TER General Board

A good point
Blue Thrills 4373 reads
posted

I think drojek makes a good point.

The reason I'm asking is because I recently decided to team up with another provider that posted to visit this area. The provider and I had been chatting for a while and we had communicated very well and still do.  Personally I really like her although we are different in many ways and have different skills, but the point is another provider posted a bad report on her on another board. I don't know the full detail. I got a few phone calls and emails telling me not to team up with her because of the posting, not that the posting was true but just because it was posted. So I deleted my posting afraid that it would damage me. I posted and asked her to email me about the bad posting regarding her and ***.  She did email me and explained why the provider did what she did. The MO also deleted the posting the provider posted.

My question is? This provider have always been straight with me. I somewhat know about her past which she told me about her from day one of us meeting. So why did I feel the need to delete my posting regarding the two of us teaming up when I know she is a trusted friend.  I felt soooo bad and told her it was a first  impulse and i was sorry. I really want to team up with her because real friends are hard to come by.

Jealousy,Wrong or Right is the answer I'm seeking from my friends on the board.


-- Modified on 6/18/2002 6:50:45 PM

I don't see a problem. If you consider this lady a TRUE friend I think you should stick with her and most important stick up for her. People are always trying to hurt someone. I think the most respected posters and clients with know the difference. Good Luck!

Niceman2c

My first impulse is you were afraid of what might be true about your friend. Despite what you truly believed there was suddenly a big doubt planted in your mind. Since this could hurt you (and self preservation is an issue here lol) it is a very natural reaction in my view Sweetie. Please dont beat yourself up over it. I looked at your web site. Its very impressive to me .It portrays a very intelligent and sensitive person which is the real you. Give it another chance if she and you are willing.

Purelust3941 reads

the time; we want to believe in you ladies when you tell us you're our friend, you like us, etc, BUT there is always that little bit of doubt. Why the doubt? Easy. We know that providers have an incentive to lie to us, and that SOME providers (10%? 20%? 90%??) will try to take advantage of us. Your reaction was the same; I trust her......BUT. You acted instinctively to protect yourself. Bottom line: You will never be 100% sure you are doing the right thing regardless of your choice. Hey, your first instinct may turn out to be correct. Team up with her and get burned, and you will be kicking yourself for not following that instinct. Leave yourself vulnerable in this profession (applies to BOTH provider and hobbiest), and eventually you WILL get burned. Just a fact of life. Sorry you legit providers have to deal with the stigma caused by the others, but that too is just a fact of life.

I think if she is a good and decent friend she will understand.  This is a business and jealousy/wrong all play a part here!

b u d d h a3594 reads

My dear,

In any business ... perception, image, and reputation are keys to success. What images formulate in your mind when you think of shopping at a boutique store on Rodeo Drive?  Now, what images come to mind when shopping at K-Mart?

If your friend has created a BAD perception, image and reputation for herself, that may become a hurdle to overcome (NOT impossible).  Both, hobbyist and providers alike might conjecture that the two of you are peas from the same pod.

In this business, reputation and image counts.  I would encourage you to maintain yours.  Ugly rumors, or misperceptions can be very damaging.  

Just my 2 cents.

- Buddha  

[PS:  You still can be friends.  Being friends, and doing business together are two different and distinct things.]

-- Modified on 6/18/2002 2:01:30 PM

Poon Over Miami3849 reads

You personally have a very good rep, and your website is nicely done. I can only try to project the reaction of a typical hobbyist if he sees you teaming up with someone about whom he has heard bad things. Guys do gossip, read a few boards, and rely upon unfounded double hearsay all the time.

Personally, I have declined seeing a few providers who were traveling with someone I was not too fond of. It's time, money, and guilt by association, even if groundless rumors are involved.
Who has time or need to ivestigate when so many providers are available, like 200 on Eros every day.

In my case, this may have been unfair to the person who lost a date, and she lost so many because of the association that she has never come back to DC. It would not have bothered me if she had simply been in DC with that person, but teaming up and working with her sounded very different, increased the likelihood of cross-contamination of values. The probs with her friend were rush job, telephonitis, smoking, transparent insincerity, inadequate rocket science, non-GFE, etc, but she is a successful $$$$ visitor because too few guys search her reviews. The probs are contagious to a newby learning the ropes however, which was that case.
Are so many guys into doubles anyhow?

I would always give your friend the benefit of the doubt, especially if you know her well. When most everything written about your friend is positive, and you know her to be honest, I would take anything that I read & hear with more than a grain of salt. Everyone knows your reputation & it will survive bad reviews, deserved or not. You can always post it again.

Blue Thrills4374 reads

I think drojek makes a good point.

Buddha and drojek both make fine points that I would consider  if in your place.  Even though rumors/gossip/reviews are nothing more than words from other people that may or may not hold much truth, they could mean a great deal to some, especially in business.

Dyvine

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