognize that they can only experience X amount of volume, can only tour for so many weeks, they can only glance at the boards ever so often, etc. and they modify their habits accordingly taking time off when necessary.

-- Modified on 12/20/2008 6:03:52 AM

But we are not the moderators of the GD-board, so our usernames appear in black here just as everyone elses...

 As to this "ethos" you speak of, that was concocted tripe! The days of fart-sniffing etiquette ae thankfully BEHIND us! One thing that was ALWAYS missing in the "days of old" you hearken back to was the FREEDOM to express a counter-opinion!
 Notice that I haven't once suggested that Mr. Self-destruct NOT express his opinion of me, the hobby or anything on his mind! He is always entitled to express his wrong-opinions as I am mine. The TRUE problem arises when someone [especially a moderator] decides that only one viewpoint is "acceptable" and takes action to "squelch" a view that they or the monger-majority doesn't agree with! BTW, I also miss Miki the MILF's opinion [which I almost never agreed with]

As to your foolish statement about a "Rewarding 'hobby', don't kid yourself! The 'rewards' you speak of are cash for the lady and an ORGASM or two for the men! If those two fundamentals were absent, then the hobby wouldn't exist!

There is never a need to personally attack another for what one may percieve as a "flaw".  We are all people with feelings and hearts.  
I don't find humor in calling people Morons because their opinion is different than my own.  And, I don't find humor in attacking BBW's and mature providers on the boards.  Some of the finest gentlemen I have ever met have issues with their weight (and are older) and I am sure they do not like it so no need for me to point it out and make them feel less than because of it.  If they are gentlemen and treat me like a lady, I could care less.

I have recently PM'd with Fuzzy and in the PM's he was very kind to me.  He seemed human and seemed to have a heart!  But, he is a different person on the boards.  I think people would see him in a different light if he expressed his emotions with less hostility.    I have never had occasion to speak with  Ben but I am sure the same could be said for him.

JMO, thank you for allowing me to post my thoughts.

No, he takes takes the money he made from "exploiting" the misfortunes of others and lived his life! I do the same as the hobby goes... Women rarely "choose" the hobby as a direct career-path, most "end up" in the hobby by any number of forces in their lives, be it their own fault or by circumstances put on them by others or simply by "life" it's self. Just like how people end up in 'foreclosure"...

So, my "humanity" is at peace with this hobby, since I always PAY whatever the pre-arranged fee for the girls time & sex was set at. Then I know that at least as far as my interaction with her in concerned, she was treated with as much 'respect" as she had asked for...

-- Modified on 12/21/2008 5:41:19 AM

when Fuzzy and Ben post on the General Discussion Board they are posting in their individual capacity as TER members rather than as moderators, unless they use the bright red coding for their names.

In this capacity I think they are entitled to same wide range of humor/comments as are all TER members. Whether you like this kind of coarse humor or not, their posts are never mean spirited.

Even Ben at his most extreme is simply being provocative rather than mean spirited.

So long as they do not cross this line, I have no problem with their posts, although Fuzzy definitely made me think with a few pictures that "I want my click back.


When I've dealt with Fuzzy as a moderator he has always been fair and professional.

-- Modified on 12/20/2008 10:48:25 AM

You know I find intelligence irresistible

...How I must hate my work.

It would seem that when faced with realities of the business most clients react not with empathy but rather personal sensitivity.

Thanks for cropping up, internet crush of mine.


-- Modified on 12/20/2008 9:52:58 AM

The OP shared a personal story, and asked a sincere question. I do not recognize his handle so he may be new. I was quite confused when Ben Dover's post did not match the tenor of the OP's, and concerned that such responses could very well discourage someone, new the the boards, from asking questions that reflect any personal vulnerability or sincere inquiry. I'm glad that some of the ladies have given him responses more in line with what he was seeking.

Those fools who think there is a higher standard to this hobby?!
The ladies just want cash! OK Benscrooge, in a few days you will be visited by 3 spirits

The spirit of TER of days gone by (Miki and Sandiego)
The spirit of TER today (look in the mirror)
and then of tomorrow. (not even the orgasm brings pleasure)

If you learn anything, it will be that sometimes the smile you bring to a providers face is...priceless.

I am afraid you just don't get it.

I think we can fairly assume that the advent of  the Internet and TER has brought a new inflow of ladies into this business who are more business savvy, educated, and health conscious than the ladies you’ve met over the past 20 years, as well as a new inflow of comparable male clients.

         At least with respect to the independents, it has eliminated the “management” that has caused a lot of the problems these ladies have experienced. And most important of all, a lot of these ladies have entered the business because they see it as a very attractive business opportunity and profess that they enjoy what they do. Many of the older group became providers, at lest according to some studies, because they concluded that they had no other realistic alternative.

        Will their futures be as bleak as the ladies you have known? Will only a very small number  retire rich and happy? Well, no one knows that yet. But I don’t think it is valid to use your experience with the pre-Internet ladies as a predictor of the future for this new, fundamentally different group.

      And this distinction might be a good point to keep in mind the next time you plan to make one of your scorched earth posts about the ladies.

The cold reality is that I do get it! it's some of you other poor saps that need to look deeper into this hobby and see it for what it is!
I've been doing this a looong time, I've helped countless girls with their abusers, paid for motel rooms for some trying to "run away" from their boyfriend/pimps, taken girls to the hospital after they've been beaten, let a few stay in my home while they try and pull their lives together, even taken some underaged girls down to MN-Teen-Challenge and dropped them off to try and get them help for their meth-habbits that cause them to suck dick in alleys for drug-money...
 I've also been privy to several cases of extortion/vindictive behavior of older gals seeking retribution from men that DARED review them honestly, seen families destroyed when providers used all the collected information from "verification" to contact their families/employers and expose them, etc, etc...

Soo, If I'm a "scrouge" like you say, it's because I've come to realize that for the most part this hobby ONLY attracts individuals that are DYSFUNCTIONAL in one aspect of their lives or another, and are in self-denial about their fucked up lives!

So when you've spent 20+ years in the hobby, spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on providers, hookers and strippers, visited countless AMPS across America, and picked up scores of street-walkers like I have, then let's see if you still have your glossy, naive, rainbows & lemondrops view of the lives of people that suck your cock and fuck you for cash!

this is one of the stupidest comparison I have ever heard! plus bsing only urself ben!

-- Modified on 12/21/2008 10:35:47 AM

It really said everything I could possibly say and more!

I was told that I won't last in escorting because "You are too nice a person."

I am returning to escorting after close to 10 months of a break. I was burnt out because
- I didn't take better care of my body and rest enough
- didn't set clearer boundaries
- was really getting depressed and affected by timewasters, downright rude, arrogant and condescending men not to mention sheer stupidity
- then there were the 'bad' clients who were always trying to reduce your rate or take more time than agreed on it

This time round, I am gentler, more loving to myself, faster in saying no and trusting that I will attract the right gentlemen who will be gentle, kind, loving and giving towards me.

I assume you asked this question because
- you cared for her in your own way
- wonder what happened to her
- maybe nostalgic because Xmas is just round the corner.

I have posted my answer via a separate post. I am sorry the board attacked you.

BUT,
To appreciate what we have now, we must have gone through that period of our lives....when we were younger.  That is HOW we know what we do today....

Look forward to seeing you Robbin....

Male44