If a girl you see has a personality that has grown on you to the point where you enjoy her company more than the sex itself is it time to move on? Anyone have any past experiences they wouldn't mind sharing both good and bad? Any input would be helpful.
Yeah, unfortunately I think you are right. It is time to move on, I was never looking for an emotional connection with her or any woman. Like I said, she just grew on me over time. I agree, what I'm looking for is totally unrealistic and next to impossible. I'm not going to call her anymore. When she does contact me what is the best way to explain that I won't continue to see her? Although I feel she owes me nothing, I think that she deserves an explanation as to why I can't continue to meet her. Should I tell her a)over the phone b)through a text c)in person.
After I break it off with her I will feel like there will never be another girl I will meet where I won't have the upperhand. Accepting that it is time for me to move forward feels pretty lousy but I do take consolation that in all likelihood this is the worst I will ever feel about a particular woman. If this is as bad as it gets I will be just fine in a few days. I would like some feedback as how to tell her if anyone has any ideas. Even though I'm disappointed I've learned from her to never judge a book by its cover and that a woman's personality is more important than her looks.
-- Modified on 5/16/2011 8:00:43 PM
Remember if u two move in together it's promotion of prositution for u,,,VERY SERIOUS!!!!
dont invest in anything other than physical pleasure. a reasonable gift/tip maybe but no cars, homes, offers to "save" someone from this industry is wise. You are a man, there will always be someone younger, sexier, and a better conversationalist.
Well first I can't say, "more than the sex itself", but I recently met a non-PS provider on a recent business trip. Gorgeous young woman, fun nice to talk to, also mentioned she's interested in getting into porn while she's young just to do it.
Only booked an hour so we didn't have much time, but had a real hot session, multiple orgasms for her and a nice intense finish for me. What was so unusual was that this provider doesn't kiss, doesn't do bbbj which are basic must for me but I still enjoyed it more than most other sessions.
After she left I tried to sleep but still smelled her juices all over the spread. So I tried to call her agency to get her back but it was late and they said she wasn't available and tried to push another girl on me.
Went to sleep and as luck would have it, I had an unexpected invitation back to the city for business This time I made the appointment for multiple hours to make sure we had time.
She came in, I"d requested her scheduler to ask her to dress casual, be herself no need for glam. She came in looking all college girl and we sat and talked politics, news and other things over chardonay.
starting feeling warm and we started warming each other up. We slowly undressed each other and as I took off her clothes I kissed her body up and down, and back again; up to the neck and gently kissed her lips which is as far as she would go [for now]...
Picked her up and laid her on the bed and again, went to gently kissing her body with groovy music in the background rounding out our scene. Saving the best for last, after lot's of teasing and preparation, I tried to go down that happy trail but she stopped me short saying that she'd starting minstrel spotting that evening and didn't advise it. Thanked her for the warning and proceeded to kiss and nibble other parts from bottom to top, turning her over and back.
Then again, I begin to gently tease her lips with kisses and rubbing my nose against hers. Every so often I'd gently roll my moist tongue over her lips till eventually she slowly opened her mouth and let my tongue enter. Again, she doesn't kiss nor provide bbbj, as confirmed by all her previous reviewers, so I was a bit excited that she decided to open up. But it isn't so unusual.
After a bit more of that, and gently probing her with light fk's (didn't want to push her too far too fast), we got the coat and she tried to pull me into her. But it wasn't working that nite, she said the spotting had made her a bit sore and swollen so my dude was really uncomfortable.
Now, not that I didn't try many times to get in the kitty but the rest of the night was basically the foreplay and teasing that I mentioned above with eventually more passionate fk's.
Afterwards we had a good talk about it, and confessed how attracted to each other we were and other compliments about our interaction together. Although I was really disappointed she wasn't able to give me full service that nite, we exchanged phone numbers and email addresses and still talk and are trying to make plans to visit each other at some point.
Now, I've been with quite a few providers [ I stopped writing reviews 2 years ago] and this is the first one I've met that I would consider developing a real relationship with. Honestly the thing that would concern me most is that she's 20 and I'm 35 although I look younger.
For now I'm just looking forward to a time she can visit NY, and trying to find any opportunity I can to go back to that town....
Only booked an hour so we didn't have much time, but had a real hot session, multiple orgasms for her and a nice intense finish for me. What was so unusual was that this provider doesn't kiss, doesn't do bbbj which are basic must for me but I still enjoyed it more than most other sessions.
