I have a porn star friend who I address with her real name when meeting her for lunch or emailing, calling or just hanging out -- when she's not in "character." I use her stage name when she's working and definitely if anyone else is in earshot. Depends on the room.

Inside the club you always address her by her stage name unless or until she tells you otherwise.

I know many Providers by their real name....As they know mine. It is an expression of trust when we share this info.  I would never violate that trust by using the babes real name in any sort of public setting....I know you circunstance is a little different, but I really feel addressing the lady by her real name would more likely freak her out than impress her.

I presume that the phrase "to further get to know her" means that this is not someone that you have already met.  This means you are just a fan.

If you came by her name through hours and hours of google searches, it is unlikely that she will be impressed by your cyberstalking.  It's more likely she'll ask the club's security to keep an eye on you.

On other hand, if her real name is public knowledge then she might be mildly impressed that you are a big fan.

to make feel special? embarrass  her?

Don't you think if she wanted her real name to be known, she would have used it.

Play by her rules you gain respect. Play by your rule may loose your special status!

If she wanted strangers to use her real name, she wouldn't have an alias.  People choose stage names for many reasons, but in porn it's usually to protect a personal life... Using her real name isn't going to impress her or attract her to you, in fact, the opposite could happen.

Naturally, I know many real names of the PSEs I'm friendly with; the truth is that several of them prefer to be called by their stage name.  Nikki Diamond told me that so many more people knew her and called her by that name that she was more used to hearing it than her real one, so she got used to it and preferred it.

So unless you're a personal friend, keep the intimacy of her real name t yourself.

It's like dealing with children in here!

You already know what the answer is, you just want to flaunt the idea that you know a pornstar's real name, right?

stick to the stage name unless you are in private. They dont want everyone knowing their name (unless you are in another town, incognito)..stay with the stage name my friend!

In the cases where I knew the PS' real name, I followed her lead and defaulted to her PS name until she told me otherwise.  So, if she wrote me an email and signed it by her real name, I would respond back to her under her real name.  If she left me a voice message under her PS name, I would respond back to her under her PS name.

In your case, if it were me, I would use her PS name until she says, "Oh, you can call be by [insert real name here]."