By now, I'm sure everyone is tired of hearing SPs complain about being stood up. Yes, we all know it's 'part of the business' - albeit just about *the* most annoying part of it.
Oftentimes, we arrange an appointment with a new client, and in the process later end up turning down an appointment for the same time with a regular. This makes being stood up doubly annoying and time wasting - we've been stood up, AND we've refused a regular client's appointment request. A lot of posters have then chimed in saying that turning down a request from a regular in favour of a new client is just plain silly, which I agree it can certainly seem to be when you're left sitting there in lingerie for someone who didn't have the decency to call to cancel.
However, I wanted some input from all of you on how you'd feel if the shoe was on the other foot. What if you had taken the time to research a new lady, re-arrange your schedule to see her, book the appointment and get the funds, only to be told at the last minute - 'sorry, but I can't see you. You're new, and a regular just called and asked for your time slot.'
Would you be pissed, or write a bad review, or simply never see attempt to see her again? Or would you be understanding, as has so often been suggested on the boards?
I'm really curious about this issue, and would appreciate your input.
Morgan
but the SP never said so.
I would not be happy about it, but if she explained it honestly and set up a new appointment with me and kept that appointment, then I would be OK with it.
What I hate is never knowing why the person broke off the appointment. I worry that something awful might have happened or that someone is putting out false stuff about me. This has happened to me about three times in the last couple of years and it is a pain.
In all honesty, I do have rejection issues.
I think youve made a very good point, mrfisher, as I would prefer an explaination as well. Although there are times when Ive gotten explainations that are most likely made up excuses, which can be even more annoying. In this case, I would much rather not have an explaination at all if its not going to be the truth.
I usually see one or two "regulars" - my preference but not a hard and fast rule. I can't help but think I might not have met my ATFs when I was a "new" client, if my ATFs had treated me with low priority compared to a "regular". I think "bumping" a new client in favor of a regular is bad business practice and unprofessional: it reflects poor time management skills. But if you do decide you must favor a "regular," as the other client I would rather not know about it. You should tell the "bumped" client some other reason; after all, stuff happens and life throws unexpected things at us which interfere with appointments. Just my 2 cents.
It can't with TER's review format, but it certainly can (and has) happened on boards that allow reviews in threaded format...
-- Modified on 6/15/2006 10:07:07 AM
Had a no-show from a provider, and no explanation. Not a good start to the "hobby".
Cheers.
in advance, no matter if I am a regular or a new client.... longest in advance? I think was 2 and 1/2 months. Would I have been upset if "she canceled?" In that instance, absolutely. But stuff, it do happen.
I have had a cancellation - and delays, do they upset - a little, but I have also had the lady make it up to me.... so I am not upset....
hey, stuff happens. but I do like to schedule in advance so that the lady knows it is 1) gonna happen and 2) I value her time. Once I half-joked that if I was not there, I was probably dead... oh and please notify someone to come and get the body... she, i think, was less than amused... Have I written a review about a cancellation? no... it has never been that much of a bother....
I have also called at the last moment - and gotten an appointment... those are ok too, but I do not expect anything other than a "rush" as I know I probably upset the schedule....
In general as a regular - I get bummed when I cannot see someone... but it is a business and I do "Get it!"
WRT time wasting -
Getting in the room and finding a bait and switch scheme...
Not being what was advertised GFE, but extra for kissing or extra for BBBJ or extra for???
Rush, rush, rush..... the "oh baby, oh baby, I want you, please come.... bye" routine.
So, those are the downers.
I'd always practiced First Come First Served in my business, but some clients were just too important for me to blow off when they'd throw their weight to move up in the work load cue, or demand special status.
It vexed me for some time. You can't blow off the ones you don't know, they may turn out to be your biggest fish ever.
I finally developed a compromise. I set a fee for "bumping", and I'd pass the fee back to the first customer I had to bump. It minimized the number of instances, and ensured clients needed to share the cost they added to my life and others. I got very few complaints about the policy. It was amazing to see how many were willing to reschedule after all, once defining the value of the crisis was put back on them.
Of course, you can't go around giving money to guys you cancel on, but maybe explaining the problem to your regular and explaining your "business rule" that cost of lost business must be spread amongst those who gain by a small additional fee...
I had a sign hanging in my shop for years: "Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part". Most my customers laughed, a few did not. The ones that didn't laugh often turned out to be more effort to keep as clients than they were worth.
b
an Airline. That's a heinously bad business practice by both airlines, AND providers. SHAME on you!
