As a guy who tries to be a painless trick, I can say... this is never an issue (OK, almost never... early on I screwed up once but that was due to inexperience), and I sure as hell don't want it to be. There are lots of ways I can enjoy my hour on the clock, and futzing around with a basic issue like the envelope is not one of them. Honestly, how sad is it that we are even having this discussion? You (the provider) are willing to lay out your body for some unknown bloke like me? Guess what, I am grateful enough to not make an issue out of the payment.
I was halfway through an appointment with a client and then he somehow managed to bring up payment and asked me for BBFS. I said no obviously. He said it was not a problem and said he would get the money from his car for payment. He realized his mistake when he brought up payment when he claimed to not have any money on him and said he will get it in a bit. We already went through many services but my gut was telling me to make him pay now. He left my place to pretend to get the money and actually emailed me twice from his car while he sat there 30 minutes into our date to beg for bbfs before he decided to leave. WTF!!!!! I am really at a loss for words since this guy has about 7-8 years worth of lengthy references from nice ladies. Not sure how to deal with this. I recognize I need to count my money upfront which I now have been doing after this man. I hate ruining the mood asking upfront and counting but this seems to be a new necessity once again. Just a bit shocked this happened with such a large amount of ladies giving me a thumbs up on this client. How do you feel about ladies counting money upfront?
count money in front of me. An alternative is to have your client leave his envelope in the washroom. You can check it out in private. Then, as soon as you come out you can exclaim how you're about to fuck his brains out.
If, on the other hand, you're going to count money in my presence then do something sexy like, pulling it out slowly, one bill at the time and whisking each across your face as you stare me down with seductive eyes. Tell me with your eyes just what you're going to do to me. Then do it, or ask me to do you. Either one works for me.
I guess I need to ask the client to leave the funds in my washroom in advance, I suppose. I dislike having to ask for money. I prefer to just screen well because it makes it less awkward. But that didn't seem to help this time. My next client willingly counted it out in front of me when he walked in. I felt very awkward having to do so since that is not my style. It ruins the experience on both ends 
.
He probably had it all the time & was just looking to make a get away. SCAM artists on both sides of the street. Sorry this happened to you.
You should at least see the money before play time, you may choose to not pick it up but many invite their guest to freshen up & you may secure it
I don't care if you count it in front of me. I'm really not into the whole GFE illusion. I'm there for sex. The only illusion I want is that you're not unhappy to see me. Sort of like the smiling cashier at the fast food check out who probably wants to stab my eyes out, but says "Have a good day" instead. It doesn't take much to please me.
It ruins the mood. However, I always put envelope where the provider will easily see it and then take a shower. I give the provider time to check the cash, but not while I'm in the room.
I'm surprised you started providing your services without even knowing if the guy had the money on him. Maybe write on your website that the money needs to be out and that the client needs to go wash-up, that way you can count it with him not in the room.
If it's how to avoid a similar situation in the future, I would just ask for the "envelope" at the beginning of the session saying you wanted to put it in a safe place. When you are in another area (bathroom, etc.) you can count it and make sure you're not being stiffed (pun intended LOL).
If you're asking advice as to what to do with this client, I would suggest that you email him telling him that he owes you money for the session and that if you don't get it, you will blacklist him and that you will contact all those other "nice ladies" who gave him such good reviews. If that fails, just write it off as a part of doing business. Every business that deals with people will encounter flakes and scam artists. The key is to pinpoint them ASAP. Take care. Ciao!
My issue is, when I purchased a professional website which detailed where to discreetly place the envelope, very few guys would adhere to where I asked them to put the donation. The few star customers do. Most did not read my entire website thoroughly and I would have to oddly ask for it anyways. It feels like it has been an uncomfortable thing for me lately since most guys have no clue where to put it when it comes to most providers. I'd rather put my concern into making the client happy not into worrying where they put the money or if they did pay. Not sure if I should be odd about it and request clients to lay the fee where I would like in the final confirmation email/ phone text?
