Whiskey Tango Foxtrot kiddies, its been a war zone this past week on the General Discussion board!! There has beeen blood and guts spilled, insults thrown at enemy camps..is this the start of the TER GD board wars? Or is everyone vying for a honorable mention on the Hump Day Report? We at HDH were up all night wading thru the carnage!!! Read on...

1. The What the Fuck is he Thinking post of the week goes to Glfrmn...who asked is Blue Balls was normal? WTF? Who the hell holds out for ten days? Okay, granted, you have a 3 hour with an ATF scheduled...but who...just why would you hold off for ten days? So you can drown the poor girl? I didnt know a condom could double as a life jacket. Jack off my man...let the cup overfloweth.

2. The Funniest WTF post..sigh. We at HDH try not to credit aliases but this one was just asking for the abuse it received. Do YOU go alone when meeting a provider? The TER cmmunity was laughing in unison as everybody jumped on that trainwreck. For real? Battle buddies to an appointment? WTF, you have your friend holding your dick too? Telling you what hole to poke? Come the fuck on. However, everyone shared their stories...including the Best Line of the week.."My mom drops me off with the donation pinned to my chest". Some of the Basement Babies here at HDH were relieved to find out they were not alone.  

3. Special credit goes to JayceeofDallas, aka the AliasSlayer this week. If anyone was the life of the party, its this fiesty and sexy chica. We learned what makes a great bj (lube is your friend)AND most importantly...how a girl can get rid of a one night stand. Useful info! Guys got off reading the replies to the BJ tips and girls took notes on how to ditch a one night stand.(hint..water balloon) We at HDH were burning incense in appreciation of Jaycee. Thank you Provider Goddess, for sending Jaycee!! (and thank you for her slaying of Aliases...damn that is soo hot!!)

4. The most informative post of the week goes to Ziggy, who asked how does one prepare for an all aboard the Anal Express session? Some just shower and spread their legs (mrfisher), others use coffee enemas (yes, they do work). The overall point? Flush, bathe and have the envelope filled!! Have fun in Hersey Park everyone!

5. The Cutest (AWWW) post of the week goes to Sweetnicole1 and her Clitaurus. So pink, so cute!! Makes you wanna ride it all over town!!
Pull up to my bumper baby!!

6. The Mood Killing thread of the week goes to Textcat. Men were grabbing their balls in fear and women died a little bit inside as TC shared that several providers told him guys try to get providers pregnant....ON PURPOSE! Everyone whipped out their bullshit meters, locked the chastity belts and the battle was on!! We at HDH sat a ways from the carnage, watching in awe as the Single Most Potent Insult of the week was delivered by UpnCummin52. A collective "dayuuuummmmm" could be heard at HDH and all around TER as the death blow was delivered. (let's all say it one more time....DAAAAYYYUUUMMMMMM.) With this deathblow, upncummin52 has won the Golden Bitchsmacking Glove of the week and title of MASTER Bitchsmacker. i mean, dayuuumm.

7. We found out what providers tell others when asked what is their day job!! Some are brokers, some are Clit Quality Control inspectors...its pretty interesting to learn that (gasp!) providers have a life outside of the bedroom! Who in the hell would have ever thought providers do more than sit around looking sexy all day waiting for a gent to email/call them?? We at HDH now have to re write the autobiography of a call girl, as we have it ALL WRONG. Dammit.

8. Okay. The TER GD board has had at least three topics dealing with sexual assault...so, we at HDH to address this matter...seriously. There seems to be a lot of confusion as what is considered crossing the line. Whether is BDSM or a GFE session..when someone says NO and its ignored? That is when the line is crossed. Point blank. Anyone can wax poetic and argue the fine points...but when the NO, verbal or non verbal is given...pay heed dammit. This is no laughing matter. For those who think BDSM leads to acts of uncontrolled Violence..get a fucking clue. We at HDH thank Megan Morgensen for her post bringing this ugliness to light..and we nominate DC as the Hero of the Year...for putting what every woman fears into words that everyone can understand..so that all can get a fucking clue.

now that that has been taken care of..back to the wild jungle that is the GD board!!

9. Every week we see the same PSA...about people with stank fingers, ass, coochie and balls. Sigh. Wash up folks..so we dont have to see the SAME FUCKING POST week after week. Damn. If anyone needs pointers, tips and advice, please read the HDH handbook on Washing up Fer Dummies...now available in hardcover..with a plastic covering so you can leave it in the bathroom anytime you need a refresher.

10.Oh yes, how could we forget the Wake Up Call of the week? OMG. I thought we covered the topic of what is real and not last week...dammit. So..the question was asked..about a sugar daddy arrangement...hell, for a low 5 figure, a provider would stop being a provider and become exclusive with one gentleman....yaaahhhh. Whip out the bullshit meters on this one folks! Sadly, the OP asked everyone to be brutally honest...the Most Honest post goes to Khori who asked the all important question..was this what he wanted? Who's idea was this? Uh huh. Thought so. Time to wake up folks...oh, did we mention how fucking hot Khori is? Beauty and brains??? yummy.

