Clients,

Any thoughts of the value of seeing a known referring provider instead of a known non-referring provider of equal?  A repeat of a post within a different thread:

In you post, you have written: "I accept a ladies referral, but she has to have a good reputation herself, for there are a great number of less than stellar scam artists and garbage out there to be able to take a strange ladies word for face value also.  I do research the ladies reputation when a name is given to me.  If there isn't any information on her or her reputation is unsavory, then I reject it and ask for other means of verification.  Again, the few bad apples that ruin it for everyone.  Especially, those ladies that have been burned in this scenario."

This is an exceptionally accurate paragraph, and it brings to mind the thought of having a registry of ladies that offer referrals to other providers.  With the understanding that these reviewing forums are supposed to be the "Better Business Bureau" of the ASP Industry, what if there were a mention of a "Better Reference Registry" where providers could gain accurate and timely information regarding a client's reputation?  Even something as simple as, "Here is a list of providers which offer client references for fellow providers" with names and email addresses.  This could potentially be a good resource for clients, too, particularly if they are just getting started as hobbyists.  

Would clients be more likey to choose a provider if the simple statement, "Provides References: Yes" were listed on her reviews profile, versus one which states, "Provides References: No"?  

Any thoughts on a "BRR Stamp of Approval" to be added to provider review profiles?

Just a thought,

BJ, Palm Beach, FL
[email protected]

I do think a referral from a well known provider is a safe way to verify a client.

--Here is a list of providers which offer client references for fellow providers" with names and email addresses--

Creation of a known paper trail?  I don't like it.

-Hoot.




-- Modified on 3/11/2003 12:05:48 PM

I think that it could be included within a ladies site, as well as added to the review section.  The site is already there, as are the reviews, so what difference would it make as to whether or not this little tidbit of information were added?  

There are a lot of ladies entering this endeavor and it is hard to keep track of everyone.  This could be a viable way to make the process easier.  

Lauren

The less paper the better.

-Hoot.

Most of your email to any provider is probably on their hardrive or the email server, unless they are using some sort of shredding program, even then it remains on the server. Deleting it doesn't mean it is gone forever. If LE was that diligent in the search for evidence you would be found out regardless.

I realize there could be a certain amount of information a provider may already have/retain.  My point is not to add to that repository via another process.  Why make it easier for LE?

-Hoot.

Your information would not be anywhere.  A simple suggestion of adding a line to a ladies profile and/or review about whether or not she provides referrals is all that is being suggested.  

Lauren

This would be good for hobbyists, both new and old.  Everyone needs references one time or another.  I like a woman who is comfortable giving a reference.  Some don't, and I understand if her privacy is an issue.  But I do value those that will give you an honest review.

Whether or not a gal would be willing to provide a reference for me if it should be needed wouldn't enter into my decision to see her one way or the other.

As to the idea of a "Better Reference Library", that would proably make me shy away from seeing her.  As others have pointed out, no one wants a paper trail.  And while information might be on the hard drive of an individual provider, I feel that poses a far less potential for problems than a large central database might.  Which BTW is part of the reason I deal with independents & not agencies.

Something like that wouldn't matter to me. But I have the luxury of already knowing several ladies who would give me a reference if I needed one. For clients just starting out, that might make a difference.

Your fears are uhderstandable...however, any bit of information, whether just a name or phone number, or a folder of 1MB of data on you, will be just as easy for a forensics specialist to find if they want to.  It isn't making it any harder or easier.  I think the benefits outweight the risk in this case and would welcome the addition to our provider's profiles.

No one is suggesting a database. Just a little "BRR" on the providers site to say that she gives references.

It seems to me that the 3rd paragraph of her post suggests  otherwise.  I've taken that to mean something along the lines of Roomservice2000 (or whatever the name is/was).  I have no problem with simply an indication on a site that a gal provides references, but it certainly wouldn't influence me to see her.  If I traveled a great deal & was seeing providers all over the country, I might feel otherwise.  As it is, I simply don't have the need as I can easily obtain whatever references are needed locally.

Paper trail?  What does this have to do with whether or not a lady is willing to provide referrals for clients?

BJ, Palm Beach, FL
[email protected]

You mean this paragraph?

"This is an exceptionally accurate paragraph, and it brings to mind the thought of having a registry of ladies that offer referrals to other providers.  With the understanding that these reviewing forums are supposed to be the "Better Business Bureau" of the ASP Industry, what if there were a mention of a "Better Reference Registry" where providers could gain accurate and timely information regarding a client's reputation?  Even something as simple as, "Here is a list of providers which offer client references for fellow providers" with names and email addresses.  This could potentially be a good resource for clients, too, particularly if they are just getting started as hobbyists."

How is a list of escorts' name along with their email addresses a paper trail back to the client???

BJ, Palm Beach, FL
[email protected]

Nowhere in my post had I mentioned any type of database, so I would love to know where you gents are coming up with this topic.

I personally fail to see the harm in being able to establish beforehand whether an escort would be willing to provide a reference for a client in the future if needed.  Where's a @#$%&* database discussed here???

Hello???  I'll break it down nice and simple for ya: a link to one page, with a nifty little graphic which signifies a "seal" something similar to the BBB -- but for BRR -- with the heading, "Below is a list of providers which have agreed to provide references for other providers:"  Therein, a list of escort names, linking to their email addresses -- THAT'S ALL!  On the profile/review page for an escort there is a one-line radio button on the form saying, "Provides Referrals:" and after this, the options are "Yes" or "No," -- OR -- our nifty little Seal of the Better References Registry "BRR" -- meaning ONLY that she will provide references to another provider if requested and confirmed by the client.  I'm still not sure how "Registry" suddenly turned into "Library," either....  At exactly what point did this turn into an online library of client information???