I treat everyone the same. That's like saying, "I'm changing my plans with a friend because my other friend called" -- very rude and disrespectful.
I love regulars, don't get me wrong. However, if someone has gone through the screening process and scheduled an appointment, I view that as disrupting his life if I cancel -- same as if he had done this to me. If a newbie cancels at the last minute without a really good excuse then I'll never book an appointment with him again and will tell another provider the same if she asks for references on him.
Hugs,
ciara
-- Modified on 6/15/2006 11:43:38 AM
for 3 months, and for various reasons(including a busy schedule) the lady didn't accomodate your request as a repeat client.Wouldn't I be justified to ask the lady after that if she'd give some priority to my new request in her albeit long cue line?
I'm not a revolving door. I do this for fun part time. I've never had a problem with scheduling anyone into my calendar. You make it sound like all of us are booking every day and maybe three times a day. You should be more worried about someone cancelling.
Again, it's good business practice not to change plans on someone. Don't you hate it when you take a day off of work, only to have the cable guy not show up or reschedule because he forgot his other customer was more important?
Hugs,
Ciara
1) you died!
2) see reason #1.
lol... I really try not to change plans... but to be honest - in my "business world" I have had things change 20 times or more in a week... I try not to stress about it. I try even more not to think about it... I just change my calendar... and hope I show up at the right meeting with the correct materials at the correct time... imagine me showing up at a 10 AM Business/science meeting - bringing wine and some sexy gifts (gag or otherwise) with me satin underwear on! lol!!!!
The thought is kinda kinky! no?!
I have NEVER been a no-show nor cancelled. With the shoe on the other foot, I had a lady who I had seen many times, who had an assistant, both of whom had my cell phone, and the appointment was made way in advance, cancel me ON ARRIVAL. She was all dressed up and ready to go, but told me face to face that she was feeling "ill." I was sorely pissed and let her know. She fired me, but I had already "fired" her on the spot. I must admit it's been several years, but this was the worst, most brutal cancellation I've ever had.
You gals wonder why we have a "backup plan?"
OK...maybe I am reading into this line...but if not the irony hurts...
What exactly would the "back-up plan" entail exactly?
Having an appointment with another lady set incase the first cancels?
If so how is that not then flaking on the "back-up" lady? Not just flaking...but doing so pre-meditatedly?
If the clients do "double book" to have a back-up just incase...then would that not leave half of all appointments cancelations? and if half of appointments will end in a cancelation then shouldn't the ladies "double book" to cover that? so then half of all clients get cancelled on? but they each had a "back-up" plan...so they can just see the second lady they booked with, who will then either cancel on another client...or was already cancelled on by a client?
Seems to me if clients don't want to be cancelled on then they shouldn't set anything up that would have them cancel on a lady (first or second choice) and if a lady doesn't want a calcelation or no show, she shouldn't do anything that makes her do so to another...
Treat others as you want and that stuff?
Funny though...clients that will only lose some time and the shot at an orgasm will have a "back-up plan" that will cost a lady her earnings...and the client will walk away from it thinking that's fair...guess the spooge is mightier than the bill collector...and one's need to squirt is greater than one's need to pay her bills. *smirk*
The irony of it all...wouldn't the notion of a back-up plan be one of the things that could make a lady inclined to book with a regular over a new client? If she were the back-up she would be the one getting cancelled on? Circular irony...the efforts to prevent are the cause...it's like a Greek tragedy and trying to stop the fate the Oracle foretold actually causing it to come to pass...
Oh, and if I am wrong about what you meant by a "back up plan", I am sorry, and then this post isn't directed at anything written in yours...but if I am mistaken on the meaning of "back up plan" could you please clarify what you did mean by that, so I will know in the future to not assume it means what I have read it does in the past?
Thanks.
is to have a the number of an agency, from which I would be willing to see anyone available progammed on my cell phone.
The "back-up plan" was nothing more than the phone number of another lady I had previously seen. No double booking. Just someone to call if available and something to do if the first lady flaked. BTW the other lady was not available so I had a four hour round trip drive for nothing and also the waste of a blue pill. Laugh a little folks.
-- Modified on 6/15/2006 4:11:58 PM
I'm sure the lady in question that you ended up seeing would love to hear you say such a thing. Shame on you! You're spending too much time with the "group."
Geeze, read my reply. I didn't get to see anyone. How much clearer can it be? Phone number only, no availability, four hours round trip for nada. No double booking, no screwing with anyone's schedule. C'mon, baby, you know me and I've never ever pushed the envelope with you or decieved you.