11.Ooohh...yah. The Call for Common Sense post of the week...and this is a freaking good one. Question for the masses..if you are meeting with someone, in a hotel and you are a bit lost confused on the directions do you
A. Swagger up to the front desk like a Rhinestone Cowboy and announce who you are there to see..in hopes the desk clerk will ignore the fucking fact you made it obvious there is a working girl in the hotel?
B. Wander the hallways mumbling to yourself and alerting hotel staff that a crazed fucktard is in the building?
C. CALL THE PERSON YOU ARE MEETING, making use of the wonderful invention that is the fucking cell phone???
Are you serious?? There are fucktards who ask hotel staff?? Fucking morons...and we at HDH hope they are smacking themselves upside their head and feeling DUMB AS SHIT. Duh. Get a clue.

12. The LMFAO post of the week goes to Ed2000 for his youtube video. Politics and sex can find a happy medium..if we all just..concern ourselves with getting our dick sucked. We at HDH headquarters are wondering if we can get a refund on our presidental contributions...and devote ourselves to this new cause. We love being on a bandwagon...and love our new motto.
"YOU JUST GOTTA GET YOUR DICK SUCKED." To hell with global warming!! Poverty? Fuck it. Smoke some herb and get your dick sucked. Life is good. Join us in this movement!!

13. The Who the Fuck cares (as everyone is going to do what they want to do anyways) post goes to acceptable reasons to use an Alias. Ha! The rules also say we should all be nice and not fucking curse...but who the fuck follows that slackass rule? NO ONE!!! If we did, this board would just wither up and die. Stupid rules. Ha!!
We at HDH SNEER at the damn rules and flip em off. Ha ha, we say. ha ha.

So, as always, there was just too much bull hockey to wade thru..and TER members really tried to make HDH actually work...WTF is up with that? There were some great great posts..three pages worth! Wow!!

Happy Hump Day Everyone!!!
Remember, get your dick sucked, be kind to others and when you want to be evil..use an alias.

We at Hump Day Headquarters want to thank the person who finally, finally screwed DC silly.

ITS ABOUT FUCKING TIME!!!

Thank you to the Provider Goddess for allowing this miracle to happen. We humbly pray that Johngaltnh also gets laid...as we are tired of having to translate whatever he types.

in the holy spirit of men, women and toys,

this we pray.

Out of deference and to your multiple pleas, I am getting my dick sucked and fucked in about 3 hours. As I am cumming (and I know it will be hard), I will silently call out your name: "Oh, Khym, suck it girl." How's that?

just get a little grumpy if I go a few days without.

and im on my way to fight the blizzard to go get laid myself.

Now - Now let's not get carried away with theres sayings.


Khym, I really do think you should see me in the confessional.



Thank you
2010 = 298

If he's gonna be this accepting and generous, everyone should pony up $$. That should keep him CONTENT for awhile!!!!

to being a badass.

are ya kidding? i just signed my forever lease on my penthouse in hell.

the jacuzzi filled with ice cubes gets installed next week.

and Clint Eastwood is my butler.

ha!!

Not that I'm looking forward to it or anything. (*grin*)

This will grant the boon of a brief respite to the long-suffering masses.

lol. but have fun!! lmao.

We met an hour earlier to accommodate another caller, but I got there a few minutes early and was talking about your post. I think she saw it as a personal challenge, so thank you for motivating her, osmosisally (sic), that is. You were there in spirit. LOL!

hee hee.

i am superwoman!!

John, for the sake of all of us, don't talk yourself out of the pussy man. I mean, she's going to clean your clock, bake your cookies, and bust a move on your ass. So don't write her a poem, a dissertation, or even a verse to an old song. She wants to fuck and suck, but not TALK!

... I have seen this lady many times. We usually spend a couple of hours quite literally discussing and exchanging books on mostly heavy heavy political topics. We do that over the phone a couple of times a week too. Plus email.

THEN we get down to business. For us, all that intellectual/political stuff is foreplay.

And the business? I am not at all exaggerating, Radcow -- I have no earthly clue how she does this.

The sex just seems like really great sex at the time it is happening -- but then for the next 3-5 days it's like I'm drunk or something. Instead of sleeping 7-8 hours a night like usual, for the next few days I sleep like 10-12. And I keep drifting off to sleep during the day. For 3-5 days after! It borders on dangerous.

She's the only lady I've ever seen who produces this phenomenon; but I think what it means is that even though there is an awful lot of conversation in our appointments ... she definitely lays the shit right out of me.

but could you please, please, just once...

type a reply using less than 100 words??

lol. love you baby. go get laid!!

git er done!
(sorry, i am listening to country music tonite...stuck on Big and Rich right now..)

John is in a parasitic relationship with himself. The minute he gains clarity, he finds a way to sabotage it with a disease called logorrhea. You see, coherence robs him of his manhood. He drifts between extreme loquaciousness and a foreboding sense of doom. In other words, John needs words to get off, beat it off, and yes even for you to suck him off. Forgive him.

layage approaches soon and I'm gonna enjoy it.

I have NO CLUE what in the hell Radcow is talking about, but since it has a smiley face it must be ok.

And I love you back Khym!