I agree with many hobbyists that BBBJ is a dealbreaker, but there is one agency that only allows it's girls to do CBJ. The major difference though is that ALL of the women that work for the agency provide an awesome, personal, and intimate experience. The conversation is always great and the girls are extremely sensual and passionate. As a result, the sex with these agency ladies is unbelieveable. So I only gor for CBJ unless it is with a girl from the agency because I know it will have an excellent time. About 3-4 of my 5 best girls I have ever seen were from the agency.
So I agree that the stuff you mentioned is MUCH more important than abbreviations. Many girls bank on doing certain activities as creating a "great experience". As you have learned though, it is much deeper than that. And those girls are MUCH harder to find.
Hi All
I thought this might be an interesting topic of discussion - I'd certainly like to read what the hobbyists and providers on the board would like to share from their own experience or preferences on
this topic...
I'm new to the east coast scene, having lived in San Diego, The Olympic Peninsula of Washington State and Pearl Harbor HI during my limited time in the US while serving in the US Navy for the last 35 years. I have been fortunate in finding a few favorite providers everywhere I've been stationed over the years Looking back on my own experience, and examining my choices and
preferences at this time in my life, I've put together a short list of the things that matter to me in a provider - the qualities that induce me to put a lady on my short list to see regularly.
These are offered in no particular order of preference but paint a general picture. My favorite ladies of all time shared many of these
qualities, but I really did not realize it until I found the benefit of hindsight and reflection -
Smile and make much eye contact
a whisper in the ear
hold my hand
a lot of touching
speak in a low voice - not pitch but modulation
like to undress me but not hurriedly
wear a little makeup and something nice or nothing
at all
happy to let me lead, but not passive or submissive
vocal but not loud during sex
let me know when they like it or how to make it better
genuinely enjoy DATY
the sex can become urgent but never rough
a gentle unrushed approach to my crank
I find that these things are much more important to me than the "Statistics" that seem to drive the ratings, ie - BBBJ, CIM, Bisexual, etc. etc.
And, frankly, I am finding these things much more rare in the US than in Europe and Asia....
Cheers -
gregory12
I'm intrigued by the US vs European and Asian comparison.
And a profuse thank you for serving our country for so many years. Thank you! -e
I appreciate being thanked for serving. This is more common now than it has been in the past, most especially after Viet Nam, when the reaction was usually hostile. My favorite ladies over the years have been from Iceland, Panama, Italy and Japan, in no particular order. The Japanese have to warm up to you a little but once they do..... a Japanese lady took a hiatus from the business and lived with me for three years at Pearl Harbor - the longest I have lived with anyone in my life, the closest thing to a real love I've ever known. When I was injured in Afghanistan this lady flew in to make sure I was being taken good care of, even though it had been a few years since last I saw her. Perhaps I have not been in the right coast scene long enough, but so far I have been the least impressed... I have only bothered to review perhaps 1/4th of the ladies I've seen - the ones I've considered to have potential. Thankfully I now know 3 ladies that meet my particular preferences to a degree. I also find that things with a particular lady tend to improve as you see one another more often, which is understandable... a degree of mutual comfortability and ease of communication is important.
at least as regards the one and only Japanese woman I've ever had the pleasure to tango with.
I met her when she showed up at my hotel room in NYC, and this 5 foot, 90 pound, AA cupped gal had my heart in a full nelson from the get-go.
It must have been the chemstry that Showmecal has refered to.
What started as being a rub and tug turned into an all night love fest. It took hours for me to convince her to strip down to her underwear and then a few more hours for us to go all the way. It was a dance of love if ever there was one.
I made several trips to NYC at night just to be with her for a few hours.
Then, tragically, when I called her agency the last time, they said that she had left and they don't know where she is now.
If you're reading this Keiko, I'm the guy who had the big dark maroon Oldsmobile, give me a holler.
I think your list of necessary attributes is right on the money. Those are the gals I come back for time and time again. They are out there, but like anything else, you have to be patient and look for them.
Being a good hobbyist makes it easier for a gal to exhibit those attributes also.
Finally, thank you for serving all of us and putting your life at risk for the sake of our country. How wonderful that was for your girl friend to travel all that way to see that you were well cared for.
You must be quite the guy.
Thank you, Sir, for your thanks, and, while I'm at it, for your taxpayer dollars, that provided me with a pretty good life, when I was not being shot at in Viet Nam, Lebanon, El Salvador, Columbia, Grenada, Panama, Bosnia, Serbia, Gulf War I, Afghanistan and Gulf War II as well as a few places I cannot name. I did get the opportunity to be with wonderful ladies all over the world. Reiko and I did have some kind of a bond. I can't really describe it. But as far as me being "quite the guy", the truth is, I'm a bad, bad man. I love the illusion of intimacy, will happily flirt with and romance a lady (professional or civvie target of opportunity), with the goal of bedding her, but I have found that I do not desire or am not capable of forming "real" attachments. That's one of the reasons I'm a hobbyist - I have the needs of a man, I enjoy ladies (and the sex of course) but do not desire the responsibility of a relationship. So, the hobby is a win - win situation for me....
