No matter how many times I see my ATF, I feel comfortable and satisfied before and after.

BUT, it's all in vain or emptyness AFTER I was with a new friend even though I had a great time.

Welcome any inputs. Thanks.

But it sounds to me like you enjoy being with your ATF and you are comparing other girls to her. This is understandable as I do  the same thing quite often.

No easy answer to this.  If other women leave you feeling like you are wasting your time and money then simply stick to your ATF.  If, on the other hand, you can enjoy the moment with a new lady and not feel any buyers remorse then go ahead and soread the good times a bit.  Only you can decide what works for you.

to both civie and P4P relationships. The parameters of the two differ extremely. Two major differences that come to mind are emotional and phsycological support(I hope I'm not speaking out of turn here). Your ATF may not be geared to offer that type of support.For that matter,your civie friend may not either. I guess it all comes down to your priorities within a 'friendship'. I choose not to have civie GF's. While also being scared shitless to declare a favorite provider my ATF. I have done so in the past only to be disappointed later-on.We're back to 'Priorities'.

Sometimes for reasons of personality or chemistry, it just doesn't click.

Nothing to get upset about, it's just the way life is.

the date was worthwhile.

I never go into a date expecting "chemistry", but I always go in with a high level of interest in the lady du jour. I enjoy meeting ladies in this biz in and of itself, in addition to, other things '

When "chemistry" happens, it's a plus. The lady goes on my visit again list. If it continues to happen she becomes a regular.

But I never feel unsatisfied, or that it was a waste of time to spend a pleasant hour or two with a pretty lady....

That's why she is your "ATF". That kind of connection may be rare in life let alone in the context of the hobby.

sounds like you are seeking some emotional chemistry, and not just physical chemistry if you can have a good time and yet still feel empty.

probably with an ATF you have a feeling she "knows you" or something like that so it fills up the emotional component and that feeling does not exist after a good physical experience with a new friend.

In a psychobabble world it probably has to do with "attachment."  You feel some attachment with the ATF that meets the emotional want and you don't have that with a new friend, at least not first time around.

And attachment does not have to mean "help me I am falling in love with my ATF."

sorry, but I don't compare with them.
If I compared with them, why would I say "emptyness"?

Based on several comments, I agree to "emotional chemistry".

I don't mean it's love (well, personally I don't believe in "LOVE" b/w a guy and a gal, needless to say first sight love).

I guess the level of emotional chemistry gradually goes down after I saw ATF. That's why I would not feel empty. It may last for a couple of days. And at certain point, I see her again to recharge it.

But, in another case I guess it's just only for fun.

Anyway, I appreciate sharing your comments.

-- Modified on 8/26/2009 4:08:22 PM

Welcome to normalcy.  I think you can be with the most technically skilled provider in the world and love every second of it, and still feel it to be a hollow when all said and done.  

There is a reason most people gravitate to a relationship, right?  I would guess you have some degree of a relationship with your ATF, so it does not seem as hollow.  

I myself do not understand why some avoid a civi relatiohship.  I think there are things that a physical service can not replace.  You may just be a normal person and your ATF taps into your emotions in a way.  That makes the hobby less hollow for you I think.

Just my guesses and thoughts.