Truly... if that's what you enjoy, by all means.. enjoy it. Its unfortunate we won't cross paths and you'll miss out on knowing an awesome woman. 
So a guy that has been contacting me for the last 2 weeks trying to coordinate schedules, wanting to piece mill payment over the next few weeks or months until he has accrued enough "credit" to see me, has just dropped a bomb on me. NOW he's saying that if we meet, it must be PSE, which to him, means we must be together like we are married - sans latex. :-/ Since when is that what a PSE mean? SMH. I'm growing increasingly shocked at the audacity of what I assume are newer hobbyists. I know to each his own and what I won't do another might... but at this moment I am disgusted completely at the insinuation and ashamed that this is where others are taking it.
...better set him straight. If he's a TER member, get him to read the definitions in the self help manual, too. Does he even know what PSE stands for? The main difficulty with these terms is, despite the definitions flying around, they mean different things to different people. Some providers use PSE as a code for offering anal. BUT. If he thinks it means you should act like you are married, what's the problem with that? Unless he asks you to do the dishes! (LOL)
you didn't see the "sans latex" part?
whoops! You are quite right! Never mind! "I think the vodka goggles I had on last might haqd something to do with it!
-- Modified on 1/23/2011 8:52:38 AM
To him... the "married" part meant sans latex. I guess he wants PSE to mean MSE. Either way... I think its stupid. Sucks for him... I'm obviously not the one for him.
You said "to each his own"...
PSE means different things to different people...
There are people who think BB is something that only the people employed in the adult industry can do...To that, i disagree 5 million %...
I spend more time and money on testing than most people do...The appts. i book are the business of me and the girls i see...
Truly... if that's what you enjoy, by all means.. enjoy it. Its unfortunate we won't cross paths and you'll miss out on knowing an awesome woman.
is that the session will go EXACTLY THE SAME AS IN THE FILMS THEY WATCH. Now, admittedly, not all films have bareback sex in them. But, a lot of them do. They also include things like bareback anal, ass to mouth, spitting, spanking, and a wide range of other activities. To some guys, this is what they want, and what they expect when they see "PSE" associated with a porn star escort.
On some sites, I've seen "PSE" used as code on ads from non-porn escorts to mean they will do bareback. On some ads I've seen "PSE available with tests" which makes it very clear what they are offering.
So, yes, to a lot of people, PSE means bareback.
FWIW, GFE doesn't mean the same thing to everyone either. I consider GFE to mean that things like DFK, DATY and BBBJ are available. However, in the last week, I've talked to several ladies who say they offer GFE on their ads or websites who don't do one or more of those things. For those escorts, GFE just means that they pretend to like you and not your money, I guess.. 
Unfortunately, no matter how many glossaries of terms are out there, no matter how many times terms are explained on boards like this, different people have different definitions and different expectations. And, in a hobby where you can't talk over the phone or in email to discuss expectations openly, it gets very frustrating for both parties and sometimes to bad reviews. That's one of the reasons why I consider open reviews to be very valuable and why I visit sites where I trust the reviews.
Good Point. For me PSE means she just like the movies and that's all. For me that means Anal, screws you hard like she couldn't wait to get at you and Cum in mouth. That's it. I don't get any crazier than that. But Mr French makes a good point. You can't discuss these things openly so there will likely be sevveral interpretations. For example: i always thought PSE meant she's like the movies. I didn't even think about the no condom deal. I would never do that anyway. Just not worth the risk.
When I was an escort, I never had anyone ask for PSE, but I was asked for GFE a lot.
Some people are just daft... or don't care about their ween. Or the girl's puss. Or my job. Or my co-workers. *shrugs.* I have a family to think about and a life partners. I'm not interested in those types of propositions with strangers with cash.
Agreed. I like your style.
Agreed, PSE always meant an experience that made you feel like you were in the video... and often included filming for private consumption. But never before the last couple of years have there been so many people asking for such risky BB meetings! Call me old fashioned, but I like knowing that I can walk away without a gift that keeps on giving.
Since it appears to not be the death sentence it was originally, people seem to think "no biggie".
Ironically, things like syphilis are picking up steam as people throw caution to the winds.
I can't blame anyone for not wanting to take that risk.
-- Modified on 1/23/2011 10:15:48 AM
I just don't understand the argument that BB is only for the likes of (insert male porn stars name here) and if a civilian does BB (AIM calls people not in industry "civilians") he doesn't care about his health....Well, that is BS...I have one folder full of AIM tests and another folder w/copies of every test not from AIM, included here would be STD tests from home as well as copies of every test not related to STD's ie; metabolic panels results, CBC's, etc...I take my health seriously..
I wouldn't necessarily interpret it so personally- or even in the general context of "hobbyists are diseased perverts compared to male talent in the porn industry".
