And what tells you that the hooker you're about to pay actually cares about any of this?

is when she opens wide and I insert my sausage inside of any one of her orifices.  

How can you tell? It's in her kiss, the way it gets deeper...sensual...lingering. If this doesn't ring a bell for you, then I suppose you probably haven't gotten there yet. And if it turns out that she's simply that good of an actress? Well, that's what I paid for - I can suspend my disbelief.

For the most part, the "connection" (or lack thereof) is an excuse used by civvie women, and really means "he's too ugly", "he's not exciting enough", etc.  So feeling a "connection" is not a priority for me when seeing a provider.  With that said, there are still human factors to be reckoned with; after all, the hobby is about *people*.  So there'll always be an issue of sexual compatibility.  Having it can make an appointment more enjoyable, and is likely the reason why hobbyists return.

-- Modified on 7/8/2015 11:37:10 AM

As you well know, many dudes here want the gal gazing into his eye, kissing like long lost lovers, etc but want that "connection" to remain after the date through emails, texts, etc.

A willingness to negotiate. lol

That was a given. I didn't think I had to mention it in every post.

Not the one hour first meetings....but those special multi-hour dates are always negotiated.

I'm a lot like you.  I don't mistake GFE actions for indicators of romantic interest.  It's strictly her way of giving good service and maybe showing her comfort level with me.  I don't think it's reasonable for me to expect her to treat me like a long-lost lover.  Maybe like a friend with benefits, but I draw the line there.  My idea of a connection is saying hello at the M&G's and maybe an occasional "come up and see me sometime" e-mail.  (Although the latter can become a problem if I find a civvie girlfriend.)

-- Modified on 7/8/2015 12:08:14 PM

Meeting new people is always a great thing, but meeting them and having the connection is better that way you have that bursting desire to get downn and dirty with one another and continue to do it in the future.

neither of those will sleep with a bum, financially insecure person. An escort just be more quick to adjust to your personality, since she services you. A civvie can be real borring telling you love stories from the movies. From what I see, you need a relationship with a hooker.

I can totally understand what you mean, but the problem with the word "connection" is that it's become watered down through misuse in the civvie dating world.  Far too often, it's a code word for "he's too ugly" or "he's not exciting enough", or conversely, "her breasts are too small".  So some people develop a knee-jerk aversion to it.  While the hobby has little in common with dating (or maybe more than we like to think), language affects thought pervasively, including our preferences in who we choose to see.

It takes a lot of time and money; and it is hard to at first see and quantify.  As others have said, it is mostly in her kisses, and I have to totally agree with that.  

If I just wanted sex I would still be picking up streetwalkers on Kuhio.
However I agree with Jack and GaG on connection. Even if she's acting, I want to feel like for that hour or two that she actually is happy to be with me, and she is having fun too. I definitely want the girlfriend experience, but I'm not looking for a girlfriend.

I don't really know what each person means by "connection," but I prefer dates starting at 2 hours.  That means that in addition to sex, there will be talking, because as the song goes "I ain't the man I once was."  Lol!    When my big head is thinking "oh shit, this lady has no clue what I am talking about" or I if lose interest in what she has to say, I know there is no connection, not for me.   As long as that does not carry over into the physical activities, I am fine with it, but I can't say that those are my best times, I like to enjoy the entire experience of being with someone else.

There are reatail and wholesale prices. When you book multi-hour you are buying wholesale. When did you last time make multi-hour appointment?

I guess you are suggesting that when a gal posts a multi-hour rate that is a version of wholesale.  Not really the case as it is still a much higher rate than guys who get what this is about would ever pay.

Maybe you are right. Maybe I do need a relationship with a hooker. What good are all these civie women anyway?

Most of them exist only for turnaround of cash flow. There are gems, indeed, but very scarce. Well, we need to know your location, after that to buy a plane ticket to visit me. How else?

Connection for her?  When they get $$$$$$$$$$$$$

Jack doesn't pay for plane tickets. LOL

Dear Melissa:
I was just wondering if you had to developed an apparatus for compatibility what would it be? Also what type of methods would you use to determine compatibility prior to seeing a client and during the session? Is there anything specific that you would ask during the getting to know you phase of the session?

Elena when embarking on the subject of negotiating, the question is that the provider has a floor and the hobbyist has a ceiling.  What types of barter and exchange would you consider from a client who is interested in seeing you?  Also would you also offer wholesale prices to those who would like to buy sessions in bulk?  If so how do you arrange your schedule and how would you accept payment so that it is ammenable to all parties involved?

First of all, good escort structures her fees already with discount in mind. Let's say an hour is $500, then two hours is $900, three hours is $1300. If a guy wants to buy something that costs $500 for $200, he's better get lost. Let's say one poor person accumulated $400 while I charge $500 ( I charge $400 BTW) and says that he wants to meet me, but only has $400.
I'll accept such appointment because person honestly explained to me his situation.

I feel the same way. There has to be something and in the guys I see regularly, there is in every one of them, some personality trait that I enjoy. Yes I fake a lot of the the stuff BUT, to put it as you so eloquently did.....I do not want to suffer through the entire time, emphasis on the suffer.

Elena, what I was saying was with compensation would you accept payment in bulk say on the first of each month if he had a monthly arrangement or if you trusted the person on the 1st and the 15th of the month?  Not that it had anything to do with bank runs but how you would accept your compensation.

I personally don't give a F*CK what they want to do. What I know is that my rate is reasonable ( + trips to Greece) without surcharge, that I am good and fun person and that I have good feedback. That is enough for me to stay where I am. There are people who think that sex should be free at all. But from beginning of civilization it never was free. I do however realize that now it is buyer market, however my word in this market is not the last. Xo

It was times in my life when the person just handed me $5000 for a week in Hamptons with no sex at all. This was fun. He didn't ask me how much I want or anything, just handed me cash in the beggining. And boy, he got some other expences as well: food, lodging, rides on hourses backs, hiking. This was fun. No complain. And he was a nice guy too. Xo

It's the companionship that costs money  

into it's most basic format? I know I do. I like the way you put it.

No one wants an overly attached girlfriend. They want a night of entertainment with a happy ending. It is all about entertainment.

Re: Holy crap! Look who's back! Nice to seeya. eom

+1..

…know how to find that something that they like about you because they are comfortable in their own skin and like what they do. (They realize that we’re all human and fulfilling human needs is a natural act; no shame.) As a client, learn how to pick up the signs and go with the flow and stop being so full of doubt, so full of insecurity; in the long run you’re wasting you life focusing on what does not make life worth living.

The things I find unattractive. I have the unfortunate trait of being very visual and visual matters to me 100%. It can make or break whether I am aroused of not. Not something I can change or even want to.

Mine goes a little differently. I am the creative type, and I think a lot. I love cracking jokes, teasing the guy, being his friend, and entertaining. And then doing whatever I can to surprise him with certain skills.

I crack up when I see a hooker who bloviates that she's actually a "therapist"  LOL