This will mostly make sense if you read the SD board, but the long and short of it is..
I still would like to send my 'book' of thoughts to some media person regarding this 'Game' and portray what it really is like, what really goes on VERSUS what the media portrays and what people have wrongfully assumed.
What would help me do it faster is if you all contributed your thoughts - whatever you would want people to know and understand; what it means to you, etc, etc. and I would compile it all together. For example Yoda's in the Virginity thread is one post I would like to use. All indentifiers, including dates, and TER - so all identifiers - would be removed. I'm only looking for content.
If someone wants to point me to a post or a thread, that's fine, too.
You can PM me here, or email me at [email protected]. BTW, I'm soon to be using the Yahoo email address all the time now, as Ziplip is ZipSHIT in my opinion.
Please, good material with good attitudes and content only - something you'd say before 60 Minutes or Oprah, etc. - nothing goofy or smarta**.
I want to get this done in the next week or two, so HURRY!
Yes, I think the timing is perfect. I think people like Jane Juska, the 60+ year old woman who put an ad in the paper saying she just wanted great sex, and then wrote a book and it has made a very positive impact on people's conceptions about people, sex and sexuality! Now she's speaking all around the country!
I'm from San Diego, and the Game here is playing hardball all the way. If arrested (depending on which part of town), you now get to have you picture and name in the paper, your car confiscated - AND you have to pay blue book value to get it back! (not to mention still making payments, if applicable).
They have a news segment about once a week here on Prostitution and all it's 'problems'. Two weeks ago, they interviewed a local Provider (under cloak and shadow) and what she had to say was distorted and clipped to promote 'their perspective'. They made us sound like a bunch of criminals.
Also, this is in timing with the mayoral elections, and last night they were basically saying that the City (not county) of San Diego has some serious budget problems. Well, look how much money was spent on the stings, the manpower, the fake ads, and TER memberships and all the man hours put into arresting us bad people! Huge waste of money; wrong interest.
I think sending to someone who really IS a good journalist, someone who does do their homework and dig deep would open up people's eyes that we are just normal people who meet - have dinner, have sex - just the way the Mainstream people do - only BETTER!!
I think they need to understand the Millenium way of dating and stop seeing what we do as a CRIME, which is ridiculous. It's no more of a crime than people dating.
I'd like to see them do a 48 Hours or a 60 minutes that would at least be equal to a show I watched a number of years ago on people in the "Lifestyle" - swingers. The show I watched (LONG before being a Provider) was a really informative eye opener, and I for one, got a real in depth understanding of what that lifestyle was all about.
I think it's wrong to be illegal, and we shouldn't have to be in fear of LE, cars being taken, picture in the paper for doing things that bring about good things and it's not hurting anybody.
I'm saying it's time to question whether the laws are wrong. I'm saying if they are at least going to talk about it so much on the news here, AT LEAST GET IT RIGHT!!
Geez, the round-heeled woman was 60-some years old, and I don't believe she sold it. Surely you can appreciate the difference between her and a 20-something blue-eyed blonde with implants who's charging guys $500 per hour and whose website photos show her in all her glory, complete with reviews about BBBJTC, etc.
1. The country is still full of conservative thumpers, and a media report ain't gonna change their minds. Ever.
2. At least half of heterosexual marriages are comprised of a woman, and a media report ain't gonna change their minds. Ever.
3. You're obviously naive about the media. They're not in it for "truth" or to attempt to change "social mores," they're in it for money (it's just another form of prostitution). They have to report what sells. What sells it titillation.
4. People *do* get hurt. Marriages end with vicious anger and disgust because somebody "cheated." As mentioned in another thread, Johns (the original name for "hobbyists") spend more than they can afford -- and that can screw up lives.
5. As seen too often here, men seem to have a knack for confusing sex with "romance" and "fall in love" with a prostitute (the original name for "providers").
IF you were able to sell your story to media, it would become twisted and perverted because the media would seek out the "dark side" of prostitution and highlight it -- because IT WOULD SELL!!!
There was a new thing passed in L.A. Regarding this. If I remember correctly, its one month impound and fine. Difficult to explain to the SO why you can't get the minivan back. Yet another reason to visit an indie at her place. I'm too lazy to drudge up a link, but our man can.
Sedona, you know that I have only respect and admiration for your good sense, compassion and sense of humor [although I only know you from your posts here on TER]. However, I tend to agree with "Dumb as a Post". I think that in general, and particularly during this political season and the sh** storm surrounding the issue of gay marriage,[to which I have no objections], any attention drawn to "the game" will more than likely have negative consequenses for all of us. If reason and sincerity and truth could always prevail over ignorance, bias, and religious fervor [to say nothing of political oportunism] there would be peace in the world and love - or at least tolerance - in all our hearts. Think about this: If you were a public figure, could you support -or at least not oppose - gay marriage AND the game and still hope to maintain your position, especially an elected position? On the other hand, think of the mileage you could get ranting and raving about moral decadence and the need for more stringent laws and enforcement. And keep in mind the media's interest in keeping the pot boiling for as long as it sells ads!Also, while we here accept and admire your convicictions, to "outsiders" you could be viewsd as one who is simply trying to promote your own cause/business.
