If my wife gets a STD and accuses me of cheating, should I admit to it?  Odds of her having done it and using it as an excuse for divorce are extremely small I believe.

trying to blame you. I would probably not have posted about it being if she is on to you, she may have already installed spyware on your pc and she is among us lol. Don't ever underestimate a woman who wants to find out if her man is cheating babe...far from the naive creatures most guys assume we are when it comes to that. Most of us simply let you tie your own rope before we say a word.

So I guess your alibi didn't work as planned after all. I hope you followed my advice earlier and found a good divorce attorney.

Your best bet is to come clean and be truthful if you are sworn in and testifying in court. If you are caught committing perjury (i.e. lying on the stand), you WILL lose much more than just 50% of your assets to your wife.

It's too late for that. He has already posted a thread about the alibis he created to cheat on his wife with paid escorts. Any private investigator worth his/her salt has already recorded that information for future use in divorce proceedings.

Tell her that maybe you caught in the public bathroom. Tell her that you sometimes don't use layer of sheets when using the toilet in public bathrooms and maybe you caught STD from that. Apparently it can happen...

Actually, this was in one of the episode of House. Try this.

Oh and the ending was a happy one.

-- Modified on 5/11/2012 9:59:19 AM

eom

There are a couple of STD's that a woman can get without sexual interaction but the man can only get by having sex.

you could try the "dirty bathroom" excuse but depending on the std that might not work.

Hey Squeezy,

If you're that paranoid about getting STD, then get out of the hobbying business.

That way... you'll NEVER have to worry about your wife accusing you of cheating.

That's the OTHER strategy.

Serpius

I'm partial to the Seinfeld "tractor" story myself.

If your wife gets an STD are YOU the one who gave it to her? If you are the one who gave it to her. How the hell did you get it? Are you doing BBFS? If you are. Why? Then are you getting tested regularly? If your not doing BBFS and your clean then just where is she get going to get the STD? If she does get an STD and is NOT cheating herself, then you're already busted. There are more questions that opens an even bigger can of worms, but that comes later.

Don't know why you guys are jumping on squeezy for asking the question. I'm not sure how you can hobby and not think about this from time to time. It's good to have a response/strategy in place if this ever becomes a reality. One would hope that if the day comes when an STD is passed on to the wife, that there is an explanation that holds water...even if it's just a drop of water. Is it possible, that unbeknownst to you, you had an STD laying dormant in your system from your college days?
Please share any plausible explanations, as I'd like to file a few of them just in case.

END OF MESSAGE

And in men symptoms are rare . Have you played with a sick kitty lately? Have you had unprotected sex?

.......you mistakenly dipped your dick in a public toilet bowl and you think you might have caught something.

If it is or becomes a current issue, purge all your computers, trash the hobby phone, replace the GPS, get off the F*ck boards.  I hope you've been half way decent about covering your tracks.  You may have to admit in court under penality of purgury...  however there's no point in providing a detailed history.  Something about self incrimination.  
H

1) I have no STD that I know of.  I always wear condoms, no bbfs except with the wife.  It's true that I will Daty and swallow, but I don't do that to the Mrs.  And I get bbbj's.  I have no symptoms of any kind, but that can happen with at least Chlamydia I understand, maybe others.

2) there is no documented STD on the wife yet.  She's going to the doctor soon so I'm a little worried.  At the moment the issue is a vaginitis not responding to prescription yeast meds.

3) the 'I got it from a bathroom' idea is pretty lame.

4) I should have used an alias so that geniuses like MSH wouldn't spew their assumptive BS at me.

5) I agree at the moment not to admit.  Even if she says 'Just tell me the truth and we can work on it.  But if you won't admit it then get out and get a lawyer."

The OP just confirmed that this is NOT a hypothetical issue.

Based on your comment, I genuinely feel sorry for your wife and she has my sympathies. I hope HER medical exams come back clean, NOT for your piece of mind, but for HER personal health and well-being. She deserves so much better than this from a husband.

Interestingly, I'd say any woman stupid enough to get into any kind of long term commitment with you deserves whatever she gets.  Do us all a favor and zip it.

Any woman who gets into a long-term commitment with me knows that she can trust me NOT to engage in adulterous behavior. Sadly, YOUR wife cannot say the same.

I have too much respect for women to EVER cheat on her, no matter what the circumstances are. I would divorce a wife or break up with a girlfriend first rather than subject her to such disrespect.

I don't know if someone has already suggested this but get yourself tested, full panel, asap.  Either of you could have harbored some forms of STD's for awhile and not be symptomatic.  If you come out clean then your options for denial are a lot better.

That's easy. I do NOT hobby when I'm in a long-term relationship and would NEVER hobby if I am married.

To have the audacity to keep spewing your absolute gutter trash on here and point out another members "faults" on a fuck board nonetheless....

Stop harassing the TER members and go and get a job that doesn't involve anything more complex than putting those fries in the bag.

You are so far off on nearly every topic, and sadly you have NO clue why!

You would divorce her before engaging in anything infidelitous.  How noble of you.  Easier said than done.  And you would know that if you actually were in that scenario, like the overwhelming majority of men in this hobby are.  And in any case I'd doubt any woman would be desperate enough to get into any kind of relationship with you.  I repeat my previous request: do us all a favor and STFU.

END OF MESSAGE

screened every 3 months would prevent you from not knowing if it was in fact you thatg ave her it as well. and prevent the scenario from ever happening.

The OP did NOT confirm that this was a true issue.  Read it again Einstein.  It says the wife has vaginitis (that means inflammation of the vagina) which can occur from a variety of sources, not just STD's oh intelligent one.  Again, there is no confirmed STD.  So yes, the OP is at this time posing a hypothetical situation.