Hi there,
I’m sorry this happened to you
The unfortunate reality is that this kind of stuff does happen and, regardless of aesthetics, you have to protect yourself from loss by doing things that are uncomfortable and unnecessary.
I feel your pain in people not reading your website thoroughly to know where/how you expect the donation. Here are some suggestions:
- in your confirmation email, mention and hyperlink the portions of your website that reference proper donation etiquette and your rates.
- if the client shows up and does not have the envelope immediately presented, kindly prompt him. Yes, awkward, but still necessary.
- You don’t have to count the donation in front of him, just ask him to freshen up in the restroom for you and do it while he is in there.
Just want to add that you should also be using a counterfeit pen to check bills, and also counting them.
To cover the last two, I usually say, “Thanks for coming! Do you mind freshening up for me in the restroom? You can leave the donation on (the counter/desk/nightstand) and I’ll let you know if I have any trouble with it once I check!”
If someone has already showered before the appointment, I will just ask him to take a moment to check his appearance in the restroom anyway.
You’d also be surprised, some people do not find you counting in front of them awkward at all. It gives them a chance to know if there’s a discrepancy right away.
CalloBooty, you sound wonderfully sensitive and caring, but please stop fretting over such a basic expectation as getting paid the proper amount at the proper time in the proper manner. Any guy who has done this more than a handful of times knows the basic drill from reading it on countless provider websites, for instance for incall, unsealed env placed in plain view without prompting at the start of the session before excusing yourself to the facilities to freshen up and give you a chance to count. Not exactly rocket science. If they are not reading your website, include your instructions in an email sent the day before and ask them to acknowledge in an email response that they have read and agree to abide by the instructions. I'm sorry, but any guy who is willing to make this part of the encounter an issue is at best an asshole and at worst a scam artist. Don't put up with it.
My issue is, when I purchased a professional website which detailed where to discreetly place the envelope, very few guys would adhere to where I asked them to put the donation. The few star customers do. Most did not read my entire website thoroughly and I would have to oddly ask for it anyways. It feels like it has been an uncomfortable thing for me lately since most guys have no clue where to put it when it comes to most providers. I'd rather put my concern into making the client happy not into worrying where they put the money or if they did pay. Not sure if I should be odd about it and request clients to lay the fee where I would like in the final confirmation email/ phone text?
Who is this schmuck and who are the providers that PROBABLY went along with his begging for BBFS? You need to cross ALL these providers off your list of reliable references and safe doubles partners. This type of behavior is Blacklist-worthy.
Regarding your actual question, it is weird to see a gal dive into the envelope faster than she dives into my pants. At the very least though, make sure the envelope (or cash) is dropped in plain site, whether you count it or not. If could still be monopoly money or short, but it eliminates the "oh I forgot it in my car" BS.
A winner about the fucker's references. Now, to really have answer to this problem, none of these mongers have a solution for you.
It's the ladies you need to talk to.
That's my suggestion. Talk to the ladies about a better protocol.
Sorry you had an arsehole do that to you. He makes it just that much more difficult for the rest of us. I'd kick his arse if i found him for both reasons.
I was blown away none of the ladies mentioned the BBFS part during reference check as well as nobody blacklisted this guy for doing the same thing that he did to me. It was the most awkward session I've ever experienced for many reasons. That should have been a red flag for me as well.
he could have been a perfect gentleman to the other providers. That's why you should go back to them and tell them that he's using them as cover to abuse other workers
I will present the envelope before I take my pants off, whether she asks for it or not. I will encourage her to into the other room and check it to make sure we are good. It insures that I don't get an email the next day accusing me of shorting her, or "miscounting." Once she has confirmed we are okay on the money, I put it out of my head and enjoy the session. When I'm repeating and the girl knows me, I will usually pay at the end of the session. Either way, I don't like her to count it in front of me.
anyone had ever returned to a room after going to his (or her) car.
As for counting money in front of me, I only recall one gal who did so, and I was fine with it.
As for that douche bag, that is what black lists are for. Use it.