-- Modified on 6/15/2006 9:10:29 PM
It would probably hurt her feelings.
I believe he said that his "Back up" lady was not available...so that is why it was a wasted four drive and un-utilised Blue Pill...not because his "back up" lady wasn't worth it or not good...but because he wasn't able to see her either.
It seems he needed a a "Further back" up. *grin*
I reiterate, I did not double book, I simply had another phone number just in case. Prudent. And yes, the other lady does read and post on this board and was clear when I called that it was an unusual circumstance. She responded to me graciously not with resentment but regret that she couldn't help me out. The original intent of this thread was how we react to cancellations. I gave my opinion. You, of all people, know that I have never disabused you nor failed to show. You also know that I have only a very few ladies that I adore, you among them. So the term "backup" was not the best description. Perhaps plan "B" regarding what might I do after weeks of planning, anticipation, long round trip drive if the session doesn't happen is a more approptiate interogatory. Kisses to your babies.
A lot of the time it seems when a "back up" is mentioned it is literally a second booked appoinment that will be cancelled if the first appointment works out...glad to know you don't play that game. 
Like I said if that wasn't what you were talking about then my post wasn't to your situation.
Because quite a few guys really do take advantage of us in the valley of the sun. Now those that are sweet and caring, you know who you are, so if it doesn't apply to you then don't worry about it.
Hugs,
ciara
I can't even seem to get the first plan right! lol! you guys always amaze me... back up plan... next thing ya know, you'll be tellin me you can find providers on the internet!
The more I read over these posts in the topic, I kinda get p!$$ed off. It seems we are ALL whinning. (me included) We all need to to let off steam. Most of the time I try to hold my tongue as I am very opinionated, I will respect that other's opinions may differ, but this is getting my goat.
[turn on mad rant warning]
I have had only one no show (see above post) and it felt worse than any rejection a tubby kid can have in high school ( AND THAT IS PRETTY DAMN LOW). Damn, even my wife has never made me feel as bad as that __ __ SP. It seems this business has gotten more competitive. More Sp and larger range of clients. It isn't like you have a fruit stand on the corner, and we stop by on the way to the kids ballgame. The reality of it is, (at least in my case) I am taking time off from work by either vacation day or working some of the off shifts so I dont short change my employer. Forntunately, my position allows me this flexibility. Plus, how many clients are MARRIED and making every effort to keep this off the radar. And you want to whine because, based on our experience, we have found we need to have a "back up plan"???? Why dont you go find a brick wall and beat your head against it until you knock some sense in there!
I am glad the ladies I have seen (1 exception) Have been very decent to me. I always let them know well ahaed of time of changes. I called the 2 times I was late (which I was flamed at in another topic because I called, WTF is the problem??) because that is the decent thing to do.
[breathes in and out slowly]
OK, im better now. I cannot speak to others, but since that trip to hell, I will make my appointment with the lady I want to. B/c of my schedule, I have to do this at least several days in advance. My backup plan is this::::: The agency I first used, I will call and say I have business in town on day X, who might be on schedule and if I can make time, how much lead time do you need if I wanted a last minute appointment? Usually at least one would be availble with a 2 hour notice. As I have used them and still see some as my intended SP, they usually will try to help. (Thx H!)
If you want to whine about that, there are plenty of other SP's out here that I'd be glad to share my hard earned money with...
I think that it should be on a "first come,first served" basis.However,I think that,if it were me,I'd be willing to accomodate a provider by giving up my time slot in exchange for say a half-price session with all the trimmings! That is unless I absolutely couldn't give up my time slot due to my schedule at that time.I say,make him an offer of a 50% discount if he gives up the time slot or just let him keep his original appt. for the full price.
I don't believe I've been placed in this situation, but if I were, it would depend upon the situation and those involved.
If a regular gentleman client who lived out of town was going to be here for business and wanted the same date as a new client who lived in my area, I might see if I could juggle my schedule a bit if there was proper notice -- I wouldn't call an hour ahead and cancel, I would contact him in a proper timeframe to discuss rescheduling. I would be especially sensitive to his scheduling needs and try to fit him in even if that meant juggling my own personal schedule. I would try to make it a win-win situation for everyone.
Let's take off our personal feelings hats and put on our business hats. Which is more important, business owners: Retaining excellent clients or obtaining new clients? It's not exactly like canceling one friend to see another because it is a business, too. If done properly and with the most respect, everyone can come through the situation without scars.
