I agree, the term BDSM covers a variety, and I quickly realized what I wanted to try was the sensual dominant, not someone into inflicting pain, scat, blood, or some of the non-pleasurable aspect. Got referred to an under the radar provider who does not like/allow reviews (but had a high quality referral source whom I trusted), and set up first appointment. She greeted me - in a sexy leather outfit, whip in hand, very friendly, personable, intelligent...spent a few minutes talking about what she might do, what I might like, then she launched the session and ordered me to address her further as Godess, and instructed me to disrobe. Then she had me stand naked, while she walked around, "inspecting me", and gently stroking parts of my body, using her whip to gently lift and inspect my cock and balls..definitely a turn-on so far; She then blindfolded me with a light scarf like blindfold that was not too large or heavy and that I could somewhat see thru, and gently pushed me down, asked me to kiss her body all over from toes to head, without missing a spot. I complied, not missing any spots, and by the time I got to her upper thighs, realized that somehow in the course of blindfolding me, she also had stripped, so of course I kissed her pussy lips, ass and every other spot on up to her head top. I was definitely turned on, and she made observations about my obvious arousal. She then guided me by the hand over to a bed, had me lay down, then used some soft cuffs to tie my hands to the headpost, and each leg by the ankle to the footpost. She then proclaimed that she would be putting different parts of her body to my lips, and I was to french kiss whatever she placed there. She begin with a breast, then the other --which I obviously enjoyed, then some fingers, then she turned around and placed her ass on my face...I of course complied, and got to enjoy my first rimming experience, and as i did so, I could feel her pussy juices driping on my neck; while I did this, she periodicaly would play with my cock with the tip of her whip - just enought to keep me aroused and desperately wanting to use my tool and have her touch it more, but she knew when to stop at the point that seemed to tease me the most; she gradually slid her body so that I was performing DATy rather than rimming, and stayed there until she came, taking care in the process to thoroughly drench my face neck and chest with pussy juices. She then relaxed, climbed off me and laid beside me with her feet by my head - next thing I knew, her big toe penetrated my liops and she has me thouroughly suck each toe on each foot. Like rimming, it was something I'd never done before, but she had me so aroused and under her sensual spell (plus tied up so that I knew I had to please her in hopes of eventual relief for me). After that, she climbed atop me again, but uncuffed my hands and instructed me to massage her back - she turned toa reverse cowgirl position, and as I massage her, she began a very slow teasing pussy lip glide up and down my cock, while using one hand to firmly, but not painfuly grab my ball sack. She told me not to cum until she said so, but that didn't last long, and I let he know I could not hold back any further (which I think she intended to be the case), and she quickly shifted from pussylip slide to a hand job that quickly gave me a tremendous relief. The was no FS ending, but the relief was as pleasurable as any i've ever experienced. I've since seen her a few more times and further explored this world, and although she is more expensive than most others, its definitely an experience worth exploring if you can find the right person.