Sedona, I like your idea. From the opinions and advice you've posted, I believe you are articulate and well-spoken. However, given the current media climate, I'm not sure that this is the time for your project. As proof, I would offer a report I heard on NPR on Friday (2/27). The reporter pointed out that, at his swearing-in, the Attorney General promised vigorous enforcement of the pornography laws and that the Justice Department would give all possible aid to local law enforcement in pursuing, prosecuting and punishing those who engage in pornography, prostitution and any other type of sex-for-hire enterprise. If you were preparing a master's or doctoral thesis, I would help you in a heartbeat. However, with all due respect (and knowing that the worst vice is "advice"), I would advise you to keep a low profile at this time. That said, when the climate changes (when we get a new democratic President), I would love to help.
I can understand your enthusiasm for the project but it's important to be unattached to the outcome of your endevour, what you say may be edited beyond your message into something other than what you are aware of. Given the nature of reality shows on television, the public is primed for edgy content, are you prepared to have a harsh light applied that may outshine your rosy glow?
I like the idea of a book on the subject. There are some excellent books that explore "uncharted" areas of society without revealing the identities of the "interview" subjects or the geographic area in which they live. (Read Rachel Simmons' book "Odd Girl Out" about agression among school-age girls for ideas on how to do this successfully.)
With due respect to Fearless (with whom I agree on most things), I don't think you need to wait for a Democrat in the White House to start the ball rolling on this. I'd recommend compiling your information, writing something to tie it all together and illuminate the reader as to the conclusions you'd like them to draw, and then start sending out query letters to literary agents. (PM me for some suggestions on where to look for that...and some other advice on the publishing industry.)
What you're doing has power...there was a time when courtesans were well-respected members of society who wielded considerable power and were often prodigiously wealthy. You may make some small moves back in that direction by illuminating the "Game World." Speak out!
The very last thing we need is publicity. It doesn’t make any difference how great you feel this hobby is, or how legal you think it should be. The fact is it would not be portrayed to the public in a positive way. There are a lot of people who know nothing about escorting on the internet. However, if an expose’ was done, they would be up in arms that something like this could exist and the police aren’t doing thing about it. The fact is the police are aware of a lot of “illegal” activity and take no action because it’s not worth the time and effort. However, if someone complains to the police about alleged illegal activity, the police are obligated to investigate. “The police can get anyone they go after. The key is to not them know you exist.” Carlo Gambino circa 1970 “Loose lips sink ships.” circa WWII Please do us all a favor and keep it here in the Discussion Boards.
Perhaps it would depend on the medium you use to convey your message.
Maybe putting something in book form would work to a degree. I don't know, i just always assumed that someone who writes in book form has alot more involvement in terms of what the final product says, but i could be way off base with that. I guess the up side may be that you wouldn't be touting it on the 6 o'clock news and jamming it in everyones face weather they agreed with it or not, possibly averting some unwanted attention along with the wanted attention. The downside is the same thing, you wouldn't be touting it on the 6 o'clock news and jamming it in everyones face.... Your target group in the bookstore or something of that nature would be alot smaller, and just that..... a target group. I would expect the vast majority of readers who would purchase from there would have the same views, thus no affect.
In terms of the daily media circus, i would have to pass. There's just no way to guarantee what's going to be said/printed and once it's out, it's out. If they're wrong, oh well. The 1st Amendment doesn't say they have to be right. They'll print a retraction or sneak in an "oh by the way such and such on last nights broadcast should really have sich and sich" as the final credits roll(you know, the part noboby reads or listens to) but the damage will have been done.
Case and pointafter 17 years working in chemical manufacturing at a company with alot of environmental issues i could pick from alot, but this one about my personal business is easiest to explain) About 10 months ago the property that my business sits on was purchased by a group that had also purchased a good deal of other propertys locally in preperation of moving a local sports team to the area. It was a big enough tudo that the local paper decided to run a story about it.
Against my better judgement when the paper called to make sure they had their "facts straight" i told them exactley what was going on. In fact, the head of the party buying the property also told them the same thing(i was there when he did, so i know for a fact what they were told). When the story ran, instead of it saying that the property at my address was purchased, it said that the business itself was purchased, and also went on to inflect that it would be under new management at the very least or most likely closed.
There was no mention that i still have another 3 years on my lease with four 5 year extensions after that cannot be refused by the lessor should i decide to use them(yes, yes, i know, there's always condemnation). There was also no mention of the fact that the new owners were not interested in the parcel my business is on and only purchased it because the previous owner also owned the vacant parcel next to my business(which is the land they wanted) but he refused to sell only that parcel since they are connected. There was no mention tat because they aren't interested in the parcel my business is on they are willing to sell it me to recoop some of the cost of having to buy more then they needed/wanted. These are all facts that were explained beforehand, but between half assed reporting and editing everything got turned around.