Kate Bishop
-- Modified on 6/15/2006 11:59:00 AM
and that's a thoughtful approach if you have the time to reschedule. However, to me canceling on a friend should have the same respect as canceling on a new client. But if you have the time and everyone agrees, then so be it. And from a marketing standpoint, a new client can be just as good as a regular (albeit the latter needs a lot of massaging).
Hugs,
Ciara
And I try to approach this as a business as well.
This is the policy (which is pretty standard in the business world), I use with everyone. I thought it was fair for me and my clients.
Holding Your Reservation:
You can hold you appointment by inputting your credit card information when booking. This guarantees your time slot. Your credit card will not be charged, and at your appointment you may pay for your appointment with credit card, cash or money order. Your credit card info is NOT required to book an appointment with me.
Confirming Your Reservation:
Confirmations the day of appointment must be received at least 45 minutes prior to appointment time otherwise it is considered a cancellation. Those whose who confirm their appointment with a credit card have up 5 minutes after the scheduled appointment time to confirm without penalty. Confirmations can be made either via phone ( a voice message is okay), or e-mail. (Side note, if someone wants a time slot I am not available, but there has been no confirmation yet, I have a daily cancellation list. In case a gentleman cancels, I call another to accommodate his reservation request.)
Cancellation Policy:
You can cancel incall appointments at least 1 hour prior to start time and 90 minutes for outcall appointments in the local DC area. If the outcall appointment is outside of the DC Metro Area, the appointment cancellation time is travel time from DC plus 30 minutes. For appointments which require major travel (more than 2 hours driving or a flight), the cancellation period is 4 days before appointment for a full refund of your deposit, 2 days for a 50% refund of your deposit, and 1 day notice for a 25% refund. Anything less than 1 day (24hours), constitutes you forfeiting any and all deposits made.
Cancellations made with less than an hour to reservation start time will incur a $50 cancellation fee for incall appointments and $60 for outcall appointments. Cancellation fees can be forwarded to future appointment times if the appointment is rescheduled within the next 48 hours.
If you are going to be late, you can call and push back your appointment time upto 20 minutes. However, if you are later than that, the appointment starts 20 minutes past the original start time, regardless of when you arrive.
For those who commit "No Call and No Show" cancellations pre-booking is no longer available. He/She will have to call on the same day as they would like to schedule to check my availability.
For those who guarantee reservation times with a credit card, if I cancel with less than a hour to our appointment start time, you will receive a $50 credit toward your next session.
I don't see any problem with a SP having 2 requests for a visit, 1 from a regular, 1 from someone she doesn't know, choosing to respond to the regular.
I also have np problem with a SP "re-arranging" her schedule, with at least 24 hours notice to accomodate a regular.
The problem is when there is the last minute cancellation!!! Whether it be a call a couple of hours before the visit, or not answering the 2nd call of the 2-call system, it is easy to assume the worst of the SP!!!
-- Modified on 6/15/2006 2:50:59 PM
but I hope you have a really good reason and don't tell the person, "Sorry, but my regular takes precedence over you."
Hugs,
Ciara
I don't have any problem with a lady contacting me in advance of a scheduled appointment to say, "Can we reschedule? I've had something come up." I'd like to know how serious of a reschedule she's talking about, and it would also help to know how firm she's being about cancelling my original appointment.
It's one thing if she says, "A regular of mine would like to see me at 1:15 next Tuesday, and your appointment was scheduled to end at 1:30; can we move your time up some so I can make this fit?" I'll check my schedule, and if I've got an hour's flexibility, I'll happily make the change. I see keeping her happy as a definite investment in my own experience, so if there's any way to make it happen, it's in both our interest to do so. (I'm making up the times here -- I don't know if any ladies would ever schedule appointments with only 45 minutes in between, and it's not really germane to the point.)
If she calls me and says, "I can't make our scheduled time because I'm going to be at a doctor's appointment with my sick child; will tomorrow work for you?", then obviously, I'm going to accede to her wishes about cancelling, but I may or may not be able to handle the next day. We may have to just reschedule for "Time TBA".
If she calls me and says, "I've just gotten a request for a six-hour date that overlaps your appointment, and I really need to reschedule you"... I'd understand if she flat-out canceled my appointment if I couldn't come up with a different time, but I'd be pretty disappointed, especially if it was on very short notice.
First come, first served! But you sound like time and money are to be factored into the equation of who should be scheduled first. If you said that you could not see me because a regular had called to take my time slot I would be angry and just not see you. There are many other ladies who honor their appointment times!
