I'm 32.. married, healthy, normal. 90% of the time, maybe 95%, I get hard with no problem what-so-ever when with my wife.  
I can ALWAYS get hard when with a provider, because I think I'm getting off on the excitement of being naughty and "bad".
But sometimes with my wife, I just find I can't get going.. then I get a mind-set about it, which only makes it worse, because then we start another time and I get thinking abuot "what if it happens again" and sure enough, it disappears - the thing is, I have complete 100% sensation - in fact I can almost cum with her touching it, just can't get hard.
As most women do, she takes it very personally and is insulted, which of course only makes things worse..I've tried to explain to her that they're not machines - but then eventually we do it and I get one 'under my belt' and everything is fine for the next several weeks..
I was thinking of getting some viagra for these times just to solve the problem.. I'm only afraid of 2 things: 1, that I'm too young at 32, and 2, that I'll get "hooked" psychologically - I know it's not cocaine, but I mean, I don't want to think I need it everytime when I know I don't - it'd probably only be a couple or three times a year that it were necessary -
Thoughts, anyone??
Thanks

In order for any of the ED drugs to work, you have to be mentally stimulated. Everything has to be psychologically ok. They don't automatically produce a result just by taking it. That means that if something contradictory is going on in your head, you may not get what you want anyway. Get your thinking back in order and be happy for the 95% of the time. When you get older it might not be that high.

If it can stiffen the collar of your shirt, it should certaily stiffen your johny

ED affects many men for a variety of physical reasons.  Idiopathic hypertension can strike even at a young age.  The medication required to treat the condition often causes ED as a side-effect.  A person who has suffered from juvenile diabetes can also suffer with ED at an earlier than expected age due to complications from the disease.  However, a medical condition does not seem to be the problem in your case.  And you're right, taking Viagra when it is not medically indicated is probably not a good idea as it affects blood pressure and blood flow.

Try to relax.  I know that's difficult, but tension does make things worse.  As far as wifey's reaction, try talking about the problem with your physician and see if he/she would be willing to include your wife in on the conversation.  Perhaps hearing that occasional failure is perfectly normal from a medical professional will help to alieviate some of her feelings.  Her feelings are probably a result of being taught that men only get hard-ons when they're turned-on and if they don't get one it's because they're not excited.  It is completely not understanding how the male body functions.  Honestly, a little couples therapy about this might help.

Started taking it three years ago when I was 59.  Has made me permanently thicker; was slightly thick to start with.  Have to use Magnums now.  Talk to your physician first.  Are some reports of eye damage/blindness.

Can you recruit her to try some interesting fetish stuff?

Sounds like the old routine where husbands and wives get into a rut.

Good luck on this.

...is the day the hobby dies.  Long live the hobby.  I feel pretty safe making that statement.

Without knowing your blood pressure, weight and height and some other indicators such as cholesterol levels etc. it would be impossible to provide meaningful comments on this.

I suspect that something else may be going on - and a chat with a physician is in order.  However, unlike Mary - I would offer that first you may wish to talk with the physician alone -

Good luck.

-- Modified on 8/4/2007 5:07:12 PM

It could be a little of both... In any event, you should consult with a doctor before trying any ED medication. If it is physical at your age it could be an indicator of adult onset diabetes, heart problems, BP or kidney problems etc.

I didn't mean that he shouldn't talk to his MD alone first.  The physician might decline to even discuss matter with his wife.  Some physicians are better at counseling on such matters than others.  Others would just make a referral for counseling.  It was just a suggestion that, if the physcian was willing, might help her better understand the physical aspects of a man's body.

Had a 20 something female friend who's boyfriend was a young MD.  He and his buddies would pop the big V when out drinking with the ladies so that they could perform better when they got back to their apt.  They did it so why not you?  She told me this and basically encouraged me to try it (damn, I wish it was with her).

Don't waste them with your escort, though tempting.
If you are worried about habituation or addiction tell your wife you want to use one of these meds if they have a problem. You may have to take a 30 minute time out (you can have great foreplay while waiting for an ED med to come on.
  For where you are right now this next advice will be difficult, but try to develop a sense of humor over it. Give your wife permission to laugh to reduce the tension in bed. Sometimes I will look at my lady and say something like"I told you the little fascist was being pissy today" Some couples name their privates with funny names and find that easier to talk about. John Henry and Neffertitie. She can communicate that Neffertitie isn't feeling well.
 I am about twice your age and have these issues much more frequently and I have never liked it yet. But handling it with humor can make it easier to talk about it both in and out of bed.
 My only advice is to not take any of this stuff without getting a check up from your doc as well.
 The suggestions for couples work is also a good one.
 Sure hope this works out for you. Good luck
Beret

1.  V makes sense to counteract booze even if you're young.

2.  Next time you're having sex with you're wife, run a movie in your head of the wildest escort sex you ever had, and see what happens to johnny.

I think I need d-viagra. My libdo is like an 18 year old.