The gal did such a great job I felt like I owed her a tip. I told her I would go to my auto and come back with it, and I did. I would have met her again. But she disappeared from the scene.
One time I forgot the condoms in the car.
He was surprised AF that I came back.
Some may not care (and those types tend to not have good reviews on here or none) but I care about my reputation and I am one to aim for regulars. Not going to walk out on anyone.
As a general rule, anyone going to the car because they "forgot" something is looking to rip someone off (be it a gal or guy).
On a side note, I love when I meet guys and once you are already there, claim to be allergic to latex. Some try to say that for the soul purpose of getting BBFS, they try to put a gal into a position of losing money or doing the BB. Ha ha I always wip out the non latex condoms and it shuts them up. Pretty sure most guys are lying when they claim this. I wasn't born yesterday but thanks. IMHO if a guy is allergic, he;d bring his own or mention it prior, that way there is condoms for him once he is in the room.
I'm so sorry this happened to you! You should let the other gals who he's seen know so they don't continue to vouch for him.
Some of the ladies I've seen will go in the bathroom to "freshen up" a bit---they'll take my envelope in with them. And I always put the donation in a greeting card--so when they come out of the bathroom they can say something like "I really love the card, thank you!!" Now I KNOW they went in there to count what's inside but this takes the "edge" off of things, so to speak, and lets us both relax and eventually have fun!! (Which is what this is all about LOL!!)
We both know why we are there. Also eliminates any claims of being shorted, etc. At least until I take off the boxers and she sees that she is going to get shorted. sigh.
not a big deal. I understand completely and can't blame you.
I usually drop the donation off right after the door of the incall shuts and before the first lfk Exchange. After that I’ll ask for the bathroom, giving her time to count the donation if she wants to.
I’ve learned to get the escort as relaxed as possible concerning the donation at the begin of the session.
I am sure he had the money the whole time, but was just trying to get more out of you. Congrats on sticking to it and not agreeing to BB. Unfortunately some girls may be desperate for the cash and this may be how it gets girls to do this. I would say in the future make sure you see the cash/card/envelope sitting somewhere before you start. Sometimes I have gentlemen that forget, and I ask "do you have a gift for me?". I do not count it in front of anyone. I take the gift to my spare bedroom in the back of my house to count and then return for playtime.
I usually put in in a visible place where she can count it then I go to the rest room. If I don't I will forget about it. After all at that point I'm thinking with my small head. It always takes control after I enter the room.
I have forgotten a few times but they have ALWAYS received payment. One time I drove 80 miles round trip the next day to pay the lady I had forgot about the day before. So I mostly do it for myself. I have a good excuse I'm almost 80 years old. Buy the way these ladies really like us old guys, I think it's because they can whip our ass if they need to.
As to the BBFS I've had at least three of them that asked me for it. Of course I refused. I still have a few good years left to play and don't want any STD's to stop that.
I've had RAs ignore the envelope, and RA's open and count right in front of me. First time I was a bit surprised, but found it didn't bother me at all. I'm not looking for a fake girlfriend but for a lady who provides me good sexual entertainment, clear-eyed and cheerfully, for a set fee. I pay her, she knows it, that's part of the deal. I may want some illusions, but that's not one of them.
Both providers and johns use to defraud each other!
....if the shoe was on the other foot which admittedly and regretfully it often is, the cries of "OUT HER" would be loud and clear, sadly not surprising....
Suzee
Always. I would just blacklist and move on. Sorry that happened!
I just met with a provider who told me how much she had been ripped off/taken advantage of, and it was so upsetting to hear, sorry for the experience. Nearly every provider I have met with has been genuinely great company and warm (and none have ever been less than professional), so to hear that clients do this really is terrible.
I once was short due to conflicting ads and when I finished, I promised I would be back after a run to the ATM and came right back to hand her the cash. (She laughed at how much I assured her I would be back -- I'm sure she knew she could trust me.)