After she left I tried to sleep but still smelled her juices all over the spread. So I tried to call her agency to get her back but it was late and they said she wasn't available and tried to push another girl on me.
Went to sleep and as luck would have it, I had an unexpected invitation back to the city for business This time I made the appointment for multiple hours to make sure we had time.
She came in, I"d requested her scheduler to ask her to dress casual, be herself no need for glam. She came in looking all college girl and we sat and talked politics, news and other things over chardonay.
starting feeling warm and we started warming each other up. We slowly undressed each other and as I took off her clothes I kissed her body up and down, and back again; up to the neck and gently kissed her lips which is as far as she would go [for now]...
Picked her up and laid her on the bed and again, went to gently kissing her body with groovy music in the background rounding out our scene. Saving the best for last, after lot's of teasing and preparation, I tried to go down that happy trail but she stopped me short saying that she'd starting minstrel spotting that evening and didn't advise it. Thanked her for the warning and proceeded to kiss and nibble other parts from bottom to top, turning her over and back.
Then again, I begin to gently tease her lips with kisses and rubbing my nose against hers. Every so often I'd gently roll my moist tongue over her lips till eventually she slowly opened her mouth and let my tongue enter. Again, she doesn't kiss nor provide bbbj, as confirmed by all her previous reviewers, so I was a bit excited that she decided to open up. But it isn't so unusual.
After a bit more of that, and gently probing her with light fk's (didn't want to push her too far too fast), we got the coat and she tried to pull me into her. But it wasn't working that nite, she said the spotting had made her a bit sore and swollen so my dude was really uncomfortable.
Now, not that I didn't try many times to get in the kitty but the rest of the night was basically the foreplay and teasing that I mentioned above with eventually more passionate fk's.
Afterwards we had a good talk about it, and confessed how attracted to each other we were and other compliments about our interaction together. Although I was really disappointed she wasn't able to give me full service that nite, we exchanged phone numbers and email addresses and still talk and are trying to make plans to visit each other at some point.
Now, I've been with quite a few providers [ I stopped writing reviews 2 years ago] and this is the first one I've met that I would consider developing a real relationship with. Honestly the thing that would concern me most is that she's 20 and I'm 35 although I look younger.
For now I'm just looking forward to a time she can visit NY, and trying to find any opportunity I can to go back to that town....
In my experience I have developed a relationship w the girl in question where she is just a regular girl to me. I forget what she even does until it somehow comes up in conversation. I prefer to change the subject because her movie career is absolutely no interest to me. I understand what she does and am not jaded but it is something I'd rather not discuss.
Haha, after I leave her and her scent is all over me I still get all fired up, so I can relate
I also tell this girl to not to put on any makeup, I am very attracted to her. Any girl can throw on makeup and look decent. It takes a truly beautiful girl to wear workout clothes and still look great.
I will save you from the details but the sex w her gets more intense and pleasurable each time at least for me anyways. She seems to enjoy herself more each time as well but I don't know for sure. I enjoy the intimacy I share w her more than the sex itself. I know she is good at her job but I feel like we have developed a genuine rapport over time as well.
I'm just starting to wonder what the point of developing a deeper attraction to this girl each time I see her. I'm starting to feel like what's the point. It will eventually go no where, common sense tells me there is no way our relationship will go beyond what it is right now. I used to have to urge her to take the money, now she accepts the payment without protest which only serves to reinforce my belief.
She is only the second escort I have ever seen and I am fairly certain she will be the last. I'm not some lonely guy who can't get woman. It wasn't as if I was looking for a relationship and used her to fill a gap that was missing in my life. Her personality just grew on me as we went. She took me by surprise.
I'm younger than she is so the age thing isn't an issue for me at least. Although I do well enough financially I could never afford to provide her with the type of lifestyle she is accostemed to. I justify to continue to see her by not thinking down the road and I assume each time I see her will it be my last that way I don't get attached.