A porn set during a shoot is a much different place than a hotel room with only four eyes present, it seems to me. The other problem (taking what you say about your approach to minimizing risk at face value) is that when it becomes widely known one sees civilians BB, one will inevitably going to get sneaky conniving bastards who might not be as conscientious as you are.
In the end, I'm not going to hammer on ladies on what they think they need as boundaries and limits that allow them to work in this industry AND see hobbyists. It isn't an easy industry to work in, on either side of the street. As long as they are clear about limits, services and the like, it's all good to me, and we as hobbyists can decide what works for us and what doesn't when we seek ladies out.
-- Modified on 1/23/2011 5:31:44 PM
I totally get a set is different from a private, i was just pointing out i take the testing routine serious...
Like you said in the 3rd. paragraph, both providers and clients alike are free to seek out the people best fit for them....
Agreed. And yet in some inner cities like New York and Washington DC, the rate of HIV infection is higher than in some parts of Africa including Nigeria & Rwanda. Its sad. Everytime there is an Patient Zero, I see posts on this board demanding to know who the infected party in order to "protect the hobby," yet these same people months, even days earlier might have inquired about the availability of BBFS prior to the incident of infection.
Ironically, things like syphilis are picking up steam as people throw caution to the winds.
I can't blame anyone for not wanting to take that risk.
-- Modified on 1/23/2011 10:15:48 AM
refund any money this clown has sent you on a piecemeal basis, less a modest aggravation fee. Tell him that any date sans latex is out of the question and he should take his PSE definition elsewhere.
Mr. French is 100% correct in his analysis of how differently hobbyists (and even providers) can interpret GFE/PSE.
By the way, what does SMH stand for?
Fortunately, I was smart enough to NOT let this guy send me any money. When we spoke of a deposit, he came up with this idea of wire transferring me money weekly until he could schedule in sometime in late February/ early March, instead of cashing in stocks to meet me. Flattering, but I don;t give me bank account info to just any shmoe that asks for it. :-/ Believe me, I did tell him that I was offended by his definition of PSE and gave him a lecture he won't soon forget. I am a nice girl, have been in the porn industry for 17 years, (18 next month,) have been inducted into 2 Hall of Fames - and yet have never been on a single quarantine list when there has been an incident of HIV in the industry. I don't plan on having sex with an untested partner without a condom anytime soon. Hell, even my life partner had to submit to an HIV test when we first started dating... just in case.
When I first became available publicly years ago, PSE meant that you felt like you were walking onto the movie set... complete with false lashes, stilettos, sexy clothing and yes, some dirtier performances. GFE meant you felt like you were with a girlfriend and not in the midst of a commercial transaction. It meant she'd kiss & she wasn't a clock watcher amongst other things. Veteran hobbyist like Vegas Bob, (who no longer posts here since he moved to Costa Rica where the girls are $20/ DAY, once referred to me as GFE & PSE. But BB just for the sake of someone else's good time or a few extra bucks? Not a part of the menu at my cafe.. Hopefully others will read this and take note before contacting me.
SMH = Shaking My Head btw (by the way.)
Mr. French is 100% correct in his analysis of how differently hobbyists (and even providers) can interpret GFE/PSE.
By the way, what does SMH stand for?
Take half his money, then tell him to jerk off in front of the computer and have a nice day at work!
Hi Sinnamon,
How lovely to see you on here. I've always admired your beauty and intelligence. So glad to see you are still here after all these years. You are such a lovely lady.
Sending you lots of hugs and Kisses,
Keisha
So good to see you here as well! Its good to see you back as well. You are an amazingly beautiful woman that can certainly teach these younger ladies a thing or two.
As you fancy yourself a Porn Star, I am surprised that you are surprised that clients would want to do everything that you do in your videos.
I am really not trying to criticize you - you can do whatever you want to do with your body! But why do you draw a difference between clients and your porn co-actors? I see no reason why a client could not provide the exact same test results that you would ask of your co-stars. In addition, I would think that in general, your clients have sex with many fewer girls, and unprotected sex with even fewer - probably only his wife! So the risk from your clients would be lower than from your porn co-stars, who I would expect live more of a wild life-style than the average client.
Please understand I don't watch much porn and have not seen your work. So if you are a condom-only porn star, then I really DO understand. But if like most porn out there you are condom-free, then I don't understand the difference between a client with the appropriate test results, and a male porn actor.
This is not directed at Pitt but rather all those that have similar points of view that a PS should treat hobbyists and co-workers alike.