I don't think it would bother me for a provider to check it out in front of me (I'd probably make some lame joke about it), but I'm sure it's easy to discreetly check it as some people have suggested, even with a quick check in the bathroom.
As a guy who tries to be a painless trick, I can say... this is never an issue (OK, almost never... early on I screwed up once but that was due to inexperience), and I sure as hell don't want it to be. There are lots of ways I can enjoy my hour on the clock, and futzing around with a basic issue like the envelope is not one of them. Honestly, how sad is it that we are even having this discussion? You (the provider) are willing to lay out your body for some unknown bloke like me? Guess what, I am grateful enough to not make an issue out of the payment.
Once, as a newbie, she undressed me in another room & I failed to place the donation... oh, yes, she was gorgeous & my brain was fried... but she gently reminded me & I actually had the cash counted and ready.
On another occasion, a repeat visit with a Fav, I was warm & decided at the last minute to leave my coat in the car. Yes, the donation was counted & ready in the pocket. I offered to go get it or to give her my keys (you could see my car outside) but she declined... I was her last appointment & we dressed & walked out together. I put my coat on, & we clasped hands as we had a gentle kiss goodbye & the donation went from my hand into hers.
I do like the illusion. This is admittedly 'old school'. I always have the donation ready. I generally empty my pockets on the corner of her dresser as I would do at home. The first thing out is the donation, held together with a paper clip. After our time, I redress & the donation is silently left behind. So this is my go to unless she directs something different.
the envelope down with my hobby phone, car keys, and any other items like sun glasses on top. When I go to leave, I pick up everything but the envelope.
And I don't care if it is in front of me or not. I have has an issue before of the lady not finding it (It was in plain site exactly where her site told me to put it.) and having to turn around after I left and show her the envelope as instructed on the sink where and how I was instructed by her website to leave it.
I wish every lady would count it up front. This is a business transaction. Like a movie in my opinion the fantasy should start after the business part is handled. It prevents misunderstandings, protects you ladies, and is how business in done in the rest of the entertainment industry. You pay for the entertainment then you get the entertainment.
But It does effect the fantasy your really into him or it is an actual date or some such nonsense. If that appearance of being something other than what it is, is important to you or your clients, you may wish to count it and put it away up front while he is freshening up, and in secret. ten you can hop in the shower with him and let the good times roll knowing your getting yours. If I was a sex worker That is what I would do. I am just too ugly to ever do what you do.
It's so distressing because you put your best foot forward and then you're not respected.
A lot of people have already said useful things about blacklists and references etc so all I say is that I echo them.
As for counting the money, this is my protocol (because a lot of newbies come to visit me too):
Before the appointment, I clearly lay out my cancellation policy and leave a link to my etiquette page.
At the appointment: they or I enter the room. Cheerful hello etc. If they haven't whipped out the money, envelope (or I can't see it if it is an outcall) I gently say: shall we get over the awkward business part and get down to fun *wink*?
They ALWAYS get the idea and do as requested. I then gently direct them to go to the bathroom or I will take myself away there. Turn on the tap as a mask. Count up the money etc. Make sure my condoms are handy. Put it away in bag or safe (I don't care if you heard the noise), come out and cheerfully jump his bones.
My protocol does not change if I'm seeing someone for the first time or the twentieth. Manners are manners.
What I'd say about the awkwardness part: keep it light and cheerful. We all know it is P4P. Don't let someone make you uncomfortable for looking out for yourself. If YOUR mind is at rest, the date is going to go more fun than not, imho.
That's why when I'm seeing a new person, I give them the envelope upfront. You can see the apprehension on providers' faces when they see a Black man walk in thinking if their past experience will repeat itself. When I get comfortable, I ask about the NB rule and sadly theft is the number one reason, I don't know how true that is. I really don't care if you count it in front of me, so far as you're comfortable, I'm good. My regulars, it depends. Sometimes the session starts at the door and I don't get a chance to give them the envelope.
I hear about the Black List.
How do I find it?
I know there was a national registry....but I thought it went offline?