I don't agree. You don't have the emotional attachment of months or years with a provider, even if the experience is intensely intimate. That's what so hard for people to wrap their heads around. And I don't make love to clients even if I'm being really open in the experience.
Sex can be just a physical thing. An emotional attachment of some sort does make it better IMHO. The emotional attachment can of course take many forms.
I happen to disagree on one point with Yasodhara. Making love is something that can occur between a client and provider. Uncommon? I'll grant that. But with a gal that has been a constant for a few years, yes it happens.
There are a number of things at play. There has been a lot of research in to the symbiotic relationship between 'feelings' and the biochemical reactions that either precede, goes along with, or follow them. (By emotions, some people mean things unrelated to biochemistry, but it can be tricky to differentiate.) We do know arousal and sex are involved in hormone generation/release.
A breakdown by a noted doctor has it as:
1) Lust (the craving for sexual gratification), driven by androgens and estrogens;
2) Attraction (or romantic or passionate love),driven by high dopamine and norepinephrine levels and low serotonin;
3) Attachment (the sense of calm, peace, and stability one feels with a long-term partner) driven by the hormones oxytocin and vasopressin.
Personally, I think it is hard to not have emotions involved in sex. It is more the question of what one does with them when they arise. In this realm many will compartmentalize or suppress to the best of their ability, which can cascade to fallout in certain hormone levels going higher or lower.
#3 above is probably the one which will most manifest itself in any long term relationship, not matter if there is an exchange of funds or not.
Usually shorting the envelope.
There is sex, and then there is lovemaking.
P4P is not lovemaking, it is sex. It can and does grow on very rare occasions into lovemaking, but very, very rarely.
If you are getting into this hobby expecting to make love, you are going to be very dissappointed, and you will probably make the providers that you fall in love with miserable as well.
The hobby is about NSA sex, not love. If you are looking for love, join a dating service.
I am sure many of the manginas here will have a different take on the subject, but as usual THEY ARE WRONG!!! lmao
Good points...it is JUST sex and nothing more. I might "appear" to make love to my clients...but I can tell you straight up...I am not. It's the experience they are paying for
If a guy gets too attached I have to detach from him(not see him) and pretty quick smart. I have a private life with someone I do love in it and that's who I make love with. I do not want a client trying to make something out of a business transaction that is not truly there and certainly not wanted.
there was no high dopamine and norepinephrine levels and low serotonin, involved? No oxytocin and vasopressin running around inside you pretty little head???
Please tell me there was at least SOME androgens and estrogens!!! Wasn't there?
Sorry no...I am one of "those" people who can compartmentalize maybe too well. Some even say there is an element of sociopathy involved.
Of course there are some friends I like to see more than others but it has nothing to do with those chemicals and more to do with the interaction itself.
Oh and there are plenty of estrogen...but I reserve that for those I am fully attracted to and engaged with on a level that does not include an envelop.
Not looking for smart ass answer.
Look back in the Chicago Discussion Board history in March and April. I call it A.S.S.F.U.C.K. or the American Society of Sport Fuckers United for Carnal Knowledge. Would you like to start a local chapter in your area? Eventually, this will be bigger than the Elks Club.
Stimulus
GET MARRIED!
and have 'false misconceptions'
i.e. kids
Sex with a woman who loves you, cares about you and has a sense of shared destiny with you is so qualitatively superior at every level that it can be called "lovemaking."
Sex with a woman who secretly hates your guts, wishes you were dead, and thinks you are an inferior subhuman (ala the erstwhile MacDaddy) is called FUCKING.
When you leave, that smile goes away and she's gagging into the toilet; jumping into the shower and yelling "out damn spot."
Most sex in the hobby falls somewhere in between those extremes, depending on a huge number of variables. But within the hobby, I'd say most of it falls a lot closer to fucking than lovemaking; though some minority of it certainly falls closer to lovemaking than fucking.
Human beings were not built with the ability to draw very good distinctions between phony experiences (i.e. movies, appointments with escorts) and real ones; in terms of emotional response. That's why TV advertising space is so expensive -- it's effectiveness is based on this human deficiency.
Just read what ladies like literbike have to say, though.
I am NOT saying that there is never some genuine positive emotion on the escort's end. I'm just saying that whatever the appearances may be, 99.9% likely it is NOT romantic love.
Frankly, even if she TELLS you that she is madly romantically in love with you, you should actively disbelieve unless she says it in conjunction with donating a kidney. 
In a nut shell, if you are emotional you are already fucked up. No one including yourself doesn't know what you are going to do next?
Emotional equals to "your life is fucked" and you have no self control.
You used emotion and lovemaking, so I would say it is important. It would be a different question if you asked about emotion and sex or emotion and wild monkey fucking.
However, IMO, lovemaking has no place in a P4P world. It can be soft slow and tender, or wild and crazy, but I would never characterize it as lovemaking. For me.
The answer is unanswerable as it will be different for everyone. I like to think I have a big heart and would give the shirt off my back to many a person, but when it comes to sex, I generally like it a bit naughty and almost a bit nasty.
Others will want it different.
I can really enjoy myself. I've been with clients whom we felt a great connection and had a great time, but I would not call it lovemaking. And I've been with clients where we just have no chemistry and we are just fucking till the time is up.
Yet at the same time, the same can be said for civie encounters. I have had some great chemistry/connection with some and then absolutely none with another. It all just depends on the 2 people in the room, but DO NOT think you are going to find love in the hobby! Please don't do that!
Love is demanding;
Sex is effortless.
Love is sweet;
Sex is bitter.
Love is sympathetic;
Sex is unfeeling.
Love is essential;
Sex is optional.
Love is dreaming;
Sex is sleepless nights.
Love is needing;
Sex is wanting.
Love is work;
Sex is play.
Love is gaining;
Sex is losing.
Love is forever;
Sex is moment to moment.
Love is sexy;
Sex is lovely.
Love is hectic;
Sex is nirvana.
Love is hell then heaven;
Sex is heaven then hell.
Love shortens your life;
Sex lengthens it.
Love is black and white;
Sex is technicolor.
Love is saving money;
Sex is spending money.
Love is selflessness;
Sex is selfishness.
Love is dependence;
Sex is independence.
Love is commitment;
Sex lacks it.
Love is dinner;
Sex is dessert.
Love is petty arguments;
Sex is agreements.
Love is a cure;
Sex is the disease.
Love is the words;
Sex is the action
Lustfully Yours,
Tori Blake
When with a "provider" I am "fucking". When I was married (she passed away a while ago) I was "making love" to my wife. There is a huge difference IMHO. I have no emotional bond when it comes to being with a "provider". I'm just there to get off and get out.
Was the outcome the same when making love vs. having sex? Like did you feel good after making love to someone vs. after having sex with someone?
