to say this is all most men want to see waiting for them when they open the door after a hard day's work.  It's not too much to ask is it?

well, that sure would be nice.  At least on tuesdays.  I used to have a cat that would greet me at the door, chirping her hellos, you bastard, feed me now meows.  Was very endearing.  I missed it when she was no longer around.  At the time I was a bit worried, she was home alone all day, with little to do, while I was out and about.  Then, being the dude I am, I ignored her for long periods of time, my attentions being elsewhere.  And where was my other cat, the little black one?  Why didn't she greet me at the door too, insteado hiding behind the tv cabinet?  So many questions.  I guess I came to accept it all, especially when realizing that each cat had their favorite time and place to nail me down for affections.  The little black cat currently likes to run between my legs while I'm sitting down on my porcelin thrown in the mornings.  It's a bit annoying, especially without coffee; arg, but I appreciate that she's got a specific time where she knows I'm a sitting duck.  There's probably a point here, but yeah, if that lady has a sister, send her over.  Does she do windows too?  And if batteries are required, type and quantity too.  Good luck!  One for the office wouldn't be bad either.  And those long distance car trips.  Heck, I might have to get a life.  suck!

all I want is three things from my wife. I want her to feed me, fuck me, and SHUT THE FUCK UP!"