I had my first experience with a provide a couple of weeks ago . . . we didnt settle on the fee before we met, when I got there, she asked how long I wanted to be there and quoted a price. I had money already in an envelope, and I just left it on her desk. She never picked the envelope up in my presence, I assume she counted the money one of the times I was in the bathroom. That being said, I understand why the provider would count the money before anything went on, as this is, at bottom, a business transaction
Below in my opinion makes a porn escort have integrity which lately based on the posts has been lacking for some of the ladies...If I left anything out please add on to this..
1) If you are not feeling well (ie flu, cold) letting us know BEFORE you show up instead of showing up with a running nose or bad cough which increases us of getting sick..
2) If it is that time of month letting us know than having an awkward moment..Again it is cool when we are not paying for it but when a guy is paying a girl $300 and up per hour we do not want this..
3) Letting the guy know if you are pregnant..Yes I had to turn a lady away because of this..
4) If a lady requires a deposit than it should be no more than $100..And if the lady cancels than the money SHOULD be deposited WITHIN 24 hours.
5) If a lady puts on excess weight, or change hair color, cut hair, since the last session than she should let us know so that we can make an informed decision
6) NOT COUNTING THE MONEY in front of a repeat customer! For a first time it is better to count it in the bathroom..Counting the money kills the mood and it reminds us that we are a 'John'..
7) If the lady is running late calling us and giving us a heads up..Not just showing up late..That shows disrespect for our time and a lack of integrity
8) Giving a guy less in performance than before for no reason than just not feeling like it..For example DFK'ing on the first appointment and than the second one after paying and you are in the middle of the session and the guy goes for the DFK and you turn your head saying "I don't feel like kissing and last time I shouldn't of"..That should have been discussed before!
9) A guy sees you the first time for let's say $300 and than he calls you to see you again and you see him..After the session is done you count the money and say "Hey Baby my rate is now $400"..A woman with integrity would say that BEFORE we walk in the door..
Danny
and this should actually go for both PS's and Non PS's.
Its a simple form of respect and communication, and it should always come from BOTH sides of the coin on some of these examples.
Cheers
The counting money thing is interesting. I saw two PS, both for about $800, and they never counted. I found this very interesting, but thinking about it, they had asked me for references so I guess they didn't feel the need to count.
Just not in front of you and yes having references does help..
The worst one for counting is Nina Hartely..And I have told her over and over again to stop doing that..
Danny
I have no problem with a lady counting the donation in front of me. It does nothing to alter the session for me. If anything it enhances it. She knows I'm not a scammer or gameplayer and she can relax.
If you have such an issue with it, may I suggest that you place the envelope on the table and quickly excuse yourself to freshen up. This allows her to count it and you not to see it. Business settled and fantasy maintained: It's a win-win.
One reason that a lady may want count it in front of you and you may want to watch is so that if there is an innocent discrepancy it can be resolved without suspicion.
I had a provider friend tell me that a client gave her the donation and told her it was the fee plus $150 gratuity. It turned out it was the fee plus a $10 gratuity. If it was a simple miscount on his part (which she believed it was), he left there with a misconception regarding his generosity. She did him no service by NOT counting it in front of him. I told her it could have very easily gone in the other direction.
There is no way they could have, they put in in their purse and didn't go near it at all. I actually looked for it since I thought it was so strange, but when the girl doesn't leave your sight for an hour, you would notice if they did...
With one, I asked her what her rate was and she never told me, so I just went with what was on her profile (even though it was higher in some other places).
If they counted, then they should be magicians 
"The worst one for counting is Nina Hartely..And I have told her over and over again to stop doing that.."
I guess the counting does not really bother you that much if you keep seeing Nina, she keeps counting, you keep asking her not to, she continues to do it and you continue to see her. It begs the question, if she keeps doing it and you feel it represents a lack of integrity, why do you keep seeing her???? And, why should she stop if you see her anyway????
Because everytime I refer her to a friend of money they keep saying that and I have warned to stop doing it..
D
You missed the point...if its that big of a deal for you directly or indirectly, then why do you refer your friends to her?
And, this kills your argument...below you say you don't have a problem if she counts it the first time...if its your "friend," its not you, so it would be the first time for your "friend" seeing her...so again, what's the problem?
When requested but I usually tell the ladies "Please try not to do this"..or 'If you are late please give him a heads up because he does not like tardiness"..
I don't understand your second question but I will say I know what certain guys hate and I try to give the girls a heads up before..For example one guy who does overnights does not like to pay upfront but at the end of the date..So I warned the ladies "if you ask for the money upfront that will make him upset he will pay you don't worry"..
D
If you believe that counting the $$$ shows a lack of integrity, why would you consider to see the PSE and/or refer your friends to see her?
There's really only 2 answers here...either: (1) It may be something you don't like but you really don't see it as showing a lack of integrity; or (2) you really do believe it shows a lack of integrity but you really don't care. I'll let you pick which one of these options you want to be but either way your argument linking the counting of the $$$ as an example of a lack of integrity by the PSE is pretty much shot.