Three months later i was about 1 week from being out of business from what was a fairly comfortable position before the story ran. As soon as it came out, anyone who had a beef with the new owners of the property stopped coming in. As did anyone who thought we were under new management, and anyone who assumed we were going to be closed soon anyway so why should they bother coming back, might as well find someplace new now. The only things that saved me were having been established for awhile(alittle over 5 years) and the cold weather(i do something that people can't do on their own in the winter)
It didn't matter to the paper one bit that they reported wrong. They did what was their policy, they printed a "correction" (Notice they're never retractions anymore, retractions infer saying something you should known better than to say). Only problem was the correction is a 2 inch box on page 3 versus a page 1 story. I talked to asst editors, editors, lawyers, and even politicians, but nobody could help because they have such a wide scope of "error".
I agree with the heart of what you say and would like to do Sedona, i mean everything does have to start someplace afterall. But i can't see a good way to rock the boat just alittle so to speak and then wait for the waves to die down alittle and give it another shove. I would love for everything we participate in to be open and honest, but i've also learned the hard way that honesty isn't always the best policy. If you can figure out a good way, i'm in. But it's going to take a better head then i have to figure that out.
This is a public forum. I have no idea how many reads each of these messages gets every day but if you think this is some sort of secret society, you're mistaken.
There have been many books and documentaries done on this subject already. The one that comes to mind immediately is Hookers On The Point, the HBO special.
That has been an ongoing project for the videographer and you see year after year the same woman interviewed. Well, at one of them. Do you think this special has brought any additional wrath on them? No, it hasn't.
The only thing that concerns me is, John Ashcroft and his bible thumping cronies. In a subtle way, these puritanical thinkers are slowly trying to push their supermoralistic views on the entire population.
No doubt that your intentions are notable, to bring some rationale and genuflection on the postive aspects of the "hobby." But I believe that you overestimate the "benefits" of this profession and overestimate the belief that people really have interest in the "dark" side of the fantasy with which providers and Hobbyists partake.
Just like the issue of marijuana, no matter how you feel about the legitimazation of prostitution, the fact is its illegal. There are not going to be parades of "hobbyists" and "providers" marching hand in hand down Sunset Blvd. There will not be a national referedum for a constitutional amendment. Governor AhhNold will not proclaim a statewide "Ho Down Day!" The vast majority of providers and hobbyists prefer the anonymity. In fact most providers have alternate careers and lives, and can't afford the connection. Hobbyists who are married, in sensitive career positions, or other life level can ill afford to confess their "secret indulgence." And despite what ads say, the vast majority of providers don't enjoy making a living this way. I respect those who say and believe they do, but its a underwhelming minority.
As a devout capitalist, I encourage you to promote your memoirs and wish you the best of success for a media tour. If this is your means to fame, then by all means "go for it!" Though many of us talk a good game, we are not at the confidence level required for "outing" ourselves, even discreetly within the pages of a "book," or behind a "blue" screen with a microphone.
Here's what you yourself said: "regarding this 'Game' and portray what it really is like, what really goes on VERSUS what the media portrays and what people have wrongfully assumed."
You want the media to present a prostitute-friendly story. Ain't gonna happen.
by the time the "media person" shares your "book" with the public, you wouldn't recognize it. They don't want to hear how very nice the ladies I've met are. What they want is a tale of exploitation...sadness...to excite and shock their viewers/readers. It would be career suicide to portray the "game" as something harmless.
Is that the only people ever examined are the people who are arrested or who have been scammed.
Sedona, if you are interested in writing something, I would suggest that you write a book about "what men like". I am always fascinated to go through a grocery store counter and read the latest Cosmo or Redbook article over what turns me on.
I think there is a BIG market (for women) for a book by somebody who REALLY knows what men like and can talk to other women about what that means and how to figure that out. As you might guess from the people you met, there are many women who don't appear to have a clue.
If you are going to talk to the media, I sggest you stick to that subject. Something like
"A lot of men want to see me and they like me a lot. Many see me repeatedly. They like the time we are together. The atmosphere is usually romantic and seductive. On the whole, the men are pretty normal in their behavior and attitudes. I like the time I spend with them and I like the money. Nobody if being forced to do anything here. Our behavior is safe: I won't have unprotected sex. Who is being hurt? Why is this interesting? What is contraversial?"
Such a bunch of doomsayers. I doubt that what you write will have a negative impact on the "hobby". Doesn't anyone remember the book The Happy Hooker? It portraied (sic) prostituition in a relatively positive light and was a very popular book in the 70's.
The only way to insure that the truth comes out is to write a book, find a publisher and sell the book. You will make a mint and you will control the message. I don't think that there are any mainstream news outlets interested in simply telling the truth, they could not withstand the heat from the moralists. A book should focus not on the hot details but why men (and women) choose to use provider services. It is best to make an analytical, academic argument on the merits and benefits of the escorting and hobbying rather than the "victimless activity between consenting adults" argument the basis of any book.
Unfortunately it looks like your attempt to purchase VIP membership has failed due to your card being declined. Good news is that we have several other payment options that you could try.
VIP MEMBER
, you are now a VIP member!
We thank you for your purchase!
VIP MEMBER
, Thank you for becoming VIP member!
Membership should be activated shortly. You'll receive notification!
after 17 years working in chemical manufacturing at a company with alot of environmental issues i could pick from alot, but this one about my personal business is easiest to explain)