Hi, I recently met with a provider from Oakland, CA from this site. After finishing to my dismay I learned the condom had broke, so basically we were going at it with absolutely no protection. This was 3 days ago. I have noticed a very slight burning when I urinate, but I'm not sure if that is anything serious or even related. My main concern is HIV. I would be unhappy if I caught any STD, but HIV would be devastating. I have been told, that being with a provider who regularly uses protection and doesn't use IV drugs is about as safe as the general population. Still I have my doubts about this, as their odds have to be greater, as they have more partners than most. I know I have to wait 3 months to get tested and that will have the final say in the matter. I definitely will get tested but in the meantime I do wonder what my odds are. I haven't heard of a case of a male catching HIV from a female provider in the US. Is it in actuality rare? I did ask the girl if she was regularly tested for STDs and she said yes every three months and she did not seem even slightly concerned, which did bother me a little. However she did seem very clean over all.  So I guess I'd like to know if anyone has info on the statistics of catching STDs from a provider in the bay area of California.

Thank you.

If I were you, I'd go to the doctor and get tested for Chlamydia.  The symptoms you describe match that exactly--a burning sensation when you urinate.  There are strong meds you can take and it goes away in a few days.  It's not a big deal, but the symptoms are very uncomfortable for guys.  Girls can have it for a long while and not even realize it.  But it's prolly nothing more than that.  And make sure there is LOTS of lub with the action next time.  Helps prevent breakage.  Good luck!

First, bring your own. Get the right size. Avoid those with spermicide Noxy-9. A lot of girls have an allergy to that. Use a water based lube. NOT Baby OIL or Massage Oil. KY or Astra-Lube are fine. Put some lube INSIDE the condom Before you put it on. You should have no problems and be very comfortable. As for the condom you broke. You more than likely are having guilt pains but seeing a MD is cheap and easy and will rest your mind.

http://www.condoms.net/cgi-bin/SoftCart.cgi/condoms/resource_guide.html?L+csense+aOzQ6985+1017593735#nobreak

Insofar as condoms go I will say that I prefer to use my own... the reason why is that it is far FAR more likely for us to catch something from a man, than vice versa... so I like to know where my protection has been and that it WILL work. (ie: not in a wallet, in your car for months, etc.)  

To the original poster, the reason that girl was probably not highly concerned is because she does get tested every three months. Most of us do, not just for HIV but to test for those insidious little things that we might not notice, like chlamydia for example. I don't think you need to be too concerned unless you had any open cuts on your genitals! The odds of a man catching something from a woman are sooooooooooo much lower than they are vice versa.

One more condom tip... don't forget to hold the base of the condom when you withdraw... helps it not fall off and fail you at the last minute!  

Hugs*
Nicole

I provide condoms and will not let my clients use their own. And most providers do the same.  I will provide an assortment of new box unopened for your approval.

"I will say that I prefer to use my own"

Really?

I always ask (I have never insisted, but have never had to) to use MY own, for both the reasons you cite AND because ladies tend to carry the standard size, and I am...ummm...well...not standard sized. I have enough problems with the condoms I *do* use making it to the finish line (most of the time, I don't, and end things with a HJ). Back in HS and college, before I met the women of my later years who had enough experience to tell me that was...ummm...different...I would just use regular size condoms and I HATED them. HATED them! Did I mention that I HATED them?!

You know, for a straight guy, the only erect penis you are likely to ever see up close and personal is your own, so the only basis for comparison is porn stars in porn flicks. Since I wasn't equipped like THAT as best I could tell, I actually used to think I was average or less than. No girl had ever told me different, probably because they had only seen a handful for themselves anyway.

After my divorce I did fair amount (ok, more than a fair amount) of getting around (I married while still in college...I used to be something of a choir boy) which brought up the problem again. Had to use condoms, of course...hated condoms (I may have married early JUST to avoid condoms use...lol). Except this time, my partners, I suppose being both more experience and more comfortable with themselves and "things", would provide commentary. What do you know...a switch to "larger" type condoms, and shazam! things were 1000% better. Still not great, but I could live with it.

All this to say...am I wrong for wanting to BMO (Bring My Own?). Am I putting the ladies I date "on the spot"? (Notwithstanding those who at least CLAIMED to have forgotten to bring any...which has happen to me twice. What is up with THAT??? Scam???)

Thanks for the responses. The burning pretty much went away the next day. Honestly I think it was paranoia. But like I said I am going to get tested for everything in a month and then again in 3 month.  I sometimes shave down there , and it is possible there were microscopic cuts as a result. I was very glad to hear the provider is tested every three months, and I believed her fully when she said she didn't have any STD's as I inspected the area prior to entry and saw no ostensible signs and hopefully testing will verify this further. But I still wonder what are the statistics of catching STD's from call girls? I'm not talking about SW's as I know they can be using drugs and other situations, this girl was definitely clean as they come and was not a drug user in my opinion.  I also think of the brothels in NV where those girls I believe are tested monthly and no one has ever caught anything from them. So there is little reason I should hope that a girl who tests every 3 months and probably sees the same volume of clientle should have anything. So if anyone has some statisical info, ie how often anyone has caught what from a provider. That would be appreciated. Thank you

I don't think you're putting anyone in a bad spot. If you came to see me, you'd have no worries over finding the right size though.  It just makes me more comfortable and is one girls opinion. As for those who always "forget" to bring them, scam or forgetfulness I guess depends on a whole bunch of factors!

Hugs*
Nicole

I have not looked up the actual data on transmission of HIV from female providers to males, however, as I recall the risk is quite small (if I have the time I'll lookup the actual numbers).  Much more likely would be the transmission of bacterial infections such as gonorrhea, chlamydia, and mycoplasma, all can cause a urethritis (the burning sensation you felt) and all are treatable with antibiotics.  Although it would not cause urethritis, syphilis is also a risk, as is herpes.  Having said all of that it sounds like the lady is careful, takes care of herself, and is free from all of these infections. To be safe I would not wait 3 months to see your MD, since some of these infections if untreated may cause complications requiring longer course of therapy than a simple uncomplicated course. Good luck.