Jeez, there have been some interesting and fun threads on the boards lately but it also seems like there has been a lot of negativity directed towards some of our favorite local ladies.  C'mon folks!  We aren't just these strings of words we type across the screen.  We're human.

Some solace is that it's true that even negative attention can be great for business.  On the other hand it hurts and probably just makes us even more paranoid.

I just want to thank you providers who speak out for the rest of us over and over despite the flack you take.  Thank You.  Thank You.  Jenny, Sedona, Elise, you all come to mind. You have provided me with tons of helpful information either directly or indirectly and I do really appreciate it.
LJ

Not only do I have several requests for first time dates with all of the appropriate information and no inappropriate wording,  The sweet regulars, two second dates, a third date, and a fourth date all inquired about when we would be able to make some time... Confirmation that I've done something right.

(I also learned NEVER bring kama sutra oil to a date SORRY.. NOW THAT's a FLAKEY thing to do.. spill on a guy's couch.  GEEZ... Thank goodness there isn't an SO involved.. WHOOOPS! What a sweetheart for not freaking out and even being super generous!)

It's kind of nice actually, certain guys are screening themselves OUT of the mix, and I learned a valuable lesson this week.  Learning is a good thing!

I've heard all great things about you, too, LilyJune so thanks for starting a nice thread.  Miss Jenni and Miss Sedona, and YOU Miss Paige and  Sunny Kali!!! I've been hearing great things about all of you  nevermind Summertyme and Barbiluv.... Not that guys ever "Pillow talk"  *wink*

And never forget that darling  sometimes local Jai. What a HOTTI!  I know there's a bunch I didn't name I could go on and on.  

Makes me want to rethink my "no reference" policy!

xoxoxo
Elise

LJ, may I highjack your thread?

Negative threads are one thing.  At least ladies can respond...  

What about the ROTTEN reviews some really fine ladies are being slammed with?  Several really great ladies have gotten low numbers and mean-spirited narratives, yet they cannot reply, explain, differ, enlighten, argue, etc. with the review.

I don't want to mention their names, but think of the 10 BEST ladies in town and you'll know who I mean.  One can't fault TER - it is what it is, a review board not a debating society.

So the fault lies with us, the customers.  I suppose I'm rambling, so let me just say this: Guys, before you give a gal a 4 for looks or a 5 for performance after one date, think for a moment about how she's going to feel.  Get a dictionary and look up "compassion".  Think also about the ladies' total inability to respond to your one-sided critique.  Remember too that it's up there for posterity, for all to see as long as TER and free speech exist.  Most of all, recognize that common sense always precludes advance discussion of the particulars of the activities we may want during that first session.  This mandatory, abbreviated communication means we must moderate our expectations and tolerate a certain amount of uncertainty.  

The "unknown" is an inherent aspect of the hobby, especially on session number one.  Disappointment is a REAL possibility in every first-time encounter.  None of that, GENTLEMEN, warrants slamming a high class, high quality, highly reviewed lady with a bad review, IMHO.  

An acceptable tack is no review at all – just write it off to bad chemistry and keep it to yourself.  A really high-class approach from a true gentleman would be to see her a couple more times, get some perspective on that first experience, and THEN write a mature, wise, fair and balanced review.

Does this make sense?

Pointless - I understand your point, however, here are a couple other things to consider.  I have been a PAYING member of TER for several years.  I have no reviews for reasons I have stated a number of times.  

I definitely agree with the negative thread working both ways.  The ladies do have a chance to respond.  I think if you look at some of the threads by the ladies, they have an indignant tone to them.  It seems like if you don't agree with them or you give an honest review, you are "OUT OF THE MIX" OR "Weeded yourself out" as Elise said in one of her posts.  What is "Out of the mix"?  Does that mean out of the club?

Also, reviews are very subjective.  It may be that Jenni is a top provider in San Diego.  It doesn't preclude her from having a bad day.  Even Barry Bonds strikes out or messes up a play.  Just because he's a top player, it doesn't ENTITLE him to a great review on his bad days.  I've read the defense of the bad review - "She must not have been that bad if he wanted a second cup".  Well, it was what it was.  In the reviewers defense - Maybe he just wanted a second cup and Jenni was there.  I don't know - I wasn't there.  Who cares.  Jenni, just like every provider is subject to bad reviews.

Bottom line - This is America. We are all entitled to our opinions.  We don't have to agree with the popular providers - though we definitely know the consequences - Being "Out of the mix".

responding to "Pointless's" post, A very few hobbiests will rate someone way out of line with the provider's post history.  Discerning hobbiests will spot these for what they are: an aberation or 'just a bad day'( on either party's part). Just as glaringly obvious is the 9's and 10's given out for historically average service.  It cut's both ways.  No one seems to complain about hi ratings.  They're only apparent when a hobbiest visits and can't duplicate the findings.

Terrific post, thank you.

I think, too, that most of us ladies appreciate some feedback - before, during or after the appointment.

Before gets 'sticky' because of cautionary wording.
No two men are the same, nor are their preferences, so feedback during is really HELPFUL and WELCOMED (we aren't mindreaders!). And, since most of us really want to have a good reputation and provide a good service, we would welcome your mature, tactful comments. We all VALUE our repeat clientele, so if there was something 'missing', something not quite to your satisifaction, let us know!
The review of Jenni shows either complete meanness, or cowardice. Why act like you are having the time of your life only to then post a bad review? Speak up! We aim to PLEASE!

I'm glad I'm not a celebrity! Whew! Who would want to be Martha Stewart or John Kerry right now? Ok, maybe in some ways..

Yeah, when you're somewhat of a 'voice', you'll win some and lose some. I can think of one poster that I wish wouldn't so often assume so wrongly of me! Hey, take me out sometime and at least get to know me!

To know me is to love me...
LOL!

I recall that line from "Cool Hand Luke", about the 'failure to communicate.' Although one may not have the excellent communication skills of Sedona, one does have an obligation to express yourself as to your desires and intentions. It is a two way street.

I simply can't understand why a man seeking the kind attentions of a woman would not act like a gentleman. What happened to respect for one another?

It seems to me that you should treat any provider (whether new or an ATF) with respect that equals that of any new person you might meet in the civilian world.

Provide the appropriate screening info, then when you meet be kind and gracious, have fun, tip her well then go about your day.

If she or the meeting doesn't equal your expectation, move on but do so quietly. Hobbyists bear some responsibility in insuring a great time is had by all, just start by being gracious showing respect and kindness.

Yes speak up... And dont write a crappy review because you wanted to do something that I construed as risky. And dont say  "you really dont want to do this since this is how I earn my living but".... and then go on and not even accurately relate what happened. THe point of a review as I see it, is to let people know about the provider. Now if she has a bunch of reviews that are mainly good and she didnt do anything to you like throw vases at you then geez loweez just write it off. Or better yet, let her know, and I am sure most of us would try to work something out for another try. In the case of my crappy reviews I know they dont want another try and believe me I dont either. Not when I had no clue they were so miserable. If I had I woulda split my rate in half and left early so they could try and salvage the night with another date.  ANd believe me, there is one other road of recourse---you hit them with both barrels via pm or email and at least let off a little steam. As I did. AND hey guys---cat got your tongue..no reply?  Only want to do it on the public arena..well I wouldnt be caught dead in public with either of you... and brewster-class has very little to do with money...just so you know-----YOU AINT GOT NO CLASS (grammatically correct).

Fair points sir, well taken,.

pl

I'll just be frank: and the review of SexyStephie.  Total crap, according to her they hd a great session but regardless, why slam the lady?  I know you had it happen to you once, so I much appreciate you insight.  Thanks!

pl