Do you guys actually *read* these posts, or just throw in any scare tactic flare up rumor mongering whether it is relevant or not just so you can have something antisocial to say?

BJ:  Hey guys, wouldn't it by nifty for everyone if we all knew what providers would supply references for us?  

Peanut Gallery:  THE SKY IS FALLING!  THE SKY IS FALLING!

BJ, Palm Beach, FL
[email protected]

-- Modified on 3/11/2003 7:50:48 PM

Perhaps it isn't my thoughts that come out garbled (as I thought they were in some previous posts).

I'm with ya BJ ;^)

I do travel most of the time, more than I remain at home. And I also like to meet new women while in foreign lands, therefore, a well known woman that is going to give a reference is a plus for me.

I will usually ask at the time of our meeting if I can get a reference, and I have never been denied.

BJ,

It was just a misunderstanding...

I took this sentence in the original post "Here is a list of providers which offer client references for fellow providers" with names and email addresses." to indicate that "names and email" addresses would be names and email addresses of the hobbyists -- that's it.  No distinction in the sentence was made as to WHOSE names and email addresses.

(Your last post was a bit inflammatory.  When asking where the confusion exists in a proposal, usually whacking the stakeholders in the head does not yield the most opportune results.)

-Hoot.


-- Modified on 3/11/2003 9:23:23 PM

all over on each and every single lady in this community.  There is her website, her posts, the reviews, the advertisements, and for some memberships here and perhaps elsewhere.

For the gents, he has his email, his memberships, the reviews he has posted, not to mention whatever information is floating around out there on him with the ladies he has visited with.

That information that is floating around with the ladies has also been a topic of great concern to many.  How many have gotten unwanted calls, out of the blue cold calls, found that their information is listed in some database for reference checks without giving a choice as to whether or not they prefer to do so, and know for certain that a lady does not retain his screening information after the fact despite what she says, how many have been blackmailed and ripped off with a cash/dash scenario.

There is a risk to each and every individual that participates in this forum and the cold hard fact is that there is some kind of trail to each and every one of us in one form or another, even to the ladies that do not keep information for although it may have been deleted on her system, that information remains on her harddrive until written over.    

There has been thread after thread of heated discussions on screening protocol and the discretionary risks.  The discussions have pointed out valid points on the risks involved on both sides of the fence, but no viable solution that would make everyone happy has ever been presented.

Where this initial post is concerned, I do not see why there is such an overall panic among the gents with regards to any papertrail.  

Again, a mere little addition to a review form with a yes or no question on the review form as to whether or not a lady provides a reference is all that has been suggested, along with an additional line and/or insignia on a ladies site that lets the gents know that she will provide a reference.  How this compromises a gentleman's need for discretion is something I fail to understand.  

In fact, I feel it would be a way in which to give further insurances to a gent that his information will be handled with the utmost discretion and give assurances that the reference she has received comes from a reputable and respected lady.  

There is plenty of opportunity for scam artists and garbage to take advantage on both sides of the fence and those individuals continually make it difficult for those that want to play fair and square.  

There are a number of ladies that will not provide references, a number of ladies that do not follow protocols and a number that continually compromise a gents need for discretion.  

IMHO, this has been the first liable suggestion that would make it easier to discern whether or not a lady or gent are honorable and discreet with the most minimal risks to all.  

The insignia itself can mean far more on whether or not a lady will provide references, but can also in some sense be a badge of honor bestowed on only those ladies that do follow protocol and has a very good reputation within the community, thus separating her from the less honorable and making it easier for the gent to discern whether or not he would feel comfortable with a lady.

Lauren

     

...who may have misinterpreted the post.  And bj---why so hostile??  I simply offered my opinion to the question, & I don't think it was in an inflamatory way.  Disagree with what I feel & I have no problem with it.  But telling me to stop putting words in your mouth, as you said in your other post, seems a bit of an over-reaction.

-- Modified on 3/12/2003 11:37:30 AM

Yes, that's why I suggested the sentence at the top of the page say,

"here is a LIST of PROVIDERS...."

not,

"here is a list of CLIENTS with references...."

My bad! I guess the phrase "list of providers" was not descriptive enough.

If my post seemed inflammatory, it's because every discussion on this board in the last week has gone to shit.  What starts as a positive contribution turns into an unrelated argument over semantics.  A hearty Pulanski debate turns into an argument over parenting daughters.  A well intentioned post about lube in condoms becomes cause to chide someone for misspelling.  Tattoogirl, probably one of the most positive contributors to our little community here is insulted.  An avoidant provider is not only accused of mental illness, but this is applied to all escorts broadly.  I try to include a little something positive on the board, and I get four responses, three of which head off in a completely unrelated thread 5 replies deep.

It's just a little frustrating, is all... and here I was just *raving*, along with several other *terrific* providers that positively contribute here, about how great the community was in TER compared to TBD.  I guess I must have just arrived at a high point, just after ABFE was tossed out.  So much for the honeymoon.  This is a downward spiral that's just downright depressing.

So, who's gonna be the first jerk to accuse me of PMS?

BJ

-- Modified on 3/12/2003 5:06:22 PM

I think your idea has some merit and would provide some useful information.  I also think that a field on the the provider profile such a "requires references" (Yes) No would be a useful tool for hobbyists.  Any hobbyist who does not wish to obtain a  reference from a former provider(s) to satisfy a new provider could eliminate those new providers requiring references from his search or if he so desired he could eliminate any ladies from his search who do not require references.