Personally, the counting doesn't bother me but I'll bet in most cases the escort has had an experience similar to the returning of the deposit that has been discussed over the last few days. For example, we've seen different TER members discuss how they will never put down another deposit because of a past instance of an escort/PSE failing to show-up and then not returning the deposit. Similarly, it doesn't take a lot of thought to imagine that the escort/PSE who counts the $$$ has probably been ripped off before by a prior client, friend or whatever so she's decided to protect herself, she's going to count the $$$ first and then does not have to worry about it during the session or after. Its really not that big of deal. You shouldn't take it so personally. In most of the cases, it probably less of a reflection on you and more the result of a prior bad experience.
I fully understand that for some it is kinda a mood killer, but I really do not mind if the lady counts the money in my presence. Fact is, it is quite rare for this to happen, but no big thing to me when it does. My attitude is..it is a lot of money...I sure as hell counted it in front of the bank teller when I received it and I am not sure how I would feel if the lady returned from the bathroom claiming my envelope was short. Actually a lady I've been seeing for years in Dallas did email me once after a session and respectfully informed me that I had shorted her $50. Which in fact I had...I was mixed up on her outcall rate...I made it up to her later in the week but it is a reminder, we do make mistakes. Hmmm..I just remembered something...I was received a lavish thank you email from a Lady in DC I see regualary thanking me for the $100.00 tip...I must have miscounted..LOL...I guess it can work both ways. Danny..I definitely get your point of view...on this however, I shall have to submit the minority opinion.
... know how to act accordingly, without being told how to ...
If you are seeing gals that would need to read your list first, then you are not doing enough research before you book most likely.
XoXoX
~ Lorsha
That most girls in this business know how to act without being told what to do and I have the documentation to prove that..
And yes all girls need to look at my list because sometimes they forget..Especially the deposit part because the lady is quick to follow up "Where is my deposit" but when things fall apart and the guy wants his money back than it is "Why do you keep hounding me?" Like Keisha and Kate Frost..Two ladies who have excellent reviews but unfortunately guys were scared to post something because they were afraid of the either 1)white knights and 2) other girls being afraid to see them..
To say most escorts and porn ladies know how to act is living in fantasy world..Just like the guys there is a reason why escorts want the money upfront..LOL..
D
I don't know why someone would be afraid of a "white knight". From a post a couple of days ago, people here were calling for the outing of the lady who did not return a deposit. I think the due date was this Tuesday BTW.
I guess if that doesn't get figured out, he will announce who it was, and we will see how bad the backlash is.
While you are right that there were many calls to "out" the pse, at this point it is still a generalized discussion. If he had named her right off, and she was popular enough on the board, the "white knights" may have come out of the woodwork regardless of who was right or wrong.
... "some of us" then. 
It just seems insulting to us gals that ALWAYS do things the right way, to be "grouped" together with the one's that do not. And I took it as such.
XOXOX
~ Lorsha
Unfortunately you are wrong here. I am new to the whole PS thing but in my short time I have been quite amazed at some of the highly regarded and reviewed porn stars turn out to be totally about business when the reviews state otherwise. From Danny's list I have encountered these issues and I've seen five porn stars so far (Not a big sample size I know). Unfortunately I regretted spending the cash when it could have gone to someone much cheaper and much better in the performance area.
6) NOT COUNTING THE MONEY in front of a repeat customer! For a first time it is better to count it in the bathroom..Counting the money kills the mood and it reminds us that we are a 'John'..
Four have done this to me and one actually counted it in the bathroom and said I was $100 short (I counted it about five times before the session and was sure I had the correct amount) which made me think she pocketed the extra $100 in the bathroom...
7) If the lady is running late calling us and giving us a heads up..Not just showing up late..That shows disrespect for our time and a lack of integrity.
Twice they never called or showed up. Set up a second session with one of them for the following day, she again didn't call or show up. I called the booker (another PS in the business) and she called the girl in question. When the booker called me back she stated the girl sounded like she was high... *rolleyes*
8) Giving a guy less in performance than before for no reason than just not feeling like it..For example DFK'ing on the first appointment and than the second one after paying and you are in the middle of the session and the guy goes for the DFK and you turn your head saying "I don't feel like kissing and last time I shouldn't of"..That should have been discussed before!
Three of the five I have seen rushed the session and two wanted to just give me a happy five fingered ending as they didn't want to do any more after maybe 5-10 minutes into the "playtime."
9) A guy sees you the first time for let's say $300 and than he calls you to see you again and you see him..After the session is done you count the money and say "Hey Baby my rate is now $400"..A woman with integrity would say that BEFORE we walk in the door..
The only one that I returned to see did this. Not quite in the way Danny quoted it but still makes me feel foolish to have gone the PS route.
Maybe they see an easy mark and feel due to how I act during an appointment they can take advantage of me. I am very personable and nice and usually like to go out of my may to make a person feel comfortable, especially in these situations but I guess I am in the wrong side of the hobby. I should stick to independents I think.
Anyway good list Danny and I agree with all of them.
