I’m a new kid on the block here, with no prior posts of any consequence, and nary a review either, so maybe I shouldn’t ask. But I’m wondering how you all reenter “reality” after a special encounter. I guess this is one of those fantasy vs. reality kind of threads, but with a twist. I feel I could use some advice.

I became active in the hobby only a few months ago, more out of a sense of adventure and curiosity than anything else, but also because it’s been quite a while since I enjoyed the sparkling presence of a girl barely out of her teens. And so I did my homework, chose carefully, and, frankly, had a bit of beginner’s luck, which has allowed me to meet several really wonderful ladies. I’m strictly a GFE kind of guy, and I never schedule an encounter for less than 2 hours. All of these adventures have left me happy but largely non-functional in the real world for at least the following day. Dreaming…

And then I met her…  From the first minute, it was magic. After her, I cancelled all my other playtime dates, and have not seen anyone else since. We see each other regularly at my place, generally for an entire afternoon or evening. But damn it is hard to function after our times together.

None of this has affected my “real” life, which is full and satisfying, so it’s not really a “Get a grip” message that I require, but I’m wondering. Should I be more careful? At the moment I like the fact that she’s obliterated any urge towards exploration and variety, but still… I feel that I’m either incredibly lucky or very foolish. I can’t tell which.

TIA.

BoyRacer

who is the provider?

Tread carefully.

Of course you should be careful. We talk about the hobby world and the "real world" but the same emotions are with us all the time. If you do not desire to bring this young lady into your "real world" you obviously need to cool it. We all become infatuated from time to time and it is much too dangerous to feed it.
Many hobbiest and mongers (traveling hobbiests) have a rule to never see the same girl more than twice. That may be a little drastic but seeing the same lady on several consecutive dates requires a lot of maturity to not become emotionally involved.
What you are talking about here is moving this relationship outside the hobby arena and into a personal relationship that could become dangerous to both of you.  
I know you are having a ball now, I hope you can work through it. Good luck, TK

Of what?

The only thing you need to be careful of is keeping your checkbook ballenced. If you can afford regular dates with a ladie who turns your crank, I don't see the downside.


But consider: If you continue to escalate the relationship, she may become dependent on you as a source of income. When your cash runs out, prepare to be dumped like hot lead.

...ya only live once, right?  Just be ready to crash and burn, not sayin' it will happen, but I'm still feelin' the sore spot left by an ATF who moved away long ago....a first step to recovery and reality might be divulging the name of this lady.....dare ya.....

of the provider to anyone.  he wants to monopolize her time and have her all to himself.

TO BYRCR26/BoyRacer: Take TK's advice, he is a pro and has been on this and other boards for a long time.  Also, try posting this kinda of topic on the national board, you will get many more responses.  My 2 cents to you is to tread lightly and remember this is a business for her and fantasy for you.  That is how I approach it at lease.

Good Luck,
GG

I also urge caution. One can easily lose control of the situation when one becomes infatuated with a Provider.  In my opinion you need to regain balance in this hobby by start seeing other Providers or stop seeing this particular Provider.  No Provider is irreplaceable and the next one may even be better!  It may also be helpful to remember the reality of the situation that you are probably not that special to this Provider and she is seeing many other hobbyists and very likely she has a SO. Finally, your statement “But damn it is hard to function after our times together” belies your claim “None of this has affected my “real” life”.  Sorry to be a pessimist but I learn this lesson the hard way and hope you don’t.

... it has been useful. Some difference of opinion in this small sample but a pretty uniform message of caution. Special thanks to Tom Kat and jadiegirl, whose advice was most thought-provoking, and much appreciated. I shall try to seek a better balance, I shall continue to see the special lady, but not so intensely, and I shall tell her why when (not if) she asks. Honesty in all things, I believe, is the best path. And, no, I shall never tell...

But it does occur to me that there is another lady that I had been dying to meet...

BoyRacer

-- Modified on 8/2/2004 5:28:59 PM