I am amazed that some hobbyists don't get the fact that it is any providers (porn-star or not) right to chose what she will do and won't do. I know many non-porn providers who regularly have unprotected sex in real life but even with tests, would never consider seeing a hobbyist unprotected. You may disagree with the reasoning providers use for deciding on their boundaries but you don't need to understand them, they are her boundaries and her choice. With how easy a fake document can be made now, I don't blame providers for not trusting your test result.s Personally there are a few hobbyists that post such rants about this that I will never see anyone they have reviewed. Posting about your desire that all porn-stars have no right to limit services is idiocy. Also implying that you will only see PS that do BB damages business for the girls you review as some of us will cross her off our lists
Dude, I said that Sinnamon can do whatever she wants with her body, and I believe most hobbyists, even those who desire BB, would agree.
Her right to draw a line wherever she wants is not my question. I would like to know why porn is on one side of the line, and providing is on a different side of the line. Both involve strangers, both involve people you may not be attracted to, or even like at all. Both involve a certain amount of "acting" on the part of the girl.
I legitimately want to understand the reason - I don't have any desire to berate Sinnamon or anyone else.
The argument about possible faked test results is a red herring. Any argument about test results being "faked" can be applied directly to the porn industry as well. If Sinnamon (or any girl) is afraid of faked test results, then she would not do porn because those results could be faked. Hobbyists have access to the exact same testing facilities that porn actors do, so any porn girl could insist that hobbyists use the same labs (AIM for example) used by porn industry. I doubt that a fear of fake test results is at the root of the issue.
Responding to my posting, but then discussing things that other people said, make it appear that I said these things when I did not. Bad form. I never said porn stars have no right to insist on condoms, I never said I would only see BB providers.
I am amazed that some hobbyists don't get the fact that it is any providers (porn-star or not) right to chose what she will do and won't do. I know many non-porn providers who regularly have unprotected sex in real life but even with tests, would never consider seeing a hobbyist unprotected. You may disagree with the reasoning providers use for deciding on their boundaries but you don't need to understand them, they are her boundaries and her choice. With how easy a fake document can be made now, I don't blame providers for not trusting your test result.s Personally there are a few hobbyists that post such rants about this that I will never see anyone they have reviewed. Posting about your desire that all porn-stars have no right to limit services is idiocy. Also implying that you will only see PS that do BB damages business for the girls you review as some of us will cross her off our lists
As for tests being faked in the porn industry, AIM was founded after a male star Marc Wallace faked his test results in 1998 infecting 7 female stars. AIM has safe guards on their tests including watermarks and raised embossing to insure authenticity, AND test results of performers can be verified both online and by calling AIM for voice verification. As a client is not industry, his results are protected under HIPPA which means I nor anyone else can call in to request a confirmation that your results are current and in fact clean. Hope this clarifies this tidbit of information for you.
I've always said in this lifestyle both parties are free to do what they please...There is someone for everyone....A couple people i contacted on my own in past who were not compatible, we had a very civil and cordial exchange...There was no judgment or preaching from either of us...We realized it was best if we didn't meet so we just moved on...
The topic you brought up will always bring up strong feelings on both sides, but many times hyerbole, paranoia, and flat out BS takes over...Some think well if you get tested, its probably fake..Speaking for myself, that's BS...I get tested both from AIM and a world renown University Medical Center...There's not a God damn fake thing about it...Others think if you do BB, you must party like Artie Lange, and Keith Richards...Well, that's BS to...Personally my lifestyle is bland....I'm 200% drug free & I don't need anyone to lecture me on health...I STILL get teased today (20+ years later) from a friend when i drank root beer at a party while everyone else was boozing it up...
An old saying goes "you can please some of the people all the time, you can please all the people some of the time, but you CAN'T please all the people all the time"...You will always have naysayers, doubters, and people just love to pass judgment...That's the way it is...
And the end of the day, people in this lifestyle ALL are paying for compansionship....One has NO right to take some moral high ground...
Its not about taking the moral high ground for me. Its a bigger issue of insuring my own personal health and safety so that I don't have to look back someday and question my choices and decision making processes from my youth. For me, its about knowing that I will be able to work in this industry for as long as I chose because I love it... and not have to worry about my career being cut short as I take anti-retrovirals every day. Having been in the adult industry since 1993 I have seen a lot happen:
Alex Jordan was found hanging in her closet by a man's tie, ruled suicide but rumored in the industry to have been the accidental result of a submissive private call.
Cal Jammer and Savannah both committed suicide.
Marc Wallace, Jordan McKnight, Brooke Ashley, Tori Coco Flame, Darren James, Jessica Dee, Lara Roxx, Miss Aroyo, Tony Montana, Kimberly Jade, Barbara Doll and Trisha Deveraux all contracted HIV.
