When I post anywhere on TER, I make it a point to end my message with a comment that goes something like this:
“Please don’t PM me as I do not have access to those on TER.  Please email me directly.”

This is because when I first received limited VIP access as a provider, a little mailbox symbol popped up on the upper left (if I remember correctly) corner of my screen.  When I clicked on it, there were a TON of messages there—some that were a year old, all unread!  I went through and deleted the old ones and replied to the more recent ones, apologizing for not responding sooner and explaining that I did not know I had any messages.

Shortly after, the little mailbox symbol disappeared.  I contacted TER a number of times trying to explain that I couldn’t access my PMs anymore, but clearly there was a lack of understanding as the staff kept referring me back to the post describing what limited provider VIP entailed.  So I eventually just “let it go” and assumed I was not allowed access to PMs with my limited status.  I did not spend much time on TER anyhow, just the occasional post, so it was no big deal.

But recently, I’ve been participating more and more on the boards.  While my eyes normally do not go farther to the right than the “discussion boards” menu button, they did the other night.  And there I saw it—MAIL.  And then I clicked on that blue MAIL button.  And then….

D’OH!!!  

I feel so foolish and embarrassed!  I recently made a public post (okay, okay, so it was a pseudo-rant LOL) on a city board defending myself when a gent complained that I did not respond to his many inquiries.  See, I pride myself on returning every single non-offensive email I receive as promptly as I can.  The technology toys in my life make this easier than making phone calls.  But now I see how many gents contacted me regarding trips to their city and how many ladies offered words of support and friendship--and I completely, unknowingly, blew all of them off!!  

So I publicly apologize to those of you who have contacted me and did not receive a response.  I was not being rude or ignoring anyone, I just honestly had no idea that little MAIL button existed!  I hope you have not given up on me.  Apologies also to the staff at TER who probably assumed I was an illiterate flake.  Sheesh!

Lastly, look out, because now I just might go PM crazy on y’all!

Embarrassed but hugging nonetheless,
Selena Scott

My main one is trying to remember all the damn usernames passwords that I have. You don't want to have only one-- because then one of those pesky spies will get everything. But I get so embarrassed and aggravated to forget a password that sometimes I steer away from the website.

That somehow, you were unaware that you were being PM'ed on TER, as oppsoed to being e-mailed externally?  Yippers...no doubt many felt you were "blowing them off", when in fact you didn't intend to.  I have to ask, though, didn't you see the "You have mail" under your user name when signing on?  Regardless, you seem to have your heart in the right place re: apologizing, and most of us hobbyists will extend you ladies almost infinite patience in matters such as these.  As for going PM crazy...believe me, us hobbyists never mind being contacted by you ladies, even if it's just trivial commentary or to just say hi!

between VIP statuses.

I spent hours replying to people explaining what happened.

I don't see why the management doesn't just remove the envelope when you are not VIP, or at least forward a warning message to those who try and send mail that the person can no receive it.

I guess they figure it will encourage more members to get VIP, and I have to admit it worked in my case,but still, it's not fair to the people who send mail and don't realize their missives are not getting through.

That message doesn't come up when I sign in.  I'm assuming it's a limited membership kind of thing.  So that's why I was clueless.

Shining on, though.  ;>

I'm right there with you Selena, I went almost 3 yrs. without knowing I had mail here?  Yikes, talk about feeling inept, I did write to them to tell them what a dope I'd been not realizing I could check my mail without the VIP membership.  But I still felt bad.  Kristi

I was surprised to see the "you have mail" a few times.
skb

then again, I have no mail.

I am new on this board, am having a tricky time navigating my way around this maze..so if anyone has tips, please e mail me directly. All guidance would be appreciated.
Sitara

Sounds like you had quite the time trying to figure things out. hehe.

Glad to hear you figured it out!

Katie

This kind of stuff happens all the time.  The fact that you own up says lots about your character, but don't worry about it.  We clients have endured lots of episodes of called-emailed-messaged without a response and we've learned to live with it.  Rock on!

by clicking on the "Mail" link on top next to "Online chats" ....