My ATF who I have seen for several years has gained weight steadily over the last couple. I still enjoy seeing her and like her personally. I really don't want to say anything and hurt her feelings. I was wondering how others would handle.
If you still enjoy seeing her then what's the problem ? If she is becoming unnatractive to you then simply stop seeing her. It's not your place to talk to her about her weight and I guarantee that won't go over well.....
I would never tell her that. She does ask about how she looks since I have seen her for years. There is more to this then just looks. I also get a lot of texts/phone calls from her when times are slow and I always try to see her, but I imagine her business is slowing down cause of her weight gain
I don't do fat, unless I was in actual love with her, in which case I'd suggest a mutual gym membership and a change in dining habits, hoping she would get the hint. Anything less than outright love, I would simply stop seeing her until and unless she became sexually attractive to me again.
I have had to flat out tell chicas in Costa Rica that I was no longer interested in them for either age or weight reasons, but that's in a much different environment where they come up to you in person and ask why you won't fuck them any more. I found there is no substitute for the truth in those cases, but some women take that kind of news better than others. NO ONE likes to be rejected and even an asshole like me doesn't enjoy flat out telling some vaca "you are too fat for me" but yes, I have been pushed into it before.
There is a certain denial period where once skinny people start to gain weight, but convince themselves "I don't look so bad, I still look better than...."
It's tough to tell someone they are starting to let themselves go. I really wish there were a tactful way to say it, but so far I haven't found one.
It is a bit ironic, you can tell a skinny person "girl, you are wasting away to nothing, you need to eat more", but try telling a fat broad "Girl, you need to lay off the bon bons" and see where it gets you.
let's be honest here. If society did indeed favor the fat, fat broads everywhere would be raking it in, and not just in this industry. It's actually far more culturally acceptable to shame fat people into losing weight (there's no program, outside of a rehabilitation center, focused on selling weight gaining products to women because they're too thin, but the weight-loss industry is literally a billion-dollar one).
Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, and all the other weight loss programs have no counterparts for thin women.
Either way, it's not anyone's business to suggest how another human being should or shouldnt be taking care of themselves.
Oh- and lets not ever forget that only women can "let themselves go". That is not something that's applicable to the other gender in the least.
This board is full of men who have "let themselves go" I work hard to make sure I don't join their ranks.
The number of women (and men) who are overweight is many times the number of "people" who are underweight in this country, and you still did not address my point that calling someone "fat" is considered an insult and hugely frowned upon, but call a bulimic woman, or an underweight man who despite eating like a horse and spending hours in the gym, simply can't gain weight. Calling them skinny seems to be perfectly acceptable. I am not complaining about the double standard, but it's not something you can deny. You do seem quite capable of "deflecting" but I don't see a denial.
Men can and do "let themselves go"...I did...I hold only myself responsible for the condition I found myself in...
I just lost 140 pounds this past year after I let them remove most if my stomach...I still have another 80 pounds to go to get to my ultimate goal of 180...
Fat shaming of men does occur...I've been the victim of it for years and it served to steel my resolve to better my situation...
Oh for sure; I get that totally. But I'm not talking about individual cases here. I'm talking intrinsic societal stigma. Men are of course susceptible to this, but the context is different.
Fat is a pejorative because it's societally deemed as one; being called thin or Underweight is a goal; it's positive. That's why it's so negative to call someone fat, because that word is stacked with negative connotations like being lazy, dumb, and unworthy.
Some fat broads like myself have decided to reclaim "fat" as what it is; a descriptor.
I think that as a fat person I have a different criteria for who qualifies as a "fat person"... I'm not sure what an " SJW" is but having seen the pics on your website I would not consider you in the same league as I was in...
But I also would not want to be a female with weight issues in this culture...being male is bad enough...
Their businesss dries up this time of year as does there 3 month supply of Ben and Jerrys. LOL
They are also dealing with the dreaded 10 pound annual weight gain from the holidays.
Take heart. Bikini season is only 4 months away. If she is still a disaster in May, give her her walking papers (or jogging papers, in her case. Lol) and move on to your next ATF.
Shit, many of the manginas here have four or five of them. LOL
For BBBBB this is a huge step forward in writing coherently. I actually give her kudos for the vast improvement over her usual unintelligible gibberish.
or even better - become more wiser and developed basic human basic qualities,such as kindness and ability to listen positively?
What is interesting .. that for all my 10 + years in states ONLY low life red necks who never make it out of own county - only those were SOOOOO unhappy with my sexy accent and some how JUST were not able to understand my English when .. let me think, when i was trying to make a conversation about Fantasies and Crises of Egon Schille ..
The rest of intelligent and well traveled americans never have had any problems with my English.. So in any case.. I am so happy for you - seems, headaches are gone for some one Wink wink always ready to entertain, my time does not cost money.. yet I am myself worth a lot Happy new year
Don't EVER bring up a woman's weight. Most females are insecure about weight/body issues so a single comment will haunt you for years. It really sucks to put someone you like on ignore because of some insecurity-fueled rage against you. Do yourself a favor and just don't say anything! Stop seeing her if it's an issue, but keep silent.
Posted By: Assman33
My ATF who I have seen for several years has gained weight stop eadily over the last couple. I still enjoy seeing her and like her personally. I really don't want to say anything and hurt her feelings. I was wondering how others would handle.
I've had two ATFs. One was an AMP K-girl who I connected with the very first time I met her even tho' she had terrible teeth (great bod, bad teeth). I and others convinced her to spend her money on dental work and not on fake boobs. She was a mind-reader and each time (I lost count, maybe 40 or more dates) was pure bliss. She started to gain weight before she retired but it didn't matter to me. She is now retired and I would have to guess that she has plumped up even more but I don't think I would care if I could just lay there with her again.
My other ATF was an upscale K-girl who, also, could make me melt with the whole experience. Same deal ... she has retired but if I could get my arms around her again I wouldn't mind if I had to reach a little further to do so
Just a little more to work with and I don't see the issue at all.
Posted By: Assman33
My ATF who I have seen for several years has gained weight steadily over the last couple. I still enjoy seeing her and like her personally. I really don't want to say anything and hurt her feelings. I was wondering how others would handle.
You didn't sign up for an overweight lady. Her business will suffer and so will service, along the way, like dominos. Most would agree, let her know. Coming from a regularist in her circle, she's going to appreciate the honesty. Many weight loss clinics with amazing results, supervised meds,etc.- So, to sum it up, let her know, before she becomes more of a mercy than a pleasure for you. Happy New Year.
Maybe she fit the description of you then but if she doesn't then there should be an understanding ... Now if you guys have great chemistry & her personality is great I say stick with her because that can be hard to come by.
Maybe she fit the description of you then but if she doesn't then there should be an understanding ... Now if you guys have great chemistry & her personality is great I say stick with her because that can be hard to come by.
Never comment on their age or weight. Period. If you're not attracted to her, stop seeing her. It is your money. Choose to spend it as you will. As some other posts have commented, in the end, this is a business arrangement. If you still enjoy seeing her for other intangibles i.e. personality, etc. then continue. It is not like you are dating, married, etc. You don't owe it to her to see her. My two cents.
Posted By: Assman33
My ATF who I have seen for several years has gained weight steadily over the last couple. I still enjoy seeing her and like her personally. I really don't want to say anything and hurt her feelings. I was wondering how others would handle.
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