There were a couple of signs when I knew I was in trouble, recently a friend had the avn awards on tv and I was disgusted by hearing how silly most of the woman sounded and wondering which males had slept with her. I obviously didn't want to show any weakness to my friend so I just sat there and toughed through it w/o showing it was getting under my skin. I don't watch porn anymore for a variety of reasons all relating back to her.
i hate to say it, but it sounds like you got played. i know you may think she is into you, but the truth is she has your $$ and you came away thinking that you have a relationship with her. of course she will want to continue this as much as she can. and why does it matter that you are 35 and she is 20 (i'm just curious because i have met some civilians with similar age difference). by the way, who is the provider that you are referring to?
hey jt,
i know why you would say that, and i had the same feeling too, but i didn't panic or let it out I just let the nite flow and based on our interaction i believe she was sincere. when i saw we tried many times to get me inside of her, i mean she tried, we tried from multiple positions for some time. she wanted it but it just wasn't happening. she actually had me call her agency to let them know what happened and that she was planning staying extra time to make up for my frustration but they weren't having it as they aren't really under obligation to provide anything. "money is for time and companionship only". 
i didn't mention in the first email but i did get that bbbj as a consolation on her way out the door.
and i actually asked for her number or email address the first time i met her and she declined because she's seen her agency track girls and fire them for booking outside the agency. that agency is intense. i'm not in favor of working with them.
but on this nite she gave me the digits and email addy, but was very clear that i should be careful not to slip up and somehow let the agency find out. sod there's no way i could tell you who she was or even the city she works in.
and on the age thing, that's just me. she's still young and ultimately wants to do young girl things that i'd never be in to. so i'd rather keep any relationship if there is one at some distance.
Maybe so, maybe not. The problem is you can momentarily convince yourself that she wants to be with you irrespective of any cash transaction but, in the end, there is always doubt. And doubt is poison for any intimate relationship. On the other hand, if money is not an issue and you don't care why she wants to be with you then by all means don't walk away.
High time to stop objectifying her.
When she becomes more than an object of your sexual desire and feelings of empathy develop, it is high time to stop paying her for sex and companionship.
I always enjoyed her company and never pushed the boundaries. I just have become increasingly attracted to her personality over time. Unfortunately for me I'm at the point where I'm more into her personality than her looks and I was contemplating ending our arrangement because of it. I feel like when you are more excited to see the girl and catch up with her rather than hookup it is time to move on.
I've had some varied experiences related to this.
Years ago not long after I entered the hobby, I became smitten with a young girl who was only a little younger than I (I was around 24). She worked for a high volume agency but seemed to be into me a little, I think because I was her youngest client and we seemed to have the same vocabulary (mostly due to age) We saw each other weekly and exchanged personal contact info, she sometimes would call me late at night just to chat. It was all very fun. She eventually left the agency and actually accepted my invitation for a "real date". I was excited and at some cost to me got tickets to see Rent when the show was in its heyday and difficult to get tickets to.
To make a long story short, she stood me up and I saw the show alone. I was heartbroken. She didn't return my calls but a few days later I saw a review go up of her as an indpendent on TER . I contacted the reviewer and learned that his appt with her was the same evening as our date. I had no problem with the fact that she needed to make money, but she knew we had plans I just would've preferred she call me rather than stand me up. About a week later she was back at the agency where she and I had met the first time about a year prior. I made an appt and went to see her. Her entire demeanor had changed, she was mean, rude and stand offish. I never saw her again.
I decided that I would no longer seek a personal relationship and rarely saw a provider more than once or twice.
However in the last few years of I've become more flexible on that rule and its been emotionally rewarding. I haven't "dated" anyone per se, but have become genuine friends with a handful of ladies. I learned to really enjoy those sessions with those whom I've established a friendship with. I like the banter, the catching up, learning about their personal lives and them learning and caring about mine.
In one case she is long retired, but we still stay in touch and catch up, no intimacy what so ever.
But I try to be careful and never let if progress past the "friends with benefits" label. I wont delude myself into thinking there is a greater connection than just friends.
I have never had any illusions in this lifestyle...If i was looking for a relationship, i'd be going to match.com, or some other dating site..And even w/the type of appts. i book, that doesn't change anything either...I totally get this lifestyle is for non-committment fun and games..And i leave soon for another LA trip so looking foward to that...
I see a few gals socially that I used to see as escorts. In some cases they no longer wanted to escort, and in one case I was no longer interested in seeing her as an escort, but we go out and dine or visit museums with her child. (I've known this person over 20 years.)
I have very good times socially with many of the escorts I know and never see that as a problem with the sexuality. In fact, I pretty much insist on there being a good personality fit to keep seeing someone as a regular.