I have been fortunate enough through each HIV incident to have never been on a quarantine list. I'd like to keep it that way. This means limiting my sexual activities to people that "I know where they've been." This doesn't just include hobbyists, it means male and female porn stars as well. I politely informed a gentleman recently I could not have sex with him due to genital warts and have informed female talent I couldn't have sex with her because she had active herpes outbreak at the time. Its not that I think I'm better than you or anyone else... its that I have a family; children and a life partner and as much as I love my job and love have ridiculous amounts of orgasms doing it I have no desire to die for it.
I wish people would get off their high horses and realize that it isn't always about them... its about us too. Regardless of how much money you are paying the ladies involved.
If I'm not mistaken Cal Jammer was distraught over the break-up w/Jill Kelly and I remember seeing the "E" True Hollywood story on Savannah, and many of her problems were related to drugs...
We can agree to disagree on this topic...As i said previously, there is someone for everyone....
It doesn't matter why Cal and Savannah committed suicide. They were both people I knew and I've made decisions in my life and career based on things I've witnessed first hand during my almost 18 year career. Specifically, if you want to know... Savannah got into a horrible car accident which disfigured her nose & scarred her face- she was so upset and felt it destroyed her career and shot herself in the head. Drugs or no, she felt her world was collapsing and took her life.
The difference with my porn co-stars is that there are often several years of HIV & STD test result available that I can view online... and often I know a great deal about their personal history, dating experiences, any potential drug use and extra curricular activities that allow me to make a personal decision as to whether or not to perform with them or to add them to my "no list." In fact, I don't even work with new male performers that have less than 2 years in the adult industry... a privilege of almost 18 years in the adult industry. When a gentleman I've never met before, whom I have no knowledge of what their sexual proclivities and behaviors are. A test from AIM is only as good as the day your blood is drawn, meaning that a blood draw at 12 noon and having sex with someone that evening before your test results are back the following day truthfully invalidates the test. An AIM test doesn't assure you that you don't have HIV... it means you did not contract it in the last 30 day window.
Now, as for myself, these days I primarily tour with The Punany Poets, write a column for TheWellVersed.com, webcam and only rarely perform on film anymore. I still test frequently, but I pick and chose my partners and projects to insure that the fit with what I'm trying to do. Last year I performed in only 5 movies, something I am quite happy with. I turned down at least 10 shoots with upstart companies that have brand new male performers as I know nothing about them.
And as for the hobbyist that might only have sex with his wife outside of myself... I'd truly hope a hobbyist isn't having unprotected sex with a sex worker then going home to his wife and having unprotected sex with hr as well. :-/
Thank you for providing your insight and thoughts on this topic. You writings did help me to understand your decisions. Especially:
1. That civilians AIM tests are not handled the same as porn star tests.
2. The diligence you apply to when selecting possible porn partners. I didn't realize you had this much control in determining your partner in a scene. Knowing that you walk away from certain situations in porn, I can see why you would walk away from the similar thing when providing.
Thanks again for proving this clarity. I wish we could "pin" your response to the top of this thread, for the next time the topic arises.
You're welcome. Lots of time when this topic comes up, I think people automatically jump to the morality issue and assume that male porn stars are worse than civilians in that their sexual practices are more loose than that of a married guy seeing a porn star. The issue of finance annoys me as well - the idea that just because I'm being paid a high rate and therefore I should be willing to do whatever someone paying wants is ludicrous. I've had guys ask me if they could tie me up and book me as a submissive just because they have seen me perform for Kink.com. If we go with the same line of thinking as those that question the BBFS issue, I shouldn't have a problem with that either, right? What's the difference? Other than the reality that knots being tied to tightly for an extended period of time can cause irreversible nerve damage, or not being able to protect myself from someone I don't know that has me bound in private versus doing so on a set where there are lots of people and safe guards in place... Not to mention that many people who fantasize about BDSM and watch the videos may not have ever actually playing in real time before with a woman and may not consider that the reality of the limitations on the body vary nor may they possess the necessary skill to be able to perform such acts safely. But hey... since I do it on camera... I should offer it in sessions, right?
Yes, all talent has the ability to say yes or no to whom they may be booked in scenes with. It is after all, sex, at the end of the day. If companies wish to make a profit selling sex, they probably want to put together people with great chemistry that actually WANT to have sex with each other. You know what I find to be most hilarious in this issue?? I never hear anyone complain about adult stars like Sunny Lane & Mika Tan that exclusively offer services at The Bunny Ranch, a legal brothel in Nevada - where ALL sex is covered by LAW! Hopefully sex can become decriminalized here so that women don't feel pressured to do things that threaten their health due to the fear of a bad review or losing income.
thank you for saying what I've tried to put into words many times before but not nearly as well nor as clearly as you.
Sinnamon, I wasn't sure I understood you all along this thread until read this particular post, especially the last paragraph. That was a selfless, well thought out, frank and intelligent piece and even though I never met you ( I have made attempts) you've earned my respect for this intelligent thought process!