-- Modified on 6/15/2006 1:25:20 PM
-- Modified on 6/15/2006 2:10:49 PM
There is no perfect science in who is going to be good and who is not.
It would piss me off if a woman would let me believe that we were going to meet and never show or cancel at the last minute.
Would I try to see her again? Maybe or maybe not. I would guess it depends on if she is someone I wanted to see or not.
Now with that said, if I make an appointment I make it.
I hate to say it, but all professionals go through this. Doctors, lawyers, accountants, etc... how many missed appointments do you think they get a day? It is money out of thier pockets too. What do you think thier policy about seeing someone again is? Yep... for most, it is come back on in! for the best, the ones who have too much business it is, see ya!
So either choose to churn and burn through the no shows and understand that you may lose business down the line.
Here is another point of view...
A direction that few take is the place of self-responsibility. Who are you being in respect to time that they don't value your time?
Are you someone who is being powerful around time? Do you project that time is a serious thing? Do you respect time? yours and others?
If people percive your commitment to time they are ofen more likely to be more committed themselves.
Just a thought.
If a weekender or something else comes up that is lucrative or fun for them, and you are not destroyed by having your hour cancelled, be a good guy and let them reschedule you. The key obviously is to give you enough warning to institute plan B. Sometimes they will implement a plan B that is better than you could work out.
If something comes up (illness, personal problem, etc.), that's one thing. But to cancel to take an appointment from some other guy for whatever reason--regular vs new guy, multi-hour vs 1 hr, or whatever--and I find out, I'll move on. Many fish in the sea.
I just go with the flow... if it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen. I have also had wonderful on the spur of the moment things happen as well. Guess I have been lucky... and although I have been stood up.... that was "made up to me!" big time. so I have no complaints. As Scarlett was fond of saying "tomorrow is another day"! beat that!
I have had two well known providers be no shows....well not really no shows but call upon call to delay and then finally a call to tell me the truth. Very annoying but in one instance where I felt I was being told the truth my attitude was "it is called life". As it happened the provider at another time and place called me and invited me to dinner to "apologize" for the problem. Totally not necessary but very much appreciated.
In the other case I felt taken advantage of. I have tried to re-book with this provide in Vegas and cannot even get a response to an email. Maybe she is embarassed or maybe it is something else.....who knows and I probably don't care. It is always easier just to tell someone what is going on.....they may not like what you are telling them but they will respect you for being honest.
I had a very unsettling No Show last month. The worst part was not knowing why. I had been exchanging calls and emails with her for about a month as we tried to match schedules. We had a date set. I spoke with her one more time b4 the big day. She lives in a larger city about 1½ hour drive away. So I started out that morning. I encountered traffic and called to let her know that it could effect my arrival time. I got her VM. When I got to the incall location, her directions were to call and get an entry code for the gate. I called and left another Vm and waited. I know her schedule is busy and thought she was just behind. After 15 minutes, my newbie paranoia (sp?) set in and I deciced to move to another locale and call. Left VM. this went on for about 30-40 minutes. I called twice more and left VM's. The last place I was parked at, I had my laptop with me and tried to catch up on work. The next time I looked up there was a local policeman staring at me. I almost had a heart attaack! I threw my laptop down and waved at him. Drove off and he followed for about 5 minutes. Called one last time and left a VM. Finally went home and found my wife doing her "Godzilla destroys Tokyo" routine (It was a VERY BAD DAY) 
The worst part was not knowing what happened. I had automatically assumed I had done something wrong. It was about 8 days later and after I posted about it here that I got an email from her. There was a medical emergency. OK, I can accpet that, but no offer to re-schedule/anything. NOt even an "I'm sorry your day sucked" was given.
As far as the general scheduling problem, I think that whomever called and requested 1 PM should get that time. That person shouldn't be bumped just for another client. I know emergencies happen. Everyone has "real life" events that cannot be predicted. The flip side of the coin is I know that a regular may be leaving town at 2:30 and had to see her at 1. If the SP wanted to keep the regular happy and not tick off a new client. She should ask (and if she screened she should be able to make an educated guess to how a new client may react) ask the new client if they could reschedule, offering dicount/extra time depending on what the new time would be. If the new client that called and got an appointment first can't or won't change his time, she should see him. (He did after all have the appointment first!)
These are just my opinions. Hope it helps 
Months later she sent me a very humble apology, and gave me an explanation. I accepted both, but I haven't had a session with her.
At the time, I have to say, it hurts a little worse than usual when you're paying for her time and then you get the standup.
