This is an off the wall thread but maybe the ladies can give me a little help. I have been struggling to find a good way to describe myself (in a few words) when I tell providers what I look like. My TER handle is a now a misnomer. I am 6' weight 245 but I am not fat. At one time I weighed 274 (44 in waist) and was fat but since then I have worked out regularly at least 3 times a week and gotten into fairly good shape.

Here is the reason for the description quandary. When I work out, I lift heavy amounts of weight unlike the bodybuilders who lift to tone. So although I am quite muscular, I don't look shall we say "cut". For the guys who enjoy lifting here are a few items from the facts sheet. I can easily leg press over 900 pounds multiple times per set. I have done squats with 400 lbs or more and do multiple sets of bench presses with the 70 , 80, 90 and 100 pound dumbbells. That said, I lift a lot of weight.

Now I know I am opening myself up for some well deserved if not overdue humor since I tend to snipe and run but with the facts, and without going into all this detail ...

How does one describe them self to a provider in a few words?

OFF

BTW - I have considered changing my handle to OCF ... Oldest Cut Fart but nuff said. LOL!

I give them my height, my approx weight, average build, hair color (what hair I have left), glasses, and what I'll probably be wearing. So far, no one has run away screaming and fearing permanent retinal damage (knock on wood).

Hi OFF - you could almost be describing me. Before my military career effectively ended with an injury, I was 6'1 and a very lean (actually dehydrated in the mountains of Afghanistan) but muscular 230. I was non ambulatory for quite a while and had to get back in training. I'm lifting 40-50,000 lbs a week in a mixture of high rep lower weight sets and high weight lower rep sets. I have not gotten back to what I could do a few years ago. So I am now 6'1 and 255, with a bit of softness (and the sagginess that sometimes comes with age). I have a 40" waist now instead of the 35/36 I had. So I am very slowly losing some of the extra weight.

That being said, I tell the ladies that I am a muscular but 25lbs overweight, generally scary looking man of 6'1 with graying hair, a silver mustache and goatee and a body covered in silver hair (other than my crank which is nicely groomed) like an old ape. Guess what - the ladies seem to like me just fine. A little self deprecating humor, and generally not taking ones self too seriously, goes a long way. Interestingly, I have found that most of the ladies I've gotten to know think of themselves as being more flawed, than I think of myself (terrible grammar, live with it...)

Best of luck in your continued program of health improvement - we've gotta do all we can to keep ourselves going at our age/
Cheers

Gregory

you lift a lot of weight.  that just tells us you are strong.  strong doesn't always equal not fat.  you were probably morbidly obese before, now just fat.  just say you are husky with a FAT wallet, I think that will work best. lol

Re: In general looks do not matter to escorts

Please forgive my English if I make mistakes, as I my first language is French. When contacting a provider you should always include a general description of yourself so we can form general idea of your personality. What you look like physically is irrelevant, as we do not decide to have sex with someone based on physical attractiveness. My service will always be better when a person is likeable, warm funny and genuine (do I need to mention super clean?). I always find it humorous when someone insists in telling me he is attractive. If physical attractiveness were an important factor we would not be good service providers.

Hello OFF!

In my real life, I only date strong men.

My exes were all bodybuilders and my actual boyfriend is too.

Nothing, but nothing compares to be fucked by a guy who can leg press or squat 900 lbs!

Lifting weights also makes you gain natural ENDURANCE and be able to flip a lady easy or hold her into positions many guys cannot handle because they are not in good physical shape.

I know few guys like you, they are called POWER LIFTERS.

And I think that's the way you should describe yourself to the ladies.

Don't ever lie about your age, because we know what a 60 year old looks like and the worse thing is a guy who looks 60 trying to pass for a 40! Not saying you're doing that but I've seen many guys trying to pass or describe themselves like they were 20 years ago.

You can say:

I am *** years old, 6' tall and 245 lbs. I workout *** days a week. I don't have the body of a bodybuilder because I am not one of them. I am a "power lifter" meaning, I am a big bodied guy with the strength of a working horse!

Add anything you want after that, the lady receiving your description will make a mental visualization and you will do just fine with her.

If you can, add a picture of you working out at the gym. If you don't want to show your face, blurr it. Or show an angle where you're facing away from the camera.

Don't worry about showing your sweaty body...is a turn on for most women!

We KNOW how horny and how much a guy is able to fuck after a couple hours of hard workout! His testosterone is in it's higher level and he just need one thing to calm his animal instincts ~~~~

PUSSY!!!

I hope this helps.

BDG

I guess I belong to the crew of women who find something beyond the physical attractive in men. I enjoy men of all shapes and sizes and colors, and what usually draws me to them are their interests and passions in life as well as their charming and kind personalities. I know that a personality is hard to get to know untill you meet a person in real time, but knowing about a mans life vision and interests really is what I gravitate towards when it comes to dating.
--Sitara

I've never been asked and I've never offered. My body description is far from ideal, but it's never been an issue after we've finally met (as far as I could tell).

I've always dotted and crossed all the required "i's and t's". Clean, courteous, punctual (arrival AND departure) and I never haggle.

I’ve never had a problem repeating with anyone. So I’d suggest that you try not bringing it up again.


-- Modified on 9/13/2008 3:15:59 PM

to get it and are proud of their efforts.

Men love to receive compliments, just like girls.

When I get a client who has a nice fit body (no need to be a bodybuilder), I always compliment the body parts that are firm and muscular to the touch and we talk about their gym routine. Guys LOVES when a woman shows interest on what they do to improve themselves!

