Guys,
I just wanted to let you all know that I won't be dancing for awhile because I have had my costumes stolen. If anyone hears of ladies with things for sale, please send them my way.
My other question is this...How would you all think it would be best to handle a guy that is continually trying to get me to do something I don't want to do. For instance, say he has terrible breath and I don't want to kiss him...should I just hold my nose?!

Just casually slide the scope in front of himLOL

well maybe when you meet have some breath mints like altoids out

col hogan

whether it be halitosis or the dreaded SBS "stinky ball syndrome" and its neighbouring cousin the "dingleberry" ... is to seduce him into the shower (in lieu of ordering him to take one on his own) or saying something like "i should rinse my mouth, i had onions earlier, etc ... here i'll pour you a cup too"  -- and so on

cuz one thing is for sure (judging from all we've been hearing) if you even insinuate that he's ANYTHING LESS than a purrfect adonis himslef, he will extract his revenge with a nasty review that says YOU smelled, or YOU did this, or YOU acted like you were on drugs, or whatever!  LOL

just saying is all, theoretical like!  

THanks singleton! It really stinks (couldn't resist) when someone offers a negative opnion over something small and it isn't always easy to figure out the best way to tactfully handle the situation. All of ya'll's advice has been extremely helpful, I thank you.
Since you've been so helpful, I have one last question...what do you guys think a girl should do when a guy tries to force the issue   i.e. keeps grabbing your head and pushing you towards the area you don't want to go?

I think singleton is right in saying not to "order" him to do something but if it's simply a case of poor hygiene, he may not be aware of it and beating around the bush or "hinting at it won't do any good. I think that approaching it in a tactful, "adult" manner will be fine. Just don't blurt out "damn, go wash you ass!" Ask him to take a shower/brush his teeth/whatever before hand and tell him that it's standard practice for you.......you like the guy to be clean. Don't make a federal case out of it and it will be fine.

Kiki,

  Sorry to hear your costumes were stolen.  It's a shame... were they stolen from a club?  Just a suggestion - you might want to keep an eye out on places like ebay to see if any of the items turn up for sale.

  As for the bad breath thing.  First off, you shouldn't have to do anything you don't want to do.  If you don't want to kiss a guy because he has bad breath, you don't have to.  

   You know the guy and we don't so you probably have a better idea of whether or not he can take a hint, or constructive criticism or whatever.

   A little story from my high school days: I never used deodorant in high school - didn't think I needed it.  As a junior, I started working in the theater with a group of Polish immigrants.  Very nice people - very polite.  Big tippers.  Anyway, after one very, very long day, the guy in charge came to me with my pay and tip for the day.  In addition to the cash, he handed me a small bottle of men's cologne, and walked away.  That was it.  I got the hint.

  The moral of the story is, sometimes it doesn't take anything but a kind gesture, and a subtle hint.

   Best of luck....

if he gets even the least bit aggressive or "violent",  that's where you must (IMHO) abandon any and all subtlety and give him a stern and blunt "hey mister" type feedback and do it right away (even if you have to point out the obvious offending facts to him) ... the more you hestitate and "yield ground" the more he will persist and "take ground" ... until the situation may become unmanageable

i can tell you plenty stories of providers who hesitated thinking that a mere body movement or mumbled nagging sound would clue in some asshole and stop him from continuing with rough stuff or forcing girls to do certain things

yes, it might work with some nicer guys (at least one hopes) but trust me it will NOT work with the sicko assholes (which frankly is the kind you need to worry about) ... and given this fact, you're better off risking the nicer guys getting a little miffed ("honey, all you had to do was pull my hand away or say something and i would've stopped", etc) but getting the point across to the assholes ... than the other way around, letting the nice guys get away with a little misbehaving BUT NOT BE ABLE TO STOP THE ASSHOLES!


from what i've been told by a multitude of girls in this business over the years, giving a mere proverbial inch to guys like that almost never is the right thing to do. you must let them know that zero inches is the margin they have to play by or else it's the door

 Speaking of subtlety, gee, I wonder who Kiki is talking about?

Kiki, how did your costumes get stolen??  Was it in the club??  I'd sue the club for failing to provide proper security especially if that was a clause in your contract & try to get some monetary compensation to help replace those costumes.  Do you travel with a roadie, BTW???

bummer about your costumes.  they have to have been custom made and there aren't bodies like yours made every day.  (thank goodness for me, or i'd be broke.)  i agree that you shouldn't do anything you don't want to.  if the guy has bad breath you can ask him nicely to correct it.  if he's asking you to go out to dinner (like me, for instance) you can politely decline.  if he's physically forcing you in a direction you don't want to go, tell him to stop or he'll have to leave.  if he doesn't stop then, call the cops.  you deserve as much respect as any woman.