Thank you again for your kind comments.
Again you are very kind. In reality you probably would not like me too much right now. I suffered a TBI in Afghanistan in March of 2007. I am doing pretty well, but I have terrible mood swings, I get really compulsive about sex and alcohol if I don't work at restraining myself, I don't like becoming a civilian (miss my comrades in arms and just don't understand / like the civvie wrold), I don't like the East Coast very much, I really don't like Washington DC. But I'm here because I don't want what happened to me in March of 2007 to be the end of my usefulness, and I have a job waiting for me here in which I can make a difference, at least for a couple of years. And, being truthful. I have deep affection for Reiko, which I know to be fully requited, but I do not like being responsible to / for someone else. (Like I said, I have a black heart). Also, she is twenty years younger than I and has a two a day appetite that I can't keep up with. I know she'd be seeing others - mostly ladies (she does love the ladies) but I'd have a hard time with her seeing other gents. She also has compulsiveness issues that would not help me right now. So, in truth, I put a brave face on, but I'm sort of at loose ends, and not a terribly happy camper. That being said, if we could arrange to share a couple of Japanese ladies somewhere mutually convenient, I'd be "up" for it! - Take care, and safe hobbying to you... Gregory CMCSO USN
If I was pressed, I would say that the Japanese ladies are my favorite. When I was in Tokyo, those of us who were single had a bit of a competition going to see who could bring the hottest dates to our various social functions. Many of us used the services of "compensated dating girls" from Japanese agencies. I found it difficult at first to be allowed service as there is a bit of xenophobia directed toward westerners. But once I broke through I had some of the best experiences of my life. And once a "CD Girl" became really acquainted with an American they came to prefer us to the Japanese businessmen and gangsters who were their usual clientele, because we showed concern for their pleasure, and weren't into some of the typical kink over there. My favorite Japanese lady ran an agency in Nagasaki. She took one look at me and said I was too big and rough and uncultured for her girls. I was ready to head out the door when she said that she thought that she could handle me. That was the beginning of something very interesting, a three year relationship with 5'1" and 95lbs of DYNAMITE, burning bright in my memory to this day....
I agree with all of the above and one addition:
Good conversation. Not one sided conversation, but two-way, intriguing conversation. Makes a world of difference...
I've enjoyed some amazing providers that gave me awesome GFE service; but if making plans to see them is a chronic roll of the dice for reasons of their own discourtesy/unprofessionalism then all the enjoyable good service they once or twice provided is all but forgotten.
I totally agree - I did not mention this specifically because I don't get far enough with a provider to put her onto my short list without it. I understand that a provider will not be able to see me at my whim, but I really appreciate being able to make an appointment with a lady (prefer email) with one to three days notice. I have tried making arrangements in advance here on the right coast perhaps ten times with various ladies whom I had seen previously, and ONLY TWO kept the commitments. This behavior is exceptionally rare EVERYWHERE else I've been....
I have learned that it is very important to communicate and make sure the provider is not uncomfortable physically during the sexual encounter. I feel it is my responsibility to make sure about that. Urgent but not rough is crucial and I also want to learn how to respond to them and please them.
Also if I feel a special chemistry and like them alot I have to be careful to keep my emotions in control so I do not make them uncomfortable. Holding hands, cuddling, and dfk are actually most important to me. The rest will follow naturally.
I am not interested in a mechanical release where the provider cannot wait until I get it over with. I can do that at home by myself and actually enjoy it more that way
For me I need them to be sensitive and sweet. Dirty talk and stuff like that just makes me uncomfortable.
I will end my rambling answer by saying chemistry is the key. I don't think they need to feel it for me as long as they seem to like me and are comfortable but I need to feel it for them.
-- Modified on 7/26/2008 5:01:13 AM
For me, it's a combination of a good physical experience and signs that the lady is interested in actually getting to know one another. If a lady displays a genuine interest in me as a real person and is willing to open up a bit about who she is then I'll most definitely be interested in a return visit. It's as much about the intellectual and emotional rewards of the visit as it is the physical.
Attractiveness, high sexual performance, intelligence, nice personality & punctuality; these are the 5 essential elements that make up an ATF,in my humble opinion.
Interesting. What you have described, in my experience, generally accompanies the attributes I listed but I'm not sure I could define the interrelationship..... I appreciate your thoughts on this.
The ladies I have had repeat sessions with are those with whom I have been attracted to for the overall GFE. It isn't just about the destination but about the journey.
The lady also needs to value my time. To be punctual in returning e-mails, phone calls, and the day of the session are all important.
I remember one instance (I've seen her at least 3 times since) where the lady called the afternoon she landed back in her home town(around 4:30), again at 7:05 when she left her place to come to my hotel for a 7:30 session) then again at 7:25 to say there was no room 345 at the hotel. Long story short, she went to the wrong hotel nearby and was knocking on my door in under 10 minutes. Point being, her communication was exempliary.