... I understand it's all an "illusion," but really... does it really bother you that much? For real?
Maybe we all need to loosen up a bit.
Again the problem is not counting the money the first time it is counting the money in front of a regular client..
Now two main things come from counting the money
#1) It reminds us what we are there for and kills the fantasy
#2) As she is counting the money our big head is reminding us of things such as "Damn this money should go towards my children" or "Perhaps I could have used this money towards my bills"..
"#1) It reminds us what we are there for and kills the fantasy"
I don't know, but handing out the envelope should already "destroy the fantasy."
"#2) As she is counting the money our big head is reminding us of things such as "Damn this money should go towards my children" or "Perhaps I could have used this money towards my bills".."
Why do you stand around while she does this?
Again... in real life, do you honestly think most of us have any chance with these women? This is why I don't get why people get so worked up about counting the money, EVEN IF YOU'RE A REGULAR. Yes, it's a fantasy, but in the end it's all an illusion. You're paying to play and you handed the moeny to them in the beginning.
I just think most of us need to loosen up and HAVE SOME FUN.
Those are your 2 "main" reasons???? If those are your reasons why this is an issue...how exactly is this an issue of integrity for the girl? If anything, it sounds like its more an issue of integrity for you. In other words, you don't want to be reminded of perhaps what else you probably should be doing with the money. That's an issue with your integrity, not the girl's.
He counted the money over and over before he walked in to make sure the money was there and the girl said after the session "Oh you are $100 short"..I have been there too where I just came from the ATM for the exact change and than I was supposedly short..You don't feel like arguing and you feel like "Well she needs this extra money more than me"..
That my friend is a lack of integrity..
D
...that the girl allegedly stole $100...yes, stealing and lying shows a lack of integrity...but by your prior statement, just the act of counting the money shows a "lack of integrity," so if the PSE counts the money and agrees its all there, according to you, that act in and of itself shows a lack of integrity.
Your example here is totally different. In this example, its not the counting of the $$$, its the alleged taking of $100, assuming the correct amount was there to begin with.
So, I'll ask again...how exactly does just the act of counting the $$$ show a lack of integrity by the PSE?
of different things to different people..You are not going to change my mind on this one..
That is my story and I am sticking to it! LOL
D
This is what you said:
"Inegrity can mean a lot of different things to different people..You are not going to change my mind on this one..
That is my story and I am sticking to it! LOL"
This is what you meant and what everyone else here knows if they have bothered to read through this thread:
"Okay...I'm either dead wrong on this but can't admit that I'm a hypocrite on this issue or just cannot explain myself, which leaves me with no basis to make the assertion in the first place.
I don't know what else to say so I'm just going to stop talking about it now and hope the bad man goes away...."
Now this is probably way over your head because of your educational background so if you need me to break down for you let me know..
D
I've got no problem with those "definitions," though your link is just an article representing ONE person's opinion as opposed to the definition found in dictionaries representing the widely accepted definition of the term.
But, that aside and for argument's sake, we can use your rather lengthy definition IF you can manage to identify exactly what parts of that definition the mere act of counting $$$ by the PSE violates. Not the stealing of money, just the mere counting of $$$ in your presence by the PSE...Come on Danny O, its your definition...my guess is you'll fumble and blather about and miss the target yet again but lets see if you can prove me wrong and succinctly put a coherent argument together that actually supports your point with everyone watching...I'm guessing you can't or won't but either way it should be entertaining.
Your real problem here isn't with integrity under either definition, its with trust. You don't like the fact that PSE counts the money after your first visit (or your "friend's" first visit) because it reflects her lack of trust in you. It means there is something about you that she finds questionable or untrustworthy and it makes you upset. Probably even more so because you know the same PSE probably does not count the money each time she sees others for private shows.
Instead of dealing with it, however, you try to throw it back at the PSE by questioning her integrity in a sort of discombobulated was of saying, "How can she trust others but not trust me? That shows a lack of integrity!!!" The hard truth is when Nina Hartley counts the money each time she sees you, it means she doesn't trust you. If she did, she wouldn't count the money. She has seen you before (or multiple times) and knows you well enough that her best judgment is that she had better count the money.
For what its worth, Webster's defines integrity as "firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values."
Its difficult to see under any circumstances how counting the money would represent a failure in the "firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values."
I can understand how some may think it "kills the mood" but that's really the hobbyist's issue. Its not the PSE showing a lack of integrity according to the word's common definition. End of discussion.
I had my first experience with a provide a couple of weeks ago . . . we didnt settle on the fee before we met, when I got there, she asked how long I wanted to be there and quoted a price. I had money already in an envelope, and I just left it on her desk. She never picked the envelope up in my presence, I assume she counted the money one of the times I was in the bathroom. That being said, I understand why the provider would count the money before anything went on, as this is, at bottom, a business transaction
that maybe your breath was really bad or she had eaten onions for lunch and decided not to kiss you. Its the same with rimming etc. maybe the first time it was cool but maybe the second time she could smell a little sumthin sumthin...that goes along with everything.