I believe Abraham Lincoln once said: "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt".  I suggest you commit that lesson to heart and follow it to the letter MSH.

has a yeast infection....& now the meds aren't working, so it May be a STD.

That's my guest.

If it isn't, just throw that back at her, accuse her of cheating & contacting a STD....but never admit anything...deny, deny, deny.

Deny till you die.

Being noble has nothing do do about not cheating on one's spouse. Like I said, it's all about respect. I respect any woman that I'm in a long-term relationship with or married to. You obviously do not.

If you really respected your wife, you would not cheat on her. Yes, it really is that simple.

...you are unsure during that 3 month period between tests.  Also getting tested takes time during normal hours which for me in particular is a big issue.  And functioning daily in close proximity to my wife the way I do would be very damning if an elbow bruise from a misplaced needle stick were noticed.  I would love to though.  Unfortunately I probably won't unless her results come back + and I am forced to to maybe clear my name.

Seems as if I've struck a nerve with some on here. You're not married by any chance, are you?

END OF MESSAGE

LMAO!!!

is that no matter how hard folks try and look beyond your narcissism and misogyny you continue to show even more disdain for the entire human race.

Now you want to attack married folks...and clearly you have NO scruples whatsoever.

But you obviously have a need to be on TER and consort with "paid escorts"...but somehow you feel that YOU are a noble sort..and for what reason?  Curious...what other "illegal" activities do you do?  


Nope..you are the laughing stock of TER.  You at least bring a smile to my face when I see your posts, and from others I discuss this world of ours feel similarly.  

So hopefully you'll continue your drivel and show the world that not everyone hates their lives.  Just folks like YOU !!

And if you're a good boy I'll put in a good word for you with the sponsors here.  And they'll get you a new orange belt to wear...one that glows in the dark...as that dark cloud over you must be a bummer.

Now, I once had a doctor tell me that I had to abstain from sex with my husband until a yeast infection was cleared up.  He told me that I could pass it to him, and then once I was cured then hubby could have caught it and passed it back to me so maybe that is the issue and hopefully it's not an STD?

i would deny everything.  the truth is, that just about every std out there may or may not show symptoms.  they may or may not rear their ugly heads ever, even.  they could just lie dormant and never do shit.  there really is no way to tell if you or she has just contracted it or if one of you had it before you met.  

deny deny deny

Please go to Quest Labs or any lab and get tested.

Chlamydia and Gonorrhea can be tested through urine sample (vaginitis, BV have to be tested with culture in women). If you're going to see providers and you're married, it's in your best interest to get tested.

I set up online appointment and go get blood work and give urine sample every 3 months.

While (yes, even on this board) we each have our own moral and/or ethical standards, and you are perfectly entitled to have different ones from Squeezy, and mine may be different from each of yours, i really think that being publically condemning and morally judgmental is usually out of place on this board.  Raping children or something outlandish  ?  Go get him.  But to be holier than thou about something like this, MSH?  

A married guy who sees providers and is inclined to lie about when caught?  Posting on this board?  How shameful!

And he dares seek advice from us?

I think I'm going to stop feeding the trolls like MSH.  They thrive on the interaction, even if negative.  They live to see their own speech in cyberspace and goad others to keep talking.  Some Freudian bullshit no doubt where his mother probably never listened to him.  Either that or he's a failed journalist.  In any case, ignore him.  And if we're lucky he'll shut up and go away.

You have sex with multiple partners and you do not test? Your wife may have something and you do not test? You engage in uncovered sexual acts with multiple partners (BBBJ providers, BBFS wife, BBBJ's are not safe at all, just safer than BBFS) and you do not test? You cheat on your wife yet you will not take any steps to protect her form your risky behavior, do you hate her? You engage in risk behavior yet you fail to test, do you hate yourself?

You are risking your health by not testing often, what is worse you are endangering others. I feel for your wife. It is plain you could give a damn about her. Your failure to test proves it. Here is a strategy get a lawyer and divorce your wife. It is plain you do not care at all for her well being given you will not even get yourself tested often so you don't get her an STD that you may have already given her.

Do the right thing and get tested. Bruises are easy to explain. Just say you hit against something. You are use to lying to your wife, do it for time to time to protect her when you get tested. You owe her that. I am not going after you for cheating, but for needlessly endangering every person you have sex with for not testing. Every person with multiple partners needs to test. You are a selfish man if you do not.

Yes I toned this down quite a bit so it will not get pulled.

Yep.  Pretty much right on the money.  I would take issue with the idea that I don't give a damn about her and that I might hate her or myself.  I don't.  Not in the least.  I have taken a calculated risk, much like a person who gets behind the wheel after 1 or 2 or more drinks with a 'slight bit' of tipsiness takes a risk with the law, and the life and safety of himself, his passenger(s) and all other drivers on the road at that time.  It is in no way right.  And I do agree with you.  If my marriage survives this scare (tests come back negative) I will get tested before the next provider, somehow.  Or certainly within 3 months of this result.

For the record, and this is not an excuse for MY irresponsible behavior, I highly doubt I'm the only hobbyist who doesn't test.  In fact I've heard from others who will remain nameless, that the majority of hobbyists don't get tested.  They monitor their symptoms which is of course FAR from perfect.

I'll finish by saying that it is awfully easy for you, Scoed and others, to tell me I should be doing this, given your situation of ease, compared with mine which is much more precarious.  But again you are right.  And somehow I will if my marriage survives this.  And if the marriage unfortunately doesn't survive this, then I will get tested promptly, and with much more ease.

Thanks for the appropriate tone.

... the reason remains the same why I entered in the first place: horny in a way that the wife can't/won't satisfy.  And I like being married for a variety of reasons.  The sex is a minor but nonetheless important part of my life.  And don't forget, the majority of hobbyists (whether they contribute to these boards or not) are just like me.