If the lady reads this, she will know. We get a laugh about this scenerio each time we meet.
It's the intangibles that make a girl a regular for me. I don't have any trouble finding GFE type ladies who enjoy sex and enjoy being with respectful men. Beyond that is a gray are that revolves around things like sense of humor, age, outlook and temperament. Spending time with a lady should be fun. Sexuality is important but laughter is also very sexual. Before the sex I like to feel at ease with the lady and after the sex I like to be able to relax and enjoy the moment. The brain is still the most important sexual organ and being with a lady that I an in-sync with is much more important than completing a punch list of specific activities.
I agree, the intangibles are much more important than the ratings. One of my favs actually doesn't even allow reviews and has no presence on TER at all.
I can't compare US women to those in other countries as I have never hobied overseas. It is however interesting to me that my preference is for Asian or South American women who were either born over seas or are first generation US citizens.
could I see myself in a civvie relationship. Most of the things that we have listed here above are the kinds of things that we would desire from our GF or SO, except that in this case the sex is a sure thing. I think ShowMeCal had the right word - chemistry. I think the attraction I feel and the attraction she shows or acts make the date.
Gregory12, from my experience, I have to agree this is exactly what most (not all) look for in seeing a lady on a regular basis. Chemistry, reliability and communication also go a long way. Perhaps initially a gentleman may seek out particular stats but it's the experience that keeps them returning!
I love my regulars!
XO Ellyse Taylor
-- Modified on 7/26/2008 8:22:34 AM
Hi Ellyse - you sound like a lady I would get along with famously! (just checked out your website - yep - I think we'd be fast friends...) Good fortune to you - Ciao Signora Bellisima.
I would include everything mentioned above and safety. In the sense that she is very savvy regarding keeping herself, and hence me safe from LE and disease, which includes; very thorough screening, no attempts at unsafe practices toward me or mentioned in reviews, no nosy or angry neighbors, or obvious signs of hourly ongoing visits from different men, and her place feel more like a home that's lived in than a trick pad.
Well, I think you're right. I guess I was assuming some of this. But I've never worried too much about whether the lady uses obvious screening methods. But I agree with your other points completely. One issue you raise is unsafe practices. One lady I like had a review that claimed that she performed unprotected intercourse with the reviewer. I brought this up with her and stated that if she was doing this I would not be seeing her. She claimed that it was absolutely untrue and I believe her, because the reviewer had no track record and she does. Also I have noted that some reviewers tend to exaggerate quite a bit, as though they were competing to impress other reviewers. Several have claimed practices with providers I know which I am certain did not occur....
I agree with many hobbyists that BBBJ is a dealbreaker, but there is one agency that only allows it's girls to do CBJ. The major difference though is that ALL of the women that work for the agency provide an awesome, personal, and intimate experience. The conversation is always great and the girls are extremely sensual and passionate. As a result, the sex with these agency ladies is unbelieveable. So I only gor for CBJ unless it is with a girl from the agency because I know it will have an excellent time. About 3-4 of my 5 best girls I have ever seen were from the agency.
So I agree that the stuff you mentioned is MUCH more important than abbreviations. Many girls bank on doing certain activities as creating a "great experience". As you have learned though, it is much deeper than that. And those girls are MUCH harder to find.
Chemistry and sexual skills.
A lovely post indeed! Those are many of the very same qualities that leave wishing to see a gentleman again.
I would add:
- is able to give into laughter, has a playful manner about him, and isn't afraid to be little silly sometimes
- likes to hold me close
- touches me tenderly (I particularly love when a man gently caresses my face, it can be a very intimate moment)
- isn't afraid to be a little aggressive when passionate
- can enjoy comfortable and meaningful silence
- we're able to get lost in conversation
- compliments or kind things are said with sincerity
- things are able to unfold naturally and take their course without feeling like I'm on stage trying to impress a panel
- loving the smell of his sweat
"I also find that things with a particular lady tend to improve as you see one another more often, which is understandable... a degree of mutual comfortability and ease of communication is important."
This is the difference between giving yourself to a friend, and meeting with a stranger. Learning about each other opens the doors to heightened passion and sincerity.
I am not able to successfully eliminate the intellectual and emotional, and still have an incredible sexual experience. There needs to be a physical and emotional dynamic between both parties for the experience to be unforgettable. I'm thrilled to see so many other respondent acknowledge that more than body sweat is needed to make a tryst enthralling.
Well, you just listed just about everything I love, too!
To that, I'll add:
Chemistry. Sometimes you and a lady just click, and it makes everything better.
Willing to take the lead, sometimes. I'm not a fan of the passive type, I like a woman who wants to make the moves too!
Scent- If she is wearing some incredible scent, I'm putty in her hands! Seriously- I've met two in my life, who-if they had set out specifically to find a perfume just for ME, could not have done better. I have extremely fond memories of both. I just couldn't get enough of them!