Is not only telling "ohhh you have a great dick", is an ego boost for them when we notice the results of their hard work at the gym.

Today, specially where I live and work, the lifestyle is very competitive (work & pleasure), so men goes to the gym almost every day and I seldom see an overweight guy. When I see one, usually they come from the suburbs or are visiting from other parts of the country.

Quote - "Nothing, but nothing compares to be fucked by a guy who can leg press or squat 900 lbs! Lifting weights also makes you gain natural ENDURANCE and be able to flip a lady easy or hold her into positions many guys cannot handle because they are not in good physical shape."

It is funny you say that cause there was a lady I saw for a while (since retired) that I would pick up and carry from place to place without stopping what we were doing. In addition, many times I would hold her by the ankles or knees keeping her tight against me while only her back or front touched the bed or the table depending on where we were at the time.

Damn I miss her! We had a great time.

Last week, I had a session with a very strong guy.

He is a retired police officer, used to be a gym rat on his days and even with extra soft padding over his muscles, his strength was just unbelievable.

He did your "move", I was laying down on my back in the bed and he was standing in front of me.

I felt like I weighted not more than a bunch of feathers when he grabbed my ankles and lifted my whole body upside down and parallel to his to eat my ass and pussy, then change to fucking both of my holes while holding me still with his firm grip on me. Just the top of my back, neck and head was laying on the bed.

He did that over and over, for about half hour, without flinching!

He did flip me around like a rag doll!

Ahhhhh!

What a man! lol

-- Modified on 9/13/2008 4:37:34 PM

I always give my age (66) and say "I am clean, of course D & D free, non smoker and (if you're interested) have all my teeth and hair". But, you have lost weight and are doing serious lifting so you are clearly proud of what you have done (and have every right to be) so brag about it a little. (Though it is ironic that you --the king of great pictures-- doesn't get to send a picture of your newly fine figure.)

-- Modified on 9/13/2008 4:41:50 PM

-- Modified on 9/13/2008 4:42:34 PM

Is such a turn off for me when a guy add:

"I have all my teeth and hair"

to his description.

Please, don't!

Would you like us to say that when we are describing ourselves to you?

eeeek!

-- Modified on 9/13/2008 4:45:37 PM

she only weighed about 100-110 so I would hold by her hips up side down while we 69'd. She loved it. Damn I gotta go find someone who wants to play.

OFF

has never affected my 'participation.'

My ego appreciates a good stroking as much as any guy I guess but there IS one body part that I greatly appreciate having stroked and needs to be firm.

At 67, many of my friends and other men my age are bald (and often do the comb over) and/or have dental plates.  This seems to be a big thing to women we might see socially, so we have gotten in the habit. It isn't right probably and I should stop, but when I think of the ladies I have seen: three of my four favorites are in no ways classically beautiful or even very pretty (one is 62, one is in her late forties and a BBW, one is an African American lady and no where near classical pretty or beautiful, and one is very attractive. My current civie obsession is a tall lovely Jamaican lady who worries because she has a cute (not flat) tummy and a beautiful "too large" behind. What is most appealing about a lady is not --in the end (no pun)-- her looks; yet most ladies advertise their looks because that is important to potential clients or civie dates. I guess none of us is confident enough not to advertise the superficial, but with providers I should certainly know better.

You won't have to change to monograms on the towels!

To me you sound like a great big Teddybear

Most of the gentlemen I talk to don't offer a discription of themselves and I seldom ask. I am more interested in if they are affectionate or not. Just by your asking this question tells me that you are a very honest person who wants the lady you see to know who you exactly are.

I like your screen name and think it's very cute. It says something about your sense of humor

Kisses Haley

Thank you.

That is also funny ... prior to joining p411 a few years ago, there was a provider I often used as a reference.

As I was going on a rare out of town trip, I made arrangement to see a lady while I was away and used my provider friend as a reference.  

Out of curiousity, I asked the lady I was seeing how my friend had described me and she told me she said, "He is like a big old teddy bear."

Maybe that is what I should change my username to. It does seem a little more pleasant.

OFF

I give height, weight and age.

But, I was just too nice to say anything.

xo lisa

-- Modified on 9/14/2008 7:42:38 PM

Truly, I looooooove what I do for living.

Money is not everything for me and, if I cannot have a good physical connection with a client, I would not see him again, even if his wallet is really fat.

I also turn down guys I don't think we will have a good time, based on their reviews or on what they are looking for.

Having amazing sex and being paid for it is the ultimate thrill for me, is what keeps me from feeling jaded or getting too hard like some of the girls get.

The day I start to fuck just because I need the money, is the day I will return to work 9 to 5, because being a provider is not longer exciting for me.

BDG

Your post is heartening because it says that if you see me, especially for a repeat, you actually enjoyed my company.  This is what most of us hope for.  Money or no, who wants to see someone who is putting up with your presence for cash? It is the reason most of us are very careful about hygiene and the way we behave when we visit. I would love to hear what characteristics you prefer or tend to refuse if you would feel comfortable telling us.

Keep up the good work!

OFF

stating that they are D and D free.

That is assumed that you are disease free and because you say it is so doesnt mean it is so.

So why bother saying it ?

Additionally, you stating that assumes that sexual activities are likely to occur which I would never go on an appt. with someone that suggests that assumption as it could possibly be a set up.

I am D and D free so able to function as a physician and pose no danger to my patients in case of accident.  I would be shocked, SHOCKED, to think there was any sexual activity implied in my self description.  However, I have been properly chastised.  I do realize how it appears.  Thanks for the advice.