I understand that TER doesn't approve reviews in which the provider is a no show, but there seem to be a growing prevalence of flakiness among independent providers, and there need to be a way to check them on that issue. If they don't want to treat their profession like a real business, that's their loss, but when other people's precious time becomes involved, they need to be marked as a no show in the event that she flakes out on you, not only so that she may adjust her tardiness, but also that other hobbyists can be forewarned not to waste time on that particular provider. The time I wasted waiting on this no show thinking that she was actually serious about seeing me, I could've seen someone more reliable. Never allow someone to feel comfortable taking your time and patronage for granted, and the best way to make them uncomfortable is to call them out on it.

For now, you can report this on your local board, if you think that will help.

And name the provider that was NS. Howeve, be prepared to do it using your handle. Using an alias is too easy 😏

END OF MESSAGE

TER providers already have their reviews linked to their handle and TER reviewer have both their reviews and their Whitelists linked to their handle. Why not add a list of NCNS reports to both the guys and the gals alike?

 As a provider if you want your reviews to be shown, you have to allow any NCNS reports you have also to be shown. On the guys side, if you want your Whitelists to be shown, so too must you allow any times you have flaked on a provider to be shown as well.

What could be more fair than that?

BTW, I HATE NCNS and I have NEVER done it to a provider. Yes, I have cancelled, life happens some times, but I have NEVER pulled a NCNS.

The closest I came to being an NCNS was when I arrived near the Manhattan location early and called her number (provided in email a few days earlier). No answer. No answer. No working voice mail. Kept trying.  

A few blocks away, I found a Kinkos or a Staples with work-station rentals (more common then, before the spread of free wifi) and sent her emails explaining that I was there, not an NCNS, ... please send me an email or call my number ASAP ... . No reply.  

After about ~45 minutes, I was leaving the area, quite disappointed, and she called me. It turns out that she had changed her cell phone service and phone number (companies made it more difficult to port numbers back then) and forgot to tell me about the new number.  

We agreed to a late start. I hustled back several blocks to her hotel and things went OK. I had a very good time, but she seemed a little cold, as if the screw up was my fault. But I'd love to see her again, if schedules match up, and she doesn't change phone numbers!

If I hadn't been e-mailing her right then (meeting time + 15 minutes) to "prove" that I was there but instead waiting until that night to email ("I was there. Where were you?") I might have been falsely accused of NCNS.  

Also, to me, there is a difference between a rude, inexcusable NCNS and an excusable NCNS that she explains and apologizes for later by email, text or voice.  Yes, it was an NCNS but she made it up to me, big time. That NCNS should come off the list.

I would offer that there be a "cool down" period so that the guilty party has time to make contact. Perhaps part of the NCNS post must include date of incident, then a mandated 2, 3 or 5 day (or more) before posting about it. Would that work? Now if someone wants to abuse the forum and post vindictive or false claims it could indeed get messy. But you run that risk on every forum..

Here's an idea, clients are allowed to either show or to hide their Whitelists, Providers can choose to either have reviews here or delist.  

How about a "take the good with the bad" system. For the clents, If they want their whitelists to show, you have to have your NCNS list show as well. For the providers, if you want to be a "TER reviewed" provider, you have to allow your NCNS list to show as well. Fair is fair, right?

I would love that in a more formal way for the gents too!  We have other venues for that but you have to do your homework.

First, if a monger NCNSes providers, how likely do you think it is that he has whitelists?  

Second, a monger can participate in every benefit of TER without having, or showing, whitelists--except whitelists. So allowing them to choose not not show their NCNSes with the penalty being not showing their whitelists isn't much penalty at all.  

OTOH, not being able to show reviews here is a BFD for most providers.  

So the upshot of your system is, we'd see NCNSes by providers but not mongers.  

I don't think there's a good way to avoid abuse of an NCNS system. Thus I prefer to leave things as they are today, with NCNSes called out on local boards.  At least then the one charged with NCNS has the chance to give his/her side of the story.  

I agree, both sides need to be held accountable. I think it's odd that TER won't allow a NCNS to be posted, but they allow and encourage fake or embellished reviews. (Free VIP just for 2 reviews) I think there should be some way to set up or request appts via TER, and THEN be allowed to review, whether she honored her appt or not. Kinda like getting "oks". It would make this site and the reviews a bit more legitimate. IMHO. I would never consider a NCNS...that's just rude, unprofessional and bad for business.( I tend to think people who NCNS/time wasters have some serious mental challenges)

I didn't even read ur whole post cause y you want a genuine experience but u want to complain did you ever stop to think it was you...... me personally if I'm not comfortable I'm not seeing you period I have faithful clients by mess wit bs eom

If you have nothing good to say, don't say anything. You have not contributed anything to this forum, and what you said doesn't add up, not to mention there being holes in your argument. How she gonna feel uncomfortable with me if she hasn't even met me yet? And how come the other girls haven't complained? You obviously didn't put much thought into what you'd previously written, and you're gonna have to come better than that.